I don't get this trend Options

[dpl313]

So I've noticed this trend from a lot of different females I know. It usually ends up to where they get into a relationship with a guy, or end up close to being one. But the girl and the guy do all the couplish stuff. The guy refuses to give the relationship an official label. The girl in most cases says I'm content with doing the couplish stuff, but not being in an official relationship. Guy and girl decide it's ok to date other people too, but the feelings they have for each other is obvious.

Why are more people doing this these days?

[LoveToMySilas]

Its basically just the method of "messing". They like each other but the two may not be ready to commit or don't want the relationship at the moment so they mess and get all the benefits of being in a relationships while still being able to be single and free to explore other people. Did that make sense?

[DoubleJ]

It's honestly just people being people. Relationships come and go faster than certain people on this site. People just like to mess, because it can also be a trial period for if they wanna be together.

[tokyo-rose]

People don't want to feel tied down by committed, closed relationships.

[karmakiller]

It's called and open relationship. It's a lot better than them telling each other that they are exclusive and then going behind each others backs and seeing other people. It works for them because they're being honest with each other.

[aaayotiffany]

friends with benefits?! lmao.
my best guy friend is actually in this boat, except he's talking to like three girls at once. sighs, this boy. and he's messing around with all three of them. both guys and girls just want to have fun, they don't want to be tied down by the "relationship" status. "you only live once."

[aybaybay007]

because they're young

[TiffanyFactorial]

It's honestly just people being people. Relationships come and go faster than certain people on this site. People just like to mess, because it can also be a trial period for if they wanna be together.

hahaha i couldn't have said it better than myself. i was actually involved this sort of thing before and it ended pretty badly.

often one person is so blinded by their "happiness" or whatevs that they don't even care that they're not officially with them, just as long as they can still be with them without the label is all that matters to them. and the whole open relationship part is like..something i couldn't do because despite people's claims of being "not the jealous type", you know that if you like someone and you see them making out with someone else, you'd get pretty jealous unless you're the "can i join?" type of person. haha

it's the youth thing and it's the "i don't want to be committed" thing.

[sweetest-emotion]

ugh i can relate TOO much with this!

my current bf was iffy about becoming "official" because he was just worried that if we did things would get messy or he didn't want to hurt me by not being a "good" boyfriend. we were together, not seeing other people, just no title. but eventually he accepted that we were doing okay as a couple and we were official!
it just takes time. i didn't press it too much and he warmed up to it. he wasn't doing it to mess with other girls, he just needed to be okay with it fully before he committed. and now we're happily together!

[dustbunny]

it's "okay" to fuck up when the relationship isn't official

[foxx]

it's "okay" to fuck up when the relationship isn't official

qft. best kind :D

[defecate]

im in dis boat. i just want sum. watever i can get, dim sum.

[NoSex]

I would propose that it is, at least, in part a back-lash to the romance of our parents - the sort of love we've been informed of by Hollywood and cheap paperback novels. Monogamy isn't natural, so, really, this "trend" makes sense.

[Heathasm]

well i think that its a good idea. if their feellings get strong enough, im sure they will become something other than an open relationship.

i did the same thing with about 3 different guys and when i was ready to have a long-lasting relationship with only 1 person i just cut the other two off and i've been with my bf for 2 years now

[yaamakoh]

reminds me of made of honor.
i'm in the same boat too with one of my close friends, but i don't think we're ready to commit yet.
we did stuff together then stopped because it didn't feel right, but it's getting past the point where we sort of have the "brother sister" title.
i think once you get to that point, a hope for a relationship seems lost.
one of us has to break the ice, and i think we both want to too, but it doesn't seem like it's going to happen anytime soon.
like even though we're friends, i'd do anything for this girl.

[Glamourouz]

Simply because they're not ready to be in a committed relationship & it's the best way to allow yourself to figure out where you want to be and who you want to be with. Instead of forcing a relationship on one another they take it for what it's worth and let whatever happens happens if it's going to happen. Sometimes this isn't the best thing to do if you start to develop stronger feelings but it's the risk you take.

[datass]

open relationships.

kind of like saying "lets mess around with other people, but youre my prioritized fuckmate."

[mizzkewl06]

People don't want to feel tied down by committed, closed relationships.

agreed. and people now feel the need to explore and see whats out there, even when everything they want/need is right infront of them. they see other people do it and figure why can't they do the same.

[Megarina99]

open relationships.

kind of like saying "lets mess around with other people, but youre my prioritized fuckmate."

agreed. because some guys cant handle just having one, and i guess an open relationship is better than a guy cheating. but also this is basically the same thing as cheating just with the other person knowing that the other is screwing someone else.

[NoSex]

agreed. because some guys cant handle just having one, and i guess an open relationship is better than a guy cheating. but also this is basically the same thing as cheating just with the other person knowing that the other is screwing someone else.

1. Guys aren't the only benefactors in an open relationship.
2. Girls cheat too.
3. It can't be cheating if the parameters of the relationship are understood and consensual.

[Megarina99]

1. Guys aren't the only benefactors in an open relationship.
2. Girls cheat too.
3. It can't be cheating if the parameters of the relationship are understood and consensual.

That is very true, girls do cheat. But personally I think guys tend to cheat more, becuase sometimes they follow the way their penis points not their heart.

[LoveToMySilas]

^ I believe there was a study that said guys cheat more physically, girls cheat more emotionally.

[AimeeLynn]

Isn't this an open relationship?
anyways I was in one for about 2 months and yeah it's just seeing what out there and if you are truly meant for each other.

[NoSex]

But personally I think guys tend to cheat more, becuase sometimes they follow the way their penis points not their heart.

Just because you f**k someone else doesn't mean you don't love another.

[Megarina99]

Just because you f**k someone else doesn't mean you don't love another.

Thats not what im saying, im saying that sometimes guys cheat becuase their penis is pointing one way. Not saying that they dont love the other one but its how it goes sometimes.

[Kay-]

that's stupid.

[dpl313]

After reading most of these responses. Wow. I'm sort of bummed about the responses. Everyone's just condoning doing that sort of thing. People having bs reasons for fearing a relationship. It's really.. nvm. I'm not trying to sit up and criticise anyone. I'm just saying what I feel.

So if a girl started talking to a guy, and the girl wanted an open relationship. The guy wanted a serious relationship. Is the guy asking for too much in the 20-24 age group?