He Won't Go Away, He won't leave me alone :( Options

[tetrastar]

(EDIT)::: Thank you everyone for helping me. I don't need further advice on this. :::(/EDIT)

To anyone that reads this, thanks for using your time on me. To anyone who has any advice, thank you extra!
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Someone happened to come across my Xanga and do one of those "hey, random props" comments and so I propped him back and we eventually became friends. We talked online over AOL Instant Messenger, and then I guess he liked me so he asked me for my phone number. Fortunately, I was smart enough not to give it to him. "That's ok. I don't want to make you feel uncomfortable," he said. So we stayed friends and talked some more. Then I told my friend he asked me to go out to lunch with him one day and she got really mad at me so we got into a fight. She figured he knew my email, full name, the town I lived in, and how I looked like, so he would come to my house and kidnap me or something.

She was looking out for me, so I told X (I'm going to call him X) to stop talking to me and to forget me and I'll do the same and act like nothing ever happened. Well, I have this Anti-Stalker module that tells me who visited my page when, and he STILL visited my page after, which freaked me out because he visited my page more than I myself visited it, and that is just plain creepy and stalkerish.

I never confronted him about it, thinking he would eventually lose interest and go away. As time went on, his logged visits lessened and eventually disappeared. Until I noticed that he logged out of his username and had a different IP Address. I knew this because he forgot to log out one time and I traced that IP Address to all the other "anonymous" visits. I got really scared (still am) but he never commented or said anything, so I left him alone. Well, it was my birthday August 16th (just a couple days ago), and he emailed me. He acted like nothing was wrong, which offended me a lot. He wanted to do something with me on Sunday, like take me out to the movies or something. Well, I knew I needed to shoot him down, but I didn't know how so this is the email I wrote to him:

"Hey X

I guess you forgot that I'm not supposed to talk to you...
This is going to sound really mean and all, but I think it's really
creepy that you would still think of me and remember me. I need to put
my foot down and just say it. Please leave me alone. It makes me
uncomfortable. I just want to forget everything and you make me feel
scared.
I do not want to go out with you, I am sorry. I am flattered that you
would want to do something with me, but I'm sorry I can't accept. To
be blatantly honest (so as to not lead you on or anything), I don't
want to have any kind of relationship with you. I just want you to
leave me alone... And this is not because of my friend or my family or
anything, this is from ME. I myself have made this decision. You
really creep me out.
Please if you have any respect for me, please move on with your life
and leave me out of it. I know you'll find a nice girl to go to the
movies with and all, but it's not me. Sorry to reply in such a mean
way, but it's the only way to get you to stop bothering me. Sorry.

And thanks for the Happy Birthday."

I have not gotten a response yet. I'm pretty sure he checked his email, because he was expecting my reply. I'm really scared. I want this guy out of my life and now he's figured out a way to BLOCK his OWN IP Address so now even my stalker tracker won't work on him. How do I know? He left a "Happy Birthday" comment on my xanga on my birthday, but when I check my tracker it doesn't have any record of him visiting my page at all.

HE WILL NOT LEAVE ME ALONE!! I feel as if my life is ruined

[Ilaem]

Ruined
Defiantely not

Anyway--
You lost me less than half way
eeek

[tetrastar]

:( Did I make it too confusing? Well in a nutshell there's a creepy guy from xanga and he won't stop bothering me and I don't know how to make him go away!

[kill me please]

so he lives by you? like the same town? dang that sucks then. i think you need to tell an adult. but then again maybe your email response will be enough.

[Hell-Rell]

whoa you......really got it bad

[tetrastar]

No he doesn't live in the same town I live in, he lives in a different one (same state). Yeah sucks for me and I can't do anything about it :(

[Paradox of Life]

You shouldn't care anymore.. it's just some online freak. If you didn't give him your address or anything, it should be alright. Just don't communicate with him anymore. If he sends you an E-mail back, delete it before you open it. If you want him to leave you alone, you have to LEAVE HIM ALONE.

[aera]

i have an anti stalker module too. well theres not much you can do about it... but you can block him. or change xangas and not have him know.

[tetrastar]

Yes but since he knows my name and the town I live in, he could easily look me up. I'm afraid he'll show up at my house one day.

He could turn from just and online freak to a creepy stalker in a matter of seconds =|

I don't think he'll email me something. What REALLY bothers me is that he figured out a way to block his IP address so now he could be reading my Xanga without me knowing it. And I know I can get a new xanga, but then I'd have to tell all my xanga friends and he'd probably hunt THEM down too and find out my new xanga name.

[silver-rain]

If you're so worried about the xanga, why not make your entries protected, so only people you want can read them?
Otherwise, just leave him alone and hopefully he'll leave you alone.

[tetrastar]

Thanks, I hadn't thought of that. But what if I also want other people who come by my page to read my stuff too?

I think I'll just take your advice and leave him alone. But first should I send another mean email to him? Just in case the first one wasn't harsh enough?

[Paradox of Life]

Have you told your parents?

[_sarcastic_]

ignore him, eventually he'll go away. i mean so what if he visits your xanga more than you do, he's not propping you. it's not exactly harming you in any way cept for freaking you out. leave it alone, he'll soon get the message and go away.

[tetrastar]

I have not told my parents because they probably won't do anything or think much of it. I've told my older sister and my friends.

Yeah I guess I should just try to forget about him and hopefully he'll do the same. Cause I did try that at first and I thought it worked until he emailed me on my birthday.

[*mipadi*]

I don't really see the big deal.

So the guy kept reading your Xanga, wanted to talk to you--so what? Yeah, maybe it's weird he wanted to get together with you in person, but if you never gave him any personal info, there's really nothing to be worried about. You kind of broke things off suddenly with him with little explanation, and he probably doesn't see the harm in continuing to read your Xanga. If you don't want people to do that, don't post stuff on the Internet.

I'd just let it go and not worry about it. It doesn't seem that dangerous or distressing.

[dao]

block his xanga... and any other xanga of his, or just send him a virus, haha jk

a town is pretty big.. it would be a small chance that he will go to another town and look for you endlessly

and he only emailed once...dont worry about it

[megan_x3]

Tell the police if he still do harass you in any other ways. If he continues to bother you and continues to stalk you in your xanga ; tell the police.

[xsilent_angelx]

iht doesnt really sound like a big deal really.. if i were yew i souldnt hav given him the information in the first place. he doesnt sound tat harmful anyway. mayb he really is a good guy. the reason yew start`d feelin` uncomfortable was probably coz yur friend start`d say`n he mite kidnap yew nd stuff -__-. mayb iht wouldve been nice to invite some friends with yew nd actually meet him. he wont do anything weird if yew had ppl with yew. and if im all rong bout this then i guess yew juss ignore him like the ppl said.. change yur xanga nd stuff.

[PinkTrash]

You're worried that he'll show up at your door? Unless you gave him your adress its pretty hard to look you up, so don't worry about that. It looks like he's just some lonely guy, but if you're still scared then change your email & xanga & any other info you gave him

[xXMomoBubbleTeaX...]

too long for me to read..

[*suddenly she*]

1) thanks for making that easy to understand and read.
2) good job on being mature about it and not going "KASDABLAHLEAVEMEALONE"

i'd say blank out your site (there's a script for that here) and keep the tracker in there in case he decides to think that it's okay to undo whatever he did to make himself invisible. change your aim screename and when you use your new one, only sign on as invisible.

get your friend back and let her know that you need her to be on your side. tell all the people you can trust - the counselor at school, parents if possible, and friends. be surrounded by a horde or people. find guy friends to hang out with you all the time.

hope everything works out.

[tetrastar]

Well it's not such a big deal to you if you're not the one experiencing it... I guess I've calmed down now after reading some of the above posts, but I'm afraid I'll bump into him when I'm in the city (I might be going to the same college he's at ). Oh well. If I DO confront him, I'll just say everything to his face.

And I do not want to meet up with him, even if I bring any friends. I simply do not like him and he just doesn't see it .

----

And I know I was really stupid and naive, believe me I've heard it all from my friend already. I've never had a boyfriend before and I get nervous whenever I talk to guys so I guess I let my guard down a lot... I shall definitely learn from my lessons.

I have thought about getting a boyfriend and then saying how much I love my boyfriend on my xanga so that he might get discouraged. Except I can't find one so that makes things a little difficult... Oh well. When the time comes, I guess.

----

Thanks to everyone who helped me- I don't think I need anymore advice (I might forget to check the board anyway). I've decided to just ignore him and everything about him and continue on with my life. If he tries to talk to me I'll just tell him all that I have to say and if anything gets beyond that I'll report him to the authorities.

Thanks everyone!