family troubles..., can you help me? Options

[krismiss678]

so i want to vent about something...my cousin is having a lot of problems. with her family, not herself. =[. her dad is dating this woman that no one in our family likes. shes really mean, and she is total trailer trash, and her son is an a-hole that is a smart aleck to EVERYONE. they come over to my cousin's house like all the time and eat all of their food. well, the thing is, they both smoke pot, like fo sho. and my cuz thinks her dad is smoking pot, which i know is true because he used to be a pot head when he met my aunt, and then she like saved his ass from the trailer park he lived in before and cleaned him up and married him. ever since she died, hes been getting deeper and deeper into being a weird person again and now i think hes finally gone off the deep end. my cousin obviously hates this woman and my uncle apparently doesnt care or just hasnt noticed. hes always criticizing her and yelling at her now. he even takes up for the son when there are arguements. last night i slept over there because i was in SC on the way home from a beach trip in NC and i had to stay with them so i could come home today. the woman AND her son slept over. which is obviously wrong, because i know what they were doing...and they might need to be a little bit more discreet about it. they even slept over when my uncles parents were there. thats so disgusting. like, we dont need to know when you're doing that kind of stuff, and they dont need to be sleeping over there anyway with my cousin in the house.. so anyways, the son just like sat in the room we were watching a movie in...and we were like in our pjs watching this movie and like about to go to sleep in there, and he just sits down with his headphones in the recliner (its like an entertainment room type thing) and like pretends to go to sleep. we asked him to leave politely like a million times because even though he wasnt really bothering us, we just wanted to have some "girl" time, to talk about things and when we told him that he was like, "well, im going to be sarahs step brother soon and everything she can tell you, she can tell me." i was just like "look, ive known sarah ever since she was born. since the day my aunt and uncle brought her home from the hospital, and we're extremely close. you want to tell me that you can talk to her like she talks to me?" but without the attitude. so sarah tells her dad and hes like, talking up for billy. and then he yelled at sarah. i was just like WHAT?! hes the one sitting in our room bothering US. we want to go to sleep and hes sitting in there with the music blasting through his headphones like staring at us while he "pretends" to sleep. ugh. it burns me up. i seriously just want to adopt sarah into our family so she can be raised with stability. i cant take hearing the way her dad talks to her sometimes. its so...hateful...i just dont know what to do. they wont get married for another four years because of my aunts money that she left for sarah for college, and if they get married, the money goes away. and the only reason my uncle can afford anything is because of my aunt. gosh. what do i do??? can i get him in trouble for smoking pot and have her taken away from him and bring her here? she kept asking me like if my parents could adopt her so she could get away from all of this non-sense. she really needs to leave his house. just help me if you can. thanks.

[yukichan]

i think there isnt much u can do for ur cousin..but what u can do for her is support her and be there for her when she needs someone..and invite her to things u do..sorry if im not much help..

[ichigofan]

wow thats a toughie well first of all you have to find tangible[physical] evidence that hes been smoking pot like left over plants and that kind of stuff or an eye witness account of his "high" behavior. the best thing is to talk to ure parents and convince them to adopt her for the time being good luck

[krismiss678]

well, ive talked to my parents. and they said that if my uncle were turned in with evidence, her grandparents would get her first. we were the ones that sarah would go to if her dad died, but if hes put in jail for possession of marijuana, the grandparents would have to decide who she'd go to if they cant take care of her.. i dont think there is much we can do except wait it out. just to se what happens. thanks for the advice. :)

[Shattered_Hope]

Well...hmm....you could always report him to the police...maybe for child abuse or inability to raise a child properly....or just get evidence that he smokes pot and then tell how badly your cousin should come live with you and your family because her family is not so great now. Meh, all in all.....just get your parents involved in this and maybe....they might be able to do something that you can't or haven't thought of. I hope this advice will help you but I'm sorry if it didn't. I hope it all goes well for your cousin....

[megan_x3]

You should tell the police on your uncle. Saying that he is abusing and mistreating his daughter. That's really messed up. As soon if Sarah gets in orphanage, you and your parent can adopt her, or without her becoming an orphan, you can just let her stay over at your place until shes 18. =)