Emotional Cheating Options

[LoveToMySilas]

One person describes it as,

Often worse than physically cheating as love isn't about physical closeness but emotional closeness.

There was an article about it in Seventeen magazine that said:

-If you're more excited when your "crush" IMs/texts you than when your boyfriend/girlfriend does.
-You talk to them on a daily basis whether it be via online, phone or in real life.
-You tell them just about everything.
-Being "friendly" without physically having to touch them.

Have you guys ever emotionally cheated?

[Tung]

Honestly, almost alot of the time. I might not be physically cheating on them, say having sex or making out with them. But in my mind, I have a soft spot for another person while being in a relationship.

[sharpieattack]

I remember reading this article in seventeen!
I was really confused because I always confide in my guy friends..so does that mean I'm cheating on my boyfriend?

[vintage-toile]

everyone fancies other people in relationships at least one (be it celebrities or friends).
there's just a barrier between really liking them, and liking them over your current other halve.
i can't say i've ever done that..but i know people who have.
its a bit confusing really if you've not done it. or if you cant see that you've done it because youre oblivious

[LoveToMySilas]

I remember reading this article in seventeen!
I was really confused because I always confide in my guy friends..so does that mean I'm cheating on my boyfriend?

Only you find yourself getting more exciting when talking to them than with your boyfriend.

I actually read the article while waiting to get my fillings. Eh, who hasn't done this...except for Holly.

[illriginal]

No... and if you're emotionally cheating, then it's time to break up. Obviously you found someone better, all you have to hope for is that they're legitimate about who they are.

[vintage-toile]

Only you find yourself getting more exciting when talking to them than with your boyfriend.

I actually read the article while waiting to get my fillings. Eh, who hasn't done this...except for Holly.

i really am pleased people are finally using my name
and i was saying i probably do do it, but unintentionally, which is what a lot of people seem to do.
so is that really classed as cheating?

ugh. relationships and cheating are so confusing.
it all spirals, anything could be taken as anything.

[LoveToMySilas]

Emotional cheating because even though its nothing physical you have them on the farthest corner of your heart.

[vintage-toile]

this really is confusing me. so i will explain:
with my ex-boyfriend, i thought i did like someone else, but they were no match to him. then i knew i did not like them like that.
then i met my current boyfriend..and i knew it was something more than previous, and i really did like him.
so the other relationship ended, and it was an almost mutual thing as well, he hadn't really been a very great boyfriend either in all honesty
with my current boyfriend, there is no one else i really like at all, no one i could even think i have "emotionally" cheated on him with, because he really is the only guy i see as incredible and want to be with.

so is the first part, with the ex boyfriend, emotional cheating?
and if so...is it the first, second, or both parts to it?

sorry this is kind of long but im pretty confused!

[illriginal]

It's simple sweety.... if a person who isn't your significant other makes you emotionally more "positive" than your significant other, it simply means that person is better in terms of making you happy in every which way that your significant other doesn't.

But then again it really isn't cheating because it's not like you're forcing your feelings, your feelings are natural to any action. But if you attempt to build more than a friendship in terms of emotions then you're emotionally cheating.

[vintage-toile]

sweety? was that meant in a patronising "shes so dumb" way?
thankyou for clearing it up though, the first probably wasn't emotionally cheating but the second was...however i didnt want to build on the friendship until i had come out of the previous relationship, which is what happened.
*sighs* i feel better now.
these topics are just as useful as the resources area i guess.

[Tung]

^ offtopic here, but I wished you typed in normal font, instead of editing your font everytime you post =\

[illriginal]

sweety? was that meant in a patronising "shes so dumb" way?
thankyou for clearing it up though, the first probably wasn't emotionally cheating but the second was...however i didnt want to build on the friendship until i had come out of the previous relationship, which is what happened.
*sighs* i feel better now.
these topics are just as useful as the resources area i guess.

oh jees now men can't call females "sweety".

[vintage-toile]

^ offtopic here, but I wished you typed in normal font, instead of editing your font everytime you post =\

oh...how comes?
i like the font times new roman, i use it everywhere.

and no there's nothing wrong with males calling females sweetie, im just very not used to it.

[Flaunted]

Only thing that can remotely relate is my closest guy friend, I guess. But we end up talking about our signifigant other to eachother. MBFF? lol. So this isn't emocheating :[

[mizzkewl06]

yes, but not intentionally (and not with my current bf). i think emotional cheating is just as hurtful and damaging as physical cheating. im very careful around my guy friends, especially ones either i've had feelings for or have had feelings for me. i wouldn't want my bf to do it to me, so i don't do it to him. plus i think when you emotionally cheat you lead people on and that's just wrong.

[shoryuken]

One person describes it as, There was an article about it in Seventeen magazine that said:

-If you're more excited when your "crush" IMs/texts you than when your boyfriend/girlfriend does.
-You talk to them on a daily basis whether it be via online, phone or in real life.
-You tell them just about everything.
-Being "friendly" without physically having to touch them.

Have you guys ever emotionally cheated?

uh yee.. datt calll bestt frriendd.. NUB..

[Stefanny]

duh.

[Glamourouz]

I've emotionally cheated & I guess I do it pretty often; I didn't even know there was a such thing as emotional cheating until we talked about it in my psychology class last year

[NoSex]

The western ideal of romance is so unrealistic and oppressive. That a single person could entirely fulfill another's intellectual, sexual, and emotional satisfaction is absurd. By suggesting that even the mere emotional outlets one has from a relationship constitutes cheating is inflammatory bullshit.

If people weren't so stupid, insecure, and superstitious, maybe this bullshit could end. But, instead, they write this sort of shit in teen magazines and suddenly... if he isn't talking to you, he's cheating and hates your guts. Psychic death, anyone?

[Tramatize]

I wouldn't say i have Emotionally Cheated, but I do get attracted to other girls.
But at the time i usually like my girlfriend more, but if i ever have thoughts about another girl, its mainly because there pretty, and i don't have fantasies, i just imagine what it would be like to be with that girl.
I don't find it cheating.
I see it like this; you will always like more than one person, but sometimes you have stronger feelings, maybe for your girlfriend [even if your in love], maybe not.

[transcendentalis...]

No... and if you're emotionally cheating, then it's time to break up. Obviously you found someone better, all you have to hope for is that they're legitimate about who they are.

Just because someone is more captivating does not mean that they are "better." My best guy friend has always been one of the most captivating people I know, and even more so than my ex, but he's practically my brother. I can say wholeheartedly I love him more than any love interest or boyfriend that I've ever had, but it's purely platonic.

Then speaking of brothers, I would definitely pick talking to my brother than a love interest. If I'm on the phone with the cute kid from wherever and my brother calls, the kid's getting put on hold.

[NoSex]

Then speaking of brothers, I would definitely pick talking to my brother than a love interest. If I'm on the phone with the cute kid from wherever and my brother calls, the kid's getting put on hold.

So, when you "emotionally cheat" on your boyfriend with your brother, does that also count as incest? I mean, I'm no expert...

[datass]

nope
it's horrible for the person that's emotionally cheated on.

[transcendentalis...]

So, when you "emotionally cheat" on your boyfriend with your brother, does that also count as incest? I mean, I'm no expert...

According to Seventeen magazine, yes.
you can decide how legit it is

...skldfjlak ew.

[AimeeLynn]

I wouldn't say i have Emotionally Cheated, but I do get attracted to other girls.
But at the time i usually like my girlfriend more, but if i ever have thoughts about another girl, its mainly because there pretty, and i don't have fantasies, i just imagine what it would be like to be with that girl.
I don't find it cheating.

YES! exactly what I say. I get attracted to other guys but not to a point that I am having sex with them.

[NoSex]

According to Seventeen magazine, yes.

Well, I mean... Seventeen magazine is a clear authority.

[illriginal]

The western ideal of romance is so unrealistic and oppressive. That a single person could entirely fulfill another's intellectual, sexual, and emotional satisfaction is absurd. By suggesting that even the mere emotional outlets one has from a relationship constitutes cheating is inflammatory bullshit.

If people weren't so stupid, insecure, and superstitious, maybe this bullshit could end. But, instead, they write this sort of shit in teen magazines and suddenly... if he isn't talking to you, he's cheating and hates your guts. Psychic death, anyone?

I fully agree.

[misoshiru]

The western ideal of romance is so unrealistic and oppressive. That a single person could entirely fulfill another's intellectual, sexual, and emotional satisfaction is absurd. By suggesting that even the mere emotional outlets one has from a relationship constitutes cheating is inflammatory bullshit.

If people weren't so stupid, insecure, and superstitious, maybe this bullshit could end. But, instead, they write this sort of shit in teen magazines and suddenly... if he isn't talking to you, he's cheating and hates your guts. Psychic death, anyone?

so you and tama are into polygamy yes?

[illriginal]

so you and tama are into polygamy yes?

No. At least not I, that just doesn't make sense. Where did you get this idea from, if you don't mind me asking?

[pandora]

Well I would consider emotional cheating like... telling someone who isnt your bf that you love them romantically. You might not be physically/sexually cheating on them but yes that is a form of cheating to me, and sometimes it can really drive a wedge in your relationship. On the other hand, I don't consider just talking to someone more than you talk to your bf emotional cheating. It's okay to have friends that you might confide in more than you feel you can with your bf. I guess the question really is "where do you cross the line?"

[NoSex]

so you and tama are into polygamy yes?

I'm into polyamory, not polygamy.
Free, consensual, acknowledged, understood, and conductive love.

[queen]

^ how's that been working out for you?

i've never known someone who was willing to be in multiple serious relationships at a time.

[illriginal]

I'm into polyamory, not polygamy.
Free, consensual, acknowledged, understood, and conductive love.

[Tweeti]

most of that is just flirting, but if it's to the point where you are getting excited about another man's text then you need to re-evaluate your relationship

[NoSex]

^ how's that been working out for you?

I've never actually been in multiple sexual or romantic relationships (at one given time), and don't exactly care to (I have a hard enough time having any sort of feeling for a single person, let alone more than one).

i've never known someone who was willing to be in multiple serious relationships at a time.

I have. A good number of people. They're doing fine.

[superstitious]

I guess I would have to say no, I haven't "emotionally cheated." I know my limits, emotionally. I don't commit and as such, I don't feel like an emotional cheater. I have a hard time with the idea of settling down with one person. I'm sure that there's several reasons for that, but I don't find having one mate a necessity.

I get a lot of crap for my state of mind, especially because I am a mom and often, because I'm a woman and people have it embedded in their mind that women should long for exclusive commitment, sexually and emotionally.

[queen]

I have. A good number of people. They're doing fine.

wow, kudos to them. i wouldn't be able to do that, but then again my perspective of an intimate relationship may be different; the only way i'd be able to engage in multiple relationships were if they were very casual, not intimate.

so my next question: do these people that you know who practice polyamory ever break up? haha

[ersatz]

I think I'm emotionally cheating right now, but it's not so much that I like this new person, they just perk my interests...they're very cool and they sort of think like me, which makes me really, really excited because not a lot of people think like me or understand me...most of my friendships (mostly at school) are me performing sociology experiments and just wanting to understand everyone I know. I don't like a lot of people, really. So I'm not sure if I'm just excited that I met a boy with a similar mind or if I actually like him. I'll have to talk to him more and see.

[fagget]

I am a strict follower of the rules of Seventeen magazine. I mean, I AM a 15-year-old.

Those are some bullshit "guidelines" of "emotional cheating".

[illriginal]

You guys shouldn't depend on a magazine for guidelines. I think I'm gonna commit a terrorist act on all media outlets in America.



JK

[Tweeti]

You guys shouldn't depend on a magazine for guidelines. I think I'm gonna commit a terrorist act on all media outlets in America.



JK

... not funny after everything that's happened.

[illriginal]

... not funny after everything that's happened.

Blame Bush and the Neo-Templar Knights wwwwwww

[NoSex]

so my next question: do these people that you know who practice polyamory ever break up? haha

Can't really "break up" in a polyamorous relationship; you aren't actually "going out," in the first place (or at least, most of the time).

... not funny after everything that's happened.

I thought it was funny.

[Joss-eh-lime]

nahh its not "cheating" b/c they are just your friend.
if you start to like this other person more than your current bf/gf than its time to break up, simple as that.

i have experienced this though...i felt kind of bad, but i got over it.