I'm gay how should I come out?, I really need advice |
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 Apr 23 2005, 07:29 PM
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#1
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 Be yourself. Unless you suck  Group: Member Posts: 135 Joined: Apr 2005 Member No: 129,315  |
I'm gay. I've completly accepted myself over the past few months but I haven't come out to friends because I just don't know what the best way to do it would be. I would love some advice on this.
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Apr 23 2005, 07:40 PM
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#2
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 <3 Group: Member Posts: 3,657 Joined: Nov 2004 Member No: 64,493 |
just tell them, or break it to them slowly. if they're true friends, they'll understand
good luck 
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Apr 23 2005, 07:48 PM
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#3
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 HAAAAAAAA. Group: Member Posts: 4,472 Joined: Dec 2004 Member No: 75,068 |
If they're your friends, they should understand. Just tell them. Hopefully, they won't flip out.
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Apr 23 2005, 07:52 PM
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#4
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 none of it seems real Group: Member Posts: 2,469 Joined: Dec 2004 Member No: 73,889 |
QUOTE(_sarcastic_ @ Apr 23 2005, 8:40 PM) just tell them, or break it to them slowly. if they're true friends, they'll understand good luck  I agree. Some people might not know how to react to it, so be ready for that. I personally think it would be harder to come out during highschool because most are not very accepting in that age group.. but since you said you have completely accepted yourself then I'm sure you won't have a problem. Good Luck and please report back to let us know how it went. |
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| *jooleeah* |
Apr 23 2005, 07:55 PM
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#5
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Guest |
Try not to be so sudden on them. But if they're real and true friends, they should be understanding about it.
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Apr 23 2005, 08:12 PM
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#6
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 ...and this is me.. Group: Member Posts: 3,518 Joined: Oct 2004 Member No: 57,899 |
Tell them....be natural and just don't stress....your friends will understand...
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Apr 23 2005, 08:13 PM
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#7
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 whaaaaaaat? Group: Member Posts: 2,293 Joined: May 2004 Member No: 16,660 |
break it to them slowly. cause some people get freaked out by it cause they're weird.
just be like, "hey guys..over the past few months, i've come to realize that i'm homosexual." or whatever. iono how to say it. just don't go up to one of ur guy friends and go, "i'm gay. *grabs ass* so how's about it buddy?  "cause...that's..creepy. |
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Apr 23 2005, 08:14 PM
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#8
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 I'll never be who I was again.. Group: Member Posts: 2,886 Joined: Jan 2005 Member No: 77,981 |
like someone said, tell them slowly..or hint at it..if they really r ur friend, they'll accept u for hu u r..good luck!
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Apr 23 2005, 08:18 PM
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#9
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 "Silly me, I thought this was a free country" Group: Human Posts: 1,666 Joined: Nov 2004 Member No: 60,913 |
I think the best way to come out ... especially to your parents or just to anyone, is a letter... this way you can really think about what you wanna tell them, and you don't even have to be there when they read it... but please remember that not everyone is gonna accept you being gay, so don't expect everything to go well... the first person I came out to was a gay guy... so yea that made it a little easer. I wish you luck with whatever you decide to do, trust me, coming out is NOT an easy thing to do....
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Apr 23 2005, 09:08 PM
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#10
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 You can't keep running from what you're trying to find. Group: Official Member Posts: 5,030 Joined: Oct 2004 Member No: 54,096 |
QUOTE(dahding @ Apr 23 2005, 5:13 PM) just don't go up to one of ur guy friends and go, "i'm gay. *grabs ass* so how's about it buddy? "cause...that's..creepy. LOL  umm i think you should just have a talk with them... sit them down or something. they should understand
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Apr 24 2005, 01:54 AM
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#11
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Be yourself. Unless you suck Group: Member Posts: 135 Joined: Apr 2005 Member No: 129,315 |
Thank you all so much. The advice is really appreciated.
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Apr 24 2005, 03:56 AM
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#12
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 Apr 24 '05* 1000 posts! Group: Member Posts: 1,184 Joined: Oct 2004 Member No: 56,049 |
if yooh are completely sure, confident and brave, then go ahead. but it not.. then.. i'd b well, if i was, i'd b kinda embarrass. n i dont think i'd tell my friends. then again, my point of view.
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Apr 24 2005, 11:45 AM
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#13
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 Blasian, Asian, INVASION! Group: Official Member Posts: 4,288 Joined: May 2004 Member No: 16,769 |
If they dont accept u for who u are, then they shouldnt be ur friends in the first place
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Apr 24 2005, 11:49 AM
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#14
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 You can call me Jon Group: Duplicate Posts: 878 Joined: Mar 2004 Member No: 9,806 |
Well, so far, I've let them know that there is something that I need to tell them. Let it kill them for a few days, let them wonder what the hell it is. Then you tell them. Straight out.
It's fun. And it gets rid of your problems. Optimism, kids. Optimism. |
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Apr 24 2005, 01:29 PM
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#15
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 i've never wanted anything rationale. Group: Staff Alumni Posts: 8,449 Joined: May 2004 Member No: 19,045 |
QUOTE(xXYouMeBedNowXx @ Apr 24 2005, 9:49 AM) Then you tell them. Straight out. I don't know if you intended to have a pun there or not but still i chuckled a little.  And you should just tell them. Try not to make a huge ass deal, if they are some good real friends, they will except you and love you all the same. Hell, maybe they will even say "I was wondering when you were going to come out." |
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Apr 24 2005, 01:35 PM
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#16
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"Silly me, I thought this was a free country" Group: Human Posts: 1,666 Joined: Nov 2004 Member No: 60,913 |
QUOTE(xXYouMeBedNowXx @ Apr 24 2005, 11:49 AM) Well, so far, I've let them know that there is something that I need to tell them. Let it kill them for a few days, let them wonder what the hell it is. Then you tell them. Straight out. It's fun. And it gets rid of your problems. Optimism, kids. Optimism. yea, keep optimistic... but don't be dissapointed if things don't go the way you planned... |
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Apr 24 2005, 06:11 PM
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#17
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 Class of 2005!!! Group: Member Posts: 1,132 Joined: Jan 2005 Member No: 93,080 |
Yeah. LIke everyone else said. If your friends really are your friends, and if they are worth your time, they will accept you for who you are..
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Apr 24 2005, 06:23 PM
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#18
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 Member Group: Member Posts: 19 Joined: Apr 2005 Member No: 129,516 |
I think first come out to your close friends. If they are truely your friends, they will learn to accept you.
When coming out to your parents..try maybe sceduling a day with them somewhere, like hang out. Then later on sit down and tell them that you are gay. If they love you, they will accept you. But it may take time. Because most parents want like a perfect child. but is who you are, and you gotta be yourself Good luck |
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Apr 24 2005, 08:24 PM
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#19
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 Bay Area YadadaDiiiig. Group: Official Member Posts: 4,249 Joined: Feb 2005 Member No: 103,202 |
^ yeah tell your close friends first, the one you absolutely know will have no problem with it. then after you know who really has your back tell the other friends, and if theyre weirded out by it or anything then f**k them. you dont need them in your life, no matter how good of a friend you thought they were. and for your parents, i know sometimes parents get really mad and stuff but maybe your parents will be different and still of course love you and accept you for who youve already accepted you are.
by the way YOUR HEKKA COOL. i think gay people are thee most uberly cool people ever. |
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Apr 24 2005, 08:28 PM
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#20
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 The Secret Hacker. Group: Member Posts: 1,780 Joined: May 2004 Member No: 18,712 |
QUOTE(dahding @ Apr 23 2005, 5:13 PM) just don't go up to one of ur guy friends and go, "i'm gay. *grabs ass* so how's about it buddy? "cause...that's..creepy. that happened to me before. this guy, i can't even tell if he was gay or not cuz one minute he is gay and the next he is straight. kept touching me and everybody. |
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Apr 24 2005, 08:33 PM
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#21
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 I <3 profanity Group: Member Posts: 2,910 Joined: Feb 2004 Member No: 3,774 |
Just tell them. It worked for me. If they're really good friends, they'll surprise you and be great about it.
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Apr 24 2005, 08:48 PM
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#22
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 Grrrrrrr Group: Member Posts: 801 Joined: Apr 2005 Member No: 123,696 |
yeah just come out slowly. If they are your friends they should understand. Come out slowly their reactions might not be what you expect but they should come around
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Apr 24 2005, 09:10 PM
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#23
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whaaaaaaat? Group: Member Posts: 2,293 Joined: May 2004 Member No: 16,660 |
QUOTE(azn_r4pf4n @ Apr 24 2005, 8:28 PM) that happened to me before. this guy, i can't even tell if he was gay or not cuz one minute he is gay and the next he is straight. kept touching me and everybody. ....that's some scary shyt. run forest run. |
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| *mishyerr* |
Apr 24 2005, 09:29 PM
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#24
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Guest |
Just open up. It might be a great way to test the strength of the relationships between your friends <3 I'm glad you're open about it. ;] I'm half.
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Apr 25 2005, 05:16 AM
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#25
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 Senior Member Group: Member Posts: 109 Joined: Apr 2005 Member No: 129,739 |
last year one of my friends told me he was bi and i was ok with it. i think you should tell your friends, but tell your closest ones first and let them get used to the idea and then when you feel they are ready tell your other friends. as much as we hope that everyone will accept it some will not so be prepared and be brave. they didnt become friends with you because of your sexuality why should it change now? i wish you luck
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Apr 25 2005, 08:02 AM
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#26
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 former member Group: Member Posts: 706 Joined: Apr 2005 Member No: 122,339 |
if they are your friends they should understand.....just dont take their understanding as a sign or anything and make a move on them unless they are gay as well....
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Apr 25 2005, 01:22 PM
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#27
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 Senior Member Group: Official Designer Posts: 4,591 Joined: Dec 2004 Member No: 77,305 |
Slowly make your way on telling them. Theres will be a time. Don't worry. Good Luck, 'cause not everyone is nice enough to accept you for who you are.
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Apr 25 2005, 01:56 PM
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#28
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i've never wanted anything rationale. Group: Staff Alumni Posts: 8,449 Joined: May 2004 Member No: 19,045 |
Yay for everyone giving the SAME exact advice =)
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Apr 25 2005, 02:04 PM
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#29
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 _ Group: Member Posts: 520 Joined: Feb 2005 Member No: 107,274 |
Oh man I'd so have fun with that if it was me. Study one of the Queer Eye for a Straight Guy boys. Preferably Carson. Mimic the outfit. Cute slacks, nice shirt, sweater over the shoulders. Walk into the room and flip your hair. Scream, "Omg! I am FABuLOUS!"
*cough* On a more serious note you should seriously talk about it with your friends. Yes.  *cough*FABuLOUS! |
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Apr 25 2005, 02:19 PM
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#30
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 *~*Yo IcY FrEsH AzN!!*~* Group: Member Posts: 167 Joined: Apr 2005 Member No: 127,747 |
well does it even matter if they know ur gay or not..i would say if u actually liked one of them or somethin u could tell it to them and they would know but other than that i dun c y they need to know ur sex preference..
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Apr 25 2005, 02:56 PM
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#31
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Senior Member Group: Member Posts: 81 Joined: Apr 2005 Member No: 130,449 |
Don't say anything unless they ask. Heterosexuals don't go everywhere and tell people that they are heterosexual. Then why should homosexuals do that? It's just a private thing...Only an opinion.
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| *iNyCxShoRT* |
Apr 28 2005, 09:27 PM
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#32
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Guest |
tell them its better off than letting them find out later.
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Apr 28 2005, 11:00 PM
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#33
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 ticktock. Group: Member Posts: 1,138 Joined: Mar 2005 Member No: 118,235 |
keep it in. maybe talk about it to a close friend. preferably a girl, they'll understand better than a guy. not being sexist, just. .telling a close guy friend that you're gay. .its. .errrm.
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Apr 29 2005, 09:02 AM
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#34
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 Senior Member Group: Member Posts: 95 Joined: Apr 2005 Member No: 132,007 |
first, find some other friends who you can trust that are gay
you can get some decent advice from them and if they can actually be there for moral support if things go bad after you let it be known oh, and *tips glass* for bob marley i bet you smoke pot too so *tips another glass* and best of luck |
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Apr 29 2005, 09:18 AM
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#35
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Senior Member Group: Member Posts: 57 Joined: Jan 2005 Member No: 82,407 |
if they are truly your friends, they'll accept who you are.
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