Human Hatred, ...just a poem... |
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 Apr 23 2005, 05:47 PM
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#1
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 Newbie  Group: Member Posts: 4 Joined: Apr 2005 Member No: 129,581  |
Human Hatred
Grind my heart ...the silly thing... Puree the parts ...this uneeded thing... Make it blend ...the useless thing... So it'll never mend ...this broken thing... My hearts not needed ...the dead thing... This hates superseded ...this unholy thing... All for you ..the whole thing... A feeling so new ...this deadly thing... Hatred fuels me ...the unending thing... It's set me free ...this blasphemous thing... |
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Apr 23 2005, 05:53 PM
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#2
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 Quand j'étais jeune... Group: Staff Alumni Posts: 6,826 Joined: Jan 2004 Member No: 1,272 |
Beautiful.
Though, I'm not sure if the title "human hatred" really fits. Do you mind sharing why you named it as such? |
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Apr 23 2005, 05:57 PM
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#3
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 Senior Member Group: Posts: 8,274 Joined: Mar 2004 Member No: 8,001 |
It doesnt sound like " human hated " it sound be something about " love " or " emotion", i think. Your poem is good but short.
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Apr 23 2005, 06:05 PM
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#4
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Newbie Group: Member Posts: 4 Joined: Apr 2005 Member No: 129,581 |
I named it such because that's what I was feeling when writting it... no other reason than that. Though it was because I was only angry, because a friend betrayed a deep trust.
Ho hum... I jst slapped on a title. |
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Apr 23 2005, 06:38 PM
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#5
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Quand j'étais jeune... Group: Staff Alumni Posts: 6,826 Joined: Jan 2004 Member No: 1,272 |
^ah, it makes sense.
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Apr 23 2005, 06:49 PM
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#6
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Newbie Group: Member Posts: 4 Joined: Apr 2005 Member No: 129,581 |
Thank you... though it could be named better.. I like it as is. ^w^
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