age difference |
 Sep 4 2006, 09:39 PM
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#1
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Member  Group: Member Posts: 15 Joined: Jan 2006 Member No: 364,273  |
so over the summer, i went to this camp.
and i left liking this guy. i'm 17, and the guy i like is 6 years older than me (23). He was a counselor at the camp, and he and I talked and stuff. I dont know if i should tell him that I like him. Cause I cant stop thinking about him. I dont know if it would be a good idea, cause i am planning on going back to the camp next year, and he will be a counselor there again. So should I tell him now? Or wait a year, tell him, and when camp ends never see him again. or should i just not tell him??? Would it be frowned upon? 23 and 17 year olds together? |
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Sep 4 2006, 10:00 PM
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#2
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te quiero Group: Banned Posts: 2,586 Joined: Apr 2004 Member No: 14,678 |
Uh... it's not so much the age difference, but more of the fact that you just met him at some camp and will probably never see him again...
I have a friend who's 17 and she's dating a 21 year old guy, and they respect each other and stuff, so I don't see a problem. You kinda have to be careful with older guys, though. They tend to... expect more. |
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Sep 5 2006, 12:30 AM
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#3
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 <3 Group: Member Posts: 3,657 Joined: Nov 2004 Member No: 64,493 |
6 years isn't that big of an age gap.
i think you should tell him how you feel, but bare in mind that you guys might never get together since you guys don't see each other much just becareful if you decide to tell him that you like him |
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Sep 5 2006, 01:15 AM
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#4
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 Senior Member Group: Posts: 8,274 Joined: Mar 2004 Member No: 8,001 |
be careful.
he can lose his job. people would fire him and acused him of child molestation. |
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Sep 5 2006, 05:11 AM
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#5
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 (′ ･ω･｀) Group: Official Designer Posts: 6,179 Joined: Dec 2004 Member No: 72,477 |
^O_o?
Well it wouldn't matter if they're in love...right? ...I think. |
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Sep 5 2006, 05:51 AM
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#6
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 whaaaaaaat? Group: Member Posts: 2,293 Joined: May 2004 Member No: 16,660 |
in response to icy_wonderland, whether or not they are in love or not, she's still 17. if they have sex, it's considered statutory rape, since she is still considered a minor.
so yeah, if anything like that does happen, be careful. as just bf and gf, it's whatever. not that big of an age difference. go for it. |
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Sep 5 2006, 06:36 AM
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#7
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(′ ･ω･｀) Group: Official Designer Posts: 6,179 Joined: Dec 2004 Member No: 72,477 |
Oh right. So if they don't have sex it's alright. Then go for it
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Sep 5 2006, 08:47 AM
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#8
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 daughter of sin Group: Member Posts: 1,653 Joined: Mar 2006 Member No: 386,134 |
Age difference isn't the problem, as some people already said. I'm 17 and I'm dating a 24-year-old, and it's the best relationship I've ever been in.
But anyway. Just take my advice, because I know what I'm talking about - forget about him. Well you will, like it or not, because you won't see him for an entire year. It's not worth it, especially if he doesn't have any feelings for you. If you really think that he does, and if he lives somewhere near you, then you could try. But chances are you'll end up with a broken heart. Edit: It's long distance? Wowww please don't do that. I just got out of a two year long distance relationship and I'm just warning you, it hurts like hell when you can't be with him. It's a very very very very VERY bad idea. Don't do it.. you'll regret it a lot. Just let go while it's not as serious as it can get. |
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Sep 5 2006, 09:01 AM
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#9
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 I've got ADD and magic markers. Oh the thrills I will have. Group: Member Posts: 624 Joined: Jul 2006 Member No: 445,743 |
QUOTE(dahding @ Sep 5 2006, 6:51 AM)  in response to icy_wonderland, whether or not they are in love or not, she's still 17. if they have sex, it's considered statutory rape, since she is still considered a minor. No it's not. At least, not in New York State. It's only considered rape if she's under the age of 16. Anyway, you sound a lot like my cousin. She met a 20 year-old guy at camp when she was 15, but she started arranging meetings with him and seeing him behind her mother's back. You, however, are almost an adult and you should be able to make your own decisions, so it's really up to you. Personally, I think it's a bad idea. Long-distance relationships rarely work out. |
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Sep 5 2006, 11:09 AM
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#10
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 Senior Member Group: Official Member Posts: 6,349 Joined: Aug 2006 Member No: 455,274 |
QUOTE(Spiritual Winged Aura @ Sep 5 2006, 2:15 AM) be careful. he can lose his job. people would fire him and acused him of child molestation. Agreed... I wonder if her parents are ever gonna find out. All these parents have lost their bond with their children, if they didn't we wouldn't be having little kids acting like adults. And this guy is risking "alot", people most likely think they're father and daughter just from the huge age/maturity/physical development difference. |
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Sep 5 2006, 12:12 PM
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#11
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daughter of sin Group: Member Posts: 1,653 Joined: Mar 2006 Member No: 386,134 |
QUOTE(Tamacracker @ Sep 5 2006, 12:09 PM) Agreed... I wonder if her parents are ever gonna find out. All these parents have lost their bond with their children, if they didn't we wouldn't be having little kids acting like adults. And this guy is risking "alot", people most likely think they're father and daughter just from the huge age/maturity/physical development difference. Actually, sometimes the maturity level is pretty close despite the age gap. And the "physical development difference" isn't really that much at times.. it all depends on the people. You can't group all relationships like that. Me and my boyfriend also have a huge age difference, but my parents have met him and they like him :) Don't assume things.. |
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| *Uronacid* |
Sep 5 2006, 12:32 PM
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#12
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Guest |
QUOTE(Angelina Taylor @ Sep 5 2006, 1:12 PM) Actually, sometimes the maturity level is pretty close despite the age gap. And the "physical development difference" isn't really that much at times.. it all depends on the people. You can't group all relationships like that. Me and my boyfriend also have a huge age difference, but my parents have met him and they like him :) Don't assume things.. SWEEBISH, I agree... It's not always right, but sometimes it doesn't matter... just like any relationship no matter what the age difference is. Although, I don't think you should worry about it if he won't see you for a striaght year... another thing, if he's 24 years old, and you make it sound like he doesn't have a car to come see you or visit you. I don't know, but that's not a very good sign... >.> If I was a girl, I wouldn't want to be in a relationship with someone who wouldn't be able to take care of me if things did work out... if he doesn't drive or have a car by the time he's 24 chances are that he's either got a good reason, or he's just a hobo... >.> Ages Sex and Rape in the US: If you are 16 years of age or younger: You or your parents have the ability to decide whether you are raped or not. The guy (If 18 or older) pretty much has no say in what happens if charges are pressed and it is found that he is guilty of have any unwanted sexual intercourse with you. If you are 17 years of age: You have the ability to decide whether you are being raped or not. Your parents don't have a say anymore, and you are considered to have the ability to know (by law). The guy (If 18 or older) still has no real say if charges are pressed and it is found that he is guilty of have any unwanted sexual intercourse with you. If you are 18 years of age: You have the ability to decide, but the guy has the ability to really fight you in court if you are making "false accusations". He is now innocent until proven guilty even if he has had sexual contact with you. |
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Sep 5 2006, 01:42 PM
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#13
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 Senior Member Group: Member Posts: 535 Joined: Nov 2005 Member No: 301,185 |
My parents are 6 years apart, and have been married since 1991.
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Sep 5 2006, 04:07 PM
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#14
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daughter of sin Group: Member Posts: 1,653 Joined: Mar 2006 Member No: 386,134 |
QUOTE(Uronacid @ Sep 5 2006, 1:32 PM) SWEEBISH, I agree... It's not always right, but sometimes it doesn't matter... just like any relationship no matter what the age difference is. Although, I don't think you should worry about it if he won't see you for a striaght year... another thing, if he's 24 years old, and you make it sound like he doesn't have a car to come see you or visit you. I don't know, but that's not a very good sign... >.> If I was a girl, I wouldn't want to be in a relationship with someone who wouldn't be able to take care of me if things did work out... if he doesn't drive or have a car by the time he's 24 chances are that he's either got a good reason, or he's just a hobo... >.> Is that directed to me? o.O Because it doesn't make any sense if it is. |
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Sep 5 2006, 08:43 PM
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#15
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 What side was that Prvt Pile? Group: Member Posts: 131 Joined: Aug 2006 Member No: 451,960 |
My wife and I are 11 years apart been married for 6 years now have 2 kids so there is not big deal really as you grow older...if you take it back say ok you are 7 and he is 14 that is weird and stuff.
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Sep 6 2006, 06:51 AM
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#16
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 Senior Member Group: Member Posts: 1,476 Joined: May 2005 Member No: 135,305 |
few years isnt a big deal.if you really love him,he really loves you,then go ahead.but yeah....love doent mean you need to have sex with him.
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Sep 6 2006, 01:16 PM
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#17
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Senior Member Group: Member Posts: 535 Joined: Nov 2005 Member No: 301,185 |
So...topic starter, what are you going to do?
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Sep 6 2006, 05:17 PM
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#18
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 -->AZN L0SER<-- Group: Member Posts: 22 Joined: Jul 2006 Member No: 444,985 |
Age is nothing but a number, right? My parents are six years apart and they're very happy together. Tell him how u feel. If he feels the same about you, go for it. Do you think your parents will approve?? If not, don't care what they say. At least you're in 'love'. =D No one can make you stop. But I guess he's going to get fired. L.L; GOOD LUCK! =)
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Sep 6 2006, 07:39 PM
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#19
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Member Group: Member Posts: 15 Joined: Jan 2006 Member No: 364,273 |
yeah...
i dont think he knows i like him. and i dont even know for sure if he likes me. its just... im just so drawn into him. its not like im going to tell my parents about him, im not even looking for a long relationship, maybe a fling. a fling is alright, right? im a conservative girl, so i wouldnt want to have sex or any of that stuff with him. i just want to, you know...be with him. but yeah.. big problem is that i dont even know if he is a least bit interested in me. sometimes i think he might be, but then i dont know if i am just overthinking things. he's really mature for his age, so i dont know if he'd freak out and just stop talking to me, once i tell him how i feel. so should i tell him? or just keep liking him, and never tell him how much i like him? |
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