Something on the serious side. Options

[xtwitchyx]

Earlier this year I had lost my dad to a heartattack and pretty much watched him die right at home before the ambulance got here. I just wanted to know if anyone here ever lost someone and how did you handle it?

The holidays are coming up and I kind of dread them. Other days I think things will be fine for the holidays. I don't really get sad about it as much anymore. It's just... My Birthday is coming up and this will be the first Birthday of mine without him here. Then there's the first Thanksgiving and the first Christmas without my dad being here. It seems like the thought of it all will be really really weird. Then other times it seems more like things will still in a way be normal. I don't know, I'll just be really glad when this year is over with. But then next year I'll have to meet the day he passed right away. (It happened in January.) I feel weird about that. Like I'm not sure what I'll do on that day. I don't want to mope because I've found that I don't have anything left to mope about. It all just seems like it's going to feel weird with a mix of that it will all just feel normal in some small way. Sorry if none of this really makes much sense, but it's just what has been going through my mind lately and sometimes I feel better if I can talk to complete strangers about it.

[*jeanna*]

i couldn't imagine losing my dad since i spend basically all my time with him.
i lost my grandma i use to see every holiday back in 2001 but it still feels like it happened yesterday, it's weird.

she died from cancer of the esophagus caused by second hand smoke.
i really hate thanksgiving and christmas the most now.

and it is a lot better and helps if you can talk about them to anyone.

[EddieV]

I lost my mom and my grandfather. Sad thing about these two is that I was the last person in the family to find out about the lost on both of them, and I was the closest to them both.

[arcanum]

I lost my granddaddy when I was 6, idk.. I guess I handled it well. I was little, and didn't understand it much. I cried a little at the funeral, after it was explained to me what had happened.
I also lost my uncle a few years ago, but I handled that really well, imo. He was in a lot of pain, so yeah.

[karmakiller]

Wow, I'm sorry that you had to go through that. I couldn't imagine being there when someone that I love passed away. The hard thing about that is that you have to deal with all of the emotions right in that second, it's different than hearing from someone what happened.

I lost my grandfather when I was 10, I cried myself to sleep for almost a year after that. I felt really guilty, because he wanted to die at home (where my grandmother died 20 years earlier) and I felt like I could've helped him with that. Also, the fact that when he left I was at school and never got to say goodbye.

It will deffinately be hard, but it will make you a stronger person to get past all the emotion that comes with it. I've lost lots of friends and family and I've learned that the best thing to do is remember but not dwell. They wouldn't want you to suffer over their death...

[xtwitchyx]

Wow, I'm sorry to all of you.

I had several panic attacks after my dad was gone. A doctor told me that I should keep a journal or something and write everything down to get it out of my system, but I tried that and it didn't really make me feel any better. I prefer to hear how others handle things like this. It seems much more helpful. So thank you to all who have replied to this and thank you to those who will reply to this. It's really helpful.