should i let my daughter go out ? Options

[crazi_in_love_08]

ok well my daughter is 15 n this guy that asked her to go see a movie is 18 , they have a class together in school. i met him yesterday n he seems like a pretty kewl kid. i trust my daughter to not do sumthing stupid, but i dont think i trust him all the way.. what should i do ?? btw this is her account .. im just tryin to get advice from u guys

[PreludeTears]

ok well my daughter is 15 n this guy that asked her to go see a movie is 18 , they have a class together in school. i met him yesterday n he seems like a pretty kewl kid. i trust my daughter to not do sumthing stupid, but i dont think i trust him all the way.. what should i do ?? btw this is her account .. im just tryin to get advice from u guys

Yeah you should, its just the movies. But if it gets more serious then that I dont think you should because shes only 15 and hes 18, maybe he was all nice in front of you and yeah you trust your her, but must I tell you high school is the untold story of the elementary book, you see my point?

[*tweeak*]

Why do I get the impression that this is a "hypothetical" situation that you're writing about yourself?

Honestly, if you want to pose as a parent, a) learn to spell, b) take the 08 out of your username, as that typically indicates graduation year, c) use proper grammar (most adults don't type like illiterate teens), and d) don't type like your "15 year old daughter"

[crazi_in_love_08]

like i said b4 this is my daughters username.. Im just on here, and yes she knows. I have alwasy typed like this n i dont see anything wrong with it .. anyways .. how old are u guys ?? im 30

[PreludeTears]

im 16, 17 on March Mrs. But I must slightly agree with the young lady below my first comment, you dont type like a 30 year old woman

[*tweeak*]

If you're 30, why do you have a 15 year old daughter? Come on, I know some people do get pregnant at 15, but... You're typing in niether complete sentences nor with appropriate punctuation or capitalization. There are few adults who won't type out the entire word "and." Plus, a good many more errors that I won't get into because I can't be bothered and would sound far too nitpicky. But anyway, how could you possibly have gotten through 30 years of life typing like that? It was a pretty recent thing to start that anyway, so you've "always" done it and "don't see a problem with it?" Bullshit.

[OhXiet_ItzDonnA]

Well, if you trust her, you should let her go. But you can tell your daughter to be careful if the guy look like he might do something. I dont think she would do anything in the movies with people around.

[AngryBaby]

haha, well then....you dont type like a mom, at all. but maybe your just trying to relate to us or something . but i dont understand that if you were a kid just posing as a parent, what would you get out of this? so thats the only reason that i think there is a possibilty you may be a mother. but i dont think you are....
because why would you ask for our advice? knowing the majority of the people here are gonna probably say "yes, you should let her go". my mom wouldnt do it i tell you that haha.

[elaboratedream]

anyways .. how old are u guys ?? im 30

wait, if you're 30 that means you must have had a bf when you were 15... and you went all the way with him when you were 15. let her go out with him... are you afraid she'll make the same mistakes you did?

but anyways, I agree with the other people. You don't type like a 30 year old and if you are just a kid pretended to be a parent, you need to get a life or something. what are you gonna get out of this?

[Azn Kid from NY]

..i think if that guys 18, and he has any sexual relationship with ur 15 year old daughter, that would be considered rape isnt it? cuz shes a minor and he's an adult.....

[Spirited Away]

Whaaat? Er. I'm just a little uncomfortable with a 30 year-old using the word "kewl", leaving letters out of words, and type "u" where "o's" are needed.

Anyway, I think if you'd like extensive feedback, you'll need to give us more information on the young man. Telling us that he was "kewl" doesn't say much about his maturity or intention.

[_sarcastic_]

woa woa you can't be 30... your daughter's already 15 O.o
anyways, jsut trust her let her go out.

[*RiC3xBoy*]

Intersting, you are 30, and you have a 15 year old daughter. Yea, and my milkshake brings all the boys to the yard,

[silver-rain]

Yeah, somehow, I don't believe that you're 30 years old...
But, I would say that if you trust her, just let her out to the movies this time. But, if the relationship progresses, make sure he has the best intentions for her and won't take advantage of her. Tell her to be careful too.

[technicolour]

A. I highly doubt you are 30.
B. If a 30 year old types lyk dis then I'm highly disturbed.
C. No. You should lock your daughter up in a convent.

  ..i think if that guys 18, and he has any sexual relationship with ur 15 year old daughter, that would be considered rape isnt it? cuz shes a minor and he's an adult.....

It would. Exactly why you should lock her up in a convent. She'll find love. Come on. Sound of music here...

[lbjshaq2345]

If you're 30, why do you have a 15 year old daughter? Come on, I know some people do get pregnant at 15, but... You're typing in niether complete sentences nor with appropriate punctuation or capitalization. There are few adults who won't type out the entire word "and." Plus, a good many more errors that I won't get into because I can't be bothered and would sound far too nitpicky. But anyway, how could you possibly have gotten through 30 years of life typing like that? It was a pretty recent thing to start that anyway, so you've "always" done it and "don't see a problem with it?" Bullshit.

shut the f**k up tweeak this aint grammar school

[technicolour]

shut the f**k up tweeak this aint grammar school

How about you? A 30 year old who has gone through high school, and most likely, college should know how to type right. Maturity shows when you get older. Obviously you're an exception to this.


You, too, need to go to grammar school.

[Azn Kid from NY]

shut the f**k up tweeak this aint grammar school

^
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^

[yummy_delight]

1. I don't think you're 30 YOU ARE NOT 30. Don't insult our intelligence by telling us that you're 30.
2. I'm going to treat this as a hypothetical situation, since you are definitely NOT 30 years old.

I understand that your "daughter" may be trustworthy. HOWEVER, this guy is 18 years old. She is 15. Does statutory (forgive my spelling if it's incorrect) rape ring any bells? It might not happen, but let's face it. That's what guys want. In the interest of your "daughter's" safety, I wouldn't allow her to date him... unless of course you chaperone.

[aznxdreamer]

welcome to "you must have perfect grammar and spelling or else everyone will kill you" land

[Spirited Away]

shut the f**k up tweeak this aint grammar school

Um, grammar and spelling has to do with the topic starter belittling our intelligence, yours included, in this topic. Do you not get it?

[*mzkandi*]

Ok, if you dont believe its her then dont post in here and you do give her some advice. Simple? I thought so.

[shadkitty]

Alright then...I'm 20 going on 21. I've got two little ones, 2 and 1/2, and 7 months. I've been there done that: as in I've been the younger girl, and the older...um well still girl.

If you are thirty then, as was posted before, you must have had a child at the same age. Maybe you are afraid that the same thing will happen.

Here's what I have to say: Let the girl go out, maybe with a chaperone if you need one to make you feel more comfortable. Meet the guys parents. No matter what happens...kids will be kids and will do what they want. But it's better to know what's going on, reach a compromise. You can't lock a child up forever. One of two things will happen: they'll rebel and be super wild and crazy when you're not looking, or they'll be way sheltered and when they get out into "the real world" they will drown. This world is not a good place. Sorry to say, bad things happen, and you can't protect anyone 100% of the time.

[*mipadi*]

Well, if he's really "kewl" than yeah, let her go out with him. I mean, what's the worst that can happen?


Wait, no, that's not right. What I really meant was this:

Whaaat? Er.  I'm just a little uncomfortable with a 30 year-old using the word "kewl", leaving letters out of words, and type "u" where "o's" are needed.

[coconutter]

My dad talks illiterate. I'm like, dad please type correctly. He's all, c and see they're the same thing. I'm like that's not the point, some parents are just weird like that.

[AngryBaby]

maybe! maybe! she is the mother! and, and she purposely typed like a 8 yr old so we wouldnt believe she was a mom only to get the most honest answers from us so she can really know! so she can get answers like robb0 gave her!...yeah, you see how im thinkin? ehh? ehhhh!? i bet that just blew your mind!

[Hiphop d[-_-]b]

You should let her.
Trust her a little, she'll appreciate it a lot even if she acts like she doesnt. Believe me, she does.

[sprezzatura]

Seriously, I am almost sure that you are lying. Unless you gave birth to a girl when you are 15. ADULTS DO NOT "TYPE LYK DIS"

[Aoiro]

Well, talk to her.
Even if she thinks it's going to be annoying to hear you say this long lecture, it;s better than nothing.
3 years is in a way a big difference, but just give them one date.
See how everything goes, and even after the date she likes him even more, don't let them date again.
Not any time soon.
Talk to him again.

[kpgrl4eva]

...yea, sure, let "her" go out.

[*salcha*]

I wonder what your daughter will say when she sees this.

[mouse_3k]

wow ok everyone chill. It dont matter how she types, she needs advice. instead of wasting all your time on complaining and b!tching on how she types, why dont you actually help her damn.

my dad types like that and I dont care. as long as hes happy and feels young again he can do it. So yall get ova it, its only a style of writing. This isnt English class.

ANYWAYS, I think you SHOULDNT let them go out. I mean it can escalate into a bigger thing. He is 18..she is what? 15? shes to young to be going out with him. shes a minor, hes a adult. if he was lookin for the perfect girl, he would be goin with a girl just as or older then him. Hes probably just lookin for younger girls for easy ass. My sister and her boyfriend, who is soon to be 18, ugh..he is stupid and talks about his conquests in his former girls pants to the football team, he talks alot of stuff, but oh well.

dont let them go out. I promise you, she will start dressing like a slut, acting like one, having a attitude, thinkin shes the sh!t, stuck up, and then get pregnant and he will leave. trust me, my sister is goin through that cycle but shes at the Stuck Up stage. NE who, dont let them go out

[crazi_in_love_08]

ok. I will type right ... just for you guys who don't like the other way.

1. i dont like to be perfect and make sure everything i type is correct. Thats not who i am
2. Im sorry i am a young mother. i got mixed up with the wrong kids at school and i ended up pregnant by someone who was older. this is why i am asking for your advice.
3. i am a little scared to let her go out with older guys because i do not want her to be like me
i want her to grow up. get married have a family n house of her own.

[aznxdreamer]

hey people, shush with thte grammar and typing and just answer the question cuz im sure she didnt come on here to have an english lecture. JEEZ. cb people...

[megan_x3]

As all the other people have said ; you don't type like a 30 yearold Mom. And of course why don't you let your 15 year old daughter go out? Are you afraid that she will make the same mistakes as you ? If you are uncomfortable letting her go, then don't let her. If you've seen that guy and think that he's safe enough to be around with, then let her go.

[AngryBaby]

So.. um...i may be completely slow, but what would the "mother" get from my *ahem* polite response?

honesty, haha

like when you said,

"if you like him, go out with him.
if you trust him enough, go out with him.
if you're certain you won't get raped, go out with him.
if you know that you'll scream for help or fight back if he does try anything, go out with him.
if your mom doesn't let you, tough shit. "

she might know how we really feel now, instead of us going "mam, i think with all do respect, you should let your dearest daughter go" haha i dunno maybe im just over analyzing but you never knoooooowww!

[CrazayChristian]

Bull shit you're 30, no 30 year old types like that.

[Azn Kid from NY]

^
^
^
^
^
in the year 2000 she was only 25 years old....and believe it or not, the internet did exist back then, and 25 year olds did type like that....so why is it so amazing that she might type like that now?

[steezahh]

Why do I get the impression that this is a "hypothetical" situation that you're writing about yourself?

Honestly, if you want to pose as a parent, a) learn to spell, b) take the 08 out of your username, as that typically indicates graduation year, c) use proper grammar (most adults don't type like illiterate teens), and d) don't type like your "15 year old daughter"

i agree i read your profile and your around the age of 15! stop posin` its not gonna get you no-where

[*mzkandi*]

Before I start verbal warning people, let me repeat myself.

Ok, if you dont believe its her then dont post in here and you do give her some advice. Simple? I thought so.

[technicolour]

i agree i read your profile and your around the age of 15! stop posin` its not gonna get you no-where

She said that she was on her "daughters" screenname.

But seriously. People who are 30 don't typ lyk dis fo' sho'.

[PinkTrash]

Why does it matter if she's lieing about her age or not anyway? It wouldn't matter in anyway.. she's not gaining anything. Atleast in my point of view she isn't..
Also, you can't say she finished high school. Afterall you guys 'theorized' that she had her daughter at 15, and maybe she dropped out. Stop assuming..

And no. If I were you, I wouldnt let my daughter date the guy. Since you did have your daughter at 15[?] and made the same mistake as her[?] just tell her about your experience. Or if thats not true.. then just make up a story =) but get it through thats it not good for her to date an 18 year old. Sure, a friendly hang outs here and there but make sure nothing serious happends.

[anniepiee]

Ok, if you dont believe its her then dont post in here and you do give her some advice. Simple? I thought so.

why dont people understand..

aznxdreamer Posted Sep 29 2005, 1:55 PM
  hey people, shush with thte grammar and typing and just answer the question cuz im sure she didnt come on here to have an english lecture. JEEZ. cb people...

i second that.


replying to the topic. if you've met the guy and he seems nice.. give him a chance.. let her go out with him once or twice.. maybe get to know about the details from your daughter?
but guys can be good at seducing.

[Spirited Away]

wow ok everyone chill. It dont matter how she types, she needs advice. instead of wasting all your time on complaining and b!tching on how she types, why dont you actually help her damn.

my dad types like that and I dont care. as long as hes happy and feels young again he can do it. So  yall get ova it, its only a style of writing. This isnt English class.

why dont people understand..

Why does it matter if she's lieing about her age or not anyway? It wouldn't matter in anyway.. she's not gaining anything. Atleast in my point of view she isn't..
Also, you can't say she finished high school. Afterall you guys 'theorized' that she had her daughter at 15, and maybe she dropped out. Stop assuming.

Stop assuming? Aren't you assuming that she's telling the truth? As far as I'm concern, we're all assuming and a lot of assumptions have to be made since the topic starter haven't told us much about the situation. I can agree that it [grammar problem] doesn't really matter, but many of us are just uncomfortable with a 30 year-old writing like that, and members have a right to "speak" their minds so long as it doesn't involve bashing and/or breaking the rules. Nothing more, nothing less.

A lot of times, criticism comes along with advice and the advice seeker has to deal with that. In this situation, I feel that if she is to tell her daugher who she can and cannot date the mother has to be mature and serious manner. That's why I said I was uncomfortable about this whole thing. If the daughter is willful enough, she will do as she likes even if the mother protests against it. I can't just imagine the daughter saying "I'm different from you and I won't make the same mistake". Why would she be different? Because the child may think she's more mature than her mother. Psychologically, it happens. We always hear kids say "I'm NOT LIKE YOU" when they get into arguments with their parents.

Yes, in my opinion, how a person type/write—for the most part, reflect a sense of maturity, respect for others and responsibily. If you don't agree, that's fine, but don't tell me what I can and cannot say to the topic starter because I'm not breaking any rules.

I don't feel like I'm wasting my time posting this either. If I had felt that, I wouldn't be posting.

To the topic starter, I apologize for offending you. I know you're in a tough situation with figuring out what's right for your daughter, but I wanted to voice that you must keep in perspective who you're asking for advice from. If you want to be "kewl" and type like a kid, go for it, but I fear the responses you get will be from kids who will most likely give a biased advice and defend your daughter. In any case, good luck with her.

[EddieV]

I just checked her profile, she's only 15...

[Spirited Away]

because she's using her daughter's account she said. silly eddie.

where's my tanto you?

[topsyturvy]

^
^
^
Hear, hear.

[nsmx1korean]

i hate parents that tell there kids that they cant do anything, gosh my parents used to be like that then i gave them the cold sholder and they started to give me everything i want hahahah

[kodomo_ja_nai]

give your daughter advice about dating so that she can make an informed decision about who she goes out with. i mean, a three-year difference isn't that big at all. you're probably worried because your daughter just entered high school ... and also the fact that most people who get raped never report it to the authorities.
just don't make it seem like your choking her with what you have to say. don't make it come out like, "i don't want you to hang out with this person. you always have to go through me before you make friends." cuz she'll hate you for life if you do that. i know i hate my mother for that...

[Spirited Away]

^ my parents told me those things and did some crazy things to make sure I obey house rules, and for a while, I felt suffocated. Nowdays, I appreciate them for being so keen on keeping a tight leash on me.

I agree that giving the daughter some advice would be helpful, however, even with information, people still do whatever it is they feel like doing. After all, there are warnings on every cigarette carton about cancer, whatnot, but people still smoke. Smoking is an addiction, and rebelling in the case of dating can be, too, driven by a need to conform to other dating peers and/or freedom from a nagging parent. Every child is different and recognizing the child's unique attitudes and thought process, in my opinion, can at least have an idea of how the situation may be treated. This may be achieved by attentive parents, I think.

[misoshiru]

so lets just say that what you're saying is all real. my advice is, give her a talk on why you might not trust him, and how "stupid" you were at her age. and let her think it over, and if she still wants to go out with him, then let her, if anything happens, she'll have to suffer the consequences.

[*x____duckii*]

So  yall get ova it, its only a style of writing.

That is NOT a style of writing; it's a form of illiteracy.

Anyhoo, you are NOT a 30 year old mother.

Im just on here, and yes she knows.

See, right there, you pretty much proved that this isn't her mother.



How? Because if a mother was seeking advice, she would NOT ask her daughter if she could post on her account to ask a question. That'd just be silly.

Anyways, tell your "daughter" that she shouldn't go all the way with the guy, no matter how much she trusts him.

[bad_girl]

yeah you should. i mean, she's 15, i think she knows what to && not to do.

anyways, im just wondering but, did your daughter give you permission to use her cB account?? or are you just using it...?

edit.//

Anyhoo, you are NOT a 30 year old mother.
See, right there, you pretty much proved that this isn't her mother.
How? Because if a mother was seeking advice, she would NOT ask her daughter if she could post on her account to ask a question. That'd just be silly.

Anyways, tell your "daughter" that she shouldn't go all the way with the guy, no matter how much she trusts him.

kind of true actually..

[*grrfield*]

That is NOT a style of writing; it's a form of illiteracy.

Anyhoo, you are NOT a 30 year old mother.
See, right there, you pretty much proved that this isn't her mother.
How? Because if a mother was seeking advice, she would NOT ask her daughter if she could post on her account to ask a question. That'd just be silly.

Anyways, tell your "daughter" that she shouldn't go all the way with the guy, no matter how much she trusts him.

who cares, just answer the question and move on

i think that if you really want to protect her, don't let her. she's too young.

[Spirited Away]

who cares, just answer the question and move on

obviously the writer of that post cared. why don't you just answer the question and move on like you suggested?

[tequila_sky]

wow I also got the vibe that this was not a 15 yr old, but some of the comments posted here have been nasty. If u are a 30 yr old well, just trust them. At the end of the day, you know you cant control your kids beyond a certain age. And if you are the 15 yr old, listen to ur mother! Haha, she knows why she told you you cant go.

[*anubis*]

shut the f**k up tweeak this aint grammar school

you read my mind

i was waiting for someone to say that!

[ParanoidAndroid]

I don't think so

She might say, "oh you're the worst mom ever" to pull a guilt trip on you but be strong and do what's best. I think the best answer is say no cuz really, why would an 18-year old want to go out with a 15-year old if not for sex? OR maybe he's just into younger people like that... if you trust your daughter let her, but if not, then obviously no

[x3chrissyx3]

Well, I don't have any children yet, but I'm pregnant with a baby which I hope is a girl, haha. My opinion? Let your daughter date him. She's 15, sure she may not be at her maturity peak, but she's a young teenager, and that's okay. You can't keep her as "your little girl" forever, and I know it's hard to let your child go, but it was going to happen sooner or later that she was dating someone older than her. She's 15, he's 18, she's still a minor, and if that's what's concerning you, don't be too worried. I think you should trust your daughter to make the right decision on her own. IF she does end up having sex with him (if that's what you're worried about...) then it's her body, her decision and if she gets hurt in the end, maybe she'll learn her lesson. You have to let kids learn their own lessons. You can't try to shelter them. Now, you were 15 when you had your daughter, and if you were responsible enough to take care of a baby, I certainly think your daughter is responsible enough to make the right choices when she's out on a date with the 18 year old boy.

(By the way, I'm 21, my husband is 24. It's the same age difference as your daughter's and that boy's. It doesn't sound so bad now, does it? It's just because 15 sounds so young and 18 sounds so old compared to that...)

This post has been edited by x3chrissyx3: Oct 2 2005, 06:46 PM

[toodlepops.]

If I was a 30 year old mom with a 15-year old daughter, I wouldn't go on an internet forum to ask a bunch of teenagers whether or not I should let my daughter go on a date. But that's just me. =)

[*mipadi*]

(By the way, I'm 21, my husband is 24. It's the same age difference as your daughter's and that boy's. It doesn't sound so bad now, does it? It's just because 15 sounds so young and 18 sounds so old compared to that...)

The age difference between 21 and 24, and 15 and 18, might be equal, but it's not really the same. A 21- and 24-year-old are both more mature relative to one another than an 18- and 15-year-old.

[*Weird addiction*]

FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, QUIT JUDGING HER AND GIVE HER THE ADVICE SHE NEEDS! You all are so annoying, "i know it all"... petits gamins de merde.

Anyways, you should let her go.

[*xcaitlinx*]

wow...a lot of people on cB have issues. "OMG U TYPE LIEK UR 10!!!! THERES NO WAY UR 30!!! U COULDNT HAVE HAD A BABY WHEN U WERE 15..IM GUNNA GO CALL THE CB COPS ON U!!" if she isn't really a mother, then get over it..that's HER problem, not yours.

how about SHUT UP and find something better to bitch about? thanksss.
-------------
if you met the guy and thoguth that he was nice, maybe you should let your daughter go on a movie date with him. one date can't hurt. there are a lot of jerks out there that only think about sex so i'd make sure he's actually as "kewl" as you think he is.

[Spirited Away]

wow...a lot of people on cB have issues. "OMG U TYPE LIEK UR 10!!!! THERES NO WAY UR 30!!! U COULDNT HAVE HAD A BABY WHEN U WERE 15..IM GUNNA GO CALL THE CB COPS ON U!!" if she isn't really a mother, then get over it..that's HER problem, not yours.

FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, QUIT JUDGING HER AND GIVE HER THE ADVICE SHE NEEDS! You all are so annoying, "i know it all"... petits gamins de merde.

She's asking for PUBLIC ADVICE, which obviously means it became everyone's concern. Come on guys, we're addressing a social problem as well as the familial one and the two have everything to do with the advice we give.

[*tweeak*]

Oh honestly, bitching at people by saying the same thing repeatedly is not helping anything either

[*Weird addiction*]

Fae, she asked if she should let her daughter go out.

Anyhoo, you are NOT a 30 year old mother.

WTF? You are in NO position to say that. Even if you think so! In other words, you are saying that "this person" isn't a good mother. She asked for your advice not you silly critisism. sp?.

[BarreL]

i think this is a big fake personally .
lots and lots of gaps and stuff in it .

i'm 15 and i cant stand to type " kewl " and all that stuff .

but eh , if youre the real deal
just let your daughter go out
trust her
and if you think shes breeching (sp?) yalls little trust majiggy
terminate the relationship

hell if i know .

[Spirited Away]

sandra, i answered and added my concern and said that criticism comes along with advice most of the time.

[*Weird addiction*]

Most of the time, but there are times when it isn't needed.

[Spirited Away]

Whether it's needed is situational. In this case, since she used informal language, it was apparent to everyone that this is an informal situation where criticism is very much okay so long as it ties in to the subject. There's a lot of things she doesn't need, like advice from young folks who only know things from their own experience and not from their mother's or an older adult's.

Seriously, not everyone who has responded know what it's like to be a mother dealing with a teenage daughter. It may sound easy for a young person to say "just trust your daughter" because that's what these kids want from their own parents, but this is beyond trust between mother and child—it's trusting the young man who the mother knows nothing about aside that he's "kewl", among other factors. In my opinion, she doesn't need people telling her to "trust" her daughter everytime either, but I wasn't complaining about that [until now].

If a person is seeking advice from the public at large, he/she should be prepared for anything. I apologized before that I and others have upset her with our doubts about her age, but it's as much our rights to do so as it is her right to type the way she does.

But anyway, I guess now that enough people have expressed the same sentiments, any more "you're not really 30 yrs-old" responses would be spam since it's repeating what everyone else said.

[me1issaaaa]

Notice how this "arent" hasn't responded since last month. I'm just not buying the fact that this person is 30. Although in a few movies, like Closer and ... whatever that one was with Jack Nicholson and Diane Keaton and Keanu Reeves... yeah. They typed funny like that, but then again, those were just movies.

And how do we know this isn't some 45 year old guy sweating behind his mother's computer? Bleghhh.

[*mzkandi*]

Ok, I'm closing this. Yes, the whole typing issue was covered and people still want to bring it up.

Topic Closed.