Relationship advice needed GF problems!, my GF is too controlling/needey! Options

[shrikeuk]

I love my gf i really do but she's driving me crazy ! weve been in a relation ship for 3 months now and she likes to tell me what to do all the time. The worst part is she does it slyly buy saying you make the decisions im just happy to be with you, but i know her too well and she gets all moodey if i make a bad choice. Also she now has decided that she should decide when we meet up and stuff ( basicly all the time!) and i was ok with this but its begining to tarnish the love i feel for her!
Last time i tried to confront her about this she was kinda dismissive and kinda changed the subject by 'sexual relations'. To be honest i cant really fight with her and when ever i try she distracts me! I feel like im under all this pressure to make the right decissions and see her all the time ( as she gets moody when i dont).
what can i do ?

I love her, but if she carries on the way she does im gonna have to end it!

now im not saying that im a greatest boy friend or that i may get nervous some times but for example this is an email i got a week ago after i didnt see her for 4 days ( i was visiting some m8's who go uni!)

*************************************************************
hey hun could you please TURN YOUR BLOODY PHONE ON

it's hard enough not being able to see you, but i really want to talk to you about some stuff

i don't want to be a demanding girlfriend, but this isn't really gonna work if you are uncontactable

you're let off this once because this is your first relationship and you've got lots of work to do

but still i'm starting to feel rather neglected

i just wanted to talk to you about being close around your friends, and paying me enough attention? i realise you may be a little embrassed, but you're gonna have to get over it, because i don't mind being intemate with you infront of people :P the attention thing, well yeah i'm gonna want at least equal attention as your mates get :P

i've been really good so far not harassing you or anything, and i better be rewarded for it
:P

things change when you're in a relationship ok? i just wanna talk to you, is that so much to ask?

all my love

Verity
**************************************************

just to put this in perspective i have seen her for at least 4 days a week for the past 3 months - she stayed over here for the last 2 weeks and i did have my phone on i just couldent reply ( out of credit!)

[*iNyCxShoRT*]

By bossy, do you mean like she sets up the plans without asking if you're busy or not. 'cause then that would be a problem you two would have to talk about. She probably wants to be with you and spend every waking minute with you o_o Maybe its because you don't usually make the plans or have nothing to do so she decided that she could help out. But if she's making all these plans and not asking if your busy or not. Then theres the problem.

[shrikeuk]

hit the nail on the head! - i tell her im buzy or need like some space to sort out my life ( like work and so on) but then she gets lonley when im not with her! - I try and plan stuff but unfortunatley as im still at sixithform money's tight and any way all the money i earn goes on her!

[lKVNiiKINKYl]

It sounds like she's turning you into her perfect boyfriend. Don't be him. Kick her ass =)...or so to speak...
Tell her and just confront her. Don't turn what you say into an arguement. Turn it into a statement.

[shrikeuk]

i agree with what you all are saying its just how to do it without her changing the subject or her getting upset and also how do i stop her being so needey i mean she wasent like this at the start of the relationship.

But as time goes by she seems to be wanting to be with me and when she is with me she likes to be in control!

Also i would like to stand up to her some times but shes not like a guy who will just shrug it off, she is a girl with a very sensative side and to be honest i really dont think like a showdown will do it!

If there is any thing i have learnt its that being tactfull is the key, its just how to do it?

any ways i just wanna thank you all for your advice, its good being able to talk about stuff like this.

[silver-rain]

You know, I used to be like that, but then my boyfriend talked to me about it and you can say I learned the error of my ways. But I think you should just tell her that you don't want to fight over something like that, but you think that you would like some freedom or something.

[technicolour]

COMMUNICATION my friends.

Have you considered talking to her about this? It sounds like it can sure as hell get annoying after awhile, and if you really love her then..you should talk to her.'

A Duel isn't needed. Just a good sit down and talk.

[pinayprincess]

COMMUNICATION my friends.

Have you considered talking to her about this? It sounds like it can sure as hell get annoying after awhile, and if you really love her then..you should talk to her.'

A Duel isn't needed. Just a good sit down and talk.

WORD... i was bout to say that same thing; COMMUNICATION

[CrazayChristian]

Looks to me that if you keep this up, you'll lose her completly.


LAY DOWN THE EFING LINE MAN!

She's sending you away with your tail between your legs. You can either:

1.Live with it, you have a girlfriend that controls you and is spoiled.

2.Lay down the Line and Risk losing a controling girlfriend or making her into a good girlfriend you'll have.


Your choice.


(Oh and Communication man, that's a major key)

[sheepy]

i think she is the most bossy girlfriend i ever heard of. hello, you REALLY need to get her to see your point of view. she seems hella insecure, and covering it up like this.

[elaboratedream]

talk to her. If she still keeps acting like that after you talk to her calmly, be more forceful. Tell her that if she doesn't stop, you're gonna have to break up with her. If she's that controlling, she's not worth it.