fear --, a writing piece. |
  |
 Jun 17 2005, 12:40 PM
Post
#1
|
|
 hi, my name is brianna! =]  Group: Official Member Posts: 5,764 Joined: Jun 2004 Member No: 22,114  |
Silence and darkness surrounded me as I panicked with fright -- it wasn't the fear of dark, really, it was the fear of not knowing, not knowing what secrets and mysteries laid beneath the dark. I could hear damp footsteps comign towards me, nearer and nearer .. I shivered with fright and my blood froze as I felt another's dead cold hand start to inch closer behind me. For the first time in my life, I felt this... indescribable feeling, like the feeling you get when you've lost a loved one, mixed in with terror. I could sense someone's presence behind my back, but I was too terrified to turn around. I stayed as still as I could, breathing through my mouth, trying to make the least possible sound. My heart throbbed faster than ever in my life. A tear ran down my cheek as I stood there motionless, hoping the mysterious presence behind me would go away -- but it's didn't. Suddenly, I felt a sharp pain run through my back. I collasped onto the ground, bending over, blood pouring out of my mouth onto the graffittied ground. Painful thoughts replayed like a film in my head..
That's all I wrote. >< I guess there's too much 'emphasize' in this one, haha, but I wrote this a long time ago out of boredom.. |
|
|
|
|
Jun 17 2005, 12:43 PM
Post
#2
|
|
 *lurks around* Group: Member Posts: 624 Joined: May 2004 Member No: 15,932 |
Wow..it's really dark. I like the imagery. Nice work.
|
|
|
|
|
Jun 19 2005, 05:27 PM
Post
#3
|
|
|
hi, my name is brianna! =] Group: Official Member Posts: 5,764 Joined: Jun 2004 Member No: 22,114 |
Thanks!
|
|
|
|
|
Jun 19 2005, 05:31 PM
Post
#4
|
|
 Hyotei Gakuen Tennis Buchou Group: Member Posts: 40 Joined: Jun 2004 Member No: 26,046 |
Good!!!! (^____^) I want to read more!!!! Yay!!!
|
|
|
|
|
Jun 20 2005, 11:28 PM
Post
#5
|
|
 jellyfishing, jellyfishing Group: Member Posts: 1,174 Joined: Oct 2004 Member No: 55,185 |
WOAH I LOVE THE SUSPENSE!! The end is really creepy, but cool! It'd make a cool story =D
|
|
|
|
|
Jun 21 2005, 11:01 PM
Post
#6
|
|
 What a hypocrite. Group: Member Posts: 2,754 Joined: Apr 2005 Member No: 128,150 |
Yes, this seems like a really good beginning to a story so far.
 Please continue!
|
|
|
|
|
1 User(s) are reading this topic (1 Guests and 0 Anonymous Users)
0 Members: