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I need help., For all who can help pls reply.
JasonAkAWolf
post Oct 13 2004, 11:37 PM
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Hey everyone as most of you know I'm a daddy...but I have been for awhile but...The thing is...I still have really strong feelings for her mother, but the problem is..She has a big disturst in me cause of a past drug problem...We both had it..and We've both had rehab..and that junk, but the reason I don't get to see my lil girl as much as I like is cause of it all...and I really wanna be apart of her life....cause their is a new guy in her life and I don't want him to take the role as the father....cause you guys know I want my lil girl...she is really all I got...and She is the reason I go on day by day.

but what I need help with is....if their is any that can help...How do I make sure that I'm her only father and that this other guy doesn't take my spot in her life...I really don't want to lose her cause If I did I probly go right back into my old habits and I really don't want to hit that low agian.



well thanks for your time for anyone that read this.
 
 
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whomps
post Oct 13 2004, 11:52 PM
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Maybe you can talk to her mother? Like tell her you want to play the role as the father.. and blah blah blah..
 
addictedtoxangie
post Oct 13 2004, 11:56 PM
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you should talk to the mother about how you want to see ure lil girl as much as a father should. if she really cares, she'll say yes. this way you'll be with her a lot and the new guy wont take the father spot.
 
JasonAkAWolf
post Oct 14 2004, 12:26 AM
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QUOTE(addictedtoxangie @ Oct 13 2004, 11:56 PM)
you should talk to the mother about how you want to see ure lil girl as much as a father should. if she really cares, she'll say yes. this way you'll be with her a lot and the new guy wont take the father spot.

I'll call her tomorrow and see if I can come over so I can try and talk it out..I really hope she will hear me out and not shut me out like she has done before.
 
TheSilenceInDict...
post Oct 14 2004, 01:28 AM
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Explain to her that it wouldn't be fair to your daughter if she didn't have her real father in her life.

My real dad was out of my life for a long time, mostly because my mom wanted him to stay away from me. I grew up with certain questions in my head like...Am I not good enough that he wouldn't come visit? Is he that bad of a person? I ended up resenting someone I didn't even know. And yes, I have a step-father, so that situation you described above is quite familiar.

Trust me, for the good of your daughter, the fact that your role as a father being important should be mutually acknowledged, between you and your daughters mother.
 
JasonAkAWolf
post Oct 14 2004, 01:58 AM
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QUOTE(MasteRxKiD @ Oct 14 2004, 1:28 AM)
Explain to her that it wouldn't be fair to your daughter if she didn't have her real father in her life.

My real dad was out of my life for a long time, mostly because my mom wanted him to stay away from me. I grew up with certain questions in my head like...Am I not good enough that he wouldn't come visit? Is he that bad of a person? I ended up resenting someone I didn't even know. And yes, I have a step-father, so that situation you described above is quite familiar.

Trust me, for the good of your daughter, the fact that your role as a father being important should be mutually acknowledged, between you and your daughters mother.

yaya! your the type of person I wanted to talk to cuase you understand it.....if we can chat more I would really like that...I don't know much about the not having a dad in my life cause I had my dad even tho my parents were seapered....but if we can talk on AIM or PM me on here...I would really be greatful if I can ask you a few questions.
 
TheSilenceInDict...
post Oct 14 2004, 02:21 AM
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Sure thing man.
I'd be more than glad to help you out or just talk.

AIM - MasteRxxKiD

Oh, you live in Ontario...I have family up there.
I'm down here, an hour away in Los Angeles.
 
DrEaMgUy2K1
post Oct 14 2004, 02:22 AM
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QUOTE(MasteRxKiD @ Oct 13 2004, 10:28 PM)
Explain to her that it wouldn't be fair to your daughter if she didn't have her real father in her life.

My real dad was out of my life for a long time, mostly because my mom wanted him to stay away from me. I grew up with certain questions in my head like...Am I not good enough that he wouldn't come visit? Is he that bad of a person? I ended up resenting someone I didn't even know. And yes, I have a step-father, so that situation you described above is quite familiar.

Trust me, for the good of your daughter, the fact that your role as a father being important should be mutually acknowledged, between you and your daughters mother.

yea joemar's reply should help....

Honestly i dont think u should listen to most of the people who reply in this thread because well..they arent even legal to vote let alone give advice on parenting....

I suggest u talk to the mother,convince her why u should be a part of your daughters life, and if she is so stubborn that she doesnt want to give u a chance, but u absolutely want to be in your daughters life, hire a lawyer and try to get part time custody of ur daughter or something..... [ just a suggestion ] im not a father and i dont have a kid and never been in this situation b4...so yea my suggestion is almost worthless basically.
 
JasonAkAWolf
post Oct 14 2004, 11:33 AM
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QUOTE(DrEaMgUy2K1 @ Oct 14 2004, 2:22 AM)
yea joemar's reply should help....

Honestly i dont think u should listen to most of the people who reply in this thread because well..they arent even legal to vote let alone give advice on parenting....

I suggest u talk to the mother,convince her why u should be a part of your daughters life, and if she is so stubborn that she doesnt want to give u a chance, but u absolutely want to be in your daughters life, hire a lawyer and try to get part time custody of ur daughter or something..... [ just a suggestion ] im not a father and i dont have a kid and never been in this situation b4...so yea my suggestion is almost worthless basically.

well of course but I need to get some views from him....and I believe he can answer them ;D
 
TheSilenceInDict...
post Oct 14 2004, 01:43 PM
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QUOTE(MasteRxKiD @ Oct 13 2004, 11:21 PM)
Sure thing man.
I'd be more than glad to help you out or just talk.

AIM - MasteRxxKiD

Oh, you live in Ontario...I have family up there.
I'm down here, an hour away in Los Angeles.

Anytime you need me, I'm here man.
Just IM or PM me.

And Vinh, your advice isn't worthless...you make a good point, when it comes to his daughter, there is a legal aspect where Jason has rights.
 
Nicolatofu
post Oct 14 2004, 01:48 PM
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Hey well i see you already got a lot of good advice, but my brother is going through the same thing with his little girl, because of his past in drinking. But the mother doesn't want him to see his baby girl, even though he would give his life for her, and is the most responsible person ever. But if you want to try and claim the mother's heart again, show her you've changed, and how much you care for the baby. Like someone said up there^^ call and talk, maybe all do something together so you can get the chance to show her how good you are with your daughter. Hope this helps _smile.gif
 
JasonAkAWolf
post Oct 14 2004, 03:14 PM
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QUOTE(MasteRxKiD @ Oct 14 2004, 1:43 PM)
Anytime you need me, I'm here man.
Just IM or PM me.

And Vinh, your advice isn't worthless...you make a good point, when it comes to his daughter, there is a legal aspect where Jason has rights.

well see about the legal part their is a big down side to going to a judge...my lawyer agrees' with me...cause if the court finds that I'm an unstable father....I wont be able to see her every agian...I just barely got her back I don't want to lose her agian...she means too much to me to just lose her agian...you know?


and thanks agian people ;D
 
Too Asian To DIE
post Oct 14 2004, 04:04 PM
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we r all here for u to save ur back
 
TheSilenceInDict...
post Oct 14 2004, 04:35 PM
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QUOTE(JasonAkAWolf @ Oct 14 2004, 12:14 PM)
well see about the legal part their is a big down side to going to a judge...my lawyer agrees' with me...cause if the court finds that I'm an unstable father....I wont be able to see her every agian...I just barely got her back I don't want to lose her agian...she means too much to me to just lose her agian...you know?


and thanks agian people ;D

An unstable father? In terms of you getting out of rehab?
Now, correct if I'm wrong, but didn't your daughters mother just get out of rehab as well?
Trust me, if you show that you're cleaning up your act and that you're fixing your life accordingly, the judge will deem you responsible enough to care for your daughter.
 
JasonAkAWolf
post Oct 14 2004, 04:44 PM
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yeah...thats true but I still have other issues I need to deal with.
 
TheSilenceInDict...
post Oct 14 2004, 04:47 PM
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As long as you're able to overcome them, be stable and responsible enough to care for your daughter, then you should be fine.
 
JasonAkAWolf
post Oct 14 2004, 04:49 PM
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yeah I know but in the courts eyes its something always different turst me I've been talking to my lawyer and he keeps telling me...I might need to check into therpy...which I'm going to do cause atleast it will show I'm trying to fix myself..and I will need to take a durg test at any random time to show that I've been clean.
 
jennyjenny
post Oct 14 2004, 08:42 PM
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Lay down the law.

Go " _____ (insert mother's name here), we have to talk. I don't want some stranger taking the place of MY baby. The baby that me and you created. We were both on drug problems and you get her? She's mine, too. "

or something like that happy.gif

Good luck.
 

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