broken barbie |
| *islandgirl4eva* |
 Mar 17 2005, 03:54 PM
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#1
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I used to same rhyme scheme as always, but no worries, my recent works are beginning to digress from that.
Living in a doll house I'm quiet as a small mouse With the power you hold I do as I'm told Stiff in plastic My thoughts are spastic I spout poems and prose But nobody knows For the shame on my face I live in disgrace Do-up my hair Make it look like you care Parade me around Let them see what you've found I'm what you want me to be Just an image, you see No thoughts to speak My brain is weak I have no control For I sold you my soul To you, my dear maker Chronic heart breaker |
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Mar 17 2005, 06:52 PM
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#2
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 crushed.  Group: Staff Alumni Posts: 9,432 Joined: Jun 2004 Member No: 20,026 |
I like it..I can also relate to this one.
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Mar 17 2005, 06:57 PM
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#3
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 Lemme c ya 1, 2, Step! ;] Group: Member Posts: 84 Joined: Mar 2005 Member No: 113,865 |
I like it. It's Totally awesome! Great Job! :]
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Mar 17 2005, 08:08 PM
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#4
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alli Group: Member Posts: 513 Joined: Apr 2004 Member No: 10,108 |
yah its totalyy cool and true
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Mar 17 2005, 11:19 PM
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#5
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 durian Group: Staff Alumni Posts: 13,124 Joined: Feb 2004 Member No: 3,860 |
Stiff in plastic
My thoughts are spastic ^ Ooh I like that line! Just an image, you see No thoughts to speak ^ That one too! lol. Aww... There are girls/guys out there who significant others who just use them or treat them like they're just someone to show off. I love the words you used! Man, I'm so bad at rhyming lol! I like how you used words that aren't frequently used. I see many of the same words said over and over again in various poems, so I like your originality 
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| *stephinika* |
Mar 18 2005, 02:36 AM
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#6
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very well written...absolutely lovely. great job naomi! great concept/meaning too!
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