Parents..., say the darnest things |
 Jun 24 2005, 05:25 PM
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#1
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 Newbie  Group: Member Posts: 5 Joined: Apr 2005 Member No: 129,273  |
What are some of the weirdest things your parents have ever said?
Lol, today I asked my mom, "Did you cut your hair?" Mom: "No, why?" Me: "It looks different." Mom: "That's 'cause I vaccuumed it." Me: "..WHAT?!" Mom: "Oh no wait! What is that thing..you do?" Me: "..blowdry?" Mom: "Yeah, that!" Me: *Literally falls off of bed laughing.* Mom: "That's not funny." Me: "Haha, yeah it is." |
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Jun 24 2005, 05:27 PM
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#2
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Senior Member Group: Member Posts: 1,899 Joined: Oct 2004 Member No: 57,580 |
lol is vacumed like sucking in and blow dryer blows. lol vaccummed
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Jun 24 2005, 05:34 PM
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#3
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 dudeee! Group: Member Posts: 873 Joined: Jun 2004 Member No: 23,897 |
i was driving and my dad was sitting next to me (i only have my permit).. anyways, i was trying to change lanes but this guy driving a lexus makes a turn from the opposite side of the road and tries to come into my lane.. we were about an inch from hitting each other so i turned the steering wheel the other way and went back into the lane i was in before...
this whole convo was in korean.. dad: ahh look at that crazy person! drive up next to him i want to curse him out! me: dad.. how? you don't know how to speak english.. dad: yes i do! look.. i know this word.... PUCK! (he said that in english lol he was trying to say f***) me: where the hell did you learn that from?! dad: 
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Jun 24 2005, 05:36 PM
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#4
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 kristin Group: Member Posts: 5,705 Joined: Feb 2004 Member No: 3,985 |
When I was 12...my mom asked me if I was a lesbian.
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Jun 24 2005, 05:40 PM
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 This bitch better work! Group: Staff Alumni Posts: 13,681 Joined: Jul 2004 Member No: 28,095 |
my dad thought i was like 17 or somewhere around there whenever i was 14. he also thought my birthday was like in june whenever it's in october. it funny in a way but it makes me upset that my own dad doesn't even know my age and/or birthday!
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Jun 24 2005, 06:01 PM
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#6
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 Senior Member Group: Human Posts: 1,152 Joined: Jan 2004 Member No: 2,239 |
QUOTE(xx angelbabu xx @ Jun 24 2005, 12:34 PM) dad: ahh look at that crazy person! drive up next to him i want to curse him out! me: dad.. how? you don't know how to speak english.. dad: yes i do! look.. i know this word.... PUCK! (he said that in english lol he was trying to say f***) me: where the hell did you learn that from?! dad:   my dad actually did that. he said "puck you!" to this guy who overtook us.me - i want one baby brother/sister. mom - i get my period me - the butt? (i wasnt thinking & i regret saying that) parents - *mad look on their face* where you learn that? me - sex ed. (i lied) (i talk in pidgin. not an accent, just a way of talking in hawaii. if you ever come to hawaii, you might notice some locals talking this way.) |
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| *x____duckii* |
Jun 24 2005, 06:03 PM
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QUOTE(Frankie @ Jun 24 2005, 6:40 PM) my dad thought i was like 17 or somewhere around there whenever i was 14. he also thought my birthday was like in june whenever it's in october. it funny in a way but it makes me upset that my own dad doesn't even know my age and/or birthday! Aww, poor Frankie.  Anyways, my mom used to day, "You are so fresh!", but it was funny because since she has an accent, so yeah... |
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Jun 24 2005, 06:04 PM
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#8
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This bitch better work! Group: Staff Alumni Posts: 13,681 Joined: Jul 2004 Member No: 28,095 |
oh yeah...and whenever my mom REALLY likes something...instead of saying NICE she says like NOISE. it makes me laugh.
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| *x____duckii* |
Jun 24 2005, 06:17 PM
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#9
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^ That's very noise of you.
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Jun 24 2005, 06:26 PM
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 Day's Nearly Over Group: Staff Alumni Posts: 4,553 Joined: Aug 2004 Member No: 45,183 |
*sigh*
Me: Do you have a pen I can use? Mom: ... what? Me: Do you have a pen I can use? Mom: Oh.. no.. we don't have pineapple juice. 
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Jun 24 2005, 06:38 PM
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#11
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 Senior Member Group: Member Posts: 2,881 Joined: Apr 2005 Member No: 132,134 |
me and my dad are in the car. he gets mad really easily if the people ahead done drive fast.
Me: hahahaa; your not gonna get past that light. Dad: oh yes i can (in chinese) Me: noo your not Dad: ohh yess i amm Me; no your not. Dad- c`mon babbbyyy.. let me past; c`mon babayy -the car in frontof us pastes throught the green light just as it turned red- me:AHAHAHAHAAA -points at him- dad- FOOK. (F***) |
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Jun 24 2005, 07:57 PM
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#12
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 memories live FOREVER<3 Group: Member Posts: 1,150 Joined: Apr 2005 Member No: 132,793 |
my parents are so dull. sometime i wish i can have a parent like paris hilton [even though i hate her] she goes out party all night haha
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Jun 24 2005, 10:57 PM
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 i'm susan Group: Official Member Posts: 13,875 Joined: Feb 2004 Member No: 5,029 |
Me: Oma. what do you want?
Mom: I want a f*ck. Me: what?! ROFL! HAHAHA you mean you want a fork? Mom: Yes, a f*ck. Me: .... oma. say PHO. Mom: FUH Me: 퍼크 Mom: 퍼크. Me: wow that still sounds like it. Um... it's FOOOOORRK. Mom: F*****************CKKKKKKKKKKKK. Me: ok i give up. it's funny how they cant say the right pronunciation lol. |
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Jun 24 2005, 11:02 PM
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 My name's Katt. Nice to meet you! Group: Member Posts: 3,826 Joined: Jan 2005 Member No: 93,674 |
I got my ear pierced twice and I have to keep an earring in the newest piercing, (so it doesn't close up) so one day it was like this:
Mom: Catherine? Me: Yes? Mom: Do you have something on your second hole? o_o; |
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Jun 24 2005, 11:02 PM
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#15
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yerp! Group: Member Posts: 3,489 Joined: Nov 2004 Member No: 66,454 |
Yes, us parents are quite the bunch.
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| *jooleeah* |
Jun 24 2005, 11:15 PM
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#16
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QUOTE(iheartsimba @ Jun 24 2005, 6:36 PM) When I was 12...my mom asked me if I was a lesbian. That's because of...you know who. =/ I think. I can't quite remember. My parents.....they're just weird. I can't remember a certain time where they were being really weird, though. |
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Jun 25 2005, 12:56 AM
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#17
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Hadas Group: Member Posts: 234 Joined: Dec 2004 Member No: 73,359 |
lol my dad pronounces things in the FUNNIEST ways.
he said determine like det-err-MINE (like gold mine) so funny! oh yea once he dropped a gallon of milk and it broke and there was a ton of MILK all over the floor.
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Jun 25 2005, 04:08 AM
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#18
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 Senior Member Group: Posts: 8,274 Joined: Mar 2004 Member No: 8,001 |
MOM: " nee stop it ah " <--chinese dialect ( you are stop it )
she mean to said " nee stupid ah " <-- you are stupid. |
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Jun 25 2005, 05:18 AM
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 boo Group: Member Posts: 5,512 Joined: Dec 2004 Member No: 71,765 |
God, I don't really remember. I'll edit this when I remember.
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| *Weird addiction* |
Jun 25 2005, 05:37 AM
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#20
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mom: Sandra, give me a bottle of sperm
me: WHAT? mom: give me a bottle of coke me: you said sperm mom: what? i said coke you fool me: no, you said sperm mom: go to your room!! I don't know if she actually said it or i missunderstood what she said, god i was pretty sure she said sperm, now i'm confused 
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| *Kathleen* |
Jun 25 2005, 07:48 AM
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#21
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QUOTE Yes, us parents are quite the bunch. Aw, but you're a cool female parental unit.  QUOTE Me: Do you have a pen I can use? Mom: ... what? Me: Do you have a pen I can use? Mom: Oh.. no.. we don't have pineapple juice. HAHA. Yeah, my parents do that. It's funny. QUOTE i was driving and my dad was sitting next to me (i only have my permit).. anyways, i was trying to change lanes but this guy driving a lexus makes a turn from the opposite side of the road and tries to come into my lane.. we were about an inch from hitting each other so i turned the steering wheel the other way and went back into the lane i was in before... this whole convo was in korean.. dad: ahh look at that crazy person! drive up next to him i want to curse him out! me: dad.. how? you don't know how to speak english.. dad: yes i do! look.. i know this word.... PUCK! (he said that in english lol he was trying to say f***) me: where the hell did you learn that from?! dad: shifty.gif That's funny; my mom can't pronounce it right, either. But chyeah, I love when my mom talks about her gay friend, and constantly calls him a 'her,' and so I tell her, and she's like, "I'm not calling her a girl!" So I just shake my head and...yeah...just shut up. |
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Jun 25 2005, 09:46 AM
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#22
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Hydro Azn Group: Member Posts: 81 Joined: Jun 2005 Member No: 155,718 |
QUOTE(xx angelbabu xx @ Jun 24 2005, 5:34 PM) i was driving and my dad was sitting next to me (i only have my permit).. anyways, i was trying to change lanes but this guy driving a lexus makes a turn from the opposite side of the road and tries to come into my lane.. we were about an inch from hitting each other so i turned the steering wheel the other way and went back into the lane i was in before... this whole convo was in korean.. dad: ahh look at that crazy person! drive up next to him i want to curse him out! me: dad.. how? you don't know how to speak english.. dad: yes i do! look.. i know this word.... PUCK! (he said that in english lol he was trying to say f***) me: where the hell did you learn that from?! dad: lol..that...just made my day |
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| *mzkandi* |
Jun 25 2005, 02:11 PM
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#23
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My mom once said to me and my brother
"Come inside or you'll be as black as the sun" We were like huh 0_o |
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Jun 25 2005, 02:47 PM
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#24
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RaWr! Group: Member Posts: 603 Joined: Jan 2005 Member No: 90,404 |
For some reason everytime i have this convo with my parents i feel more stupid
Me: Mom/Dad have you seen my such and such? Them: No. Ware you put it? Me:............. If i knew where i put it i wouldnt ask you >.< |
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| *paul murphy* |
Jun 25 2005, 02:53 PM
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#25
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Dad: What did Mrs. Doran say?
Me: Nothin much Dad: Mrs. Taylor? Me: Said you were a great teacher to her daughter. Dad: Mrs. Doran? Me: Uh...nothing. Dad: Anybody else say anything? Me: Don't think so Dad: What about Mrs. Doran? Me: 
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Jun 25 2005, 04:02 PM
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 ich heisse Meli. Group: Member Posts: 909 Joined: Apr 2005 Member No: 122,016 |
This wasn't my mom, but my close friend's mom. She, Lila, and Elise were in the front hallway, and Angie and I (Angie is Mrs. Jonas' daughter) were in the kitchen. We hear this LOUD laughing coming from the front room, and Mrs. Jonas was just like "what? what?"
Angie and I go back in there, and they basically repeat the conversation this way: Lila: (who lives on a farm and was moving closer to us). I was telling Mrs. Jonas about how we have to sell our cows and how one of them is wet. Mrs. Jonas: What do you mean by wet? Lila: well, that means we can get milk from them... Mrs. Jonas: Oh! I've been wet!! I start dying, but Angie just looks at her like "Mom, I canNOT believe you just said that..." |
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Jun 25 2005, 06:51 PM
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 ramble on... sing my song.. Group: Member Posts: 175 Joined: May 2005 Member No: 145,976 |
lol. that's pretty funny! your mom must have been having a long day..
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Jun 25 2005, 07:05 PM
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#28
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 What the fack. Group: Official Member Posts: 6,164 Joined: Mar 2004 Member No: 8,519 |
QUOTE(pure_potential89 @ Jun 24 2005, 3:25 PM) What are some of the weirdest things your parents have ever said? Lol, today I asked my mom, "Did you cut your hair?" Mom: "No, why?" Me: "It looks different." Mom: "That's 'cause I vaccuumed it." Me: "..WHAT?!" Mom: "Oh no wait! What is that thing..you do?" Me: "..blowdry?" Mom: "Yeah, that!" Me: *Literally falls off of bed laughing.* Mom: "That's not funny." Me: "Haha, yeah it is." ..what the hell? I posted this topic in NS, and that's mine. ..err, shouldn't you post your own thing and not someone else's? |
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Jun 25 2005, 08:55 PM
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#29
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 Senior Member Group: Member Posts: 2,152 Joined: Oct 2004 Member No: 57,818 |
HAHAHH! All of these are amazingly funny.
Last Thanksgiving me and my mom were watching the Macy's Day Parade and there were little pigs walking in front of the marching bands.. so I asked. Me: Mom, how do they train the pigs to walk on a leash? Mom: I don't know. I guess they ask them to. Me: WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?! Mom: The marching band.. It was soooo funny. Maybe you had to be there. And yesterday my dad comes downstairs and goes "PEACE UP, A TOWN DOWN." |
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Jun 25 2005, 10:01 PM
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#30
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Senior Member Group: Member Posts: 988 Joined: Feb 2005 Member No: 98,884 |
LMAO i vaccumed it... i don't really know what my parents say...
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Jun 25 2005, 10:13 PM
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#31
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 Donna-chan Group: Member Posts: 1,183 Joined: Mar 2005 Member No: 120,389 |
^ same here, "I vaccumed it", gosh parents these days don't even know what to call a "blowdryer"
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Jun 26 2005, 07:12 AM
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#32
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dudeee! Group: Member Posts: 873 Joined: Jun 2004 Member No: 23,897 |
oye.. i have another one.. haha.. i was trying to explain to my dad that my friend was at a party and couldn't come to dinner with us.. it went something like this..
(again this convo was in korean) dad: invite tara to dinner me: she can't go.. she's at a pa-tee (party.. i said it with a korean accent so my dad could understand) dad: what?! me: pa-tee!! dad: what did you say?! me: party!!! (in english) dad: ohhhh ok! see, i've lived in the US for so long that i don't understand when you say english words with a korean accent! see, you have say it like this: parrrrrty.. not pa-tee.. parrrrrty... me: ......you don't know english dad.... sigh.. 
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Jun 26 2005, 07:32 AM
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#33
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 former member Group: Member Posts: 706 Joined: Apr 2005 Member No: 122,339 |
purple ponies (self deleted 12/30/06)
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Jun 26 2005, 10:42 AM
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#34
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 Life's random. . . Group: Member Posts: 193 Joined: Jun 2005 Member No: 157,977 |
Just cause they can't speak english that well. . .
 [jerry] |
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| *not_your_average* |
Jun 26 2005, 12:32 PM
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#35
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Me: Mom, have you seen my cell phone?
Mom:.... Me: Mom? Mom... MOM! Mom: Huh? Oh yeah, um, the computer's working... |
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Jun 26 2005, 02:06 PM
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#36
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 asdfghjkl; Group: Member Posts: 187 Joined: Feb 2005 Member No: 104,038 |
my parents are fobs too.
it's not like they say anything funny... it's just they can't pronounce anything right. |
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Jun 26 2005, 02:17 PM
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#37
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 Senior Member Group: Official Designer Posts: 4,591 Joined: Dec 2004 Member No: 77,305 |
Lol, my mom mistakens some words too.
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Jun 26 2005, 05:08 PM
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#38
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 PRiNCESSxDANi91 Group: Member Posts: 50 Joined: Mar 2005 Member No: 108,101 |
My sister asked my mom how come she wasn't eating anything and she said "`cause I'm going to eat your sister's buns" and I was like "YOU'RE GOiNG TO EAT MY BUNS?!?!
 " and my mom was like "no no no I mean your hot dog buns" and I was like "I don't have a hot dog let alone buns for it" and she goes "you sick minded child I meant the buns from the hot dog your eating" and I'm like "oohhhhhh" `cause I don't eat hot dog buns. It might not be funny to you `cause you weren't there but it was just weird.
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Jun 27 2005, 09:40 PM
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#39
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 naïvety Group: Human Posts: 1,303 Joined: Jan 2004 Member No: 488 |
^ HAHAHHAHAHAA that was hilarious!!
Perverted minds..
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Jun 27 2005, 09:53 PM
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#40
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 ^^ 2005 Suzuki rm125 2-stroke. My baby... Group: Member Posts: 309 Joined: Feb 2005 Member No: 94,737 |
If I was to listin to my mom I would get dumber....
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Jun 27 2005, 09:57 PM
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#41
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 Senior Member Group: Staff Alumni Posts: 4,799 Joined: Aug 2004 Member No: 37,450 |
QUOTE(iheartsimba @ Jun 24 2005, 5:36 PM) When I was 12...my mom asked me if I was a lesbian. Awww =)
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Jun 27 2005, 10:01 PM
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#42
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 Senior Member Group: Member Posts: 893 Joined: Dec 2004 Member No: 68,217 |
"Is it pronounced 'peanut' or 'penis'?"
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Jun 27 2005, 10:05 PM
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#43
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 L!ckitySplit Group: Member Posts: 4,325 Joined: Apr 2005 Member No: 129,329 |
QUOTE(xx angelbabu xx @ Jun 24 2005, 6:34 PM) i was driving and my dad was sitting next to me (i only have my permit).. anyways, i was trying to change lanes but this guy driving a lexus makes a turn from the opposite side of the road and tries to come into my lane.. we were about an inch from hitting each other so i turned the steering wheel the other way and went back into the lane i was in before... this whole convo was in korean.. dad: ahh look at that crazy person! drive up next to him i want to curse him out! me: dad.. how? you don't know how to speak english.. dad: yes i do! look.. i know this word.... PUCK! (he said that in english lol he was trying to say f***) me: where the hell did you learn that from?! dad: lmao thats funny, i love when he's like after he said it
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| *incoherent* |
Aug 3 2005, 03:50 PM
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#44
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me: dad i heard on a commercial for the news that viagra can be used to cure diseases now...but i didnt watch to find out.
dad: like what...depression? lmfao. if you dont get that p/m me. |
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Aug 3 2005, 03:59 PM
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#45
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 sarcasm hides what you really feel Group: Member Posts: 550 Joined: Aug 2004 Member No: 37,105 |
my family were out to eat and my dad works with this guy who has a blind daughter who was applying to college. and he said i wonder what she is going to study and i looked at my mom and she said if you say braille im going to kick you. (im not really that harsh....)
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| *salcha* |
Aug 3 2005, 04:07 PM
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#46
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Me: (picks up a food item labeled $4.99) Mom, can we buy this?
Mom: No, it's cheaper at the other market. Me: How much? Mom: $4.98 |
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Aug 3 2005, 04:24 PM
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#47
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 sorry. i drowned your fish. Group: Member Posts: 1,485 Joined: Feb 2005 Member No: 98,683 |
this happened two days ago, we bought some food from burger king
me: where`s my ranch? dad: i gave it to you. me: umm no u didnt dad: yea i did i handed it to you. me: NO U DIDNT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! dad: yes i did. sister: heres ur ranch i found it on the side of the car me: see i told u! u didnt =P dad: yes i did, it just walked on the side of the car. wow. |
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Aug 3 2005, 05:29 PM
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#48
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 Bay Area YadadaDiiiig. Group: Official Member Posts: 4,249 Joined: Feb 2005 Member No: 103,202 |
mom : yo ucant wear tampos, you'll lose your virginity.
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Aug 3 2005, 05:34 PM
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#49
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 stephanie .. Group: Member Posts: 1,965 Joined: May 2004 Member No: 15,529 |
QUOTE(hiphop junkie @ Aug 3 2005, 5:29 PM) mom : yo ucant wear tampos, you'll lose your virginity. lmao my mom said that too ------------------------------------- +listening to The Birthday Massacre - Video Kid+ Mom: is that Madonna? Me: no... not really funny but it was weird...cuz TBM sounds nothing like Madonna |
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Aug 3 2005, 05:41 PM
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#50
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 TOISU!! Group: Member Posts: 1,996 Joined: Jan 2005 Member No: 92,516 |
Well. It's usually my dad who says the "darnest things" but yah.
There's a lot to tell but I'll give one that's stuck in my head. [This happened before I graduated from the 8th grade.] Me: "Man. I'm graduating soon. I can't believe it." Dad: "Oh yah huh. When is it?" Me: "This Friday I think." Dad: "Oh okay. When is your brother graduating?" [My brother was a junior at the time.]
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Aug 3 2005, 06:55 PM
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#51
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 :) Group: Member Posts: 1,234 Joined: May 2005 Member No: 146,496 |
QUOTE(enyceXaddiction @ Jun 24 2005, 7:57 PM) my parents are so dull. sometime i wish i can have a parent like paris hilton [even though i hate her] she goes out party all night haha hey, becareful what you wish for.. um, I really don't have any right now. Maybe I'll edit later if I can remember any. |
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Aug 3 2005, 09:18 PM
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#52
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 Senior Member Group: Member Posts: 2,248 Joined: Jul 2004 Member No: 30,084 |
haha ..hmm i always have awkward moments w/ my mom ..lol
every time she asks a question, i just assume that it's rhetorical, and don't respond lol. |
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Aug 3 2005, 09:46 PM
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#53
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Senior Member Group: Member Posts: 1,098 Joined: May 2005 Member No: 143,687 |
OK this is what happened::
Location: My room I was sitting down watching TV when my mom comes in very quietly and says OUT OF NOWHERE- Did you get raped? me: um No why? mom: Cuz i was watching this show and it said that if girls dont dress girly its because they were raped Me: WTF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! first of all I would have to be OUTSIDE to get raped wouldnt I? mom: Fine then go outside me: No comment |
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Aug 5 2005, 12:54 PM
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#54
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 My peanut. Group: Member Posts: 948 Joined: Jul 2005 Member No: 187,456 |
My mom says the stupidest things sometimes...
Me. Whats up mom? Mom: Whats the dillio jillio.. Me. Mom..no..never again.. |
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Aug 5 2005, 12:57 PM
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#55
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 it's our chemistry Group: Member Posts: 1,151 Joined: Jun 2004 Member No: 21,775 |
*family watching a movie*
Mom: ...why do they call him "Mr. Pimp?" Me: Dad+sister: uhh because that's what he is! Mom: ...what's a pimp? 
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Aug 5 2005, 12:57 PM
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#56
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 ¢¾ Wanting it. ¢¾ Group: Member Posts: 2,060 Joined: Aug 2004 Member No: 39,234 |
haha my dad always tells me how im fat like a grass
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