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progression, power from pain...
*islandgirl4eva*
post Apr 19 2005, 11:06 PM
Post #1





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Feelings rise to the top,
Love fizzles and pops,
And then my heart stops.
My skin, it tingles,
As the tears drop in singles,
Panting from my chest,
Close my eyes to rest,
Because life is a climb,
We work all the time,
My heart still sings,
For wind in my wings,
To be able to fly,
And let my worries die,
I still wish for hope,
I'm bound in golden rope,
It keeps me together,
Always fairing rough weather,
Never taming my passion,
In any form or fashion,
Now I'm ready to go,
Just wanted you to know.
 
 
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*stephinika*
post Apr 19 2005, 11:07 PM
Post #2





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ooh, i quite like this actually. the rhyming scheme is incorporated well and so it flows rather nicely. great word choices too. i really, really like this. nicely done as usual. _smile.gif flowers.gif
 
RiddleMeWonders
post Apr 19 2005, 11:09 PM
Post #3


fell in love with a boy
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I love. Refreshing. Bravo.
 
HongKongDong
post Apr 20 2005, 04:28 AM
Post #4


Holla if ya hate me
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Awesome, I like this one as well. If worded correctly it could be a rap!! Ahhh thats just my random thought XD

I like the flow, the pace of it. I also like the message you were trying to convey, im not sure what im thinking is what you were trying to show but its all in how the reader interprets it right? _smile.gif
 
*nightmare4taki*
post Apr 20 2005, 02:18 PM
Post #5





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*claps* BRAVO! Keep up the good work.
 
*islandgirl4eva*
post Apr 20 2005, 09:15 PM
Post #6





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QUOTE(Funky Buddha @ Apr 20 2005, 4:28 AM)
Awesome, I like this one as well. If worded correctly it could be a rap!! Ahhh thats just my random thought XD

I like the flow, the pace of it. I also like the message you were trying to convey, im not sure what im thinking is what you were trying to show but its all in how the reader interprets it right? _smile.gif
*


I think any poetry is up for interpretation by the reader, but I was trying to convey a certain message.

I was hurt by a former love. I still hurt very much, but I'm tired of being stuck in that chasm of darkness and pain. I'm ready to move on.

Thank you everyone for your encouraging words.
 
gladz612
post Apr 21 2005, 11:38 AM
Post #7


.bubblicious inspirations. @ www.bubbliciousoul.com
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i love this one.
 

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