has this happened to you?, didn't know where to put this topic.. Options

[wishonthestars]

At your school, your not seen as pretty or hott. But when your out in public with guys that you don't know - they honk their horns, say unappropriate things (sex related), stare, smile, etc?

I don't get it at all! What's the difference?
---
But sometimes when I get hit on, I feel dirty and like I want to go back to being seen as unpretty...yet I have no clue why. =[

[omgah_itsmaggiex]

pshh, yea. im not considered preppy/ hot or a geek/ugly at my school but ive never dated anyone and no one has asked me to the school dance but when im outside, people touch me or honk their horns. its kinda annoying actually.

[HeLlOrIcAnGuRl]

yes i do. Im seen as a ugly person to guys in school, but then all the ugly doodes stare at me while im with my mom and for some reason it makes me feel uglier

[ComradeRed]

Your standards start decreasing once you leave the idyllic little world of high school, believe me.

[LiLCUTiEFR0MDAYA...]

all tha tyme. the only reason people dont do it at skool is cuz my bf is always with me and we been goin out for a year already. but when me & him are walking home sooo many beanerz [dun trip i AM mexican] check me out and all that crap or when im with mah sister..

but i dont think im ugly?

[ComradeRed]

Being ugly and being beautiful isn't black or white--it's a sliding scale. As you get older, your standards decrease because reality crowds out your optimistic naivete. As your standards decrease, more women who would otherwise be below the benchmark are above the benchmark. As more women meet you requirements, you stare at and hit on more women. Not suprisingly, more women are then stared at by you.

People outside high school generlaly have lower standards--so they're probably more likely to think you're pretty if you're on the fence.

[aznxdreamer]

yeah. because at school, people have known you for a couple of years now, and people that you know really well dont think you're hot or ugly, just another person. and it also kinda depends on your reputation at school.

[_sarcastic_]

ugly men would stare at me and wink and all that nasty stuff, even when i'm with my bf.

[steezahh]

yeah i get that. mainly cause my schools punk-rockers so they go for they`re own 'type' haha but when im out on the street its like buddiee... haha.. oh well. i`m used to it by now. but it does get on my nerves. its like find something better to do.

[m.ar.i.a]

nope. good thing i liv in a country (sorta?)

[Stephire]

I think it's all about reputation.
There are girls at my school that are ugly as hell, but they're very outgoing therefore a lot of guys at my school like them;; But If you see them at the mall no one even gives them a glance.
I'm really not outgoing at all and I hang out with the computer/gamer geeks so I really don't get much notice at school;; But when I'm in public I get much more attention.


But thats ok, because I'd rather go out with a guy who can pwn me in World Of Warcraft;; than some blonde jock that I'm just going to call a fag repeatedly.

Xp

[xosteffanator]

Hmm...well adults say that I'm pretty (I don't mean to be arrogant) but at my school, it's not pretty people like it's "hot" and you have to be "hot by wearing brand nem clothes and having blonde hair, which I have but I don't have brand name clothes.

[TootsInTraining2]

I am the SAME way!
It stinks because in a small way...
don't u wanna be seen as a hottie in school?
But when guys start touching my backside
it gets out of hand

[jEllyBeaNs]

yeah i get that. mainly cause my schools punk-rockers so they go for they`re own 'type' haha but when im out on the street its like buddiee... haha.. oh well. i`m used to it by now. but it does get on my nerves. its like find something better to do.

^haha thats wut im sayin. my schools mainly preppy kids and emo kids soo they also just go for there types, but down here where i live, when u go to tha malls there's guys (old guys) thats have massive staring problems. its gross, i remember once i was at tha mall wit my friend and these guys were walking towards us, and they were like "aye shawty, aye shawty" then he started to follow us, i was like ooh hell no. it was kinda creepy.

[steezahh]

^haha thats wut im sayin.  my schools mainly preppy kids and emo kids soo they also just go for there types, but down here where i live, when u go to tha malls there's guys (old guys) thats have massive staring problems. its gross, i remember once i was at tha mall wit my friend and these guys were walking towards us, and they were like "aye shawty, aye shawty" then he started to follow us, i was like ooh hell no.  it was kinda creepy. 

ahaha.. thats what happens too. shoot. once i was walking with my 'big sistar' and then this guy [kinda old] was like singing HEY YOUNGG GIRL.. haha... it was creepy. but he could sing!! haha.

[jennyjenny]

Because you're judged and cliqued at school and a lot of them guys probably think you're pretty, but they're afraid what their friends might say about them.

And the guys who honk at you don't know about your personality and they just judge you on looks.

[jEllyBeaNs]

ahaha.. thats what happens too. shoot. once i was walking with my 'big sistar' and then this guy [kinda old] was like singing HEY YOUNGG GIRL.. haha... it was creepy. but he could sing!! haha.

haha well at least he sould sinG lol

[Babi3xFoOlish]

its mainly them "mexican ppl", you noe what im talkin bout?
they seem to think any girl is HOT i guess, cus they obviously honks at any chick that they see.

[spoon_fork]

maybe the reason is "you dont look good in school uniforms..." haha

[WHOngos144]

Yeah, that's happened to me. When I'm in school the guys in my class like the blonde bitchy type and that's not me. But when I'm out in public guys staring at me.

[so0o_contagious]

some guys just hits on anythin that walks, has a junk in the trunk, or has some pretty nice melons.

ohh boys boys boys.

yay for a non poll topic

[mzbbc]

haha well at least he sould sinG lol

haha i agree. it could have been worse.

[Mikael]

Your standards start decreasing once you leave the idyllic little world of high school, believe me.

I believe! Amen. Ive seen the low...

[sunissed14127]

Yeah....I mean some guys like me at school & stuff, but most of the attention comes from total strangers.

[AimeeLynn]

At your school, your not seen as pretty or hott. But when your out in public with guys that you don't know - they honk their horns, say unappropriate things (sex related), stare, smile, etc?

I don't get it at all! What's the difference?
---
But sometimes when I get hit on, I feel dirty and like I want to go back to being seen as unpretty...yet I have no clue why. =[

well at least u do get noticed...

[cLinT_wEStw0oD]

if a guy whistled at my girl when i was with her i would turn around and deck him. same thing with my mother. once i was at a bank and this KID yelled "mamae!". when i got outside i almost got arrested. stupid cops.

[innocentwinky]

YAY . I can answer this one.
My driving instructor told me the answer to your problem. Since you mention older males also "mexican" males in general. Hehe. It's a cultrual thing. They don't necessary think you are HOT they just do it to bug you. They know that you get annoyed and they see it in your eyes and they get the joy of seeing you upset at a compliment. Take it in stride , someone looked at you. BTW my driving instructor is Chilean (LATINO) , so he kinda knows. It's all cultural kiddos and besides people at school don't usually hollar because they see you everyday and they know you would take in a wrong way .

DONE.

[flaymzofice]

Mostly, high school is a small environment, even if you got 1000 students, everybody knows somebody who knows you and it'd be weird if they started thinking you were hot but didn't 'like' you...everyone knows what the high school rumour mill is like. In the 'outside' world, I check guys out if they're worth looking at, why not? Because I know I'm never gonna see him again so might as well appreciate it while he's there. Obviously, once you get to university, you do this less because you become disillusioned.

[prepsRule]

YAY . I can answer this one.
My driving instructor told me the answer to your problem. Since you mention older males also "mexican" males in general. Hehe. It's a cultrual thing. They don't necessary think you are HOT they just do it to bug you. They know that you get annoyed and they see it in your eyes and they get the joy of seeing you upset at a compliment. Take it in stride , someone looked at you. BTW my driving instructor is Chilean (LATINO) , so he kinda knows. It's all cultural kiddos and besides people at school don't usually hollar because they see you everyday and they know you would take in a wrong way .

DONE.

my mom and older sister told me how to deal wit this....I find it hilarious when I start cussing them out in spanish hehe they get all defensive but classifiying them as "mexicans" is kinda (no offense) racist I guess. Not to sound arrogant and stuff but yeah guys like me at school and is good is not jus "one type" of guy (hopefully yall kno wat i mean) though i get more attention at lets say the mall...All that matters is that u get noticed...and ur hopefully attracting the right kind of attention

[LittleLulu]

Like the ppl ubove me have said, i think in highschool if you're not in the "popular " crowd then boys won't be so keen in telling their friends that they like you.

For example, a guy in the popular guy's circle could like a girl, but not want ppl to know because she has a reputation of being nerdy or geeky or a loser or something along those lines, you know what i mean. But a label is just a label, it says nothing about who you are.

as for me, at school i don't get that much attention from guys. And quite frankly i couldn't care less. There have been a few times though, like some guy yelling "GO ALICE" when i demonstrated the macarena infront of the class and shaked my butt --_--", very embarrissing. And i found it EXTREMELY amusing when a guy of indian ethnicity who was a senior said "dayuumm" when i walked by him in the hallway. mainly because i didn't know he was referring to me until my friend pointed it out 3 seconds later.

While outside of highschool...HA. i've had hobos harrass me by touching my hair ...and this VERY old man wiggle his tongue at me as he drived by. It was truly disturbing.

[Trashley]

Being ugly and being beautiful isn't black or white--it's a sliding scale. As you get older, your standards decrease because reality crowds out your optimistic naivete. As your standards decrease, more women who would otherwise be below the benchmark are above the benchmark. As more women meet you requirements, you stare at and hit on more women. Not suprisingly, more women are then stared at by you.

People outside high school generlaly have lower standards--so they're probably more likely to think you're pretty if you're on the fence.

yeah what he/she said.

I use to be the ugliest little kid when I was like 11-12, no one ever dated me and looking back I had the ugliest style in school growing up when I was that young. But low and behold, of course all the older guys would think I was something special like you said.. honking horns, yelling things... stuff like that. But yeah pretty much what they said ^^

[Hiphop d[-_-]b]

Happens to everybody. Its cos boys suck.

[grab-it]

that happens heaps.
like people try to pick up me and my sister when we're walking down the road.
once this guy said to me
"hey sweetie, how much?"
.. yea its not cool..
they freak me out..
like how do you know that they arent guna get out of there car and freaking rape you or something.

[maddi.]

Heh. Happened to me like once. This guy at the smoothie place was kinda staring at me, then took the $.50 change off my total since he was "doing a good deed every day until Christmas." Yeah. Uh-huh.

My sister gets hit on all the time though, but that's cuz she's gorgeous.

[Smoogrish]

Yeah.. I feel pretty darn dirty when people outside give me those.. looks *shudder*. Especially since I just turned 13. I just think the kind of guy that does that is stupid and needs to get a life. Honestly, there are better things you can do than make cat-whistles to random "pretty" girls on the street.

[timeflies51]

Dude, I know what you mean!

Only one guy in my school has ever told me that I'm pretty in my four years here... However, outside of school I have gotten tons of compliments on my looks from plenty of guys!

Personally, I think it's because at school I carry some reputations (and some of them don't even apply anymore!). Or something.

Or who knows? Maybe the guys in my school just don't find me attractive.

[FoxBandCutie08]

Maybe they act like that because you have a certain reputation at school. It could be that they're so used to seeing you everyday that they don't think of you special. I don't know, that's normally how it is at my school, you just get used to how people look and stop complimenting them.