hm. old things are coming back up, i'm scared again Options

[perfectxflaw23]

I know it's going to seem a little out of place, being that I haven't really seen anyone on here who has the same problems as me, but whatever I can say something.

My life just seems weird again. I used to cut, was strong for 8 months.. and I broke again yesterday. I just feel so weak for giving in. I did it because I can't let the past go. Things have happened, my dad was abusive, and my virginity was taken away from me (not by him). I just can't let it all go. I was getting really upset over what my dad has emotionally been putting my brother through. My brother used to get 100s, but now that my dad is working out of town and barely talking to him, he gets 30s. I'm fine with him being gone, but I'm so worried about my family. I'm so scared that what my dad has done to us is irreversable.

Anyway, I just wanted to get a few things out. Any advice? You can also post about anything that's bothering you, too.

[topsyturvy]

I can't understand how people think cutting will solve their problems..

If you wanted to kill yourself, why not do it in one gunshot, instead of slowly waiting for your blood to run out? If suicide isn't the purpose behind cutting, what is the purpose of cutting??

I suggest you talk to your brother. Tell him how important his grades are to him. Tell him how he won't make it to college if he keeps this up.

If your dad was abusive, you should have reported him..

I hope things start looking up soon. I really can't stand it when I see someone's life falling apart and I'm totally helpless. T_T

[EmmalieV]

cutting doesnt help it wotn magically make eveything go away..

be strong theres people in this world that love you , dont let your life go to waste.

Hold on.

[perfectxflaw23]

I can't understand how people think cutting will solve their problems..

If you wanted to kill yourself, why not do it in one gunshot, instead of slowly waiting for your blood to run out?  If suicide isn't the purpose behind cutting, what is the purpose of cutting??

I suggest you talk to your brother.  Tell him how important his grades are to him.  Tell him how he won't make it to college if he keeps this up.

If your dad was abusive, you should have reported him..

I hope things start looking up soon. I really can't stand it when I see someone's life falling apart and I'm totally helpless.  T_T

I'll clear some things up.
Cutting won't solve problems, I know that. It's an addiction. I knew it would never solve my problems, but it helped me cope with them. It's not something I'm doing for suicide. It just help me deal with my issues. I'm not one of those girls who just does it. I have been diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder. I'll always have this issue, all I can do is try to manage it.

My brother is 8. It's not his fault he's doing bad. It's my father's. My brother spends his entire evening studying and writing. He has no learning disabilities. On the weeks my dad is home, my brother does amazing.

He was reported. When I was nine, he would hit my mother a lot. He was reported and could not even SEE my mother for a whole year. Or us (my brother and I). And then my mom let him back, because she lets people walk all over her. He was then reported Memorial Day either 2 or 3 years ago. For hitting me. My mom let him back, and all he got was probation.

I'm not so sure if there is any advice that can be given, now that I think about it. I guess I just needed to vent. Again, if you have any.. please.

[jordanriane]

Hey, hun, what you need to do, is find a hobby. Whenever you get the urge to run back to what you did in your past, start working up at your hobby.

Start designing websites, putting stencils on shirts (Stencilry, make a fansite for your favorite band (and keep it updated with the latest news/photos/mp3s/etc!), learn how to knit, or read books (make a list of books you want to read, and finish the list off!)

As far as your brother goes, he's young and very impressionable. Whenever your dad leaves, be there for him. Play videogames with him, or play his favorite activity (my little sister's always loved playing school for some reason), and help him with his work.. Just give him that little nudge of encouragement that he's loved, whether or not his father is home.

About your virginty being taken away, I'm not sure how to help you out with that, but if.. well, you're implying rape, I highly suggest reading Lucky by Alice Sebold. Maybe, what you could do, is start writing your own personal book about your problems, what you're going through, and just let your emotions flow through.

Hope some of that helped.

[jordanriane]

I can't understand how people think cutting will solve their problems..

If you wanted to kill yourself, why not do it in one gunshot, instead of slowly waiting for your blood to run out?  If suicide isn't the purpose behind cutting, what is the purpose of cutting??

I suggest you talk to your brother.  Tell him how important his grades are to him.  Tell him how he won't make it to college if he keeps this up.

Cutting does not always imply suicide. There are people out there who are comforated by the mere thought of cutting theirself. It's hard to understand when you don't do it yourself. Granted, I seem to grasp knowledge of it, but that doesn't mean I've done it before.

And saying "why not do it in one gunshot," was horribly rude and inconsiderate. She's asking for our help, and obviously wants it. Why the HELL would you imply she could've ended her life quickly by using some other method? Then again, you're probably under the age of fifteen, and really naive, but still.

And honestly, you do NOT talk negative to someone when trying to help them out with something. If I wanted you to do better in school, would you want to hear "you won't make it to college if you keep this up?" I mean, how is that supposed to encourage you to do better?

[Litt0_TeeZy]

I know it's going to seem a little out of place, being that I haven't really seen anyone on here who has the same problems as me, but whatever I can say something.

My life just seems weird again. I used to cut, was strong for 8 months.. and I broke again yesterday. I just feel so weak for giving in. I did it because I can't let the past go. Things have happened, my dad was abusive, and my virginity was taken away from me (not by him). I just can't let it all go. I was getting really upset over what my dad has emotionally been putting my brother through. My brother used to get 100s, but now that my dad is working out of town and barely talking to him, he gets 30s. I'm fine with him being gone, but I'm so worried about my family. I'm so scared that what my dad has done to us is irreversable.

Anyway, I just wanted to get a few things out. Any advice? You can also post about anything that's bothering you, too.

wow. i think i might know how you feel. my dad would always verbally abuse me and my siblings. the only one he didn't do anything to is my oldest sister. i guess she's his favorite, but i use to cut too and a few weeks ago i let in like you did. sometimes we have to realize life gives us minor set backs. so just ride over that bumpy road and maybe talk to a professional about this stuff. i know what you mean about the whole not letting the past go...i have a hard time doing that either. my dad is currently in iraq working with halliburton (sp?) but you know what? honestly...i miss part of him, but part of me is happy he's not here to verbally abuse me anymore. my heart is full of scars from that and it's hard explaining it to friends..i know it is. so i guess you have to find people with similar problems and you work them out together. for your brother...maybe YOU can try being there for him like your father was? sometimes a brother only needs his sister...i've learned that with my brothers. hope this helped..maybe a litt0?

[aznraver396]

yawn..people letting out their problems for..what? other people to listen?..putting a burden on other people although it's simply useless?
anyways, yah, cutting doesn't help. i used to. stopped. i know i'm never going to get over my past but it's not going to stop me from living the future, ya know?

"Forget about the past, live in the present, and wish for a brighter future..."

[DORKalicious]

Is there anyway you can get some counsoling for you and your brother, maybe someone at school you can talk to like a guidance consoler?
Remember that what your doing now will not solve your problems,but if anything make them worse. Try to have a more postitive out look on life even during times when it seems really hard.good luck & I hope everything will turn out ok

[swe3ttemptasian]

yawn..people letting out their problems for..what? other people to listen?..putting a burden on other people although it's simply useless?
anyways, yah, cutting doesn't help. i used to. stopped. i know i'm never going to get over my past but it's not going to stop me from living the future, ya know?

"Forget about the past, live in the present, and wish for a brighter future..."

Well if you didn't really want to hear about people's problems then why read it?

& it bothers me when people are always like... stop complaining, live your life and go on. It helps to vent it all out and I think you should try to have some kinda family counseling or something? Or at least have someone to talk to. And I think you should talk to your mom about not letting your dad walk all over her..

[to-devastate]

i want to cut myself too. but i know that it won't make the pain go away.
Cutting yourself isn't going to make the pain go; it just brings even more. You could just talk to someone who understands. Or just start a diary. It definetly feels better after getting it off your chest.

[cRaZiiXbEauTiFul]

yawn..people letting out their problems for..what? other people to listen?..putting a burden on other people although it's simply useless?

thats really harsh... anwayz, i agree with jordanriane..find a hobby and whenever you feel stressed or something, instead of cutting, update whatever your hobby is.

working out when your stressed or angry also helps...

[jordanriane]

yawn..people letting out their problems for..what? other people to listen?..putting a burden on other people although it's simply useless?
anyways, yah, cutting doesn't help. i used to. stopped. i know i'm never going to get over my past but it's not going to stop me from living the future, ya know?

"Forget about the past, live in the present, and wish for a brighter future..."

She was looking for help. She did the right thing by looking for people to help her, give her advice. Take the cliche advice: If you have nothing nice to say, don't say anything at all.

[cHuNsAbAbIe012]

i dont know if this is much help but wen there is no one else n nothing else i can turn to i usually turn to the one person who i know is always there. Jesus Christ. i dont know if ur Christian or not but even if ur Muslim or Jew or watever else...try turning to your God or superior being. i feel so at peace n loved whenever i turn to Him. even tho i know He should b the first person i turn to i always use Him as a last resort because im so selfish n i always try to do things the hard way. if u ever need someone to talk to u can go to my xanga it's mah_behb_andrew. maybe we can talk...

[Shattered_Hope]

Talk to your brother or get him help....either from a counselor or someone you look up to. Cutting doesn't solve your problems.....it's only an escape when you feel like giving up and you can't handle it anymore. Just find someone who is willing and wanting to help you, listen to you, and be there for you. Or..find something else to occupy yourself with....or something to concentrate on....

[angel-roh]

You mean 100's as a dollar sign? Anyways, that sucks that is happening again. I wouldn't like if that happens. I'm glad it didn't happened to me yet. But don't cut, it's not a healthy for you and you know that too. Your topic is so depressing, I'm just speechless pretty much.