How do you tell someone you're gay?, plz help Options

[ayu_ku_fan]

I only discovered that I'm gay a few months ago when I really wanted to kiss my best friend, who is a guy. It freaked me out at first but now I'm not bothered.

Anyway, how I'm I supposed to tell people I know? I think that most of my friends would just act like they don't know me but I don't know what my best friend would do. I really want to stay friends but I also have a crush on him (if you seen him you would too, he's just too cute) and if I tell him I'm gay I'll have to tell him I like him too. So how do I tell people, him especially?

[*krnxswat*]

there's no good way. whatever you say or however you say it, he is going to be freaked out. he may not show it but, deep inside, he is. so just tell him flat out. but careful with the words you choose!

[Hiphop d[-_-]b]

there's no good way. whatever you say or however you say it, he is going to be freaked out. he may not show it but, deep inside, he is. so just tell him flat out. but careful with the words you choose!

True.

If you really want to tell him, you cant beat around the bush. Just say it. Its then that you'll find out who your true friends are.

[_sarcastic_]

what difference does it make if you say it one way or another?
yeah you should choose your words right, but it's not really going to affect how he's going to feel. good luck

[mouse_3k]

"Hi im gay" simple

[*krnxswat*]

^

no. not THAT simple.

[dahding]

just be honest. don't be like, "i'm gay. wanna have sex?" just break it to him slowly. if he's truly a good friend, he'll be supportive and understand. as seon ho said, of course he's gonna be freaked a little. but still, just be honest.

[ayu_ku_fan]

Thanks but how do i tell him? Do I tell him I need to talk to him and let him know somethings up or do I just add it into the conversation like I'm talking about the weather or something?

[*iNyCxShoRT*]

there's no good way. whatever you say or however you say it, he is going to be freaked out. he may not show it but, deep inside, he is. so just tell him flat out. but careful with the words you choose!

Agreed with krnxswat. There's no easy way to say it without him getting all "!". It depends on how mature he is. Do you think he's mature enough to take it? Well, maybe you shouldn't say it when you two are just alone. It may make him feel uncomfortable. If he's really your friend he'll understand.

[uLoVeMikeRoch]

I only discovered that I'm gay a few months ago when I really wanted to kiss my best friend, who is a guy. It freaked me out at first but now I'm not bothered.

Anyway, how I'm I supposed to tell people I know? I think that most of my friends would just act like they don't know me but I don't know what my best friend would do. I really want to stay friends but I also have a crush on him (if you seen him you would too, he's just too cute) and if I tell him I'm gay I'll have to tell him I like him too. So how do I tell people, him especially?

"Hey bob, I have to tell you something. I'm gay."

[ComradeRed]

Rape them during a camping trip like in Brokeback Mountain.

[ayu_ku_fan]

Rape them during a camping trip like in Brokeback Mountain.

Eh, there are 3 things wrong with that.
1. Rape is illegal
2. I don't want to hurt him
and 3. I'M NOT IN BROKEBACK MOUNTAIN!

Jeez some people just don't understand.

And uLoVeMikeRoch I think that might be the way I have to go about it. Now I just need to work up the nerve to do it, which is a totally different kettle of fish.

[*anubis*]

only tell people if you are truly ready yourself.

it's going to be very hard and you have to understand that everything--people around you will change. their attitudes around you will differentiate.

first of all, if you've only "discovered" this a few months ago, i don't think you're ready to tell people yet and just flat out say "oh i'm gay. what's for lunch?" because i don't think you're sure of yourself yet.

it could be plain curiosity. i'm guessing that you're not too old so it could be just raging hormones confusing you into thinking you like guys.

in order to tell people this feeling you have, you have to know and understand it yourself to begin with. i think you should not rush yourself and just give yourself some time to think it through and see how your body reacts sexually towards various people.

you might be surprised.

[ayu_ku_fan]

only tell people if you are truly ready yourself.

it's going to be very hard and you have to understand that everything--people around you will change. their attitudes around you will differentiate.

first of all, if you've only "discovered" this a few months ago, i don't think you're ready to tell people yet and just flat out say "oh i'm gay. what's for lunch?" because i don't think you're sure of yourself yet.

it could be plain curiosity. i'm guessing that you're not too old so it could be just raging hormones confusing you into thinking you like guys.

in order to tell people this feeling you have, you have to know and understand it yourself to begin with. i think you should not rush yourself and just give yourself some time to think it through and see how your body reacts sexually towards various people.

you might be surprised.

Thanks for that but I'm pretty sure I'm not gay, just bisexual but I like guys more than girls right now so I'll just say that I'm gay for the time-being. I do know that everything is gonna change between me and him but I feel he has a right to know. I mean he tells me things and I tell him things and this is just one of those things.

[demolished]

Dont even say it ... yet. Wait 'till both of you guys built a strong friendship ... he'll understand better ... and will be a bit handy for you to speak out.

[ComradeRed]

Eh, there are 3 things wrong with that.
1. Rape is illegal

So is gambling; are you telling me you've never had friends over for poker?

2. I don't want to hurt him

Have you ever heard of imperfect information? Your friend is latently gay and by raping him he will realize that and thus you will live happily ever after. Thus, you are actually doing him a favor.

and 3. I'M NOT IN BROKEBACK MOUNTAIN!

Oh come, that's a lame excuse. Get in touch with your inner white trash cowboy!

Jeez some people just don't understand.

Yeah... some people like you!

[*lil_chubby_cheeks2*]

So is gambling; are you telling me you've never had friends over for poker?
Have you ever heard of imperfect information? Your friend is latently gay and by raping him he will realize that and thus you will live happily ever after. Thus, you are actually doing him a favor.
Oh come, that's a lame excuse. Get in touch with your inner white trash cowboy!
Yeah... some people like you!

youre not helping...

but yeahh
i think you should just tell people who you trust the most. theyll be shocked but knowing is better than not knowing.

[ayu_ku_fan]

Dont even say it ... yet. Wait 'till both of you guys built a strong friendship ... he'll  understand better ... and will be a bit handy for you to speak out.

We are good friends. I've known him for years! He's the one who just said out of the blue "I really need a wank"

That really shocked me cuz he's usually very quiet and shy. I guess he's just comfortable around me.

So is gambling; are you telling me you've never had friends over for poker?

No, I'm 15.

Have you ever heard of imperfect information? Your friend is latently gay and by raping him he will realize that and thus you will live happily ever after. Thus, you are actually doing him a favor.

How is raping him doing him a favor? He could be traumatized for life.

Oh come, that's a lame excuse. Get in touch with your inner white trash cowboy!

I haven't seen that movie or tv show or whatever.

[ComradeRed]

How is raping him doing him a favor? He could be traumatized for life.

OR he might get in touch with his inner homo and you two could live happily ever after. Sometimes, you've got to take a risk.

I haven't seen that movie or tv show or whatever.

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0388795/

IMDB gives it a 7.7; it's good...

[_suzie_]

OK heres what u do.

seeing as u only ''discovered' a few months back, well take it slow. tell your friend that you think u might be bisexual or whatever. he'll be shocked but meh, he's your friend and will stick by ya.

[ComradeRed]

Actually, I'm a guy and if my best friend told me he was bisexual, I'd be slightly creeped out ("Why are you telling me this? Can't you keep it to yourself? Are you hitting on me?")

Which is why I say camping trip rape is the way to go.

[Ilaem]

Yeah. My friend, just told me the other day she was a lesbian and wanted to have a relationship with me. She told me straight up. Although i'm straight, I told her i would think about it to avoid her feeling strange or stupid. I'm planning on telling her no today.

[ayu_ku_fan]

Actually, I'm a guy and if my best friend told me he was bisexual, I'd be slightly creeped out ("Why are you telling me this? Can't you keep it to yourself? Are you hitting on me?")

Which is why I say camping trip rape is the way to go.

I don't want advise from you anymore! You're too rude lol!

[Maximum_Tune815]

go tell him. "hey.. we've been frds for a long time and just recently..i've...fallen in love with yooh. Will yooh bee my bf? (if he answer no) It's okay.. i still want to bee frds with yooh. Will yooh accept mee for who i am?" then afterwards go rape him =P

[duplicatex0x0x0]

If your friends know you well enough, especially your best friends, or the ones that you have known for a long time, could have a hint that they keep to themselves that you are gay. If you're friends truely are your friends, then they will accept you for who you are and not be judgemental of you for your sexuality.

There are many ways that you can approach telling people that you are gay: One way that you can tell someone is by leading them on, and droping hints left and right that you are. Another way that you can tell someone is make up a person, and discuss that the person is gay, and how would your friends interact with him/her. Another way that you can tell someone, is you can point out a person that you think is good looking. (of the same sex) and tell your friend that you think that he is cute, or w/e. See how your friend takes it, and react upon that. The last way that I know how you could tell someone is to just come out and say it straight up. "I'm gay"

Hope I helped you in your conquest.

[ayu_ku_fan]

Thanx tcunningham1589, that acctuly helps a lot.

[duplicatex0x0x0]

You're welcome, I was glad to help.

[ParanoidAndroid]

Thanks but how do i tell him? Do I tell him I need to talk to him and let him know somethings up or do I just add it into the conversation like I'm talking about the weather or something?

um how about start with, "Hey I have something to tell you, and since ur my good friend, I trust you with my words" or somewhere along that line

//edit i guess that guy helped you..oh well

[ayu_ku_fan]

thanx for all your help guys. I'll tell him when school starts again this week. I can see his reaction now:

Hello
What?
You're gay?
And you have a crush on me?
(and I hope)
And the big deal is...?

[sharpandcuddly]

Speak your mind because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.

Just tell him. If he gets freaked out, there are always more fish in the sea. And always great friends you haven't met.

[ayu_ku_fan]

Well I told him.

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HE WANTS TO GO OUT WITH ME!

Yeah, this is so cool. He thinks he could be bi too and wants to try going out with a guy to see what it's like!

I told him on Tuesday and he did seem confused when I told him I liked him. He said to me, "Why do you like me? I'm really short." I just said to him "So? Who cares about what size you are?"

We sat and talked about it for about half an hour. He asked me things like "How long have I known?" and "Why didn't I tell him when I found out?"

One question he asked got me kinda nervous. He asked me if I ever dreamed about him. Honestly, I did and still do. Then he asked if I would consider kissing him cuz he wanted to know if he was gay. And I did kiss him. It was my first kiss ever and I loved every second of it and by the look in his face I'd say he did too.

Well we've been going out for 3 days and I've already kissed him like a gazillion times. Our parents surprisingly don't really mind as long as we don't kiss in front of them and stuff. I did kiss him in front of my 13 year old brother yesturday and he just kinda freaked. Well he shouldn't have been in my room.

Thanks for all the help you guys gave me. Look what happened. I'm sooooo happy I told him! Thanx guys!

[s_parker_luver]

well. there's no "good ways" to tell someone you're gay. if you're ready, just tell them. don't be afraid that they might act like they don't know you, because true friend won't go away just becoz you're gay. seriously. there's nth wrong with being gay. i have a lot of friends that are lez or bisexual and i don't find anything wrong with that.
so. if you're ready. just gather up the courage and tell him your feelings