Createblog Diary Options

[faithin_felix]

so people can post here more than once. perhaps once everyday and share your day with fellow createbloggers. So write your day and what did you do?

[*Kathleen*]

This is neat.

Dear Createblog Diary,
Today I went to the BMX track with the male parental unit to go check out the big NBL tournament they had there. There were tons of hot guys, but all were racing, so I didn't get a chance to talk to them. I wanted to invite Sarah (my bestest best buddy, for all that don't know), but she was sleeping when I called. When I arrived at my house, I called her again. We tried to come up with a plan for the day, but realized nothing would work out, so she went and delivered her candles for her youth group instead. We plan to do something on Monday because her and Jolie (our other friend) are planning to go to a concert.

Edit // Last night, I painted my nails and they're all prettyful pink now! *Giggles*

-Kathleen

(Is that how it's supposed to be? )

This post has been edited by Kathleen: Jun 26 2004, 04:58 PM

[Gypsy Eyes]

sounds like you had fun kathleen

dear createblog diary,
Today was my boyfriend james's birthday, and i wasn't able to see him, so his mom let me in (he was at guitar lessons) and I left the two vinyl albums that i bought him and a cake that I made and a note on his bed.
Later I am going to an incubus concert with karli, i dont know where it is though

-Jackie

[illmizzkim]

Yay.

Dear CB Diary,
I woke up really early this morning so I could get ready for Ate Dessa's Wedding. It was really fun. Ate Dessa looked gorgeous in her wedding gown and there were a lot of hot guys there. Ate Dessa was lucky. Since she married Rob who graduated from West Point, she got to go under a sabre arch. That was really cool. HAHA but the best part was when Ate Dessa threw the bouquet. I caught it! But then my bitch-ass cousin Melanie AKA Donkey-Kong tried to steal it from me. But no, I would not stop. I got it in the end. BWAHAHA . Then this hot guy caught the garter from Rob and he put it on my leg. Teehee, that was fun. I saw a lot of people that I haven't seen in a long time, like Nadine.. and Bryan.. oh damn he's hot. Okay I think I'm done writing for now. Tata my lovely diary..

x3, Kim.

[*Kathleen*]

Jackie - you're going to an INCUBUS concert! *Jealous* Brandon Boyd = drool-worthy

Melissa - aww a wedding! I love weddings! Drinks all around!

[inthemudhole]

Ahh! This is fun!!

Dear createBlog Diary,

Well, today was.. kinda cool. I woke up kinda late, though. 11:30.. anyway, after I woke up, I got online and talked to my boyfriend.. fun, eh? Ooh! And then I went to Best Buy and got two CDs.. "Iowa" by Slipknot, and "Turn the Radio Off" by Reel Big FIsh.. they are great. Later, my boyfriend came over, and we exchanged CDs to burn for each other, so, now I have 2 more Green Day CDs, another Reel Big Fish CD, and another Slipknot CD.

Yes, I am a music nerd. I love music.. it is my life.

Anyway, I've had a pretty good day today..
Blah. But, now Alec is going to another friend's house for the night.. Alec is going to try and persuade his friend to sign online (to yahoo) and then Alec will chat with me. I hope he gets on. I'm dying to talk to him.

Well, I guess I'm out.

--Brie

(Dude, that is awesome! XD)

[onenonly101]

Dear CB,

I just got back from visiting my grandma(really my great aunt but we all call her grandma) and my aunt. I had a good time there. Nigerians are always cracking me up. My actual grandma in Nigeria is in the hospital, the doctor said she had conjestive heart failure. My mom brought up a good point since when did they have the machines to test for that dieases!!! He just wants her to stay in the hospital so he can get some money. It kills me how everyone thinks that America is just thuis great place where everybody has tons of money. When in reality we all gotta work for our money. But of course they always want to ask for some. I have no problem with my parents giving money to people who are doing stuff and actually care about us, but they like to give to these greedy relatives who only call looking for money from Nigeria. but anywayz....Soon we are going to a wedding reception. I love Nigerian weddings first off you don't have to come to the ceremony just show up to the reception lol. That is one thing i don't understand is American weddings, Don't get me wrong they are cute and all but... the service is from 30-1hour then the reception(keep in mind only feeding people finger foods) is about an hour and then it is over... Nigerian weddings...1-2 hour ceremony, the recpetions is all night long, with dancing, eating, partying....having a great time and then coming back home at the morning time

Well I need to go get ready to dance dance dance at the reception

Love

[illmizzkim]

^^ Hey

I was just at a wedding.

[mai_z]

ooh i wanna try!!

Dear CB Diary,

Today I slept in, and didn't wake up till 10. I updated my xanga, and uploaded my pictures of the airshow I went to yesterday. Afterwards, i went to the new supermarket, and did grocery shopping (fun eh?) Then, i went to the dollar store, and bout like 40 dollars worth of random stuff. I bought a spatula, 3 photo albums, headphones, and about 30 other things. (er...gonna go broke!) Later, I went to the mall, and bought 2 shirts and a pair of flip flops.. It was a good day....gonna have lobster for dinner, YAY!

~ MaiZ ~

that was great! boring day tho

[*tweeak*]

dear cb diary(or whatever...),
today, i slept in until noon and then went the forum with my friend sarah, which is like an upscale strip mall. my first stop was the beloved starbucks/barnes and noble, where i bought a java chip frappaccino. YUM! then i went to belk and tried on a ton of ugly clothes just for fun but i got a cute green tank for band camp, because i am a geek and that is the biggest event of the summer. and then i walked all the way home in the dreadful heat, after stopping at cvs to pick up some necessities. when we got home, sarah went home and my friend paige called me and we talked for the next hour while i tried to write this but couldnt because i only had one hand. and tonight i am to babysit for my evil siblings, because my life is fascinating like that.

<3, even though i hate those hearts,
Nicki

[mystical]

Dear CB Diary ^^,

well today i did absolutely nothing....ahh (WORD FILTER) it i'll talk about yesterday.


okay

Dear CB Diary,

today (friday the 25) i woke up around 10 and went to work. walked around gettin paper work for awhile... then i got bored and went into the createblog chat and talk to my fellow Createbloggers for awhile. Then went go get starbucks...drools.. good stuff. After that i got my pizza, i dunno who ordered i just got it. haha i just went up and took it and left. w/e no one said anything went i took it. After that went to back to cube and ate the pizza, chatted some more, messed around, fixed a computer, and yeah that was work. after i got home around 5 and waited for my mom soo we could go to my grandma's house and eat pho =] that was good stuff haha. yeah then after my little cousins wanted to go see shrek 2 so me and them and my older cousins went to go see it. even though it was my 2nd time watching i was still cracking up....haha yeah Puss that cat is like SOOOO awesome haha he's the best.

bye bye journal til next time

(SIGNED HENRY)

[crazeegirl411]

my_papaya, I'm going to have band camp too X]! Hehe, I like this idea, I'll blog tonight =).

[xjjajeengx]

dear createblog diary,
today i have literally worked my butt off trying to finish all my geometry homework from summer school. This is sooo crappy. And my dad is pissing me off like crazy. Why, you ask? Well, first off, he's living with my mom's old bst friend. sick stuff, eh? second off, he expects me to be "mature" about it and so called "bless" his decision. Talk about too much from a 14 year old? anyways. i think im going to go basooookeeeee if i dont do anything soon. bye createblog.
love, grace

ps... moving this to writing because it fits better there.

[d3v1l1ci0us]

dear cb diary,
today ive been so f'ing pissed at my brother, dad came finally and my brother just HAD to piss me off infront of him, i might be a totall-peace girl but when im mad.. im mad.. so i said the fing word so many times in public today, i got a bad influence to my dad.. now he thinks i changed alot.. in a bad way.. i wihs sean would drop dead.. eck.. w.e..

much love,
PearL

[mega_m]

this loks like fun!!

Dear cB diary,
todat i woke REALLY late and then started watching Stuck On You. Afterwards, i ate potatoes for breakfast. Around 1, my dad called me and then told me that I'm gonna be the new web designer (even tho i have no experiece) for his website. After I talked to him i started reading Fruits Basket in my brother's room.
wuv, Megan

[Winter]

Dear createBlog Diary,

Today I had the weirdest dream in my sleep. I dreamt of Henry. - -;; Then I woke up and went online. I chatted with a bunch of people I never met before.

I read something my ex posted. I'm glad he's still alive. I thought he was dead. But anyway Chris came back from Canada today! I missed him like crazy the whole 9 days!

Now I'm gonna go back to procrastinating.

Love,
Ashley

[mystical]

Dear createBlog Diary,

Today I had the weirdest dream in my sleep. I dreamt of Henry. - -;; Then I woke up and went online. I chatted with a bunch of people I never met before.

I read something my ex posted. I'm glad he's still alive. I thought he was dead. But anyway Chris came back from Canada today! I missed him like crazy the whole 9 days!

Now I'm gonna go back to procrastinating.

Love,
Ashley

haha really? wow i'm just everywhere huh

[crazeegirl411]

Dear Createblog Diary,
Since I found something to talk about, I thought I'd write it to you rather than giving you my boring day (where I went out to watch a movie that I didn't end up watching anyway). I love jigsaw puzzles. Sometimes, I think of it as patience...but sometimes, it makes me feel more complete. To fill up the holes from using the pieces they give to you altogether. Um, bad example...but I love the feeling when you finish

[faithin_felix]

glad everyone likes my topic. this is what i did yesterday.

Dear Diary, yesterday i went to a birthday party. i had lots of fun. BBQ, and games. and most of all sandra went. =) and we got...close =)

--Felix June 26 2004

[LatinaLady]

feeling-- unwanted

oh cB diary,
i hate this one boy. i hate him cuz i am really feeling him. i like him so much. i give him the hints. he just tuns things against me its so stupid iknow i have tog et over him but its not as easy as it sounds. i hvae tried. even my friend told me to get over him but i cant. i cant hold back.
i talked to him at 1 am. something liek that he is so stupid. why cant he say something.

-fragile heart.


-i guess its ok for a first-

[Mini]

Dear createBlog[dot]com Diary,

Sunday, June 27, 2004, This morning I had to do some SATs practice, how boring is that. Then around noon, my parents and I went to Columbia Mall to buy some clothes. We went to mostly Bananna Republic. My parents ended up paying around $120 for both of their clothes. I, however, did not see any clothes of interest. Boring day so far. I can't wait to get on the plane next week and go to Texas. I want to spend time with my cousin and my 23 and 24 year old "nephew" and "niece". Dang, they are like double my age yet I am still considered their "uncle". I'm hungry.

Yours truly,
Mini.

[Winter]

Dear Diary,

I went to school today and finished 2 of my verbal tests. I managed to say the word 'grasp' sorta properly. Kinda hard to pronounce it with braces. It kept coming out like 'graphs'. Aced both of them anyway.

Went for extra Malay class. Almost fell asleep. It was so boring. The teacher tries to be funny but really, he's not. At all.

Came back and here I am. Chatted with Henry before he went to sleep. Had another dream of him last night. - -;; I've been talking with him too much.

Love,
Ashley

[Yemmerz]

Dear cB diary,

Over the weekend, I searched for a new job. No one was hiring, and I'm broke. I can't go to New York and California broke can I? Well our block had a strange block party, so I decide to crash. Then the police came because one of the neighbors called since the music was too loud =\ whatever. So I'm about to get a drink, then my sister finds me, and makes me come home. I also found out that I won't be able to see the guy I like for another 2 months [maximum]. I wait about a year and a half just to end up waiting again. Blah.

Fa la la la. Y3|\/|!

[LatinaLady]

dear cb diary
icant belive i woke up t like 1:30. P.M
thats late. i should be liek that. oh goodness i am becoming lazy

[*Kathleen*]

Dear Createblog Diary,
My mom made me feel like crap today, so I cried a good hour and didn't get to see my best friend or a guy I wanted to hang out with. Currently...going into my depression mode for the second time in my life.
-Kathleen

[Note]

dear dary

work was bad. i droped two bowls of soup. i shall nw take a nap.

-jerry

::jerry::

[Mini]

Dear diary,

Monay June 28, 2004, I went to my tutor today. He reviewed grammar with me, how boring yet hard because I never reviewed grammar for 3 years. Then he gave me an SAT prep packet to do, it's 10 pages. 0_o Anyways, I also went to the indoor pool and swam for 30 minutes. It was very relaxing. Blah blah blah..then I went home and turned on my computer. The afternoon of joy had begun.

Yours truly,
Mini (MUAH!)

[faithin_felix]

Dear Diary, June 27, I went to this girl's house, (babygurl_xtacy)'s house. shes on createblog too. yea, took some pics. and hanged around, played basketball with his bro.

June 28, I went out with sandra, she has createblog too, and now i am worryed because she is still not online yet yea, i hugged her soooo many times. and I LOVE HER. my heart only beats for her.

-- faithin felix

[crazeegirl411]

Dear Createblog Diary,
Sooo...sleepy. Couldn't sleep the whole night. Bad dreams. Insomnia. Especially since that dead cockroach was in my mind right before I went to sleep. Mom was in a cranky mood...pshhh. Went to my lessons...and then was in a good mood all rest of the day. *But I don't know what will happen later on.*

[ryfitaDF]

dear createblog diary,

i suck with girls this week. they all eather get mad at me easily or stop liking me or are mean. . the only things that have been keeping me happy are my band, HIM, and Michael Myers killing people.i love michael! he'll never break my heart.
and abbott and costell meet frankenstein...and the munsters... i missed the 48 hour marathon on TV land, though. writing helps, too. i should write more.

bye bye
~lunchbox

[crazeegirl411]

Dear Createblog Diary,
Lies...lies, lies...is all I hear. I'm becoming so paranoid and insecure with the world. I can't trust anyone anymore. Every single time, I just grow more and more, hurt. I can't bring myself to it as I used to. I feel like I'm lying to the world everyday when I'm putting on that smile. I feel really fake. No, I'm actually not blaming it all on me. Not one of my friends actually care to notice. All of them...I mean all of them, they blame me for never telling them how I feel. I can still remember an old friend that I had, she told me I was inconsiderate. It was a time when everything blew out of me...when I told her so many things that went on in my mind on a typed e-mail. I was furious, really furious. She constantly made me feel hurt. She claimed she was my best friend like someone else I used to know. Lies. I was not important to her. She made me feel insecure, if she considered me as a good friend or not. I was only looking forward to when I had a class with her, yet she never gave any appreciation or paid any heed.

Too much hurt...really. Constant guilt. Constant guilt. Constant guilt. I don't know...it may be what I did was wrong, but I was not a whole one-hundred percent to blame. Always saying I keep everything to myself. All of them. I'm tired of it. I'm seriously tired of it. They never thought of how hard it was to keep it inside. To keep all these thoughts inside, and to still walk to school. I can't smile, and your point is? SORRY, if I don't pay attention to you as much. It never seemed like they ever paid attention to ME. Why do I have to think of their side and they can't ever look at my situation? It hurts...it really hurts. I wish to tell it out, but I can't. Just give me some understanding and that's all I expect. But no.

I don't trust any of them anymore. I can't afford it. I can't help it. I'm no longer me. I've changed into a person even I, am foreign to. I've grew into something that I'm afraid of. If I felt trapped then, then what am I now? If I felt lost then...then what is it that I'm feeling now? If it's impossible to erase the pain, I wish to erase all my happiness and great memories, friends, anything to deal with cheerfulness from the past, present, future...so I don't ponder for it so much, so I learn to be used to this.

I'm afraid of the new me.

Sorry, long blog...I had to.

[mystical]

Dear Createblog Diary,
Lies...lies, lies...is all I hear. I'm becoming so paranoid and insecure with the world. I can't trust anyone anymore. Every single time, I just grow more and more, hurt. I can't bring myself to it as I used to. I feel like I'm lying to the world everyday when I'm putting on that smile. I feel really fake. No, I'm actually not blaming it all on me. Not one of my friends actually care to notice. All of them...I mean all of them, they blame me for never telling them how I feel. I can still remember an old friend that I had, she told me I was inconsiderate. It was a time when everything blew out of me...when I told her so many things that went on in my mind on a typed e-mail. I was furious, really furious. She constantly made me feel hurt. She claimed she was my best friend like someone else I used to know. Lies. I was not important to her. She made me feel insecure, if she considered me as a good friend or not. I was only looking forward to when I had a class with her, yet she never gave any appreciation or paid any heed.

Too much hurt...really. Constant guilt. Constant guilt. Constant guilt. I don't know...it may be what I did was wrong, but I was not a whole one-hundred percent to blame. Always saying I keep everything to myself. All of them. I'm tired of it. I'm seriously tired of it. They never thought of how hard it was to keep it inside. To keep all these thoughts inside, and to still walk to school. I can't smile, and your point is? SORRY, if I don't pay attention to you as much. It never seemed like they ever paid attention to ME. Why do I have to think of their side and they can't ever look at my situation? It hurts...it really hurts. I wish to tell it out, but I can't. Just give me some understanding and that's all I expect. But no.

I don't trust any of them anymore. I can't afford it. I can't help it. I'm no longer me. I've changed into a person even I, am foreign to. I've grew into something that I'm afraid of. If I felt trapped then, then what am I now? If I felt lost then...then what is it that I'm feeling now? If it's impossible to erase the pain, I wish to erase all my happiness and great memories, friends, anything to deal with cheerfulness from the past, present, future...so I don't ponder for it so much, so I learn to be used to this.

I'm afraid of the new me.

Sorry, long blog...I had to.

I'm really sorry you feel this way right now, I went throught this too, it was a really dark time in my life. I didnt know my friends anymore like that all dont care or what not about me. I just went along my day with a fake smile and pretend nothing was goin on but yeah i was hurting inside... it really sucked. I have never felt soo sad in my life during that time period, everyday was a pain to get up and face the harsh world and friends. Things finally worked out when one of my friends got really close with me and i felt as if people cared about me. And yeah i told her about alot of things and she help me about of this "period."


Sharie if you ever need someone to talk to....you have my number just pick up the phone.

[Winter]

Dear createBlog diary,

When I am normal, I call those who cut weak. When I am depressed, I think of it as a way to release all the hidden emotion. Yet I've never cut myself before.

No, I still don't dare cut. But I've recently started scratching myself. I use my long nails and scratch my upper arms until the skin comes out and I bleed.

I think it's an improvement. I've always cried myself to sleep, I always 'acted'. But now I feel like I'm doing something. And it just feels so damn good. Maybe I'll start cutting soon. And then, what's left will be death.

[Yemmerz]

Dear createBlog diary,

When I am normal, I call those who cut weak. When I am depressed, I think of it as a way to release all the hidden emotion. Yet I've never cut myself before.

No, I still don't dare cut. But I've recently started scratching myself. I use my long nails and scratch my upper arms until the skin comes out and I bleed.

I think it's an improvement. I've always cried myself to sleep, I always 'acted'. But now I feel like I'm doing something. And it just feels so damn good. Maybe I'll start cutting soon. And then, what's left will be death.

Noo, that's not the way... Don't do it, it will cause more pain.

Dear cB diary,

Yesterday was okay. I talked to Jose on IM, that was way too funny. x) I couldn't find my dad's USB cord, which pissed me off. Then I decided to cook. Randomly I make some noodles. Yum...they actually came out good. Woohoo~ still job searching -_-;;. It sucks that I'm not being funded <needs money badly> I counted 3 times yesterday, and I have come to the final amount of money I have, 23 cents. Blah.
>>yemi

[DesperateXMeasur...]

Dear CB Diary,

I think photobucket always knows when my layouts are at it's mercy. It never works when I need it to. I've also tried every other image hosting site that I know of, and they refuse to host my image.

I'm also on a bad luck streak. Every layout I make, starts with an amazing idea, but when I design it, ends up like crap. It's almost like designer's block.

Anyway, I'm going to my mom's on July 3rd. I don't know if she has internet so I might not be on for a while. She has a boyfriend that she's living with. Meaning, that I am going to have to stay with her and her boyfriend in their apartment. And quite frankly, I am extremely nervous. Almost all of her boyfriends have been scum, besides my dad. She says he's really nice, but then again, she says that about ALL of them.

Sorry for a somewhat long and useless entry.

-Brit

[silver-rain]

Dear CB diary,
its the second day of summer, and i'm sooo bored. my brother and i have this schedule for going on the computer, and right now, its my turn. but when i'm not on the computer, i have nothing to do. i've already read all the interesting books. i really need to get out, but i need to do something with some people.
i tried to go running again this morning, but i was too tired. i will go running tomorrow! i will...
anyways, i'm addicted to playing towers. after my friend re-introduced it to me, its all i've been playing.... hmm, i think i'll go play now. too bad i'm not good...


- linda

[islandkiss]

dear diary,

*sigh.
I still miss him. I want to be more than friends again. only if I could have another chance, if I could just hold him in my arms again..
I just can't seem to get over him. I know, he was my first bf and I need to have more experience but I really loved him a lot. I was talking to a friend the other day and I told him that I still had feelings for my ex. Well, since he's bff with my ex, he said that he wouldn't tell him anything and I made him promise.. this is kinda like what I told him " I heard that he hugged someone and that they like each other. I dunno. I just can't stop liking him" and our whole conversation was just based on that.

I trusted him and everything but he just ended up telling my ex that I saw him hugging another girl which, I didn't. and my ex got from that, that I still had feelings left for him. The reason why I'm so upset is because he was just leading me on and sh!t. and then he just ended a yr's relationship. argh, why can't I let go of him.. I know he isn't worthy of me....

[faithin_felix]

dear createblog diary,
today i kissed her, well a lot more happened, but i kissed her. lip to lip. hahaha, first time. omg, i loved that feeling. i also want to thank you god for making today such a wonderful day.

-- faithin felix

[waccoon]

Dear Diary:

Is it possible to be this smitten?


Waccoon Out.

[jaeman]

Dear cB Diary,

I love createBlog. It's the best.

-the_average_xangan.

[LatinaLady]

yes its me agian. i have to write....
theres no one i can talk to. no eone wants to hear it.
but i love that boy.
oh my goodness
if he were to hold me and give me a kiss it would be the best one EVER. i would not complain do anything negative. i would be the happiest girl

[crazeegirl411]

yes its me agian. i have to write....
theres no one i can talk to. no eone wants to hear it.
but i love that boy.
oh my goodness
if he were to hold me and give me a kiss it would be the best one EVER. i would not complain do anything negative. i would be the happiest girl

Awww...I'm here to listen

dear createblog diary,
today i kissed her, well a lot more happened, but i kissed her. lip to lip. hahaha, first time. omg, i loved that feeling. i also want to thank you god for making today such a wonderful day.

-- faithin felix

That sounds really sweet, feeling glad for you

Dear createBlog diary,

When I am normal, I call those who cut weak. When I am depressed, I think of it as a way to release all the hidden emotion. Yet I've never cut myself before.

No, I still don't dare cut. But I've recently started scratching myself.  I use my long nails and scratch my upper arms until the skin comes out and I bleed.

I think it's an improvement. I've always cried myself to sleep, I always 'acted'. But now I feel like I'm doing something. And it just feels so damn good. Maybe I'll start cutting soon. And then, what's left will be death. 

WHAT?!?! I know when I write, it's scary how suicidal it sounds, but I never knew it sounds THAT scary. I hope you're not freakin serious Don't be selfish.

Dear Createblog Diary,
Morning was boring, but when I headed into createBlog Chat, it was so funny . Mostly everyone left...but we had the kinkiest chat ever ...one of those times I'll never forget, haha. *added to my unforgettable memories*

[Winter]

Dear createBlog diary,

I found out today, my first love never loved me. He was playing me. The pain, it's unbearable. It's just... Gawd I dunno what to say right now...

<--- that smile's not correct, it should be a maniacal smile. I got blood all over my T-shirt sleeve.

[eboarder2020]

Dear Diary;

I guess its luck but its the same Hard luck... I guess its love but its like she said, Love is like a role that we play...I could die from the words that you say



God DAMMIT...So today was teh first day I've seen megan in months... I met her and her friends at the beach hoping to finnally get to talk to her, see whats been on her mind, and to meet and talk to new and old friends... It wasnt that. Today was a really hard day. Seeing megan for the first time today was so hard. Her boyfriend was there... Need i say what and how i felt??? It was so hard to look at her and not feel anything. Its so hard to see her and not remind myself how much I miss her. I miss her... I miss everything. I even miss the f**king arguments. As the time on the beach passed i realized that I went for the wrong reasons. I went because I missed her... And going there wasnt going to make my missing her ease up, instead it made me miss her more. As I drove home i kept telling myself to stay strong, to hold my head up high, to let it go. But the more i think about it, the more it hurts. The more it hurts, the more i break. It hurts when I think about her. I always think about her, and whenever I do, I catch myself asking if she misses me...Does she think about me, does she ever think about me when shes bored, when shes hurt, when shes lost, when shes happy?

Its just not fair. I've herd about megans new boyfriends. I've herd what they did, I've herd there past... It hurts to know that they arent being the best person for her. It hurts because i know megans criteria of guys. I know what she wants. I know what she demands. And these guys dont even meet half the things she asks. They dont go out of there way for her, they dont become truthful, they didnt love her like I did. How did all these guys get there way into her heart and not go through the trouble i did. I went through it all... I had to prove my self to her more than once, I was the one who held her high when she was low...They got it all, and here I am the guy who did all he can to be the man she wanted, needed, and asked for, and Im the guy suffering.

I read on someones site that says "Do you know this person...I replied...I used too". Thats what I would tell someone if they asked if i knew megan. I dont know her anymore. I miss the old her. Granted I havent really talked to her in two months but where did the old megan go. The old megan i used to remember was the type of girl who only said things when she felt that they would help the other person. The old megan who wouldnt settle for second best, the old megan who never let someone in her heart unless they proved themselves worthy? Where was the old megan that whenever she walked by everyone could notice the passion and fire in her eyes to be better? What happend to the megan who was home on time, who didnt sneak out, who really thought about things before doing them, who cared more about her friends then herself, the one who wrote letters, who smiled at me, who held me, who kissed me, who told me she loved me...Whered she go? Please tell me where my megan went???

The memories I keep are from a time like then
I put on my paper so I could come back to them
Someday i'm hopin to close my eyes and pretend
That this crumpled up paper can be perfect again

[Caitlin]

Dear Createblog Diary,
I cant understand what I really truly feel anymore.. I cant help myself but the guy I am falling back in love with is my ex boyfriend. Its like every move he makes hyponotizes me & I'm too chicken to even say Hi to him. I dont understand whats been going on lately.. everyone is like ho he still likes you he wants to go out with you again because he is in love with you but then I dont know if that is true. & Then theres David.
I should just ask him & clear up everything. People really suck when you say just one thing & they totally overreact about it. grow up..
this summer has been so boring

__more later <3 Caitlin

[crazeegirl411]

Aw, eboarder2020, people change. I've seen change of people since I was very young, from my sister to my friends, to other people I don't even know very well. It just happens, and there's no complete reason for it. I also hated it when people change...but when I see myself reacting to things differently, I notice that I'm changing as much as I hate it, as much as I don't want the way it is going. Maybe she couldn't help it either. If you ponder of her so much, you should talk to her. Two months. It's not a short time, but even though it's not a long time either, you should work it out. Do something instead of thinking and hurting. Solve your worries. I know, not as easy said than done, but you want something good for her, right? I don't exactly know the situation, but that's only my opinion.

[hybrid]

Dear Createblog diary,

Today I saved the my town from town destruction. I also saved a child from starvation by getting him to eat pizza. You know this is a lie right? I haven't done anything but take nature walks. I'm so lame. I need to die.

Love,
Kim Jr.

[LatinaLady]

Awww...I'm here to listen

thanks sweetie =)

Dear diary,
my shoulders are sore. i slept all wiered and thats the thing that made me all sore. ugh! should have know. i need to do stuff. i cantbe at home on the computer. its summer vacation i have to go out.

[sheddingtears]

Love the idea.

Dear Diary,

Went to the Decathlon Club today with my best friend again. For the second time in a row. Tomorrow will mark the third. Yeah, just getting some exercise in. Then yeah, got home and went online. He came back today, from his one trip. It makes no difference though since we rarely talk to each other anyways. I'm trying to move on this summer. Just gotta focus more on my grades.

<3

[*NatiMarie*]

Dear Diary,
Today I feel like socking people and smacking them straight in the face while seeing their putred expressions fade away while my fist slowly drops down. I feel like a piece of crap that has landed in the middle of an abandoned road.
Okay, that was a bunch of BS. Okay, today I saw Spider Man 2, Tobey is hot...tomorrow I might go to a theme park. Yippee.
Bye!
Love,
Natalie

[XaZnX07]

dear diary

today was pretty boring didnt really do much but went out to eat with the family yummm so much food i was realy full lols then had fortune cookies yum

heres my fortunes

1)Every man is a volume if yo u know how to read him
? i dont get this one ?
2)Your courage will bring you honor

3)you have an ability to snse and know higher truth




.:tony:.

[crazeegirl411]

Dear Createblog Diary,
My sleeping schedule is growing crazy!! I didn't know someone can sleep 17 hours until I did it . I had a lot of dreams...but one dream was pretty memorable. In fact, all his dreams are memorable. I think I'm obsessed. That's what. And it's pointless. I don't know what I'm saying. These are one of the times when I feel like I cannot write. Uh.

[eboarder2020]

Dear Creatblog Diary,

I think its time I take this weekend to be a little bit alone and to think about me and the things I want/need/ask/wish for in like... I guess knowing those things is half the battle in this struggle i have.

[Winter]

Dear createBlog Diary,

I think I'm feeling much better now. I started talking with my ex. And he's been really helpful. He helps me with my schoolwork, he cheers me on, he's just so much help. Iono what I'd do without him to help me.

Love,
Winter

[SarahxJoy]

Dear CreateBlog Diary,
It's 3:25 AM and I haven't really anything to do. So I'm making my first entry into this diary here. Tomorrow around 3:00 PM, I'm headed to Leon's party, since he's turning fourteen. I'm looking forward to it, because I get to have some fun and hang out with my friends again, since this summer hasn't really been all that eventful.
In five days, my dad is coming home from Italy for the rest of the month. We're planning on driving through Reno, then Washington (where we'll stay with my great aunt for a night), then head to Vancouver in Canada. We're planning on staying there for three nights. So that'll be nice. I'll be sure to bring my digital camera and takes lots of pics, so I can show my friends when I return.
My friend Paige, showed me this touch-typing test from typingtest.com, and it's weird, but it's kind of getting addicting. LoL. It's nice to see my improvements in my typing. Oh, well I just recieved an e-mail from Paige and Jacy, so I'll end this now and stop boring others with this pathetic life of mine.

~Sarah Joy

P.S.
I feel like an airhead for some reason!

[hybrid]

Dear Diary,

I need to die.
Scratch that, We all need to die.

Seriously,
Kim Jr.

[*jooleeah*]

lilangelgurlpnai Posted on Jul 3 2004, 11:19 AM
  Dear Diary,

I need to die.
Scratch that, We all need to die.

Seriously,
Kim Jr. 

what are you talking about?? you're so nice.

Dear Diary,
The day just started for me. Kind of.
I'm really bored.
And sick.
great.
-julia

[BeyondElite]

Dear CreateBlog Diary,
Tomorrow, i'm gonna release my xangas of the month in my site! I can't wait! And yeah...tomorrow will be Independence day! Yay! I'm so exceited!
Love,
Ron

[onenonly101]

This is from Friday

Friday already. Thank God it is July finally things shall be picking up. I want to see the notebook on Saturday, but you know those parents like to act a straight fool alot of the time so...Sunday is the 4th, and Chealese's birthday. Happy birthday girl, eventhough i will see you on Sunday. If her slacker behind will be at church. We are going to the church's thing and then fireworks at lenox. Monday-Bar b que(my sisters hooks that up every year), Wednesday-Six Flags, wuuu it better not rain, it has been like freakin monsoon weather over here, itz making me mad. Then friday KAYANE WEST...Jesus Walks with me! Can't wait for that. I am startin my birthday countdown and houston countdown.

23 more days till my birthday

20 days till Houston

I went up to the Lenox area with two of my sisters. We ate at Fat Matt's rib shack...mmmmm that tasted so good. Then we went to this Italian ice cream shop and that also tasted good. I realized i hardly ever eat during the summertime. People have said i look like i have lost weight but I don't think so. I shall post a pic at the end of this post that i took yesterday, i don't like the picture too much but it is alright. I realzied then when we were out i have stopped looking at people. I mean allthe way. Man this year i am going to be focused ON ME and ONLY ME. It is tiring worrying about others. I love people but...I am a bad friend during the summertime because i hate talking on the phone and then those people upstairs i swear never want me to go and do ANYTHING. I am goign to tell Brittney i am coming over her house soon. So i can get ou of this place. Then i need to go to Chealse's house also. then i need to walk up to farmer's market and visit Illiana working. Too bad my parents don't know most of my friends cuz if they did then i could be visiting them. Hmph well everyone is home now so i will be getting off for people complain i am always on the computer.

Love

[XaZnX07]

dear diary


today has just begun alot of things yet to come and tomorow is July 4 witch means i will be on my way to california fun fun dont worry i will still visit cb i cant live with out it lols well i will edit this post later on what else i did today hehe





.:tonY:.

[eboarder2020]

Dear Cb Diary,

4th of july is going to be another lonley day. Alot of my friends are gonna watch fireworks with their significant others. I however wanna goto a firework show but no one wishes to come with. I dont wanna spend my 4th all alone. If anyone would like to goto a firework show with me please ask...

*sniff Sniff*

[faithin_felix]

Dear Createblog Diary,
this few days my internet is not working as well, so can't really post as much. but i had fun. i watched spiderman, hang out with this youth group, Bubble Tea fight
and slept over. =)

-- faithin felix

[inthemudhole]

Dear createBlog Diary,

Hiya. I had an okay day today. I'm extremely tired, however. I've been awake for 39 hours and 47 minutes.. Yes, I kept track. ^_^
I'm shooting for 48 hours or more..
I hung out with my friend Zena today..
I miss Alec.
Oh, well. He's coming back tomorrow for the 4th. =-] I can't wait.
I miss him..
My new shirt roxx0rs. It is an Offspring shirt. :)
Anyway. I'm bored, tired, and a tad bit sad.
I feel like I belong here a bit now, though.
I mean, I was #1 on top 10 posters for the day for a while today.. and I'm now a tad bit more than halfway to the big 1,000 posts.
I feel like I belong.. a little bit.

Well, I guess I'm out.

--Brie

[ryfitaDF]

dear cb diary,

the forth of july is lame. it always reminds me that summer doesn't last forever . oh well. August is coming up which will be fun. i got 3 huge shows i'm lookin forward to.

it's hot out. grrr. i wish i had a drum set. i been playin the air drums alot and i know how good i'm doing it! i realy want a real set! then i'll be a real renecance man . i lvoe my guitars n stuf. and girls are so hott. i wanna kiss them all. laura has a crush on me and i find it laughible for 2 reasons: 1) she has a b'f and 2) it's me.

i need a haircut.

~lunchbox

[LiNHy POO]

oo cool!!

dear diary,
today i went to my friend ricky's house!!! we played video games and hung outside talking and playing sum b-ball!!! then i came home.. took a nap... and got ready to go to hang out with sum other friends... we went to see spiderman 2... very good movie!!!!! then came home... and talked with my boyfriend... haha pretty much it!

[bobbster]

Dear createBlog Diary,
I saw Spiderman 2 today. It sucked big time booty. Then, I went home and ate some ..rolls..thingy. Yerp! It's 1:43 AM. Meaning it's the Fourth of July already! I'm not gonna do anything for it. No fireworks or anything. =/ Stay home and make out with my pillow is the plan. Phantom Memory has a great ending song. I'm listening to it right now. I'm also in the createBlog chatroom. We're talking about Yugi Oh!....
-______-;; Thanks for listening, sweet watermelon gelatin.

---Bob

[*CEP*]

Dear CB Diary,
I made it through a day without taking a shower.
I'll try not to take a shower again tomorrow, but I doubt I can.
We'll see.

- Chinkieeyedpnoi

[Justingamemaster]

This is neat.

Dear Createblog Diary,
Today I went to the BMX track with the male parental unit to go check out the big NBL tournament they had there. There were tons of hot guys, but all were racing, so I didn't get a chance to talk to them. I wanted to invite Sarah (my bestest best buddy, for all that don't know), but she was sleeping when I called. When I arrived at my house, I called her again. We tried to come up with a plan for the day, but realized nothing would work out, so she went and delivered her candles for her youth group instead. We plan to do something on Monday because her and Jolie (our other friend) are planning to go to a concert.

Edit // Last night, I painted my nails and they're all prettyful pink now! *Giggles*

-Kathleen

(Is that how it's supposed to be? )

whats a male parental unit...is that your dad?

[ryfitaDF]

whats a male parental unit...is that your dad?

you are correct.

[crazeegirl411]

Dear createBlog Diary,
I hate "selfish." I think I hated it more than I thought I would. It's another factor to why I hate myself so much. Because I feel so selfish. And then I have to contradict with myself...when they're sad I'm sad, when they're happy I'm happy. But that's not what it seems. It's natural, and I hate that. I have no say on my emotions. I have no power over how I feel or what kind of a person I am. It's like I'm being pushed here or there by everyone. I feel abused. I feel unlike myself, and incomplete. Lost...but never found. I want to know the feeling of being found again. But then...I'll be let down once again. Like any other time.

I've slipped myself away from reality again. I told myself last time, "not again...not again..." but I can't help it. Who could resist? That true appreciation given. That's the point though. It's not TRUE appreciation. They'll forget you. They'll change. They won't talk to you. Everything will fade and you will ponder to yourself why you fell in that trap. Again. I HATE IT I HATE IT!!!

Surely someone will kill me. Surely someone will believe me when I tell them what a selfish little whore I am. Surely someone will tell me I am one. So I don't have to "pretend." So I don't have to keep it inside so much. So I don't have to feel so trapped inside myself. I want to tell someone. I want to tell someone all of this. I want to tell someone about this pain that's never going to stop. Ever. Every second. I can't stop fighting with myself. I can't get over this. I feel horrible. No matter how many times I smile...it couldn't replace anything. It couldn't erase anything. I'm not the person I pose to be.

Why, f*ck it, I'm a hypocrite. I'm a f*cking poser. I hate for caring how the world thinks about me. Why am I caring? Why do I give a damn? Why can't I just let it all out of who I am and all the crap that's in me? Someone I don't know is taking over me. I hate everything that I am right now. I hate selfish people. I hate posers. I hate people who say "I hate...". I hate jealous people. I hate it. I hate lazy people. I hate me.

I seriously want someone to kill me. Run me over. Jump out the street. I'm not that strong. I'm just really weak. Like people always tell me. Like my "friends" always tell me. Even her. I'm even believing someone I loathe the most besides me. She says I'm too emotional. I laugh at her for hating me because I'm too emotional. But I laugh at myself because I'm hating myself for the same f*ckin thing. Everyone's been telling me the answer my whole life.

Even my sister hates me. She could stand everyone but me. I don't see how we're siblings. I don't see how we're related. I don't see how I'm related to anyone. I don't get along with anyone. I can't...do it. I don't feel love. Not anymore. I've had the lack of it for so long...I just feel lost and unloved again even if you shower me with the most care and love you could muster.

I feel hopeless. I feel like it's never going to end. It's been going on for 14 years. I feel like it's going to be too long. I'm dreading it. I'm dreading the rest. I feel like a failure. Worthless. Crap. Sh*t. What's wrong with me? Don't I have a normal and good enough life? Why do I have such a f*cked up mind?

I'm going crazy. And when nobody takes me seriously, I go even more crazier.

I wish I could tell someone. It's really painful. Really...painful. I want someone to kill me.

I don't feel like going out tomorrow. I don't feel like seeing anyone anymore. I feel like trapping myself and just cry. Cry. And wish to die.

[SarahxJoy]

Dear CreateBlog Diary,
(Since technically, my day has just barely started, I'll talk about "yesterday." LoL.) Hey peoplez!! Dang, just got home about twenty minutes ago, and I just got out of the shower. Damn that party was hella' fun!! LoL. I took some pics, but then the batteries on my digital camera died on me!! Which..sucks. Ah well. Nina was actin' like a model and I took pics of her. LoL, they came out prettyful. I'd upload them now and post 'em and all that good stuff, but I just started recharging the batteries, so...Nina! You'll have to wait a while to jack my pics and post 'em on your xanga!! LoL. Mhm. So it was all good and fun. Here's how it goes..(or at least to how I remember it) Oh and.. Happy 14th Birthday Leon!!

We were about the second group of people to arrive at Leon's place. We ate some and the adults were just chatting and the usual. Then Tanya, Myron (dunno if that's how you spell it), and Thomas come over. So yeah. Rozelle and I hang out for a while, since she was following me again, and Gabriel was following Leon. LoL. Rozelle and I were just walking around the house and stuff. There was a band there in the garage, and they're not so bad. Pretty good. Lol.

Mm, anyway, Myron and John start playing some DDR upstairs, then we move it downstairs, since the tv down there is bigger. Rozelle, Leon, and I just watch 'em a while. And so on. Nikko and Nina finally come over, and they play some DDR 'n' stuffage. Mm..then we moved upstairs again. LoL.

For a long while, we're all just talking and things like that, the usual, having a few laughs. Later on, Tanya, Myron, and Thomas leave. So yeah. Then..erm..what else did we do? Oh! We went outside to see what's going on..or something like that. The bands leaves and stuff, talk a while, then we go into the garage. LoL, we started playin' hide-and-seek in the garage with the lights off. Last time was fun, so we tried it again. Lmao. It was hilarious! I was laughing so hard when I heard Nikko scare Nina in the dark. Yeah..during the game..there was some accidental touches. When Leon was it Nikko and I were just sitting on the carpet and all that. So then I stand up when I feel Leon getting close, and suddenly I feel someone grab my leg, so I reach down and try to feel who it is. Accidentally, I touched Leon's butt. LoL. Then Nikko touched mine..ACCIDENTALLY!! Sheesh, what are you people thinkin'? Get your mind out of the gutter. LoL. But..err..yeeeaaah..

After we kinda' get tired of that, we bring out the cake and sing Leon "Happy Birthday". Rozelle, Nina, and I had a plan. That when Leon had his piece of cake in his plate, Nina would push it into his face. We even asked his mom for permission if we could do it. But..sadly, when she tried, it didn't work! But oh well. We got him good when Nina and I started running through the house after Leon with cake in our hands. We got him good. I couldn't stop laughing. Then we started going after the other guys. Nikko was runnin' and then he stopped in front of the counter in the kitchen, so I went to his other side and smashed a huge piece on his cheek! LoL. Nina got him on the other. Lmao. He said it went up his nose though.. Sorry 'bout that Nikko! Lols. Nina got me though. She got me on my cheek and some of it when on my hair, but it's all in good fun. When we tried to get John, he was running like crazy. Lmao. I only got him when we calmed down and he was playing DDR against Nikko. Hahaha. Funneh.

Um, we gave Nikko, Nina, and Auntie Shiela a ride to their house, so it was fun. John, Nikko, Nina, and I were all crammed in the backseat, but we had some laughs. The moon was yellow. Well..orangeish-yellow..LoL. Weird. We saw fireworks when we got close to their house. So prettyful.Then umm..we went into their house for a bit. We saw Mark, that was cool. And guys..lemme tell you..damn, I LOVE their house!!!! It's hella' big and so nicely decorated. LoLs. While we were there though, we just spent most of our time in Nikko's room. He was showin' us some funny stuff from homestarrunner.com..I think it was called. Lol. I had a slice of pizza while we were there, because I really didn't eat all that much while at Leon's. Good pizza. Haha.

Sorry for the long entry..? ;;

[ComradeRed]

CB Diary,

Today I arrived in Malis, the second largest city and Aeonian Port of the Imperial Province of Pontus. The barbarian tribes to the South are engaged in a major revolt. Having been assigned here, under command of the great and brilliant general Traes Ptolemais, I am fully ready to crush this new rebel uprising.

The rebel forces, including many fearsome Scythian tribes, are focused inland, to the South, especially around the cities of Ouranos and Dura Europos. While the coast proper is secured from invasion, rebel raiders have penetrated as far as the capital of Pontus, just ten miles inland, at times.

I had a great talk with the General Ptolemais today. He informed me of the thousands of loyal Imperial soldiers recently slaughtered at the battle of the Cynoscephale Plains. I, however, am not afraid.

I did some combat trials. I love the new Decatian swords. Their iron is very sharp and durable. I used one to execute a captured prisoner of war today. I am very happy that the entire XVI Legion is using these new weapons. Together, we should have no problem to strike fear into those who dare oppose the Emperor of Caltha.

[EmeraldKnight]

CB Diary,

Today I arrived in Malis, the second largest city and Aeonian Port of the Imperial Province of Pontus. The barbarian tribes to the South are engaged in a major revolt. Having been assigned here, under command of the great and brilliant general Traes Ptolemais, I am fully ready to crush this new rebel uprising.

The rebel forces, including many fearsome Scythian tribes, are focused inland, to the South, especially around the cities of Ouranos and Dura Europos. While the coast proper is secured from invasion, rebel raiders have penetrated as far as the capital of Pontus, just ten miles inland, at times.

I had a great talk with the General Ptolemais today. He informed me of the thousands of loyal Imperial soldiers recently slaughtered at the battle of the Cynoscephale Plains. I, however, am not afraid.

I did some combat trials. I love the new Decatian swords. Their iron is very sharp and durable. I used one to execute a captured prisoner of war today. I am very happy that the entire XVI Legion is using these new weapons. Together, we should have no problem to strike fear into those who dare oppose the Emperor of Caltha

Wow Minda... did you write that? That's pretty darn good..

[ComradeRed]

Of course I wrote it lol.

[eboarder2020]

Dear CB Diary


As i stared in amazment at the glowing night I come to realize I've found the best way to describe a perfect kiss. For so long a people have been trying to describe a kiss, or better yet, compare it to something we all know about. Its tonight where I may have found something close to that perfect kiss. Before every big firework show there is so much talk, and so much curiosity of what the firework show may hold. Before everything there is the anticipation that everyone thinks about. The questions of "Whats it gonna be like" or "Is it gonna be long, short, colorful" is always asked amoung the crowd. And just like every kiss thats been waited for, you always ask yourself, how is this kiss going to turn out, how is this going to happen, what will it be like. We've all been there, and we all know what kind of questions we ask ourselves. And then "BOOM". The boom isnt the horrible sound of a mistake, but the boom is the heartbeat we have when the kiss happens. The beat may be irregular, and loud, nervous, and rushed, but its strong and passionate. And as the night sky is lit of with different colors, it shows how beutiful and liveley, and noticable your perfect kiss is. Slowly and softly the sparks turn to afterglow and your just there in the moment finally realizing that your perfect kiss has just happend to you. When the show is all said and done, your left lightheaded and live. Your body doesnt know whether to stand up, or sit down, and your left breathless in your shoes only longing for that feeling again...

I spent my 4th of July at a simple park with a beutiful girl by my side and great friends who just wanted to be with people who cared about them. This would be my second year not being with someone on this 4th of July. Which is sad but its funny how i always wanted to kiss under a glowing night sky, how I always wanted to be with someone I love under the burning after glow. Its also funny how everyone in my group wanted the same thing. There was no Eric, no kelly, no matt, no Jon, no Sean, no Rachel, no Alea, no significant others in our group. We were all single, and we all missed someone. As I looked around at my friends I can tell that this 4th or July was meant to be celebrated with someone else, but all of us, had nothing else... As we all sat in our little group, some of us in huddles, others in chairs, some just sitting next to each other, there was nothing but smiles all around. Our night sky was painted so beutiful and so prestine that it can never be repeated. For many people watching the same show, it was a celebration, but for people in the group it was so much more. It wasnt just a firework show, but for us 10, it was like watching a whole 20 minetes of bright and elegant shooting stars... We wished on every single one of them...

[SarahxJoy]

Dear CreateBlog Diary,
Well diary, I haven't really done anything special today, despite it's being Independence Day. I took pictures of fireworks from my loft window. It was nice to watch. While I was on my mom's balcony, I was just taking pictures. I took one of this really pretty red one, when all of a sudden a scud comes at me, and it was still on fire. I told my friend about it and he's glad I wasn't hurt. (He's so sweet..LoL.) But instead, it just landed right next to me. I didn't exactly want to wait and get hit by another flamed scud, so I went inside.

For the most part, I've just been online. Posting around here at CreateBlog[dot]com, I'm addicted..officially. Nina's cousin went to her house today, so that was cool. We were talking on AIM and I saw her cousin through webcam on YIM. She seems like a nice enough person. So it's cool that I met her. I've really nothing to do today, or tomorrow, or the day after. My life right now can be described in one big word, "BOREDOM".

~Sarah

P.S.
Dad comes home in two days, from Italy, for a month.

[eboarder2020]

dear cB diary,
my second tym writtin this cuz my othr one got deleted cuz my IE messed up..blahh i had so much written down..that i dont even care wat i wrote n e more..lifes just been gay lately..i hate it..yes i am being selfish but u kno wat?...i just wanna die, i actually cant wait til my life ends..that'll b the perfect day..blehh i just hate the pressure frum my parents..i hate the way my "friends" treat me...they talk behind my back all the tym and nvr care 4 me.and i guess that made me notice how much i dont like them..im just an outcast.a lozer..sumone with no friends..i nvr realized that until now..hmm ppl mite think this is PMS..but it could b..but im just venting out everything i keep inside to myself..everything that i have bottled up in me can just come out now...

i feel lyk ive been makin everyone's life miserable..i feel like i've been a bad "friend" and mayb thatz y myfriendz all hate me now.cuz of my actions and wat i've done..i deserve to die..i was even told that todai..sumone told me im a 2-faced slut and i should die now..hrm..so wat if im 2 faced..i bet alotta ppl r..i may seem lyk a happy person on the outside..but u have no idea watz goin on in the inside..no one does..onli sharie understnads..im glad i met her..she's a tru friend..onli othr ppl..blehh itz poem tym..

cuttin myself..i feel the pain..
watching my blood go down the drain..
tears of hate come out and sing..
"i hate this wrld, i hate everything"

wishing for that special day to come so bad...
wishing for thingz i've longed to have...
wishing for sumone to love me for hoo i am..
wishing for sumone to look past the "happy" person i am..

seeing a friend turn their back on me one by one,
thinkin that its all just alot of fun..
watching eyes stare at me as i pass by..
az im wondering why oh why..

why haz God put me in this place..
why God why? am i a big disgrace?
i hate everything in this wrld..
y has it appeard?
i hate this wrld..y cant i dissapear?..
©aZn_KyOoTi3_x3©

yea just made that it sux alot..but w/e..
n e wayz my nose iz bleeding now frum all this madness going on..blehh this has nvr happend b4..i dont know y i'm so mad..ive nvr felt this much anger b4..i cant even handle it now..blehh itz almost 6AM..i dont know y im still up..blehh i have insomnia..nvm..blehh w/e..im callin it a night..

x33~
ashley

Hey hun...We all have our bad times...Some of them last longer then others...Hang tight babe you'll make it through... Your a CB family member, and we're pullin for ya K...Take care and god speed

[haejung012]

CB Diary,
I spent the whole day trying to figure out my chemistry homework because I missed three days of class. I went crazy not understanding anything and unfortunately I still don't understand all of it. However, I understand some of it because my friend helped me and because I was blasting my music that helps me think. Well, back to chemistry homework...
-jennie-

[faithin_felix]

dear createblog diary,

these few days, my net is not working properly so i couldn't post as much, but i'll try my best now, i am leaving on vacation in 10 days, i'll miss her a lot. and i didn't get to celebrate canada day on createblog either...so much for my canadian spirit. ><" i'll wait till next year i guess. thank you for everything.

-- faithin felix

[Luster Soldier]

Dear createblog diray,

My bio dad called again today. Since he left me and my mom, our relationship is sucking. We're drifting apart. We could no longer understand each other like we used to. He's in china doing his own thing, so no wonder that has to happen. I visit him once a year, but that's not helping anything. Yeah, I don't know how this is going on. Since he made the wrong decision to have an affair, I guess he caused his own suffering.

Today, hanged out with my friends. I'm so quiet, even in front of my friends. My personality wasn't like this before, I don't know why I changed

Dean

[faithin_felix]

dear createblog diary,

today she came over and i went to her house and also i went to volunteer. thank you for all the fun i had today. i miss her very much. love her lots, hope tommorow will be a better day.

-- faithin felix

[eboarder2020]

Dear CB diary,

Im so frustrated with myself... Every girl i seem to like seems to always have a boyfriend, or likes a guy madly that i cant even make my way in. I hate falling for girls who I have no future with... Its like I have no chance in getting what I want. What do I lack, what does he have that I dont? Does he listin to you like I do, does he tell you everything you want to hear? Maybe the saying really is true...Nice guys finish last

[LatinaLady]

Dear mr.Createblog diary.
so again someone annonoymous sent me an IM sayingi was a hoe. how am i one.. ok scrtach that out. but if people are gonna start crap they shouldn't keep all quiet and not say who they are. that bugs me alot. and this isnt the first time. maybe same person. i dont know. its so annoying

[faithin_felix]

dear createblog diary,
today she came over again and together we went to our friends house. i had fun. good times, and good memories.

-- faithin felix

[joanna0304]

7/8/04
Dear diary,
2day was same as always, Boring. So ne way i have nuttin 2do so i decided to write in here. Well 2morrow is gonna be Friday man this week past really damn fast well i hope next week i'll have sumtin to do n not be bored all summer, well that's it 4 now.

[pbear]

Dear diary,

I've discovered that my crush of 4 years has a girlfriend whom he crushed on for 2 years.
Sigh.
It's time to move on, I guess.

[hybrid]

Dear Diary,

The end of the world is coming.
Soon.
Hopefully, today.
I need to die.
Stupid dream.
Stupid oracle.

And I want chocolate mousse cake before I die.
And that special somebody too.
Pfft, I'm so lame.

-- Kim Jr.

[onenonly101]

Dear CB,

Yesterday was so much fun. We went to Six Flags and i'll fill in the details later. right now i need some help. my bestfriend or used to be i don't know and i haven't talked in months. We had been bestfriends since 7th grade but then this year our 9th grade year i went to a different school and i would always be the one who called her throughout oru relationship and i just got sick of it. It would piss me off that i would be the one calling her and listening to her. I love listening to people because i don't know people like to tell me their problems and i like to know them so i can be a good friends. But i also need someone to do that for me. I mean we were the best of friends.. ..but now we haven't talked in monthsI wrote her this on July 1st and still haven't sent it to her, should i?:

July 1st
Hey Mary

I'm listening to nuck if you buck right now because my parents just made me mad. Mostly my dad, but now i'm listening to music so i feel so much better. But anyways that isn't why i wrote this letter. We haven't talked in a long time and that isn't right. Our friendship was such a strong solid one and now...something had just made it crumble. Because a lack of communication between us. There had been some issues i hwas struggling with and in order for me to get over them i have to tell you what they were.
#1 Race. It is so stupid I know but this year I made a huge change from a majority white(well a really diverse school) to an all black school. I know I've changed as a person. All my life i have been around a diverse gorup of people I mean my friends were black,white,hispanic,asian, and everything in between. Now I just have black friends with the exception of illiana(mexican) and van(Vietanmese). And I don't know, i guess i felt different by having a white bestfriend. Then during April i realized what does it matter? I love poeple of all races. I realized that no one even cares about who I am friends with and what they look like. Me having friends of every race makes me who I am and has helped me experience many things.
#2 Change. I know I've changed and i know you've changed. But I've been afraid that we have changed so much our relationship would've suffered. But I thought that we can change together or grow together and I prefer growing together.
#4 Communication. In the middle of the year I was going to call you and say maybe our friendship should've ended at Peachtree. I was going to do that because I was angry, angry that you never called me. The type of person I am is someone to depend on. I like for people to lean on me and for me to take charge, but sometimes I am sick of that role and I need someone to take lead and for them to initailize the ocnversation. But then i decided not to call you because that is a stupid thing to end a friendship over. But I do need you to know that I would appreciate other initializing a conversation with me.
Okay, those were the 3 things that were bothering me. But Ialso want to say this:
Thank yout so much for being there when Chi-Chi died. It meant so much to me. I mean when I called you to tell you I couldn't even get the words outbut you understood. And i love you so much girl.
My parents act a fool sometimes. But other than blaming me fore stuff and saying no to me they are alright. Your parents seem klike nice good people so you better be treating them right. I have some many questions i want to ask you.
I am so sorry and i meant to call you on the 1 year anniversary of your aunt and cousin but i want you to know that i was praying for you. Well that is everything I had to say, now it is your turn. I love you alot so call me.

Love

Uche

That is the entire letter, so ya'll tell me what's up

[h22fanatik]

Dear Diary,

Life is GOOD! Just got a prelude and my bf already got me mods=) i am soo spoiled =/ work has been okay...10 hr days r real blowers tho...i never have time to just sit back and chill =/ at least my bf is bout to come scoop me up in his uber hott M3 =) ok that's enuff. byez0r =)

[gasolinekisses]

dear diary,
tonight i get to hang out with my 2 best friends. one of them is my ex. maybe he will re-fall madly in love with me. that would be nice. :] ahh, okay enough of that crap. we got my doggie groomed today. she looks like an alien. i finally saw a post by jordan inc. also, i took some more pics, but you can't see them yet.
xo
melizzle

[faithin_felix]

dear createblog diary,

today i posted a lot, like 73 posts so far, i have to post a lot because i am going on vacation. yeah. and i webcamed sandra =) loving createblog.

--faithin felix

[joanna0304]

Dear diary
So right now i feel a lil upset n mad, well omg i g2g now will rite 2morrow.

[jz1134]

dear diary im so bored i sat all day im not even joking all day on createblog so i think ive seen avery nook or however u spell it and cranny or however u spell it whoever up there taked about how he cant get a girlfriend u r not alone lol i read an interview for the perfect guy on my friend who is a girls xanga and she was like tall handsome nice well im missin two things from that the tall and the handsome

[gasolinekisses]

dear diary,
well, turns out that tonight i realized that i love my ex more than i could have imagined. seeing him just reaffirmed that... we hung out and made brownies and watched the surreal life and went to publix and watched finding nemo [again] and he played guitar and sang for us... hmm. makes me sad.
xo - melinda

[bobbster]

Dear createBlog diary,
Today was my birthday. Nothing.

[I_feel_beautiful]

Dear Diary,

Today I realized that I'm a jackass.

[hybrid]

Dear Everyone,


We are all lonesome people. No matter how we look at it. So, we should just all die. We are gonna die sooner or later. Whatever.


Dear Diary,

I'm afraid. I hear weird noises at night. Oh, it's just me crying myself to sleep. My bad. No one likes to talk to me anymore. I became a very boring person in a matter of 3 months. I shall now shut myself down. No one's gonna bother. I am an outcast. I am nothing. Cause you can look right through me, walk right past me.. and not even notice me. How sad... but that's how brutal life is.

Goodnight,
Kim Jr.

[DesperateXMeasur...]

Aww Kim.
You should move in with me. :D

Dear Diary,
Being at my mom's SUCKS. I came down to Tucson to visit her right? WITH MY OWN FREE WILL. I never HAD to come down here. All I've done while I've been here is sit in the living room, by myself. She hasn't even talked to me that much! What she does, is go in her room with her fiancee' and shuts the door. I don't even want to know what she does in there. She's spent more time with HIM, than she has ME. And she is always complaining about how she misses me. IF YOU REALLY MISSED ME YOU WOULD SPEND TIME WITH ME WHILE I AM IN YOUR HOUSE WOMAN!

Life sucks.

[uLoVeMikeRoch]

Dear Diary, im still brooding over porn, (wow i have no life, diary please slap me)
and then i right some cool stuff in CB too, but damn was today boring. I hate my life

[islandkiss]

dear diary,

nothing feels the same anymore.. I feel like nothing without him. I can't stop thinking about him. I wish I could tell him how I feel. why did it have to end like this?..

your obsessed cb member,

kelly