Dr. :santa: Options

[brooklyneast05]

well i had to make a new thread since TJ ruined my last one. we're starting over.

i've decided to be the self proclaimed relationship expert of createblog's relationship forum. if you need advice, just post your problem here and i will guide you through your trouble waters and relationship hurdles.






NOTICE: don't ask me about mr. compatibility. this thread isn't mr. compatibility. if you have a problem with mr. compatibility's production speed then go find someone else to be him. i'll do it when i want to and i won't when i don't.


this is Dr. , don't get the two confused

[synapse]

well i had to make a new thread since TJ ruined my last one. we're starting over.

i've decided to be the self proclaimed relationship expert of createblog's relationship forum. if you need advice, just post your problem here and i will guide you through your trouble waters and relationship hurdles.

NOTICE: don't ask me about mr. compatibility. this thread isn't mr. compatibility. if you have a problem with mr. compatibility's production speed then go find someone else to be him. i'll do it when i want to and i won't when i don't.
this is Dr. , don't get the two confused

What are your credentials?

[brooklyneast05]

well. i've counseled tj and natalia. i basically hooked up tung and abbey. i have a bromance.



oh yeah and i've been in a long term relationship for the most part since i was 17. i can lend you the advice you need to make your love connection work.

[emberfly]

Everytime I ask for advice you just insult me

[brooklyneast05]

yeah when did you ask me about relationship advice?

[sixfive]

i got a problem
it ain't goin good
my girl ain't doin her things she used to do

[brooklyneast05]

three words: slap a bitch


no, just kidding, dr doesn't promote domestic violence. what is she not doin that she used to do

[fire]

The person I like doesnt seem to appreciate all the effort I put into watching them as they sleep outside their window. Help?

[brooklyneast05]

The person I like doesnt seem to appreciate all the effort I put into watching them as they sleep outside their window. Help?

don't waste your time. just drop them and find someone who appreciates your stalker ways more.

[tokyo-rose]

I'm in TJ's harem and he won't loan me out. What am I supposed to do if I can't earn him money? He won't let me leave, either. I'm trapped. :(

[Simba]

my broYe

how could she be so heartless

[batman]

Dear Dr.

For a while now, I have been hopelessly pining over my summer class teacher, mainly because I think he's cute and want to screw his super cute, post-hipster-but-still-wearing-hipster-glasses, indie music listening, old enough to be a problem but not too old to be an impossibility self until we both can't see straight.

You see, it started off as a deep physical attraction that was fun and exciting, yet controllable all at the same time since I knew that he had a wife and possibly even children. However, the moment I decided to back off, he stops wearing his wedding ring and starts getting uncomfortably (yet so comfortably) close. He would whisper something to me and his lips would brush my ear, he would put his hand on my back and leave it there a few seconds longer than what should be appropriate, he's developed a habit of brushing against me and invading my personal space (that I am 100% willing to share with him). Once he even walked me all the way to my car because I didn't have an umbrella with me... but it wasn't even raining!

What should I do about this? Should I think about his poor wife and ignore him whenever he gets way too close or should I discreetly slip a motel6 room key into his hand the next time he brushes my hair away from my face ;)

Horny for learning and forever stumped,
Miss Wants-to-f*ck-her-teacher's-brains-out

[brooklyneast05]

I'm in TJ's harem and he won't loan me out. What am I supposed to do if I can't earn him money? He won't let me leave, either. I'm trapped. :(

you're in his what? call the police

my broYe

how could she be so heartless

this question is one that men have been asking for as long as we have existed. i believe it's cause she's a bitch.

Dear Dr.

For a while now, I have been hopelessly pining over my summer class teacher, mainly because I think he's cute and want to screw his super cute, post-hipster-but-still-wearing-hipster-glasses, indie music listening, old enough to be a problem but not too old to be an impossibility self until we both can't see straight.

You see, it started off as a deep physical attraction that was fun and exciting, yet controllable all at the same time since I knew that he had a wife and possibly even children. However, the moment I decided to back off, he stops wearing his wedding ring and starts getting uncomfortably (yet so comfortably) close. He would whisper something to me and his lips would brush my ear, he would put his hand on my back and leave it there a few seconds longer than what should be appropriate, he's developed a habit of brushing against me and invading my personal space (that I am 100% willing to share with him). Once he even walked me all the way to my car because I didn't have an umbrella with me... but it wasn't even raining!

What should I do about this? Should I think about his poor wife and ignore him whenever he gets way too close or should I discreetly slip a motel6 room key into his hand the next time he brushes my hair away from my face ;)

Horny for learning and forever stumped,
Miss Wants-to-f*ck-her-teacher's-brains-out

the shit you said reminds me of twilight's writing


anyway, you should go for it. as long as you realize he's not going to be in it for the long term and you shouldn't get attached. also, you should pick a more upscale hotel, something better than motel6. who wants to f*ck in a motel6? DON'T BE NASTY MELISSA.

[batman]

LOL wat jc. are you calling me a molly sue character who can only think about my vampire lover's angelic face and dazzling features? :(

how about a best western?

seriously though. even though i exaggerated shit in my not-so-anonymous letter, he really needs to stop getting so close. it can give a girl ideas

[brooklyneast05]

look as long as they have a free continental breakfast then it's all good you know?

[Just_Dream]

Dear Dr.

For a while now, I have been hopelessly pining over my summer class teacher, mainly because I think he's cute and want to screw his super cute, post-hipster-but-still-wearing-hipster-glasses, indie music listening, old enough to be a problem but not too old to be an impossibility self until we both can't see straight.

You see, it started off as a deep physical attraction that was fun and exciting, yet controllable all at the same time since I knew that he had a wife and possibly even children. However, the moment I decided to back off, he stops wearing his wedding ring and starts getting uncomfortably (yet so comfortably) close. He would whisper something to me and his lips would brush my ear, he would put his hand on my back and leave it there a few seconds longer than what should be appropriate, he's developed a habit of brushing against me and invading my personal space (that I am 100% willing to share with him). Once he even walked me all the way to my car because I didn't have an umbrella with me... but it wasn't even raining!

What should I do about this? Should I think about his poor wife and ignore him whenever he gets way too close or should I discreetly slip a motel6 room key into his hand the next time he brushes my hair away from my face ;)

Horny for learning and forever stumped,
Miss Wants-to-f*ck-her-teacher's-brains-out

Sorry Dr. , but Dr. is stepping in...

Have you seen the movie "He's Not That Into You"?! If not, rent it or download it. SRSLY, he's probably just in it for your body (you are young and attractive in his eyes), and is probably hoping that his wife eventually finds out so he can leave her...




No strings attached is fine. You might be seen as the bitch by others, but a gotta make ends meet (in your case, make grades MEAT) and satisfy her sexual desire once in a while. As Drew Barrymore's character Mary said, "It's exhausting..." (although not exactly in the same context).

EDIT: p.s. if he's paying, might as well stay at the Hilton.

[brooklyneast05]

i disagree with Dr. . i thought bradley cooper and scarlett johansson's characters were the worst in that movie. i liked every one else's story line way better than theirs. why would you want melissa to be in their position? everyone in that love triangle ended up miserable! don't go rent that. if you want to go rent a chick movie, then rent bride wars > he's just not that into you. anne hathaway & kate hudson > he's just not that into you's entire cast imo. that has nothing to do with your situation though. actually scratch it, rent a movie you can invite your teacher to come watch with you ok?

EDIT: p.s. if he's paying, might as well stay at the Hilton.

it's going to be hard to work it out where you can slip him a key that he already paid for in advanced.....but if you can do then props to you.

[Just_Dream]

i disagree with Dr. . i thought bradley cooper and scarlett johansson's characters were the worst in that movie. i liked every one else's story line way better than theirs.

it's going to be hard to work it out where you can slip him a key that he already paid for in advanced.....but if you can do then props to you.

Dunno, I haven't seen Bride Wars, but I should probably download it rent it asap if a recommends it. Dr. approves. I'll admit, Scarlett's love triangle sucked (I only liked Justin Long's and Ginnifer's even though they were both annoying, and Jennifer Aniston's), but she was hot. mmm Scarlett Johansson... It was a decent movie since it actually kept me interested.

And I mentioned this movie in case Melz wants to do some "roleplaying" if you catch my drift.

You should know us are all cheapasses! More like you slip him the key, and get him to pay for the room afterward.

[brooklyneast05]

bride wars wasn't amazing, so don't pay for it, download that shit for sure. i watched it the night after he's not that into you though so i always compare those. i forget jennifer anniston was even in that movie, but yeah she was the best one in it cause i like to look at her.


Dr. catches Dr.'s drift

[DoubleJ]

fail.

[brooklyneast05]

fail.

explain

[DoubleJ]

It was a joke haha.

I have a serious problem though and I think you can help me.

[brooklyneast05]

oh. that. was. hilarious.



are you having women problems

[DoubleJ]

Yes I am.

[brooklyneast05]

WELL WHAT'S THE DEAL

[brooklyneast05]

hey you edited my post

[DoubleJ]

haha I did lmao!

Well here is the situation:
Let me start of by saying that I have the utmost respect for my friends. I think of some of them as blood. Well my boy is "messing" with this girl. They aren't a couple but they are I guess you can say a tad more than just friends? Well in any event over the past few days I have come to realize that I have feelings for this girl and she has admitted to me and to one of our friends that she has feelings for me too. What do I do?

[brooklyneast05]

haha I did lmao!

Well here is the situation:
Let me start of by saying that I have the utmost respect for my friends. I think of some of them as blood. Well my boy is "messing" with this girl. They aren't a couple but they are I guess you can say a tad more than just friends? Well in any event over the past few days I have come to realize that I have feelings for this girl and she has admitted to me and to one of our friends that she has feelings for me too. What do I do?

oh that's a sucky situation. i don't even know if there's an answer to ones like that.


i think you should be careful cause you're on dangerous territory here my . objective number one should be to figure out what they are. you might think you know, your friends might think they know, but really no one does besides the dude and this girl. which means there's almost no way around going through one of them to figure this out. i don't know your relationships with them. if you're really close to this dude then maybe you can straight up ask him what the deal is between him and this girl, how much he likes her. if that's not a good idea, then i would go through the girl since you already know she's on a similar page to you. she can let you know how much "more than friends" her and your friend are. although that can be awkward too so you might just get stuck...

maybe you'll luck out and find out that they aren't as tight as you thought. if you find out it doesn't look safe then i think you should take a step back and think more about it. you realized only over the last few days you had feelings for her. you don't wanna jump in and f*ck up good friendships just because you had a little crush on someone. it's easy to have intense feelings that seem like a big deal but then it quickly fades and you realize it wasn't that legit. also if he's just messing with her, he might be done messing with her before long and move on to the next one. but in the event he feels like she's more than a girl to play with, you have to figure out whether there is enough there between you two to risk upsetting him.

if you discover more and more than you really like her then it's sometimes worth going for. if you just wanna mess around with her too then i would just drop it if i were you and find someone else with less complications. you can only mess with a friends girl if you think something big time is gonna come out of it, like a real legit long lasting relationship. legit legit this is a bad situation to make a mistake in homie

[DoubleJ]

you are completely right. I know that they are just friends with benefits. He is in love with his ex and she wants something more than a relationship but not with him. She has expressed her desire to stop f*cking with him but she can't seem to stop....Idk...I am really feeling her but I might just have to leave this one alone.

[brooklyneast05]

her not stopping f*cking around with him is making the situation worse. i mean if she would just stop you would probably be in the clear (somewhat) because he would be preoccupied worrying about his ex problems


especially if she doesn't show an equal interest in you i would drop it. i mean she needs to stop f*cking him if she wants you much lol ya know

[DoubleJ]

I know completely! Thanks my

[-DressYourEyelid...]

ok dr. - i want to have a threesome with my ex-girlfriend (i am bestfriends with her) and my fiance. i know he wants to indulge in, err, my fantasy.but he's hesitant just the same. we've done stuff with other people, but it has been a long time.
how do i talk him into it/make him feel comfortable with it? should i give up on this fancy?

:)

[Simba]

Sorry Dr. , but Dr. is stepping in...

[superstitious]

This thread is getting kind of freaky. Threesomes and college professor f*cking. You've got your hands full, .

[brooklyneast05]

ok dr. - i want to have a threesome with my ex-girlfriend (i am bestfriends with her) and my fiance. i know he wants to indulge in, err, my fantasy.but he's hesitant just the same. we've done stuff with other people, but it has been a long time.
how do i talk him into it/make him feel comfortable with it? should i give up on this fancy?

:)

nah you shouldn't give up unless he comes out and says straight up he's not interested in it at all. if a dude doesn't wanna do something sexually, he'll typically make it known he doesn't want to do it. you should talk to him about it in detail. dudes like details, tell him everything you want to do. also guys are selfish mother f*ckers about sex so don't spend too much time stressing that it's all about you. which it kinda is cause it's YOUR ex and YOUR fiance, it's centered around you. is he intimidated because it's your ex specifically? if so that could be harder i suppose.

This thread is getting kind of freaky. Threesomes and college professor f*cking. You've got your hands full, .

i know wtf

[-DressYourEyelid...]

You've got your hands full, .

[Teesa]

also guys are selfish mother f*ckers about sex so don't spend too much time stressing that it's all about you.

[brooklyneast05]

that's good advice

[Teesa]

how does this smiley disagreeing with your advice? hmmmmmm?

[brooklyneast05]

you're right. i take back my

[Teesa]

always being so difficult

[Simba]

broye is bitter cause kanye still with amber rose

[brooklyneast05]

yeah i almost refuse to post her on our blog.

[batman]

Sorry Dr. , but Dr. is stepping in...

Have you seen the movie "He's Not That Into You"?! If not, rent it or download it. SRSLY, he's probably just in it for your body (you are young and attractive in his eyes), and is probably hoping that his wife eventually finds out so he can leave her...


No strings attached is fine. You might be seen as the bitch by others, but a gotta make ends meet (in your case, make grades MEAT) and satisfy her sexual desire once in a while. As Drew Barrymore's character Mary said, "It's exhausting..." (although not exactly in the same context).

EDIT: p.s. if he's paying, might as well stay at the Hilton.

LOL he's only 30 so its not that far of a jump, right? i'm pretty much in it because i think he's strangely attractive and i find the situation sort of thrilling; def not expecting him to leave his family for me fasho.

i disagree with Dr. . i thought bradley cooper and scarlett johansson's characters were the worst in that movie. i liked every one else's story line way better than theirs. why would you want melissa to be in their position? everyone in that love triangle ended up miserable! don't go rent that. if you want to go rent a chick movie, then rent bride wars > he's just not that into you. anne hathaway & kate hudson > he's just not that into you's entire cast imo. that has nothing to do with your situation though. actually scratch it, rent a movie you can invite your teacher to come watch with you ok?

it's going to be hard to work it out where you can slip him a key that he already paid for in advanced.....but if you can do then props to you.

<3

[hypnotique]

ok dr. - i want to have a threesome with my ex-girlfriend (i am bestfriends with her) and my fiance. i know he wants to indulge in, err, my fantasy.but he's hesitant just the same. we've done stuff with other people, but it has been a long time.
how do i talk him into it/make him feel comfortable with it? should i give up on this fancy?

:)

God, i would never ever EVER have a 3way with my bf and my exgirlfriend. I just cant deal with him touching all over someone i already touched.
3 ways in general with boyfriends are waters my ship doesn't like to sail personally.

[DoubleJ]

update: I told her how I felt...

[brooklyneast05]

what happened

[DoubleJ]

well it's kind of hard to say at this moment. I think she is stuck on him for whatever reason, but I also think she is coming to the realization that they aren't even together and she is just holding on to false hope.

[creole]

DOCTA DOTCA, I'M AFRAID TO OPEN UP TO HIM ):

[brooklyneast05]

DOCTA DOTCA, I'M AFRAID TO OPEN UP TO HIM ):

i need more information on the situation

Serious question. If ex shows me nudes, do I -

a. Be mature about it
b. Spam

be mature about it. when it comes to ex vs ex battles, karma does exist.

[none345678]

I'm falling in love with a sheep. Should I go all southern comfort in this bitch or fight my bestiality urges?

[brooklyneast05]

I'm falling in love with a sheep. Should I go all southern comfort in this bitch or fight my bestiality urges?

if it's a bah bah black sheep then go for it otherwise don't bother

[karmakiller]

Serious question. If ex shows me nudes, do I -

a. Be mature about it
b. Spam

Looking at them might make you feel guilty, so you should probably share your guilt with someone, like me. It will be easier to deal with that way and also easier for you to fight your spamming urges.

[brooklyneast05]

^yeah i approve of the advice from the karmakiller

karma does exist.

[none345678]

if it's a bah bah black sheep then go for it otherwise don't bother

Thanks Jce, I'll keep your advice in mind.

[hypnotique]

Serious question. If ex shows me nudes, do I -

a. Be mature about it
b. Spam

Dont even accept them..
wtf thats like handing a secret weapon to the enemy country

[libertie]

>.<

How do I stop waiting for his calls? I feel pathetic.

[brooklyneast05]

>.<

How do I stop waiting for his calls? I feel pathetic.

well what's the situation? he's just not calling you enough i think i need more info to understand why you're waiting, whether you're talking about your boyfriend or just a guy you like, ect ect.

[libertie]

LOL. It's definitely my boyfriend, and I'm just feeling insecure in general. We've been dating for over six months and I'm still not really that sure he wants to be in this relationship or if he's just sticking around for my sake. Every once in a while he'll say something that just completely blows me away, but I can't stop feeling like he's not all that enthusiastic about this.. There are some things that happened with him this summer that I don't want to say too much about, but basically he almost broke up with me. It's tough to come back from something like that, most girls wouldn't stick around after what he said. I did, because I really felt like the problems he had were things I could do something about. But even though he acts like he's happy when we're together, it's hard to shake the feeling that for a while he WAS thinking that he'd be happier if he wasn't with me.

But all that aside, I'm working on getting past those particular insecurities. He tells me that if he didn't want to be with me he would say so. I believe him, it's just that we spent so much time together before without me having any idea that something was wrong, and THEN he told me that there was a problem. It's hard to say I want to come up one weekend and have him tell me that he would rather spend time alone, but I'm trying to be able to hear that without getting hurt because I DO understand the need to be alone sometimes.

Basically, I think I'm suffocating him and I want to be able to give him some air without going crazy MYSELF. Sitting around and constantly checking my phone waiting for him to call all the time is making me crazy, and it's certainly not helping.. I want to be unavailable to him sometimes, too, so I can stop feeling like I'm always the one who's missing him.

[Simba]

idk just don't 4chan /b/ it up k unless you want her to be everybody else's ex too

[batman]

dr. , where is the line between "somewhat indiscreet" and "kinda slutty."

[brooklyneast05]

@ dani

But even though he acts like he's happy when we're together, it's hard to shake the feeling that for a while he WAS thinking that he'd be happier if he wasn't with me.

well there's no way to be 100% certain in cases like this i don't think. but for your own sanity, in my opinion, it's better to think the best than think the worst unless he's giving you a huge reason to believe that he isn't happy NOW. you can't spend that much time worrying about what happened before or it's going to kill stuff now. he says he would would tell you if he didn't want to be with you, so you have to believe that. you can't spend your time trying to predict problems and break ups. it will drive you crazy and it will completely drive him away. from a guy's perspective, it's extremely annoying to be with a girl and like her, and have her constantly telling you that you don't want to be with her, or that you don't seem to want to be with her. the word "seem" can be a bad things with dudes, so be careful of telling a guy what he does or doesn't "seem" like because a lot of us regard "seeming" as just some imaginary bullshit.

I believe him, it's just that we spent so much time together before without me having any idea that something was wrong, and THEN he told me that there was a problem.

yeah i know what you mean. you can't be blamed 100% for having that worry, but like i said you just have to trust it won't happen this time or else you'll find yourself looking for little "signs" of problems or disinterest constantly. anyone can do this, but women are notoriously bad about trying to pick up on signs, feelings, or thinking they have some sort of 6th sense for this kind of thing. they're wrong a good percentage of the time. and them asserting that we have a problem when we don't actually have one will piss us off and ultimately create a real problem to be worried about. also, i don't think this is with every situation, but a lot of times the second time around is easier for someone to express they have a problem. meaning that he might have held out on you the first time when he had problems, but once something has gone down like this in a relationship, i don't think people spend as much time trying to cover it up the second time.

Basically, I think I'm suffocating him and I want to be able to give him some air without going crazy MYSELF. Sitting around and constantly checking my phone waiting for him to call all the time is making me crazy, and it's certainly not helping.. I want to be unavailable to him sometimes, too, so I can stop feeling like I'm always the one who's missing him.

yeah you need to keep yourself busy and learn how to deal with that anxious waiting feeling. it's an annoying feeling. you have to train yourself to not let it get to you. that kind of shit will ruin a relationship for the reason you said, suffocating. suffocating drives guys off and makes us uninterested. when we wanna be alone we wanna be alone, and we don't want to have to feel guilty about it. even if i'm off doing something else, i can't feel completely "free" if i know someone is sitting around expecting something from me. if he knows you're busy doing something else and not waiting around on him, he's probably more likely to be able to freely enjoy his time away without that guilt. i don't know how much you are wanting him to call you, so i couldn't say if i think it's too much. communication is good, but too much is overkill and a lot of times leaves people with nothing to talk about when they do get to hang out.

[brooklyneast05]

dr. , where is the line between "somewhat indiscreet" and "kinda slutty."

are we still talking about your professor?


and i don't know if very many guys draw a line between the two.

[Simba]

my broYe, may be contacting you in the near future

[libertie]

Thankfully, I don't place these huge demands on him or anything, lol. As far as me waiting for him to call, he pretty much calls at certain times every day (he works and most of the time he'll call me really quick on his lunch break, then when he gets off work and such).. The problem is I'll spend my entire day feeling anxious up to that point, waiting for that phone call. I feel like a parasite or something.

When he asks for space, I'm not gonna lie, I am initially kind of stung by it. But I'm not lying when I say I AM okay with giving him the space he needs, so I try not to let him SEE that I'm a little upset at first. The reaction I've been giving lately is to smile (as genuinely as possible) and just say it's not a big deal, because even if I'm acting spoiled about it, deep down I KNOW it's not a big deal so I'm not lying to him. I've learned that if I even let my emotions show a little bit, though, it ruins the whole thing and puts him in a bad mood. Not that I'm being fake or dishonest, I'm just trying to suppress the "spoiled girl not getting what she wants" reaction because that's not an accurate picture of how I REALLY feel. It's just how I react initially to being told I can't have something, before I give myself time to think about it. :P

..yeah.. Even as a girl growing up without a whole lot, most of us still have spoiled tendencies.

[brooklyneast05]

if it's not a big deal and you know it's not a big deal, why do you have that reaction of wanting to act spoiled about it at all?

and yeah i definitely agree you should get away from that waiting all day for the phone call business. i think you're way too attached to him if your day revolves around his phone call you need to work past that for your own sake though.

I've learned that if I even let my emotions show a little bit, though, it ruins the whole thing and puts him in a bad mood.

see i think this is wrong of him. i think it's wrong of anyone to be like this towards their bf/gf. i don't like the idea of having to walk on eggshells for fear the other person is gonna be launched into a bad mood. i know first hand what it's like (to be the one watching my step and to be the one who gets sent into a bad mood over almost nothing) and i don't like it. i think it puts an awkward strain on things constantly.

my broYe, may be contacting you in the near future

i got your back broye

[batman]

mi profesor me dio una "A" :D

[Teesa]

^congrats, now go and get some of that extra credit ;)

[Simba]

mi profesor me dio una "A" :D

[DoubleJ]

I am wondering if I am getting sprung off of different girls because I have never had a g.f. before. I am now getting sprung off of a shorty at my job and we are both flirting hard but their are two red flags: 1 she has a son 2. her bf lives like 15 blocks away from me. What do I do, because we share the same interests and everything: sex, fashion, food, fashion...sex.

[brooklyneast05]

I am wondering if I am getting sprung off of different girls because I have never had a g.f. before. I am now getting sprung off of a shorty at my job and we are both flirting hard but their are two red flags: 1 she has a son 2. her bf lives like 15 blocks away from me. What do I do, because we share the same interests and everything: sex, fashion, food, fashion...sex.

this is a different girl than the one like a week ago right? lol


anyway i don't know if that's the reason you're getting sprung. i don't think getting sprung on a girl who has a boyfriend is a good idea in the first place. are you really going to go after someone who isn't single and ha a kid

[hypnotique]

Lets see your skills.

Man needs to break it off because he needs to focus on school. Man says he loves me and he intends on not making the break up permanent. Man isnt looking for a relationship with anyone and tells me daily hes still crazy about me and all that shit. How ever man feels he cannot tell me things that are flirtatious or about how attractive he finds me because at this time we are just "friends" So with that said I decided to take an offer to go on a date with a classmate of mine, I still have feelings for man but I don't like how he will only pay attention to me if he feels theres a possibility theres another man or woman trying to hit on me or get with me and then has all these expectations that I shouldn't expect him to treat me the same as he did when i was his girlfriend and he keeps throwing the "friends" card on me anytime i decide to express my feelings...Yet somehow when hes threatened he'll pour all the love on me and do the whole "i miss you" bullshit.

So with that said, Is it wrong to date other people? even though man says he loves me and this break up isnt permanent but it looks like we are going to be separated well into a full year or something (I dont have a interest in going as far as to have sex with other people) but I just want little dates here and there.

[DoubleJ]

Idk what's wrong with me jc. I am just lost.

Diana it is fine to date other people. I he has a problem with you dating remember to let him know that this is what he wanted.

[brooklyneast05]

Lets see your skills.

Man needs to break it off because he needs to focus on school. Man says he loves me and he intends on not making the break up permanent. Man isnt looking for a relationship with anyone and tells me daily hes still crazy about me and all that shit. How ever man feels he cannot tell me things that are flirtatious or about how attractive he finds me because at this time we are just "friends" So with that said I decided to take an offer to go on a date with a classmate of mine, I still have feelings for man but I don't like how he will only pay attention to me if he feels theres a possibility theres another man or woman trying to hit on me or get with me and then has all these expectations that I shouldn't expect him to treat me the same as he did when i was his girlfriend and he keeps throwing the "friends" card on me anytime i decide to express my feelings...Yet somehow when hes threatened he'll pour all the love on me and do the whole "i miss you" bullshit.

So with that said, Is it wrong to date other people? even though man says he loves me and this break up isnt permanent but it looks like we are going to be separated well into a full year or something (I dont have a interest in going as far as to have sex with other people) but I just want little dates here and there.

dr. says yes you should date. he shouldn't have any claim over you whatsoever. if you by choice want to not go very far or get involved with other people then that's ok as long as it's for your sake and not his. but his opinion on that matter is irrelevant. he can't play the jealousy junk because he lost his right to do that when he broke it off. if he wanted to lay any kind of claim on you that badly then they should have stayed with you.

i don't believe in the focus on school stuff. i guess maybe that's a legit reason for some people, i don't know. my girlfriend has never made it impossible for me to "focus on school" or vise versa. that's just my situation though, you guys are probably way different from my relationship. i still feel like people could make it work if they wanted to that badly you know?

anyway you should have no obligations or be required to do or not do something over him anymore. if you're friends then you're friends both ways. he can't have his cake and eat it too.


p.s. i don't even get what the point is in pretending you're just friends and trying to treat you like one. that seems stupid/a waste of time if he intends to get back with you anyway.

[brooklyneast05]

Idk what's wrong with me jc. I am just lost.

what do you mean lost homie

[hypnotique]

thank you.

p.s. i don't even get what the point is in pretending you're just friends and trying to treat you like one. that seems stupid/a waste of time if he intends to get back with you anyway.

When he first decided to do this, thats exactly what I said. And yeah I don't buy into the need to focus on school deal because as you stated if you really really wanted to one could easily make it work.

he can kiss my half rican ass at point </endrage>

[Just_Dream]

p.s. i don't even get what the point is in pretending you're just friends and trying to treat you like one. that seems stupid/a waste of time if he intends to get back with you anyway.

Agreed. He should have just said "I need some space", if he still cares about you and wants to "stay with you" (or get back together with you later). It's the same shit, except he's still committed and "attached". Nothing wrong with asking for space. Plus, Diana, you're not the type of chick to go psycho over "needing space", and he should understand that. Trust me, there's a lot of psycho bitches out there that go nuts when the guy says "I need some space". They'll think their guys are cheating on them or some shit. Especially the crazy Vietnamese ones... LUL.

/

[hypnotique]

Agreed. He should have just said "I need some space", if he still cares about you and wants to "stay with you" (or get back together with you later). It's the same shit, except he's still committed and "attached". Nothing wrong with asking for space. Plus, Diana, you're not the type of chick to go psycho over "needing space", and he should understand that. Trust me, there's a lot of psycho bitches out there that go nuts when the guy says "I need some space". They'll think their guys are cheating on them or some shit. Especially the crazy Vietnamese ones... LUL.

/

I know right.

So as i went on my movie date today, apparently he felt the urge to harass my IM and my myspace mail with messages asking about where was i and why i wasn't online or something because he "needed to talk to me" and then I get back and say i went to a movie he starts asking me shit about who i went and I kept it simple and said some friends, he sits there and acts all pissy and shit

[batman]

i don't believe in the focus on school stuff. i guess maybe that's a legit reason for some people, i don't know. my girlfriend has never made it impossible for me to "focus on school" or vise versa. that's just my situation though, you guys are probably way different from my relationship. i still feel like people could make it work if they wanted to that badly you know?

agree w/ dr

i think we've had this conversation before a while back. tbh taking a break because of school or work is just ridiculous. if he needs to focus on school, then maybe give him some space or let him study when he needs to study. it doesn't mean you guys need to actually "break up but not break up" and go through all that unnecessary drama.

[brooklyneast05]

it doesn't mean you guys need to actually "break up but not break up" and go through all that unnecessary drama.

yeah exactly. i think having a break up makes it harder to focus on school/work/anything than staying together.

[DoubleJ]

what do you mean lost homie

Like idk I don't usually go for girls like this. I think that I am pressing too hard!

[smash]

there's this guy i'm interested in, he's friend's with one of my friends. i was going to ask my friend about him because i knew he would be honest and i could get some info on him before i decided to make any kind of move. me and my friend were supposed to meet up at the movies last weekend so i figured that would be a good time to ask him. but when we were walking around after the movie he tried to hold my hand. i thought to myself "oh crap, he likes me. this is going to be awkward." how do you think i should handle this? should i still pursue his friend or not?

[redfred]

Removed.

This post has been edited by Cristy: Aug 15 2009, 12:12 PM

Reason for edit: Spam link. - Cristy

[brooklyneast05]

there's this guy i'm interested in, he's friend's with one of my friends. i was going to ask my friend about him because i knew he would be honest and i could get some info on him before i decided to make any kind of move. me and my friend were supposed to meet up at the movies last weekend so i figured that would be a good time to ask him. but when we were walking around after the movie he tried to hold my hand. i thought to myself "oh crap, he likes me. this is going to be awkward." how do you think i should handle this? should i still pursue his friend or not?

that's sucky. well you shouldn't go through him anymore to find out info i suppose. however if you still really like the friend, i think you should pursue it. it's too bad that it's probably not gonna go over well with this other guy, but that's just how it is sometimes. if you really want that dude you shouldn't have to ignore that for the sake of not hurting this guys feelings. also you shouldn't just give it up if you're real interested becasue this friend might not even care that much. him trying to hold your hand doesn't necessarily mean he's madly in love with you or anything. maybe he was just testing the water. i duno the whole thing kinda depends on how much your friend likes you i suppose.

Removed.

sorry, it seems you're so delusional that you're far beyond the help of Dr.

This post has been edited by Cristy: Aug 15 2009, 12:13 PM

Reason for edit: Removed redfred's link from your quote. - Cristy

[Maccabee]

Time to bring a little still in school action up in here.

Here is my situation doc. I wont go into to much detail. I have been in this situations many times. I have given out really strong messages and now im stuck in a corner and cant back out without braking some hearts. I think im gonna stick to it, but I need a backup plan to get out that doesnt involve crying. I hate the sound of crying girls...

[tokyo-rose]

Time to bring a little still in school action up in here.

Here is my situation doc. I wont go into to much detail. I have been in this situations many times. I have given out really strong messages and now im stuck in a corner and cant back out without braking some hearts. I think im gonna stick to it, but I need a backup plan to get out that doesnt involve crying. I hate the sound of crying girls...

1. How is supposed to help you if you're going to provide that little detail?

2. So do what you did all those other times. I'm sure you've lost count of all the girls whose hearts you've broken by now; another one won't matter.

[datass]

lol @ jcp breaking girls' hearts

[gojira]

am i a creeper for wanting to know more about relationship :3

BIO???

[brooklyneast05]

Time to bring a little still in school action up in here.

Here is my situation doc. I wont go into to much detail. I have been in this situations many times. I have given out really strong messages and now im stuck in a corner and cant back out without braking some hearts. I think im gonna stick to it, but I need a backup plan to get out that doesnt involve crying. I hate the sound of crying girls...

well like cristy already said i don't really know how to answer something so vague. i don't think anyone likes crying girls that much. girls cry though, it's just what they do. give me more info and i'll give you a better answer.

am i a creeper for wanting to know more about relationship :3
BIO???

what we've talked about this in cbc a biography of my relationship could fill a novel though, for real. more specific question

[Mikeplyts]

lol @ jcp breaking girls' hearts

[Maccabee]

lol @ jcp breaking girls' hearts

Im 14?

well like cristy already said i don't really know how to answer something so vague. i don't think anyone likes crying girls that much. girls cry though, it's just what they do. give me more info and i'll give you a better answer.
what we've talked about this in cbc a biography of my relationship could fill a novel though, for real. more specific question

Well for a start she is 13 and im 14. I had a crush on her the year before at a camp and I knew she liked me. I saw two months ago and then I started talking to her strictly via texting/messaging/stupid stuff. So basically I was talking to the 12 year old erin. (the fact that she was 12 a year ago kind of freaks me out) Well I told her I hd a crush on her and of course I was right about her having a crush on me
Well she has a very complicated family and she was staying with her mom in Idaho for a month so we talked a lot over ext during that time and we talked on the phone like every three days or something. And by talked a lot I mean, she texted me every hour of every day for the whole month. So I just rolled with it, but I could tell she was getting really attached and liked me. Of course when I start talking to girls I get into the swing and start flirting a lot, but of course I still havent seen her for months. So finally she gets back and I see her. For a start she looks very different. You know about my chin fetish, well. her chin sucks. hahaha. And she is always with her friends but all of her friends annoy the crap, out of me! So basically I gave her the idea I really loved when I didnt even know her! And now if it gets any worse I need away to back out. This is why I think dating before 16 is stupid. And I did something like this before. I told a girl I loved her over the phone but then of course she turned out to be a needy bi... brat. So I cut it, and now she is my stalker. I promised myself I wouldnt tell a girl I loved her or anything like that over the phone again. But I cant help flirting.

That was long. Hope you dont mind, ahaha. Typing on this mac is the bomb!

[brooklyneast05]

Im 14?
Well for a start she is 13 and im 14. I had a crush on her the year before at a camp and I knew she liked me. I saw two months ago and then I started talking to her strictly via texting/messaging/stupid stuff. So basically I was talking to the 12 year old erin. (the fact that she was 12 a year ago kind of freaks me out) Well I told her I hd a crush on her and of course I was right about her having a crush on me
Well she has a very complicated family and she was staying with her mom in Idaho for a month so we talked a lot over ext during that time and we talked on the phone like every three days or something. And by talked a lot I mean, she texted me every hour of every day for the whole month. So I just rolled with it, but I could tell she was getting really attached and liked me. Of course when I start talking to girls I get into the swing and start flirting a lot, but of course I still havent seen her for months. So finally she gets back and I see her. For a start she looks very different. You know about my chin fetish, well. her chin sucks. hahaha. And she is always with her friends but all of her friends annoy the crap, out of me! So basically I gave her the idea I really loved when I didnt even know her! And now if it gets any worse I need away to back out. This is why I think dating before 16 is stupid. And I did something like this before. I told a girl I loved her over the phone but then of course she turned out to be a needy bi... brat. So I cut it, and now she is my stalker. I promised myself I wouldnt tell a girl I loved her or anything like that over the phone again. But I cant help flirting.

That was long. Hope you dont mind, ahaha. Typing on this mac is the bomb!

there isn't anything to do besides back out. you can't just keep going along with it and pretending like you like her when you don't and being around her annoys you. you can just try to back out slowly rather than saying cya bitch and ignoring her. if she cries then she cries, there's not much to do about it. just tell her you don't wanna get too serious because you're only 14. you really should stop telling them you love them though. that's not going to get you anywhere good. you can flirt without telling her you love her...

[Maccabee]

I havent told her I love her. But she thinks I do.

[brooklyneast05]

I havent told her I love her. But she thinks I do.

well that's her own fault then i guess i mean she's not your girlfriend so you shouldn't have so many obligations to her. do you still text her a lot?

[Maccabee]

I should probably stop holding her hand then, huh.

O and she just called me crying

[brooklyneast05]

yeah holding her hand doesn't fall under the "backing off" category

[Maccabee]

guilty... Just when im alone with her, shes great but I just dont like her friends nd stuff.

[brooklyneast05]

well dr. says you have to choose one or the other. the longer you keep doing what you're doing the more drawn out and difficult it will be and the more crying for you to listen to.

[none345678]

slap her

[Just_Dream]

slap her

I like you