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Thoughts
xtremeliquid
post Jun 18 2007, 03:58 AM
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I posted this on my forum to see what people would say about it. I've decided to post it here also.

Thoughts
The deviant deceit of human emotions
Crumbles straight towards the ground unhinged
With a sense pertaining to the perception of the aesthetic soul
And towards to endless despair that seemed to evoke eccentric actions

To fathom from the perturbed mind and feelings
Into the intangible thoughts of regrets and melancholy
Experiencing lament on the first few days of eternity
And to have the tendency to hinder the morals of us all

As the door crashes shut with the inevitable gate closing
With the human body trying to desperately escape through the gasping breath of fire
To be able to leave with a sense of purity
And to be able to hinder the mind from dementedness.
 
 
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cherry90
post Jun 25 2007, 09:11 AM
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now i will admit i only read it 3 times 2 get it!!!!


its a thought provokin poem with a depressing side but actually has sum real deap truths and its an awesomely writtern poem.

wat was ur forum that u rote others on??
 
WillTeddy
post Jun 25 2007, 09:46 AM
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Wow

throughout the whole poem i felt myself creep from one plane of emotions into another

The word hinder is really strong in the poem

Although extremely truthful, life has a brighter side :)

hope to see a more happy poem from you :)
 
xtremeliquid
post Jun 28 2007, 01:10 AM
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I'm glad that people took time to read this. Yes, pessimism isn't life in general because there are decent days. Anyway, thank you very much for the comments.
 
cherry90
post Jun 28 2007, 07:44 AM
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no problemo!!! when the writing this gd y not!!!!

please comment my few poems i have on here!! i wanna see wat ppl think
 

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