sex: something i noticed, yeah... Options

[expoised]

i just noticed this a few times in this forum...

a girl asks for help because she might be pregnant or a girl is regretting the fact that she's had sex and she thinks she wasn't ready...and things such as that.

and most of our responses are

"omg, how OLD are you?"
"it's your fault"
"you shouldnt have sex until you're ready"
"face your consequences"

and other things like that...

you know, if i thought i was pregnant and wanted help, so i posted up a topic here on CB, i wouldnt want lectures like "you're too young" "it's your own fault".

goddamn, people. can you show any compassion? maybe give the girls what they're looking for.. which is HELP? i'm sure she doesn't wanna hear that what she did was a mistake; she probably KNOWS that already, or she wouldnt be worried.

i might be going of on a limb here, but really guys. don't add to the pressure. sure, sex is a big issue, but what's done is done. so stop telling her she shouldn't have done it.

(this is referring to all the sex topics i've seen, btw)

[flyonthewall4590]

well, personally, i've never replyed to those topics because i can't say anything that would help the person...unless they think that they have gotten pregnat in some strange way...i really don't wanna hurt anyone's feelings...

[lovescream]

All I said was go see a doctor.

But I totally agree. I wouldn't want people saying that I'm too young to have sex or.. you shouldn't have done it anyway. I'd get annoyed.

[177emories]

what your saying is so true... but they shoudl expect that kidna stuff if they post here... not everyone here knows stuff about sex you know

[gigiopolis]

Some of the people on cB get tired of it. Not that we don't realize it's a traumatizing event, it's just...repetitive. I think most of us have sympathy, but we're just annoyed that there are so many topics on it.

A lot of these questions are asked, and the answers are the same. I, for one, feel much compassion for these people, but it's just repetitive, so I think a lot of people get PO'ed and retort rude comments back.

=\

[aznangel4eva]

I noticed that too...n' up till a couple of months ago...I would have given the same lecture...until I realized how easy it is to get caught up n' give in..and if that person were me...I'd want help from cb...n' compassion...they already know the truth...they don't need to be told it again

[bad_girl]

that's true. but u sorta have to face the concequences of posting something like that in cB..

[Nicolatofu]

I try to be supportive.... I don't think I've ever really lectured them. However, they do need to know that those are their consequences, but I try to help them deal with it.

[iheartsimba]

i know..its really sad what they have to go through and they probably get enough lecturing from their parents.

[cRaZiiXbEauTiFul]

yes...anywayz, lecturing isnt gonna change what they did...help can at least help fix the problem...

[youdrivinmegrape...]

What other help can be given? They're the irresponsible person who went ahead and did that knowing the consequences. If there's consequences you don't want to fake, then you shouldn't take that risk. I mean what are we supposed to do turn back time for her or zap away her problems? They got themselves into the problem fully knowing the risks. It's their fault simple as that

[shortiiex]

i never say stuff like that......but in CB you're suppose to say whatever your mind tells you

[Shattered_Hope]

first off....I dont lecture them. I give them advice[ what they're looking for] on what to do...

[lilJdawg]

first off....I dont lecture them. I give them advice[ what they're looking for] on what to do...

^ i agree with you. thanks for making this topic?

[gnawxela]

i agree too, but its kinda like...if you dont warn them than they might do it again you know?
i give advice but i also give warnings...its just "for their own good"
i know thats REALLY cliche but still

[*xcaitlinx*]

i think that if you can't help the person with their problem...then you shouldn't post anything at all.

[aznxdreamer]

we're tired of so many people posting threads on how their pregnate and omg, dont know what to do!! deal with it girls! its your own fault! face the consequences!

how old are you?

[krzykhmaigrl]

thank you... i asked for help and thats wut happened to me...i notice you added a nice reply so thanx...ur the best...btw im not

[whywasisostupid]

why melissa, u r brilliant.
haha ITS YOUR FAULT.

[maia_dc]

Yeah, I know what you mean. People can be really obnoxious with their "advice" sometimes.

[lovescream]

I KNOW I KNOW I KNOW!!!

Post a pinned topic about SEX.
All sex questions go over there.
Questions are answered and asked, then edited in the first post with the question & answer, then the question and answer is deleted. How bout that?

[Gypsy Eyes]

What other help can be given? They're the irresponsible person who went ahead and did that knowing the consequences. If there's consequences you don't want to fake, then you shouldn't take that risk. I mean what are we supposed to do turn back time for her or zap away her problems? They got themselves into the problem fully knowing the risks. It's their fault simple as that  

This is exactly what she is trying to say. i know how it feels, it's not fun to be lectured when you are looking for help

[*stephinika*]

^^

she has a point. i try not to lecture but its hard not to when the person asking for advice seems really immature...it depends how the person comes across when asking for advice. but yeah i agree with jackie...

[expoised]

we're tired of so many people posting threads on how their pregnate and omg, dont know what to do!! deal with it girls! its your own fault! face the consequences!

how old are you?

you seem like you're speaking for the entire CB community. are you?

are you tired of people posting threads about how they're pregnant? how about you just.. don't click on them? this is a forum... over time, topics WILL get repeated. i guess it's something you'll have to deal with.

and i'm 16, thanks for asking. even though i have no clue what that has anything to do with anything.

[you suck]

word. lol ppl r retarded and they just make the other person feel like shit. that aint right, they came here for help, not critiscism

[oiograceoio]

hmm.. i think its a sensitive issue.. and should be dealt with carefully..
i mean.. both can argue their point..
yes.. they need the comforting and good advice, while also realizing that they did make a mistake and should learn from it..
i think that both parties are making their own points..
and well... those who are pregnant should listen to both!


gRaCe~!

[iheartjohn]

The only thing people want when they have a tough issue to face is support...

[*x____duckii*]

Well, I'm not giving anyone any pity just because they're pregnant or whatever.

I don't give a f**k about what the person wants to hear. I don't give two shits if I sound harsh or not.

I know the person knows that they made a mistake, but what's wrong with telling them what you think? The person posted the topic because they wanted opinions or whatever. Nothing can really be done, except, well, take some birth control pills, or whatever. The person should've been aware that this could've happened. Once you have sex, you should know that you can risk getting pregnant, get STDs, or whatever.

[cewinee]

i've never posted a lecture i always want to be supportive no matter wat the situation.. thats the main reason i signed up for createblog.. when i noticed that ppl's responses were so cold like that i was like omfg wth is this? i mean fine i understand their opinions but if ur gona say sth that u know will upset the other even more then DONT SAY IT.. geez.. ur jus makin it f*cking worse for them.
ever since i noticed those kinda replies ive been thinking of writing a topic like you did but you'd said it better than me so good job for posting that topic man :)
as for the rest of you who DO lecture or say unhelpful sh*t to someone whose expecting nothing but HELP - think before you speak..
oh and if you DO have an opinion that involves having the person realize that its sth really bad he/she's put herself into, say it NICELY, SUPPORTIVE..
thanks..

[topsyturvy]

Well, I'm not giving anyone any pity just because they're pregnant or whatever.

the person posted the topic for help, not pity. they don't need your pity.

I don't give a f**k about what the person wants to hear. I don't give two shits if I sound harsh or not.

of course you don't give two shits or no shit. it's not you who's gonna refer to your comment and think, "god, she's bitching on and on about this being my fault. gee, i know that."

I know the person knows that they made a mistake, but what's wrong with telling them what you think?

good lord, they don't care what you think about the situation. they're asking for help, not your thoughts.

oh and if you DO have an opinion that involves having the person realize that its sth really bad he/she's put herself into, say it NICELY, SUPPORTIVE..

thank you. my thoughts exactly.

[iheartjohn]

Well, I'm not giving anyone any pity just because they're pregnant or whatever.

I don't give a f**k about what the person wants to hear. I don't give two shits if I sound harsh or not.

FIRST OF ALL, they don't need your pity. And second off, some girls get pregnant because they were RAPED.

[*x____duckii*]

the person posted the topic for help, not pity.  they don't need your pity.

Okay. Then they don't need it. Whatever.

of course you don't give two shits or no shit.  it's not you who's gonna refer to your comment and think, "god, she's bitching on and on about this being my fault.  gee, i know that."

I don't give a f**k if they think I'm bitching about something being their fault. They already should know that it's their fault, but they're also the irresponsible person and I can tell them that for whenever I want to.

good lord, they don't care what you think about the situation.  they're asking for help, not your thoughts.

My thoughts exactly? I don't care what they're asking for.

They should know that if you have sex, you can get pregnant or whatever. If they're not old enough to face the consequences, then might as well not have sex at all. If someone does something, they should know what they're doing, and the consequences of what they're doing. They shouldn't do something that they'll regret. And really, I'm just sick and tired of seeing all of these "OMG! I'M PREGNANT! HELP MEH!" topics.

[expoised]

Well, I'm not giving anyone any pity just because they're pregnant or whatever.

I don't give a f**k about what the person wants to hear. I don't give two shits if I sound harsh or not.

I know the person knows that they made a mistake, but what's wrong with telling them what you think? The person posted the topic because they wanted opinions or whatever. Nothing can really be done, except, well, take some birth control pills, or whatever. The person should've been aware that this could've happened. Once you have sex, you should know that you can risk getting pregnant, get STDs, or whatever.

they weren't asking for pity...

and also, they DIDNT ask for your opinions and they dont wanna know what you think. if you actually read the topic, they ask for help. they dont go "omg, i'm pregnant. what do you think?"

so actually, they dont give two shits whether you think this or that. they asked for help.

and as i said... if you dont like topics like those, just dont click a topic if it mentions "sex" or "pregnant" or "baby".

btw. its a great thing you don't care about what people want to hear. then you wont wonder why people think you're a bitch.

[blah1234567]

i reply to those topics sometimes but not all the time coz well i think they are pointless...but then again thats just my view..