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HELP!!! QUICK!! I DUNNO WHAT TO DO!!
TangyBang
post Jul 29 2008, 03:02 AM
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ok this is what happening,

my parents are out with family friends, and theyll be back any minute so i need your help

see, i volunteer on my sister's softball team (im 22 the girls are 15)

and whatever, i met this girl, her name is Alison, and were going out for a while. We have a lot in common, and sometimes i help her with homework. i helped her with her english essay and she still got a D... this is because her teacher is a prick... anywayz

so she came over like an hour ago, and i really want to lose my virginity, so i ask her to have sex

"no no i cant, its not right" she said, but i told her "dont worry, i know what im doing, ill be done in like 10 seconds, plus ill give you 2 n64 games if you say yes."

So then I gave her Diddy Kong Racing and Ken Griffy Jr. Baseball and we went up to my room. she is a bit confused and scared.

then i think to myself- yo i need lube, right? cuz i heard other people saying you need to lube up her clit otherwise it wont fit in properly.

ok so i have no lube, but i really want to lose my virginity, so i grab some butter from the fridge, but its cold and it wont melt, so i microwaved it for 8 minutes and i put it in a glass and poured it on her cooter, and now shes saying i burned it.

i dont know what to do, my parents are going to be back any minute and shes crying in the bathroom plz help you guys are really smart please help me.

any idea how to shut her up? should i give her another n64 game?
 
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heyo-captain-jac...
post Jul 29 2008, 03:10 AM
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Gray rape.

Also, N64 sucks, get a Playstation.


And saliva makes decent enough lubrication. But your best bet is petroleum jelly.
 
Sandraaa
post Jul 29 2008, 03:46 AM
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LMFAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
 
shoryuken
post Jul 29 2008, 08:14 AM
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shiet lyke diz laamee n needaa closee...

u ginnaa makk summ thrad... makee funn thradd.. diz shiett lamee..
 
ofconfidence
post Jul 29 2008, 10:35 AM
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AHAHAHA! LMFAOOOO

YOU DONT PUT BUTTER IN THE MICROWAVE FOR 8 minutes no matter how frozen it is.
two minutes tops are you kidding!?
this is soo borderline rape.
and if you're 22 you probably shouldn't have done this at your parents house because it's ILLEGAL.

ohmygod, good luck with this one.
 
Joanne
post Jul 29 2008, 04:42 PM
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crazy.gif blink.gif
 
moninja
post Jul 29 2008, 04:47 PM
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R U A Q T ? [;
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QUOTE(Joannnnnne @ Jul 29 2008, 02:42 PM) *
crazy.gif blink.gif
+ XD.gif laugh.gif
poor girl.
 
manny-the-dino
post Jul 29 2008, 04:48 PM
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Wow..

1. You're 22, she's 15. I see a problem with that.
2. If she says, "No" it's no.
3. Sex for N64 games? blink.gif
4. You used butter instead of lube? Oh my gosh.
5. I dk what else to say.


This thread is.... huh.gif
 
moninja
post Jul 29 2008, 04:56 PM
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oh and wtf
QUOTE(TangyBang @ Jul 29 2008, 01:02 AM) *
see, i volunteer on my sister's softball team (im 22 the girls are
does that mean you f**ked your sister's friend? mellow.gif crazy.gif
 
Joanne
post Jul 29 2008, 04:57 PM
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I'm just going to hope this was a very very sad and pathetic joke.
 
coconutter
post Jul 29 2008, 04:59 PM
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Give her mario kart!
 
aaayotiffany
post Jul 29 2008, 05:01 PM
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yo yo yiggidy yo.
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QUOTE(Joannnnnne @ Jul 29 2008, 05:42 PM) *
crazy.gif blink.gif

oh my god. loool.gif this is soo wrong on so many levels.
you're 22 and you have to bribe someone to have sex? _dry.gif

try to make her feel better, maybe petroleum jelly might stop the pain for a bit?

this better be a joke. stubborn.gif
 
Tung
post Jul 29 2008, 05:20 PM
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My topic > than this.

http://www.createblog.com/forums/index.php...t=0&start=0
 
Joanne
post Jul 29 2008, 05:22 PM
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^ I remember that... I was like WTF?!?!?!?!!!
 
MilitaryFlower
post Jul 29 2008, 05:47 PM
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loool.gif loool.gif

what the hell...rofl1.gif

Your 22 years old...hookin' up with a 15 year old girl...
that your bribed for sex with games...WTF...
this is wrong on hundreds of levels...and sad on millions...OMG...smh...you gotta be playin'...
 
karmakiller
post Jul 29 2008, 07:16 PM
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This is joke, right?

Damn, butter is greasy. It's gonna take a few showers to get that off.
 
ofconfidence
post Jul 29 2008, 07:51 PM
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you should be a comedian.
 
Eww
post Jul 29 2008, 08:26 PM
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Windex!
 
firechild
post Jul 29 2008, 08:57 PM
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loool.gif
just when i thought i've seen enought stupidity in one day.
XD.gif
 
Butterflyphoenix
post Jul 29 2008, 10:10 PM
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LOL!! XD.gif

microwaving butter???? DAAAAAAAMN!
 
karmakiller
post Jul 29 2008, 11:16 PM
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^ Well, waiting for it to get soft might've made him soft. Or ruined the mood.
 
Edwinbarkhordari...
post Jul 29 2008, 11:19 PM
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Ive heard this joke a million times over..hardy har har, nice try.
 
ofconfidence
post Jul 29 2008, 11:24 PM
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QUOTE(karmakiller @ Jul 30 2008, 12:16 AM) *
^ Well, waiting for it to get soft might've made him soft. Or ruined the mood.


rofl1.gif
 
demolished
post Jul 30 2008, 01:51 AM
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you look terrifying ... you probably forced her.
 
rnicron
post Jul 30 2008, 02:05 AM
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lmfao! my girlfriend would never go for having sex for video games. a pouty face usually does the trick. also, why are you 22 and living at home? statutory rape ftl?

lmfffffffffffffaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaooooooooooooo
 
shoryuken
post Jul 30 2008, 06:53 AM
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wat funni..

alll u ppll takk dizz duu cereeaall wenn dizz storii allll fukenn fakk n shiet..

bunchaa douchezz.. stubborn.gif
 
Vyrrei
post Jul 30 2008, 07:58 PM
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I've seen this before. You guys are dumb.
 
Squishii
post Oct 6 2008, 04:47 AM
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4 words...

YOUR IN BIG SHIT !

ha ha to you !
 
creole
post Oct 6 2008, 06:02 AM
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Dude, maybe if you gave her Super Smash 64, she could have loosened up a bit.
BUT STILLZ< at least she can say this:

"CALL MEH BUTTER, BECAUSE I'M ON YOUR ROLL."
 
james9
post Oct 9 2008, 06:39 PM
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Ooh my GOD you burned her you were going to have sex with your sister's friend ridiculous. She was a little younger but you were mature anyway now make her feel better by sex or by providing a play station.
james anderson
Link removed.
- Cristy

This post has been edited by jaeminnie: Oct 9 2008, 06:49 PM
Reason for edit: Advertisement removed. - Cristy
 
LittleMissSunshi...
post Oct 11 2008, 04:19 PM
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rawr?
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dude, your scarying the girl!
 
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