Fear |
Fear |
*Kathleen* |
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#1
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Fear
Hold me close and near Keep me away from the pain I fear Protect me now because I'm not as strong as I once was I fell through it all Watched me sink deeper and fall Capsized in my dreams Alone on my own as it seems From one second to the next I had it all and then nothing like the rest As I see death ahead I remember there you were - nothing said |
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#2
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![]() Senior Member ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Member Posts: 1,795 Joined: May 2004 Member No: 16,421 ![]() |
:claps: another good one.. they should have a rating system on these.. so we can rate the poems, lol well.. if they did, i'd say 9.3/10
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*Kathleen* |
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#3
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Hehe you're too nice. This is back when I didn't have that big of a vocabulary.
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#4
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![]() Senior Member ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Member Posts: 1,795 Joined: May 2004 Member No: 16,421 ![]() |
haha I see.. who says you need lots of diff words to write a good poem? I have a large vocabulary now, but I cant string them together into poetry very well
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*Kathleen* |
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#5
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Hehe...well I just see mine as...plain, I suppose? I feel like the words that I use to rhyme are so basic, you know? Hehe. I bet if you tried, you'd produce a terrific one.
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#6
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![]() Senior Member ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Member Posts: 1,795 Joined: May 2004 Member No: 16,421 ![]() |
QUOTE Hehe...well I just see mine as...plain, I suppose? I feel like the words that I use to rhyme are so basic, you know? Hehe. I bet if you tried, you'd produce a terrific one. Basic rhymes dont demerit the poem Meh... just because you said that, I'm going to write a poem in the next day, and prove you wrong ![]() |
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#7
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![]() Liv's Secret Lover *shhhh* ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Member Posts: 201 Joined: Apr 2004 Member No: 14,229 ![]() |
I like your writing style Kathleen, it's beautifully strung together. Nothing wrong with basic rhymes. Besides, I don't know many people who could rhyme a word like "Soliloquy" or something like that. Big words are often unnecessary.
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#8
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![]() Senior Member ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Member Posts: 1,989 Joined: Apr 2004 Member No: 10,691 ![]() |
Its pretty good.
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*NatiMarie* |
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#9
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It's really good Kathleen. =) Wow, you're a great writer. Yay!
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