nice guys, read Options

[xoxoxx]

This is a GREAT article:

Death of a Nice Guy
By: Azrael

Women are always saying how they want a nice guy…someone who will open up to them, spend time with them, do nice things for them, in general, be there for them.

Bullshit.

Next time I hear that from a woman, I will say exactly that. Bullshit. Because you don't want the nice guys. Sure, you can say you do all you want, and maybe you can trick yourself into believing it too. But the truth is - you want the jerks. You want the guys who show an interest in you, then back off for no apparent reason. You want the guys who don't call you for two weeks, and when they do they swear up and down they're committed to you. You want the ones who don't talk to you, don't open up at all (and you want to change them to boot!) If you do find a nice guy, you make sure he's unattainable. He has a girlfriend, or he's gay, or he doesn't want a relationship at all. Basically, you want what you can't have.

You know how I know this? I used to be a nice guy. Yeah, I'm the one you always come running to when the jerks screw you over. I listen to your problems, I offer advice. Like all nice guys before me, and the countless ones after, I'm always there to back you up. I tell you how pretty you are. I tell you how fun it is to spend time with you, how cool you are, how you deserve great things. You say thanks, briefly, and then continue to rant about Jerk #2873.

I tell you over and over that you deserve a better guy, and there's always that "but…". Then you call me up at 1 in the morning some night just to tell me how he finally called you after two weeks, and how happy it's made you. You make excuses for why he's been ignoring you. You make more plans to change him. "If." And, do you know what the worst part is? This is the guy you're attracted to. This is the guy you're willing to get physical with. This is the guy you're willing to lose your virginity to. You make a big deal about how you're not a slut, and you won't just kiss any guy. But you admit that you would go all the way with this guy. Or you want to. Or, you already have.

No, you don't want a nice guy. And don't give me that bullshit about "a good man is hard to find." There are millions of them out there. Probably hundreds around where you live. And I'm willing to bet you know a few. You know that guy you call at any hour at night to talk about your relationship triumphs/problems? The one who always compliments you, makes you feel better about yourself? Is always willing to drop whatever he's doing to satisfy your needs?

What about him? No, of course not him. He's not enough of a jerk for you.

And the worst part? You don't want him now…but you will. When you get older, oh, say 30, and the ticking of your biological clock gets louder and louder, and you realize you can't play these bullshit games anymore, you stop going for the jerks and find the closest nice guy you can find. Wait, I take that back, the absolute worst part is that we let you do it. We've been starved for your attention since puberty, and now we're all too happy to get it. We're nice guys too, so we accept you when you come around, instead of giving you the cold shoulder in return you've been giving us for 15 years.

I used to be a nice guy. f**k that. I took the phone calls, I dished out the compliments, I listened, I gave so much advice, shit, I should have a doctorate in psychology conferred to me right this instant. I used to be a nice guy, and I figured that I didn't need to actively look for a girl - that if I just got to know people, some girl would get to know me and really like me and develop an interest in me. I thought that I would make for an ideal partner, I'd open up with you, and be there as much or as little as you wanted me to.

I used to be a nice guy. What did that get me? 21 years of my right hand and softcore porn on Showtime. So, f**k it. f**k it entirely. I'm not going to try to meet women and get to know them, and to hell with the phone calls at one in the morning. Next time you start bitching to me over the fact that he hasn't called in a week, I'm just going to smile at you and say "Ok." In fact, maybe, I'll tell you to call him. Better yet, go over to his house, and drop your pants for him right this moment. Save us all some time. I feel the desire to be that good, dependable, caring friend slipping rapidly away.

And I like that.

[*xcaitlinx*]

that reminds me of my ex-boyfriend...

[Chii]

that reminds me of my ex-boyfriend...

wow me too, in his profile he b*tches about how he's the "nice guy" who's too nice to have a girlfriend.

[sadolakced acid]

errr... how is that by anna?

[aznbabiicutie]

wow lol. seems like he really cant find anyone ;x

[*salcha*]

^ x2 It's not.

Death of a Nice Guy
By: Azrael

[sadolakced acid]

^ figured it was a typo.

[annalucky]

..I've seen this posted before on cb.

Nvm. Something similar.
http://www.createblog.com/forums/index.php...19&hl=NIce+guys

[*salcha*]

^ Yeah, I thought it was a typo also. And I was reading through it thinking, "This is by a guy....."

[sadolakced acid]

nice guys are usually good friends with one girl who they're secretly in love/ obsessed with. and the day a nice guy actually gets his hearttrob he'll realize how bitchy and slutty and all-round bad she is.

[PinkTrash]

Yeah, ditto with the typos confusing..
Thats totally true, because the nice guys seem boring at a young age. Young people want fun. They want excitement. And Jerks give that, while nice guys give the comfort on the con side.

[Teesa]

Mmm..

Moved to Relationships.

[*mipadi*]

Blah blah blah. I get sick of reading this crap on the Internet. Here's what I say to these nice guys: get some spine. You claim girls want assholes--what the f**k? No. No one likes assholes. But people like confidence. Hell, people love confidence. Confidence is the reason assholes get girls. Why? Because there's a teensy-tiny fine line between being confident and being an absolute jerk. You don't have to be mean to attract women. You just have to be happy and comfortable with yourself. If nice guys would just stop whining about how women don't like them, and just be happy with who they are, and actually ask some girl out, then they wouldn't be in the position they're in.

[starlette]

Blah blah blah. I get sick of reading this crap on the Internet. Here's what I say to these nice guys: get some spine. You claim girls want assholes--what the f**k? No. No one likes assholes. But people like confidence. Hell, people love confidence. Confidence is the reason assholes get girls. Why? Because there's a teensy-tiny fine line between being confident and being an absolute jerk. You don't have to be mean to attract women. You just have to be happy and comfortable with yourself. If nice guys would just stop whining about how women don't like them, and just be happy with who they are, and actually ask some girl out, then they wouldn't be in the position they're in.

Yeah thats what I was going to say. Confidence is one serious turn on for me, and its the assholes that have it. But I finally found my nice guy...hes one of the only ones left I think... But he did exactly that. He listened to me talk about every a-hole I dated, but he always knew exactly when I was available and he went for it. Grew some balls and went for it. and thats why we are still together, 2 and a half years later.

[crocodilo]

Next time I hear that from a woman, I will say exactly that. Bullshit. Because you don't want the nice guys. Sure, you can say you do all you want, and maybe you can trick yourself into believing it too. But the truth is - you want the jerks. You want the guys who show an interest in you, then back off for no apparent reason. You want the guys who don't call you for two weeks, and when they do they swear up and down they're committed to you. You want the ones who don't talk to you, don't open up at all (and you want to change them to boot!) If you do find a nice guy, you make sure he's unattainable. He has a girlfriend, or he's gay, or he doesn't want a relationship at all. Basically, you want what you can't have.

You know how I know this? I used to be a nice guy. Yeah, I'm the one you always come running to when the jerks screw you over. I listen to your problems, I offer advice. Like all nice guys before me, and the countless ones after, I'm always there to back you up. I tell you how pretty you are. I tell you how fun it is to spend time with you, how cool you are, how you deserve great things. You say thanks, briefly, and then continue to rant about Jerk #2873.

Amen to that
Most girls fail to appreciate good guys
I agree with every word you say

[toodlepops.]

A nice read. WOW.

[ClaudelGFX]

Amen to that
Most girls fail to appreciate good guys
I agree with every word you say

Doh,lol,something like this,the nice guys,even they are cute sexy whateva,if they are poor lol,then its something like (uhm that's how a girl spelled, "Handsome,Sexy,Poor,ouch...yeah its really a nice guy but.."useless"... not my type" , lol,that's the 1st one, that's why most of the times they choose to be with a "Jerk" who has .000.000$. and when they get kicked off,they go back and cry on the "nice guys" shoulder. (lame.doh.)

PS:i see this everyday.

EoD.

[*takingbacksandy*]

Amen to that
Most girls fail to appreciate good guys
I agree with every word you say

i can't help but think some nice guys have motives too. they're not as innocent as they seem.

and some nice guys are just annoying. the ones you could never see yourself dating because they lack something "assholes" lack.. as said earlier, confidence. these type tend to whine a lot, whine more than a girl. they seek attention by using tactics that don't exactly win girl's hearts.. like trying to make girls pity them. nice guys are predictable, assholes aren't.

but props to the nice guys, the good friend that can take girls bitching. always there no matter what.

[*iNyCxShoRT*]

Blah blah blah. I get sick of reading this crap on the Internet. Here's what I say to these nice guys: get some spine. You claim girls want assholes--what the f**k? No. No one likes assholes. But people like confidence. Hell, people love confidence. Confidence is the reason assholes get girls. Why? Because there's a teensy-tiny fine line between being confident and being an absolute jerk. You don't have to be mean to attract women. You just have to be happy and comfortable with yourself. If nice guys would just stop whining about how women don't like them, and just be happy with who they are, and actually ask some girl out, then they wouldn't be in the position they're in.

You said it all, I like guys who are comfortable with themselves. I had a similar experience in 5th grade. I liked this guy but he liked 5 different girls, and I didn't find out that he was a total jerk until the end of the school year.

[jojo_rokz]

well, I cant say I totally agree on that. I mean we do like nice guys too dont we?

[PrettyBrownEyez3]

I see what you mean, but at the same time, it's not all that true. Girls can't help who they fall for and who they don't. You make it sound like girls look for pain. Girls want the nice guys. Girls want the ones who will take care of them. But girls want the ones they love. It's a complex thing, and until you've lived from a girls point of view, you'll never understand. So that's not really true.

[technicolour]

I see what you mean, but at the same time, it's not all that true. Girls can't help who they fall for and who they don't. You make it sound like girls look for pain. Girls want the nice guys. Girls want the ones who will take care of them. But girls want the ones they love. It's a complex thing, and until you've lived from a girls point of view, you'll never understand. So that's not really true.

Wow. You're wrong. Girls can help with who they fall for. I've done it.

Girls dont look for pain. They look for the good but when something good breaks, then comes the pain.

Blah blah blah. I get sick of reading this crap on the Internet. Here's what I say to these nice guys: get some spine. You claim girls want assholes--what the f**k? No. No one likes assholes. But people like confidence. Hell, people love confidence. Confidence is the reason assholes get girls. Why? Because there's a teensy-tiny fine line between being confident and being an absolute jerk. You don't have to be mean to attract women. You just have to be happy and comfortable with yourself. If nice guys would just stop whining about how women don't like them, and just be happy with who they are, and actually ask some girl out, then they wouldn't be in the position they're in.

After reading that, i've come to the conclusion that Cb needs a nodding smilie. Props.

[jennyjenny]

Reading that makes me angry. I mean, he's sitting there writing and complaining about how he's soooooo nice. If he likes the girl, then why not ask her out. Not ALL girls like guys who are jerks. I personally do not. Or maybe it's because the guys that girls run to aren't really NICE at all, but they're being a jerk for being jealous of the jerk-y guy because he actually dated her. The jerks are getting the girls because he's actually doing something about it and not writing and complaining about how he never gets the girl. I mean, if he's so nice then why doesn't he have a girl yet? Because I don't think that girls would really date jerks.

I don't even think that made sense.

[lexaa621]

^ i agree. that article just proves that 'nice guys' complain too much (or at least the ones that don't get girls)

ok. so. you're saying the only guys with girlfriends are self centered jerks?
i agree that girls just want guys with confidence who arent constantly trying to kiss up to them. that article is kind of annoying. i know plenty of "nice guys" with girlfriends. i know its true that most of the "assholes" are more attractive to girls, but thats mainly because they're not boring. i think. if you have trouble with girls just loosen up and tease them more or compliment them less. i dunno. this article isnt gonna change the way girls think about nice guys. they may appreciate them more, but they wont be any more attracted to them.
whatever.
thats just my opinion. hope it made sense.

[ParanoidAndroid]

I'm not that type of girl. I go for the nice guys (unfortunately the nice guys go for the ones who don't want them). So it's kinda like the same. Nice guys want the girls they can't have and nice girls want the nice guys who like girls they can't have. I'm sure you're pissed off about that. Well, same here. I mean nice guys aren't the only ones getting abused, I kissed my guy friend's ass (not literally) and kept comforting him and stuff. However he's all over for this slut bag. And it is true. We can't have what we want and once we do have what we want we're never satisfied.

Believe it or not nice guys are actually given credit to, but those people are the people you usually ignore. So there's a lot of hypocricy going on here. But that only happens to SOME nice guys.

I also agree with a few people above me. LOOSE UP! If you're being a nice guy and don't get credit... don't complain. There are other people around the world who do the right thing but don't get any credit whatsoever and they don't give a f***. Continue being a nice guy. Don't give up yet.

[*mipadi*]

Reading that makes me angry. I mean, he's sitting there writing and complaining about how he's soooooo nice. If he likes the girl, then why not ask her out. Not ALL girls like guys who are jerks. I personally do not. Or maybe it's because the guys that girls run to aren't really NICE at all, but they're being a jerk for being jealous of the jerk-y guy because he actually dated her. The jerks are getting the girls because he's actually doing something about it and not writing and complaining about how he never gets the girl. I mean, if he's so nice then why doesn't he have a girl yet? Because I don't think that girls would really date jerks.

I don't even think that made sense.

It definitely made sense and it's definitely absolutely correct!

[ClaudelGFX]

sorry about my this expression, but for sure,if you dont have the "balls" to ask,just spit-out the words,and you wait for the girl to make the 1st step,you will die alone for sure :-)

btw:gurls sometimes,likes this kind of guy,kinda crazy,doing crazy things :P
if you dont have something to show,nothing to make her interested,hellyeah she will go with that "jerks" and not with the "nice guys",cuz if she will be with the "jerks" she will have lots of fun,but with you ? Mr "Silence is the most wonderfull....oh yeah,lets do something, LIKE ? "lets be nice" :P doh!
and that "relationship" wont last too much,cuz one of you will get bored very soon :/

PS:Make her feel like she's your "Woman" the one and only,every second of your Relationship and she will not have any reason to be Jelous,because like we all might know,that's the 1st Obsession of all Woman's.

//edit

I am currently interested in one of these "nice guys"... so I'm sorry but the theory has been proved wrong.

Nope, nor even 1 person is the same,everyone has his own preferences.
ex.
someone like's the Hands
someone like's the Eyes
someone like's the Lips
someone like's the Boobies
etc.

And there is no Theory, Its just the way you live your life.
IMO

[redpeony]

I am currently interested in one of these "nice guys"... so I'm sorry but the theory has been proven wrong.

[CrazayChristian]

Actually this is true. All of it, but the problem remains that it doesn't say WHY this situation happens.

I've had personal experiance. I must have read like 20 of these things trying to figure out why it was so wrong to put a girl up on a pedestal. The real reason?

Well besides the fact that most of these guys will not have "the balls to ask her out", they send of every signal that dooms them.

1. Sure they help out with thier problems, but they do it way to freakin much.

2. Sure they'll always be there, which is why they aren't a challenge, it makes them boring and the point is to make the women feel good. Boring...no.

3. You can love her as much as you want, but all it will get you is affection MAYBE and maybe 1.0x10^-1094895716146087% of the time, attraction.

I'd go into details, but blah.

[ParanoidAndroid]

yeah that's true ^. But seriously (to the complaining nice guys), stop complaining about not getting the girl. Don't stereo type girls like that. If you really like that girl then it's best that you stop thinking of being selfish and care for the other's feelings no matter how stupid they are. the more you complain about not getting any love back the more they'll distance from you. A girl wants to be free. I want to be free. I don't want to be caught up in some guy's hands just because he goes one-sided over his feelings for me.

[whooooshy]

wow. that really was a good read. i find it horrible how there are so many nice guys that turn out like that. i must look out more for these nice guys, or at least just realize those that are there.

[elaboratedream]

Some nice guys get girlfriends and stuff... I'm going out with one of those nice guys.

but it's true, girls do like the jerks sometimes. Girls like the nice guys, but they also like the guys that'll get them in trouble, the ones that will hurt them, the ones that will break their heart, the dangerous ones...

[sadolakced acid]

most nice guys don't want to ruin thier friendship with the girl, so they don't ask her out because they believe they don't have a snowball's chance in hell.

[PyroRei]

i can't help but think some nice guys have motives too. they're not as innocent as they seem.

and some nice guys are just annoying. the ones you could never see yourself dating because they lack something "assholes" lack.. as said earlier, confidence. these type tend to whine a lot, whine more than a girl. they seek attention by using tactics that don't exactly win girl's hearts.. like trying to make girls pity them. nice guys are predictable, assholes aren't.

but props to the nice guys, the good friend that can take girls bitching. always there no matter what.

I agree w/ u!!


But some gurls do like nice guys, but the guys r to scared of rejection so they won't ask the gurl our. even though the girl will most likely say yes!

[xoxoxx]

so are you saying jerks and assholes are the guys who asks girls out?

[*mipadi*]

so are you saying jerks and assholes are the guys who asks girls out?

Not exactly. Guys with confidence ask girls out; however, there's a very fine line between confidence and arrogance.

[darkmark111]

Jesus he's bitter. Not that he doesn't have reason to be, in that situation. But still, not all guys that girls go out with are bad. For example:

You know that guy you call at any hour at night to talk about your relationship triumphs/problems? The one who always compliments you, makes you feel better about yourself? Is always willing to drop whatever he's doing to satisfy your needs?

*points to the quote* that perfectly describes my boyfriend. He's the sweetest, most caring guy I've ever met, and he'd do anything for me. So there, you can't generalize completely, can you?

And also I think eventually everyone has to go through a bad relationship. We're young right? It happens. It's life experience. That doesn't mean you can brand girls for life with the label of bad taste in guys.