Helplessly Fallen.` Options

[x_Pr0ViDenTiaL]

Heres the deal..

Your in a relationship, lets say a little over a year. You've screwed up time and time again. You and your lover are now seperated for a couple of months. However, you still seem to be head over heels and are hurt by watching her move on and continue life as you two never existed.

Your ready to change, but shes not ready to see the change in you. Shes scared of the past repeating itself. She tells you she doesn't want to make assumptions based on the past; yet she does so anyway.

Shes not ready to persue what you two have and you understand this. Your convinced what she wants to do is move on, but you aren't ready for that. You cry yourself to sleep at the thought of losing her for good.

^^ Sigh.`
I'm not one that likes to ask other people for advice. But I'm curious as to what you guys think.

[cori-catastrophe]

I say that you prove yourself. If you've screwed up, she's been hurt & is probably not ready to forgive you. You need to prove yourself so that she can believe you. Valentine's Day is coming up so that's a nice oppurtunity for you. Did that make any sence?

[x_Pr0ViDenTiaL]

The opportunity comes clear, and I'm ready for the chase. But the chances of her being available for Valentine's Day is ridiculous. Theres a handful of guys that have been trying to get at her since our separation.

Being with her is something I want more than anything right now.

Does anyone really ever get over their first love.?

[cori-catastrophe]

The opportunity comes clear, and I'm ready for the chase. But the chances of her being available for Valentine's Day is ridiculous. Theres a handful of guys that have been trying to get at her since our separation.

Being with her is something I want more than anything right now.

Does anyone really ever get over their first love.?

If there have been guys chasing after her, she probably just needs some space right now. I know how overwhelming it can be. Just give her some time to think about everything that's happened between you two & she'll come to her sences.
You should tell her all this. Of course, she probably wont believe you right off because she has been hurt. Do you want to be with her so bad because you're desperate or is it because you truely love her? You need to think about this deeply & after thinking, if yo ustill come up with the same conclusion just keep trying to prove yourself. After she gets over her anger maybe she will she that you screwed up & you're sorry for it.

[x_Pr0ViDenTiaL]

Trust me I've been trying. I feel as though I really do love her. Perhaps she doesn't feel the same though; Whether shes in denial, or just really hurt. I don't think its a desperate act. I find myself reminiscing every night; I wake up in the middle of the night and crawl into my box of our memories. It upsets me. We were once so happy together and all went wrong. I want to believe that I'm mature enough to handle a relationship with her.

I also realize I'm the one at fault here, and maybe I should stop pissing and moaning about it. But its much more than that. There is so much more to us than anyone knows. I'm not ready to let go and I trust that its been hard on her. Considering she might be confused as to why I've changed so much, and what to do with these other guys going for her.

I'm not the person she once went out with. That scares me too because that means I'm not the person she once loved. I feel that I've changed for the better. We were together from late 05 to late 06.` Ups and downs of course; and now I'm here helplessly thinking of her in early 07.` Since then I feel I've learned and grown to respect everyone more. I've gotten myself out of the pressure my peers once presented.

This heartache gets the best of me.`