If you believe that your best friend is a rapist, what do you do about it? |
 May 3 2005, 04:23 PM
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#1
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 hardbodyactiv...always so hard  Group: Member Posts: 119 Joined: Apr 2005 Member No: 130,804  |
Your best friend has started acting really weird lately...
He's preoccupied in an unnatural and violent way towards women using derogative and degrading speech and suggesting pathalogical sexual violence using a particular method, say, hooded and using a hammer as the threatening weapon. Then a girl gets attacked and raped and describes her attacker as hooded using a hammer to threaten her with. This is your best friend of 12 years. You went to school together and you've even talked about starting a business together after graduation. What do you do? Confront him and risk losing your best friend...or perhaps get attacked yourself? Go to the cops and shop your best friend, who may be innocent? Do nothing and hope that it wasn't him or was an isolated incident? Or something else? Whatever you do you could be about to lose your best friend. But you also may save another woman from this dreadful ordeal and perhaps save a lfe. Think about this one because its sure to have happened....  Peace Out |
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May 3 2005, 05:39 PM
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#2
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 This bitch better work! Group: Staff Alumni Posts: 13,681 Joined: Jul 2004 Member No: 28,095 |
TOPIC MOVED TO RELATIONSHIPS
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May 3 2005, 06:18 PM
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#3
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I am Sandy. Hear me roar. Group: Member Posts: 1,152 Joined: May 2004 Member No: 15,896 |
Damn. I suggest going to the police. It's better than having him attack another girl. Hell, it could be you if you confront him.
Good luck<33 |
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May 3 2005, 06:25 PM
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#4
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Senior Member Group: Member Posts: 42 Joined: Apr 2005 Member No: 121,112 |
i would confront my friend at once. i would be so hard on him. for him to rape a girl... its indescribable
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| *mzkandi* |
May 3 2005, 06:25 PM
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#5
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Guest |
I would go to the police with I suspect. They will have a better chance at determining whether or not he is guilty. You should not keep it to yourself, even if it means losing a friend.
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| *iNyCxShoRT* |
May 3 2005, 06:52 PM
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#6
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Guest |
don't confront him! he might attack you i suggest going to the police even if he is innocent you can never be so sure.
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May 3 2005, 07:14 PM
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#7
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 sweet but sour Group: Member Posts: 170 Joined: Jul 2004 Member No: 35,953 |
talk to him with someone else who is also close to both of you (preferabbly a guy or an adult and also let someone else know besides you three about the convo). don't let the others know you told someone else though, its for your own protection. some people are closer to others and you have no idea, so its better to play it safe. tell him how you feel and explain to him if he did do it, wha he did was wrong. don't bitch, just talk calmly. if he is a good person and did it, he should confess. if he doesnt dont bother to be his friend; although he is your best friend. do you want people to know you hang out with a rapist? he could end up raping you. who wants a friend that has done something that cruel? it isn't worth it, in the end. you'll feel different about him and your friendship. so, i don't see a point.
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May 3 2005, 07:20 PM
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#8
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 *scribble scribble* Group: Member Posts: 1,314 Joined: Mar 2005 Member No: 119,610 |
going to the police is that safest choice. make sure that the police does not give your name as the person who accused him because if he did do it but the police decides that hes innocent, then he might come after you. good luck.
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May 3 2005, 08:18 PM
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#9
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 You can't keep running from what you're trying to find. Group: Official Member Posts: 5,030 Joined: Oct 2004 Member No: 54,096 |
QUOTE(akinachan @ May 3 2005, 4:20 PM) going to the police is that safest choice. make sure that the police does not give your name as the person who accused him because if he did do it but the police decides that hes innocent, then he might come after you. good luck.  yup... ^ you can never be too sure 
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May 3 2005, 08:18 PM
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#10
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 Senior Member Group: Member Posts: 1,220 Joined: Jan 2005 Member No: 81,808 |
police! police! somebody call 911!!!
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May 3 2005, 09:15 PM
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#11
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 ticktock. Group: Member Posts: 1,138 Joined: Mar 2005 Member No: 118,235 |
i think you should report him. i mean he is a rapist after all. he could ruin many young girl's lives. even though he is your best friend, you cant let him do that
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May 3 2005, 09:57 PM
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#12
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 E=Fb Musicians Theory of Relativity Group: Member Posts: 711 Joined: Mar 2005 Member No: 109,045 |
I would get another friend to follow (in a discrete manner) so that you are no alone with the friend in question, and then confront them. Give them a chance, but if any doubt, even just a hint of suspicious remains in your mind I would suggest calling the authorities.
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May 4 2005, 08:17 AM
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#13
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 .bubblicious inspirations. @ www.bubbliciousoul.com Group: Member Posts: 466 Joined: Mar 2005 Member No: 112,228 |
hem... i suggest you confront your friend... but be very skillful with it and make sure u're in a safe environment... cuz if u go straight to the police, and if your friend turns out to be innocent.. u'd loose a friendship and not help.
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May 4 2005, 02:47 PM
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#14
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 Senior Member Group: Member Posts: 59 Joined: Apr 2005 Member No: 132,559 |
wow wat a deep subject......just cuz of who i was.........i dont think i would confront them......i would go to the police and tell them what is happening to the friend.....let them do the investigation.......if they dont find anything then kool it was just a coincidence.....
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May 4 2005, 03:55 PM
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#15
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 Perfectionist, Loner, Confident, Mysterious, Imperfect, Kevyn Group: Member Posts: 370 Joined: Apr 2004 Member No: 11,095 |
Report him...then kick his ass...then report him ^_^ I despise all people that do that...especially since the fact that it ruins so many people's lives...permanently. Friend or not...it doesn't matter. Rape is a zero tolerance policy on my list at least. Same goes for family member...or ANYONE for that matter.
-Kevyn |
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May 4 2005, 04:08 PM
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#16
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 Senior Member Group: Official Designer Posts: 4,591 Joined: Dec 2004 Member No: 77,305 |
Mine better not be a rapist.
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May 4 2005, 10:35 PM
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#17
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 Senior Member Group: Member Posts: 95 Joined: Apr 2005 Member No: 132,007 |
you should try and get some hard evidence to back up what you think. if you go to the police, they probably would want some real evidence rather than "i think my friend's a rapist." i'm sure they get enough of that.
you're in a tough one, babe :\ i would hate to be in that situation, where i'm the only person who knows and it's my own best friend. whatever you decide to do, be careful and discreet. i don't want to lose my favorite british acquaintance, you're my partner in crime! |
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May 5 2005, 01:26 AM
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#18
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I'm Cattt. :] Group: Validating Posts: 1,722 Joined: Apr 2005 Member No: 130,831 |
get the hell away from him and get him sum help.
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May 5 2005, 05:48 AM
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#19
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 yan lin♥ Group: Staff Alumni Posts: 14,129 Joined: Apr 2004 Member No: 13,627 |
it'd be hard decision, but in the end, i think i'd tell my counselor or something.
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May 5 2005, 07:20 AM
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#20
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 I can't believe its not "Ryan" Group: Member Posts: 1,981 Joined: Jun 2004 Member No: 21,368 |
You should go to the police. Just tell them his symtoms. Your not really telling on him, just wondering why hes acting like that.
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May 5 2005, 11:37 AM
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#21
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 The windmills of your mind .. Group: Member Posts: 1,317 Joined: Jan 2005 Member No: 83,699 |
I would just go to the police and just tell them, you think its him. I wouldnt want him raping other women.
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May 5 2005, 07:21 PM
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#22
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 Senior Member Group: Member Posts: 349 Joined: Apr 2005 Member No: 124,513 |
Report him anonomously, because you don't want him to hurt you, or any other girls, but be sure before you do anything, because he'll hate you forever if you accuse him of anything he didn't do....
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| *liquidize* |
May 5 2005, 10:04 PM
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#23
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Guest |
i'd stay loyal to my buddy.
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May 5 2005, 10:07 PM
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#24
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 Senior Member Group: Member Posts: 913 Joined: Feb 2005 Member No: 101,212 |
I would stay loyal to my friend.
I mean, friendships are based on trust, and I would have to trust my friend to not do something that stupid. If he did something wrong, he would tell me. So I would stay loyal to my friend... but keep on close watch of him. 
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May 6 2005, 08:51 AM
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#25
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 Grrrrrrr Group: Member Posts: 801 Joined: Apr 2005 Member No: 123,696 |
QUOTE(kyuubi319 @ May 3 2005, 5:18 PM) Damn. I suggest going to the police. It's better than having him attack another girl. Hell, it could be you if you confront him. Good luck<33 i agree |
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May 8 2005, 07:40 PM
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#26
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 Senior Member Group: Member Posts: 2,881 Joined: Apr 2005 Member No: 132,134 |
report him. even if he`s your best friend you shouldnt let this happen. Thats why i think you should report him; its because he IS your best firend you cant let him keep doing such things. you want the best for him and hte best for the other people. Thats why you should stop him.
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May 8 2005, 11:47 PM
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#27
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 Be yourself. Unless you suck Group: Member Posts: 135 Joined: Apr 2005 Member No: 129,315 |
Report him if you think there's enough against him. If you don't someone else could be attacked.
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May 9 2005, 02:45 PM
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#28
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 most definitely. Group: Member Posts: 284 Joined: Feb 2005 Member No: 103,416 |
I wouldn`t immediately jump to conclusions, be`cuz it could be somebody else, but i`d most definitely confront him and if you have to have back up just incase he tries to attack you. Be calm when you talk to him and don`t explode on him because he miqht get offensive.
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May 9 2005, 03:12 PM
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#29
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c[: Group: Member Posts: 2,302 Joined: Feb 2004 Member No: 2,876 |
shoo...i'de be scared to confront him...but i wouldnt immediately go to the popo's lols....even though i was scared...i would most likely confront him...i mean...he's your friend...and you should be able to talk to him about stuff like this...if you go to the popo's it might not even be him in the first place....wouldnt that be efft up that you ratted on your best friend and it wasnt even him to begin with? i would definately talk to him...and if he tries something on you...then snatch that freaking hammer out of his hand and freaking kick him in the nuggies and JET LIKE MADD!!!!!!!!!
 but maybe that's only what i would do.... 
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May 9 2005, 03:40 PM
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#30
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 ^-^ Group: Member Posts: 1,676 Joined: Feb 2005 Member No: 107,668 |
QUOTE(kyuubi319 @ May 3 2005, 3:18 PM) Damn. I suggest going to the police. It's better than having him attack another girl. Hell, it could be you if you confront him. Good luck<33 agreed 
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May 9 2005, 10:12 PM
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#31
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 when we speak, we breathe Group: Member Posts: 1,635 Joined: Jan 2005 Member No: 91,760 |
So, instead of looking a bit .. dumb as the others.
Was this thread hypothetical? Because from reading it, it's obvious you're not concerned, which leads me to believe you're just writing to put us in that situation to see what we'd do. |
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May 9 2005, 10:19 PM
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#32
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 THE EVERGLOW Group: Member Posts: 95 Joined: Mar 2005 Member No: 114,409 |
DO NOT TALK TO HIM. I REPEAT, DO NOT TALK TO HIM.
now he knows that you're suspicious, you're next on his list to go, girl. so go directly to the police. this is very important, BE ANONYMOUS. you don't want to f**k up your relationship with him if he's innocent, and if he's guilty.. just stay anonymous. it's better for everyone, esp. you. |
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May 10 2005, 08:45 AM
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#33
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hardbodyactiv...always so hard Group: Member Posts: 119 Joined: Apr 2005 Member No: 130,804 |
QUOTE(jordanriane @ May 10 2005, 4:12 AM) So, instead of looking a bit .. dumb as the others. Was this thread hypothetical? Because from reading it, it's obvious you're not concerned, which leads me to believe you're just writing to put us in that situation to see what we'd do. Well done. Yes, I put this thread up as a hypothetical situation, although that really should be obvious to everyone. As for not being concerned. Well it does concern me in as much as I want to provoke thoughtful and intelligent comments on what is a very serious subject, one that unfortunately at least one poster here may very well find themselves in @ some point in their teens or 20's, possibly 30's. Please continue to post on the thread and particularly if any have personal experience of this situation... Peace Out |
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May 19 2005, 05:28 PM
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#34
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Jessica Group: Member Posts: 480 Joined: Jul 2004 Member No: 29,118 |
I would confront my friend, and when I find proof, I'd take him to the cops.
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May 20 2005, 12:24 AM
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#35
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Senior Member Group: Member Posts: 35 Joined: Apr 2005 Member No: 128,697 |
i wouldlet da police deal with it
but ill also talk to him its also for his own good |
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May 20 2005, 10:39 AM
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#36
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STOP THE WAR Group: Member Posts: 298 Joined: Jan 2005 Member No: 92,182 |
report and beat da Fcuk out of him
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