Boyfriend//Best friend ISSUE!!! Help?, Gah... |
 Nov 12 2005, 08:46 AM
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#1
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Member  Group: Member Posts: 10 Joined: Nov 2005 Member No: 290,550  |
Okay, my boyfriend is absolutely the most perfect person in the world for me. He's so unbelievably... Seriously, we're like puzzle pieces. Every part of him connects with me just so perfectly; we're one of those nauseatingly cute couples... Haha, I know it's stupid. But... Okay, over the summer, he was only my best friend. My big brother even. He was actually really really REALLY crushing on my best friend... Like, he wanted to spend the rest of his LIFE with her... And after she gave him a straight "NO." he crawled to me for help. I was on the phone with this boy for twelve hours a day, talking to him, consoling him, comforting him. After a while... We just clicked. I always wondered if I was just her rebound, and I know I was. It's a hell of a lot different now, he says he doesn't think about her at all anymore... And that he loves me more than he could EVER have loved her... And yet, when the three of us are together with a few other close friends... He flirts with her like CRAZY. Sometimes, he'll even ignore me. SHE'S MY BEST FRIEND. WHAT THE HELL IS HE DOING?! And it's not like he doesn't KNOW he's doing it!!! Once, he said "Ruby, I know me and Muna flirt a lot... It doesn't bother you does it?" "No..." YEAH IT BOTHERS ME!!! And my other best friend (his best friend too) tells me, "Don't you ever get jealous? I hear more about Amber and Muna than I hear about you..." What do I do?? I know I should talk to him... But what do I say?
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Nov 12 2005, 09:18 AM
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#2
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 <3 Group: Member Posts: 3,657 Joined: Nov 2004 Member No: 64,493 |
well he obviously still has a little feeling for muna, and it kinda looks like he's not worth your time at all, he even has the guts to tell you he flirts with muna. i mean his bestfriend even says he hears bout other girls more than he hears bout you.
ask him why he's doing this i guess. |
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Nov 12 2005, 09:47 AM
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#3
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Member Group: Member Posts: 10 Joined: Nov 2005 Member No: 290,550 |
I dunno... I kinda wonder if maybe he talks about other girls because he sees them more? I mean.. He lives two hours away.. And Muna and Amber live ten minutes from his house...
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Nov 12 2005, 12:25 PM
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#4
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 hi. call me linda. Group: Official Member Posts: 8,187 Joined: Feb 2004 Member No: 3,475 |
Tell him that his flirting bothers you. It sounds like he might still have feelings for her if he still flirts with her, even in front of you. Ask him why he doesn't talk about you.
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Nov 12 2005, 12:32 PM
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#5
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 dakishimetainoni... Group: Staff Alumni Posts: 4,322 Joined: Dec 2004 Member No: 75,318 |
i hate to say it but maybe you were his rebound girl...after your best friend turned him town, you were there for him so naturally he'd have feelings for you.
you should really talk to him about that flirting thing. of course it bothers you it would probably bother everyone if their current boyfriend/girlfriend flirts with an ex crush in front of their face. some people don't think flirting is a big deal and when he asked you if it bothered you, you said yes so maybe he just doesn't know that what he's doing is bad. just because he doesn't talk about you doesn't mean too much...some people like to keep their relationship a secret so it's just between them, making it more special. i don't go around blabbing about the guy i'm seeing because some things should just be private, and when it gets serious, then you can tell people. |
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Nov 12 2005, 02:00 PM
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#6
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Senior Member Group: Member Posts: 82 Joined: Aug 2005 Member No: 190,340 |
Wow....hows about you turn the tables on him...Don't be clingy..back away from him a while...dont break up just give him room. Dont act upset about anything just pull back & start flirting with other people. If he can do it, you can too! & maybe he'll see what he's doing. Guys don't know what they do is wrong unless you show them exactly what they are doing.
Hope this helps(it works on my b/f!) |
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| *iNyCxShoRT* |
Nov 12 2005, 03:06 PM
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#7
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Guest |
You should definately start speaking up. I mean if you keep lying and saying that no, it doesn't bother you then of course he'll keep on doing it.
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Nov 12 2005, 05:58 PM
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#8
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Member Group: Member Posts: 24 Joined: Aug 2004 Member No: 39,068 |
hmm...it kinda sounds like he has feelings for both of you guys. Tell him the flirting bothers you...
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Nov 13 2005, 02:59 AM
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#9
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 yan lin♥ Group: Staff Alumni Posts: 14,129 Joined: Apr 2004 Member No: 13,627 |
talk to both of them. communication is key.
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Nov 13 2005, 07:26 AM
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#10
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 naïvety Group: Human Posts: 1,303 Joined: Jan 2004 Member No: 488 |
QUOTE(ahmegnutmeg @ Nov 12 2005, 8:46 PM) Once, he said "Ruby, I know me and Muna flirt a lot... It doesn't bother you does it?" "No..." YEAH IT BOTHERS ME!!!  Next time LET HIM KNOW IT BOTHERS YOU. Or.... "Ruby, I know me and Muna flirt a lot... It doesn't bother you, does it?" "No, not at all. I understand completely. [big smile] It's human nature, right? [wink]" At this point skip carelessly away (but stay in sight) and start flirting with his best friend. 
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Nov 14 2005, 09:19 AM
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#11
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Member Group: Member Posts: 10 Joined: Nov 2005 Member No: 290,550 |
Thanks so much you guys, it really helped. I flirted with his best friend, it bothered him, we talked, I told him hedoesn't do it anymore. He was actually really really sorry. But he KNEW it bothered me... He just didn't think it bothered me THAT much. So whatever, we're okay now. :)
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Nov 14 2005, 10:12 AM
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#12
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 Nobody Knows... Group: Member Posts: 33 Joined: Mar 2005 Member No: 113,659 |
You should seriously dump his ass. I mean, He's using you only as a means of getting closer to your friend.
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Nov 14 2005, 10:24 AM
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#13
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c[: Group: Member Posts: 2,302 Joined: Feb 2004 Member No: 2,876 |
OMIGOSHA!!!!!
 i would totally drop kick him in the nuggies...stupid figgster...grrr...if you knew you was his rebound why did you go with him?  if i was you and you really wanted to be with him, just talk to him about it, just tell him that the flirting bothers the hell outa you....and that you've heard that he's been talking about those other girls more than he talks about you...but if that doesnt work, then if i were you, i would totally dump his sorrie lame ash  ++edit oooh yehh!! you should talk to that "best friend" of yours too! hahaha..pssh if she was your best friend she would not be flirting with your man like that...if you asked me thats not even a friend 
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