just tell me Options

[Heathasm]

my problems...
-my parents are going through the longest divorce ever and are screaming stealing and hurting each other every day
-im having eating problems due to depression
-lately i've been sore all over for no reason...im thinking its due to stress and/or depression
-problems with people at work
-sleeping problems (aka i sleep more than 12 hours a day)

and now my bf..
-hes the greatest sweetest sexiest thing in the world and i love him alot
-hes horrible at comforting and just doesnt understand
-he doesnt know my bad side very well and i know ill never show it to him
-my parents wont let him near me in their presence

my bf takes away the pain, hes sort of a numb sollution that makes me forget about every thing that is going wrong with me right now
1. if i keep seeing him i feel like ill never be able to fix myself
2. i notice that my attitude and self lately are having and effect on him and i fear that ultimately i will end up hurting him more later and in a slow torturous way than i would if i broke it off now
3. basically i fake every thing im feeling when im around him, but i like doing it because it makes me feel good for some sick reason

if we stopped seeing each other i would be forced to confront every one of my problems and not use him as an escape and he could get over me and find some one who is happy and to make himself happy

and now...i need an outside opinion
do i need to break up with him as soon as possible?
i dont need advice on what else to do..this is how it is and i dont know what to sacrifice...but maybe i do..i need other people's opinions

[urbanychic]

maybe you should talk to a psychiatrist or someone that doesn't really know your personal background (your parents, boyfriend, etc) so they have nothing to judge you on and then you can talk at your desire.


btw, if you want to talk to someone, i'll be here. I don't know if this means much to you or if this factor has any significance, but I'm going to school to be a psychologist so .. i can help to the best that i can do.

as for your situation with your boyfriend, it's a tough situation. he blocks out the pain you are experiencing at home but he also makes you not feel like yourself. this may sound weird or what ... but maybe try telling him everything you want to tell him. make a compromise with him. he can't talk to you until you touch your ear or something like that. he has to listen to you .. you have to just get everything you want to say off your chest. another option that i find that works a great deal is to write people letters but not actually give it to them. write a letter about how you feel about the current sitatuon with your parents, about your boyfriend, even write one about yourself to yourself. it's a wonderful sorce of therapy. really, it is.

for the depression, there is so much one can do to alleviate the pain. is there something you truly enjoy doing; alone? Like dancing or singing or maybe even drawing? if so, whenever you feel depressed, do exactly what you enjoy doing. spend as much time as you can. in the long run, you'll feel better about yourself and grow as an individual. good luck to you! depression and divorce is a horrible experience and i've been down that road before and i offer my support to you if you need it.

[Heathasm]

maybe you should talk to a psychiatrist or someone that doesn't really know your personal background (your parents, boyfriend, etc) so they have nothing to judge you on and then you can talk at your desire.

i thought about that but i cant afford one and i dont goto school so i dont have a school councelor or any thing...idk i doubt i could go for that any way

as for your situation with your boyfriend, it's a tough situation. he blocks out the pain you are experiencing at home but he also makes you not feel like yourself. this may sound weird or what ... but maybe try telling him everything you want to tell him. make a compromise with him. he can't talk to you until you touch your ear or something like that. he has to listen to you .. you have to just get everything you want to say off your chest. another option that i find that works a great deal is to write people letters but not actually give it to them. write a letter about how you feel about the current sitatuon with your parents, about your boyfriend, even write one about yourself to yourself. it's a wonderful sorce of therapy. really, it is.

i dont know if i got this through with my post but he just doesnt understand i have really truely tried to explain but he some how changes the subject or we end up doing som ething, its just weird i cant communicate that part of my life with him. ive told him things that go on at my house but its no comfort whatsoever...nothing changes

the letter to myself is a great idea...im going to do that

for the depression, there is so much one can do to alleviate the pain. is there something you truly enjoy doing; alone? Like dancing or singing or maybe even drawing? if so, whenever you feel depressed, do exactly what you enjoy doing. spend as much time as you can. in the long run, you'll feel better about yourself and grow as an individual. good luck to you! depression and divorce is a horrible experience and i've been down that road before and i offer my support to you if you need it.

i spend too much time alone..if any thing i need to be around people and have them comfort me cause i just feel crazy right now