comebacks, show em off.. lol Options

[jnukes]

so what comebacks do you use when someone makes fun of you? or when you make fun of someone else?

well tha only one i can think of now is if you're dissin someone with curly hair, say "you're as striaght as your hair" (meaning, they're gay cause their hair isn't striaght) blah , i was bored

[inthemudhole]

"Go buy a house!" and "get in my soup."
No, really.
Once someone said that to me.. and I in return made screen-names of them, haha.

Err, comebacks.. hmm...
I'm pretty good with comebacks, but as of right now.. I'm drawing a blank. T_T Rawr.

[*stephinika*]

mm yeah i have no specific ones...the only ones i can think of are really lame haha but if i got shot at with a comment, i can usually return a comeback pretty quickly. but on the spot? its kinda hard...

[DaTru KataLYST]

i am rubber, you are glue! w.e you say bounces off me and sticks to you!! XD

umm...


sit the fcuk down and shut the fcuk up. =)

[JustPeachy]

go practis safe sex and skrew yourself
eh i have more but i can't think of um right now

[juliar]

...shut up.
kinda like this online.
LOSER: DUde, you suck!
Me: shut up.
LOSER: HAHAH YOU HAVE NO COMEBACK
Me: shu tup.
LOSER: OH YOURE A LAMER!
Me: shut up
LOSER: YOURE f*cking BORING!!
Me: =) shut up.
[loser has signed off at 6:12:42 pm]

or this.
LOSER: YOU SUCK!
Me: yeah. but you suck condiments i shall not speak of.

[DrEaMgUy2K1]

i either just cut them off and say your mom or yo momma..that works...

and smetimes i say "well your moms a cow" haha... well.. i can be more insulting and such but i keep it simple when i can ;]

[Heathasm]

depends on the situation...if some one openly insults me on some thing im usually alot smarter than them and can make them look and feel like an idiot lol...haha if its too dumb to fathom i just say "b*tch, please."

[magnificentmike]

I like the YO FACE one. haha its kinda popular at my school..
example: "ew your project is ugly" "YO FACE IS UGLY!"
haha yeah..gay..

[mouse_3k]

"ur mom..."
"shut up and make me a cake"

[sweetdreamsx3]

Yeah, like the above person said, I can't think of anything right now, but when you start dissing me or talking smack, I can pretty much make you feel stupid by just one simple comment. :D

-liinda

[jnukes]

ah i just remembered one

*other person making fun of me in a really grumpy/mad/outraged voice*

me - "geez, someone woke up on tha wrong side of tha cardboard box!"

[*RiC3xBoy*]

"ur mom.....both of em"

it usually pisses em off though

[Spirited Away]

I'm not very good with come backs ... except when the person really deserves it.

[ryfitaDF]

example:

antagonist (to me): faggot
my friend (to me): are you gunna take that?
me: concider the source. moving on.

"k" is a pretty good brick wall they can run into, too.

[magnificentmike]

lol when someones grumpy and takes their anger out on other people and i either go up to them and ask them if they need a nap just to piss them off or say out loud so everyone to hear "looks like someone had a bowl o' b!tch flakes this morning"

[shawty_redd]

i don't really have a set of comebacks that i use
it depends on the situation. but i have a quick mind so i usually come up with good ones unless i'm having a really bad day then i might fight them but that has only happened about 3 times.

[NgocQuyen]

i either just cut them off and say your mom or yo momma..that works...

and smetimes i say "well your moms a cow" haha... well.. i can be more insulting and such but i keep it simple when i can ;]

ah ha...i do that soemtimes....or i just go.....yur face!!!or.....yur friggen toe!!...orr.....yur face is a [wutever they called you] x] hahahaha....or i just pure cuss dem out when i get real ticked...x]

[highly_evolved]

i suck at combacks im jst like "oo yae well...shut up!"

[magnificentmike]

lol, theres this kid who says that to me and i always make him embarrassed when i say something to him..

[*lolita kitty*]

eh
it depepends on the insult they say

[someflipguy]

Lets try this!

Person doing the making fun of: Your a ^%&*%$&*%
Me: *Punches him in the face*

haha...okay sorry that wasn't a come back but it stopped the arguement!

Right?

[TheSilenceInDict...]

I'm really good on my feet, So I respond accordingly.

I like to stay on top and show them just how ignorant they are.

[*hcosurfkid*]

Umm i say harsh things.. Like
-Go fcuk ur Momma
-u $lut
-shut the fcuk up you h0e
-Tell ur momma to stop using lipstick cuase my dik is turnen into a rainbow..B!tcH
-Urr momma is like papa ginos, after 30 mins she is free.
-(to a girl) you have been slammed more times then a door
or the orignials
-fcuk off
-a$$ hole
-stupid b!tch
And so on .. lol.. I dont have to use these a lot tho.. Iny wen im about to fcuk up a kid in skool..

[*tweeak*]

YOUR MOM

[nyctophiliac]

haha i never use
comebacks i just
say shut the fcuk/
hell up b!tch! lol

[mony0407]

guy#1: says stupid comeback
guy#2: if i wanted a comeback i'd wipe it off your chin

[[ haha that one always gets me!! its so funny! okie doke.. later ]]

[acidbreeze]

I love them right back.
A lot of people call me a fag, I say Spiderman has made gay. They have no clue what that means, so then I take my tutu off.

///CB- Most of your comebacks suck.

I'll just prove their ignorance.

[redpeony]

"ur mom.....both of em"

it usually pisses em off though

haha, i like that.

[angel-roh]

ehh i dont know usually i stay quietly haha

[vivieeeen]

hm... i just act nice
and say..... oh really? xxxx you too!

like he had told me happy birthday

[sheepy]

umms.. i usually say some mean stuff but right now im trying to love everyone. so i just compliment dem, or say how much i love them. it usually gets to dem hehe

[aznxdreamer]

your face
your mom
your grandma
your great grandma
i know you are but what am i?
what? im sorry I didnt hear you. what? what? can you repeat that? what??
*looks at them blankly* im sorry but i dont know what your saying
Do i know you?
*looks at them* okay then
*pat on head*

or i always do this: (in many diffrent forms. trust me it pisses people off)
your stupid
what?? your mom is stupid
no i said your stupid
oooo, your stupid
no i said your stupid
i know your stupid
stop doing that
your doing who?
shut up
you f*ck ducks?
thats gay
you cant get laid?

and then they usually go away

[whywasisostupid]

hold three fingers up and say "read between the lines b*tch" and flick them off.

or w/e i feel like it

[LittleLulu]

when sm1 says "eff u"...which i dont get that often hahaha

i jus say" well jeez u knoe i WUD but its physically impossible to screw urself"

[LadyXTor]

I know what you are but what am i? I usually get slapped everytime i say that...

[ikayto]

i just stare off and say after they're done, "you say something?"

[ashesinthefall]

on time this chick asked if i had my green card with me and i asked her if she had her white hood with her

[Auktane]

get in line bitch...nothin special...

[*autumn.*]

"you suck/you blow"

only after dinner, bitch.

[Yemmerz]

*rude comment*

Um..yeah, but anyways, can you PLEASE remind you mom that I like extra bbq sauce and ketchup with my fries.

[xheartbreaker]

i either just cut them off and say your mom or yo momma..that works...

and smetimes i say "well your moms a cow" haha... well.. i can be more insulting and such but i keep it simple when i can ;]

Haha it's so hilarious because at our school, the main insult is 'yo mama' ... and it just so happens my bestfriend's mom is dead..so whenever someone says that to her, they get a slapp in the face...it's rather entertaining, really.

[avsugarhigh09]

your mom goes to college...

well at least i didn't pee my pants yesterday

take that back sir

you are bizarre [shakes head]

i beg to differ

[*wind&fire*]

hahah this happened to me two weeks ago....

guy: i would die if you didnt go out with me....
me: you promise?

[sporadic]

"Go away before I castrate you."

[MizKhmerShi]

If sumoen was about to critize meeh and say that sht in front of mia face and think i am too shy to say a word uhh hell nah

I jus told dem:

Bitch wtf? U have Add kuz i see sum reactions

Fuk off I don't friggin care?

the hell yor prob say that to mai face again

Flick dem off (alwaiz pisses their A@@)

or jus act nuttin wrong and I say "What jus happen ?"

hehehe

[x emo screamo x]

Uhm....People tell me the bands I like suck ALOT, so I always have a comeback for that ;D lol

Stupid kid: Hey __________ sucks!
Me: Not as much as you do

OR

stupid kid: Hey _________ sucks!
Me: Yeah well you suck things that I shouldn't even be mentioning.

lmao

[MeanBastard]

Well this one time my friend got pissed off at these black girls and said "There's some cotton outside waiting for some picking"

[x emo screamo x]

Well this one time my friend got pissed off at these black girls and said "There's some cotton outside waiting for some picking"

I've heard that one before.

But it's really racist and I'd never say it...

[Re-Mixxed]

For me it's like, 'you diss, you get dissed'. It just comes to mind at that moment in time when you need it.

[eli5e]

i say" f.cuk you"

[pinkfossils]

i usually say


"Dude.. why dont u just like go home and masturbate."

[jnukes]

*friend makes a statement about themselves or anything about their personal life*

me - "okay, look around"
*friend looks around*
me - "see any body that cares?"


PWNED.. everytime... haha =]

[huney8o8]

^^ nicee!! i should use that sumtyme!!

[lozerface87]

" your a smartass. " "its better than being a dumbass."


or


" go die. "

[*Statistik*]

"go f*cking suck a dick u mexican fuckbag"-me

[picaso_smile]

I love them right back.
A lot of people call me a fag, I say Spiderman has made gay. They have no clue what that means, so then I take my tutu off.

///CB- Most of your comebacks suck.

I'll just prove their ignorance.

You totally read my mind.

[HelloSunshine]

mm yeah i have no specific ones...the only ones i can think of are really lame haha but if i got shot at with a comment, i can usually return a comeback pretty quickly. but on the spot? its kinda hard...

yeah hm...i can't really think now..but if someone dissed me right now I could probably write some

[gothicvengeance]

bleh...I wouldn't really say I'm that good with comebacks, I've been through some times in which all I say is something like "shut up"...but I usually use some of these:

(to guys)"Go fcuk yourselves...oh wait you can't because you are lacking in genitals."

Okay, that's nice.

I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.

Will you please do everyone a favor and just go kill yourself?

Looks like someone was dropped on their head as a child...


OR, just the usual curses...you know...fcuk you, shut the fcuk up...yeah.

[gigiopolis]

If it's a face to face thing...I just ignore them. It pisses people off. Or they insult me, and I stare at them for like 3 seconds, say "sure" and return to my work.

[ComradeRed]

We will bury you!

[mai_z]

your mom has always worked well for me haha

[ineed2bluvd]

i use.. "make urself useful and wipe my @$$" or.. "its easy to run ur mouth with nothin in it.. but try to talk ur sh*t when ur giving a bl*wjob u nasty f*ck!!"

[someflipguy]

REDRUM!! MUAHAHAHA!!!

Okay..thats not funny! yikes! I scared myself!

[innovation]

'go fly a kite.'
people said that in PA.
that was stupid.

[Spirited Away]

We will bury you!

Yea, that one's a classic.

[waccoon]

"You look like you belong in second grade, shorty"
"Well, you belong in a <draws imaginary square with fingers> box!"

Man, the people in my school need to get better comebacks.

[rainnydaiis]

All very old and very lame

"everyone needs an ass but not a smart ass"
"why don't you go stick a battery up your ass and feel the power"
"i'll surely have nightmares thanks to your face"
"Hey b*tch!, oo how'd you know I was talking to you"
"Shut up with your 2nd grade crap"

[mzteriouzme007]

haha i like the cardboard box one

[emrzz09]

Haha the other day I was arguing with this little kid (lame...i know)


him: why dont you shutup?!
me: this is stupid..im not going to fight with a 2 year old kid.
him: IM NOT 2!
me:..my bad, 3.

i thought it was funny.

[jnukes]

^lol, good one. =D

i just thought of one a few days ago..

person - 'F*CK YOU!'
me - 'your mom already did that for me'

[lyin_in_wait]

who pissed in ur cherrios

[so0o_contagious]

hmm
person: f*ck you
me: ewww!!!
person: .. umm.. what?
me: your face! ahaha

lol.. that ones stupid.. but i have many.. like.
oh.. do me a favor nd suck your d*ick.. OH WAITT!! i forgot.. you don't have one!

i have more.. but it just depends on what im talking about.. like.. my friends boyfriend.. ugh. he pisses me off. he was like.. at least ******* wants to have sex with me.
nd i was like :then why hasn't she yet? oh.. shes scared of catchin your crabs.

ugh.. that guy pisses me off soo much..lol. yepp.

"do us all a favor nd stick your head out of your ass nd shut the f*ck up." yepp

[nas]

Wow these all sound so... corny

[miss barnes]

i just cuss them out. they usually shut up after that. but then again, people dont diss me, i diss them lol

[diezelbabygrl_xo...]

guy#1: says stupid comeback
guy#2: if i wanted a comeback i'd wipe it off your chin

[[ haha that one always gets me!! its so funny! okie doke.. later ]]

OMFG!! Dude, I'm sooo using that now. Lolz....

[lonelydevil426]

when pplz insult me, i can never think of good comebacks

[*CJ1*]

doofus - you're ugly
me - if im ugly, what're you
doofus - pretty
me - if you're pretty, im glad im ugly.

[m&m]

this guy always sed this 2 me wich anoyed me
me: fark u!!
him: mmm mayb later

[lovescream]

when someone says
"yo' momma!"
I go "YO' ASS!"
they never reply back.
rofl

and if someone says a mean insult like "you're dumb" i go
"i wouldn't be talking."

[xbr0kensmil3]

when someone tells me to shut up i got it's a free country i can say whatever i want. i said that to my teacher when she said be quiet and she's like not in my class and i went well your class is in a school that's in a free country and she ignored me and moved on...but anyways..i either say eff you or your mom or stfu you lil skank

[xheartbreaker]

Usually I get insults thrown at me by the wannabe ghetto guys at our school, so my reply is somewhere along the lines of
"STFU You little wannabe n*gga"
That usually shuts them up... more than anything, they hate being called a wannabe.

Or to anyone else:
"Stick a d*ck in your ear and f*ck what you heard"

[d0nchikit0]

I usually use things like..

Some1: Where'd you get your street cred, Sesame Street?
Me: Where'd you get your face from? I really hope you have the receipt

Some1: Eww your project is gay
Me: Your face is gay

Some1: Eww your project is crappy
Me: Your girlfriend is crappy

Some1: Eww you have something on your face
Me: Your's is being taken over by a horde of ugly insects.

Some1: You suck
Me: Suck a left testicle and make the right one jealous.

XDXD I'm so dumb..

[xXYouMeBedNowXx]

I remember one kid who was getting a yelling fit from the teacher. He just kept smiling. The teacher started stuttering eventually.

[heyyfrankie]

shut the f**k up because i don't speak dumbass!

[silence]

some1: u are ___________ (fill-in-the-blank). ex: stupid/gay/dumb/a slut, etc.
me: look who's talkin.

[freqwenc]

me and my friends always pass around
comebacks.. like, i would say your mom.
then my friend wouls say your face.
so i would top it off with your moms face!

[KELLYYY]

What are you laughing at? You're fat too.

[saysaydaplay]

lol when someones grumpy and takes their anger out on other people and i either go up to them and ask them if they need a nap just to piss them off or say out loud so everyone to hear "looks like someone had a bowl o' b!tch flakes this morning"

haha

[*suddenly she*]

just say anything that confuses them and walk away or accidentally smack them as you walk off.

[Stuckie]

I dont talk. Im quick to just lay you out.

But if would say something it would probably be a simple yo mama joke.

[*basick*]

any girl - you must be __________
me - you must be lesbian

[ANG33ZY]

.. i'd be like..

" eat my balls ".
or
"shut your mouth".

dunno where that came from.

[surfhottieoffcoa...]

i know you are but WHAT AM I!!!

ha JK



YO MAMMA
U PUT MEANING TO IT
THANKS!
is that the wind i hear? it sounds like a voice....
REALLY? I AM? tell me somthing ELS i dont know!
well your a slutty b*tch also...thanks...you too...


ha comebacks.......that was a good topic....though i suck at it...

[pinayprincess]

person a: you dont have a ass
person b: if having a ass has to do with being fat, then no i dont have one, but chea i can get one just by eating all the sh*t you eat

--itz kinda long

[KELLYYY]

Chubby Cheese(Instead of saying Chuck E Cheese ).

[Eryi]

I don't have much, well maybe i do, but i wouldn't like to say them since their kind of racist. Heres 2 of them for blacks: dirty, midnight. Its all for fun. we combat for fun. its no biggie.

[wayne]

"SHUT THE f**k UP"


my favorite one.... i swear it is...lol

[magicfann]

top of da mornin to ya too b!tch

[dahding]

for those homophobic aholes out there...

"i called ur bf gay, and he hit me with his purse."

*backhand* shut the f*** upp....