"do you like me?", why you can't just say that Options

[expoised]

everytime i'm stressing out over whether a guy likes me or not, guys always tell me to just go ask him "do you like me?"
and when i'm like "NO!"
they're like "what's the worse that can happen?"
and i'm like "HE'LL SAY NO!!!"

and to tell you the truth, i'd rather spend the rest of the week or month infatuated with this certain guy and playing out whether he likes me or not in my head, rather than hear from him flat out "no". even though he might say yes... if there's a chance that he'd say "no", i wouldn't take it.

and anyways... that's not the worse that can happen!! if he says "no", i'd be embarrassed to death that i asked and i'd probably turn all red and try to brush it off, and in doing so, make myself seem like a complete idiot. it'll probably make me lose all self confidence.

so yeah... why you (or anyone who can relate) CAN'T just go up to a guy and ask him whether he likes you or not.

[Just_Dream]

I can relate.. or well used to lol. I used to be shy and I would never flat out tell a guy.. I would either do it in a letter (after liking them for a few months) or not even tell them at all ahah. People tell me to tell the guy.. I also fear rejection. I guess I'm not willing to accept that they most likely DON'T like me. Usually the guys that I liked in the past never really shared the same feelings as I did. But that was then...

[-SuN-KiSSeD-]

i know!! i've been there..and it's such an effort to tell people that it's so much more harder than it seems...but i've been through it..and now i have the sweetest bf ever, and i guess it's knowing when it's WORTH taking the risk...basically if he's worth risking your reputation for him..either that or ask a friend to ask!

[dancingkait]

i know it doesnt sound like a big deal to just go up to the guy you like and ask him but i know im way to shy to! lol i dont wanna be told flat out no either but also how would you start that conversation? "hey by the way do you like me?" lol

[FoOd]

I have the exact same problem like you.

Its all about confidence and overcoming your fear of rejection. I mean, if you keep on liking this person, then you'll just keep on giving youself more hope until it grows too big. As they say, "the bigger they are, the harder they fall" And with a rejection its going to shatter your world.

[*stephinika*]

^^
hmm i agree. i've never asked a guy if they've liked me but i've told guys i liked them...my confidence level has gone up quite a bit because before i did tell a guy the first time, i never saw myself doing that.

[topsyturvy]

i agree with all of you!! i just can't accept the fact that so many people are telling me to ask him straight out.. but in our school you just don't do that.. ARGH i admire all of you out there that have done this.

[misoshiru]

i agree. i've tried it before...and the guy got scared of me. ahahha.

[EmmalieV]

I so agree with you I would neveeerrr tell a guy I like him.

[X-Zeifer]

my sister said that to a guy he did like her but she did it when they were in a group so he got embarassed and said no, my advice dont ask.

[kikyoudefender]

Just ask. You're mostly afraid that your crush will say no. If he says, "sorry, I'm busy," or something along those lines, you can ask later, but if he just says plain "NO!" then just leave the jerk. He's not worth it.

my shift key isn't working...

[heyyfrankie]

yeah, i can relate. if i like a girl, i would also like to just think about her and try to decide if she likes me back because if i ask her and she says no, than i can't think her anymore because there is no use. and if i find out that she does like me, than it will be akward when we are around each other because we both know that we both like each other! it gets confusing!

[xbr0kensmil3]

i'm having the same problem. i can't just go up to the guy i like and ask him if he likes me cuz if he says no he would prolly tell his friends and i'd be embarassed. but then again i'm so curious to find out.

[liSerS x3]

i couldn't go up to guy and ask him if he likes me. i try to figure out another way.

and if you go up to him and ask, he'll pretty much figure out that you like him. and if he doesn't like you, when you see him anytime afterwards, it could be kinda awkward.

[eboarder2020]

I agree that going up to a person and asking "do you like me" as a hard thing to do... Its one of those maybe im better off not knowing even though there is that chance they like me... But if you think about it, if both of you like each other, and neither one of your says anything, you both are missing out on what the relationship CAN offer

[angelrevelation]

YES!!! there's this guy i think who likes me, but at the same time i'm really doubtful, so i cannot.... just CANNOT ask!! never been able to anyway... *sigh* i hate being shy sometimes

[(>")>]

Yea ive been there too...

its like when you gain confidence, a invisable person punches you rit in da guts...then you just...give up..

but if you think you see...REALLY REALLY clear signs that the person likes you..go up and ask...thats what i gotta say..

[LittleLulu]

hah u know u can be
single n liking sm1
single n not liking sm1
or with sm1

my fav right now is single n likeing sm1..cuz ..its so fun! u get to daydream abt him n all that
im in that situation right now. ..n well this time.. for the first time..i actually reli reli want him to know that i like him... even though i think its pretty darn obviouse that i like him.... well.. yea my friend is gona tell him todai n im heeeelllllaa nervouse!

im not sure that he likes me or n e thing...but yea... we've been having a good friendship lately...but.....yea...if he doesn't like me,,,, that might all end/

[cHuNsAbAbIe012]

all i can say is...just get ur face out of the gutter n ask him! i mean...wen i liked guys i just told them straight out...either that or all my friends told him! lol! but its really not that embarrasing to tell a guy that u like them. its just a crush so you'll get over him. there are so many other guys that u can get infatuated by. trust me it isnt a big deal. maybe its because im nineteen n i never started telling guys that i like them till i was sixteen but its nothing really. i mean u'll feel let down but u get over it.

[xj_liana_tx]

my stupid friend told the guy that i like him and he ignored me...
if i didn't tell him, i could've at least had some hope

[Trolling]

Its the same with girls... But its kinda worst... Even if you do ask, they don't give you a straight answer... Like for example this year... I told this girl I liked her... I got this reply "Aww how cute..." Then found out from my other freinds that it was because I was too scrawny -.-

[laur3nw]

I wouldn't tell a guy for the same reasons as you. I think I rather find out that he likes me first.

[B1onde_1ns1de]

and to tell you the truth, i'd rather spend the rest of the week or month infatuated with this certain guy and playing out whether he likes me or not in my head, rather than hear from him flat out "no". even though he might say yes... if there's a chance that he'd say "no", i wouldn't take it.

thats exactly how i feel everyone always goes why dont u just ask him and blah blah blah but id rather just wonder then actually know if he doesnt...

[Mireh]

And thats why you use the middle school technique:

"Hiya, my friend's friend's sister's babysitter's brother's ex girlfriend's cousin wanted to know if you liked ____. So do you?"

[lovescream]

I can't.. because well, basically your reason is mine. I'd get so embarassed if he says no. First, now he and other people will know I like him, and he rejected me.

[LittleLulu]

yesterday .......yea he found out from my friend.
n i confermed it online
n his answer wasn't clear....its still 50/50 hhahaha it was weird
but we're still friends, even after this long ass akward conversation XD
but yea...........................i guess it COULD have been worse.

[aznhunnie6o1]

I can tell a guy I like him just like that. I'd rather have him know that he likes me and maybe if he liked me back, he'd be able to ask me to be his girlfriend rather than having him might like me and not tell him and let him slowly loose hope of ever going out with me.

What I did with my current boyfriend was we made each other guess who we liked and we gave each other clues.

[pink_tootsie]

i can totally relate right now, cause im kinda 'infatuated' with this guys for the past month or so and i just fear that he'll say no and reject me like a loser, you know?...what a shame it is but im just too shy for it right know..lol

[nevernothere]

I don't know. There's these 2 chicks that everyone says likes me, but I haven't the guts to even ask them if it's true. *looks embarrassed*

[StarlitxFrosT]

actually I did just that. lol
i was straight forward. He admitted to liken me so it worked out fine.

[mistaken_identit...]

Yeah, it's real hard. But when your emotions get real strong I guess you'll tell the guy that you like him. Well, I did. I felt like if I didn't then I wouldn't have a chance cause he might just be feeling the same way as I have.

It wasn't great though, I asked him who he liked and he was like 'nobody'. There were a couple of awkward moments after that but it sort of got the same (like before) after a couple days. It's screwing me up......I still don't know the truth and I'd LOVE to have the courage to go up to him and ask him straight away.

[annxmakoolet]

a lot of my guy friends actually like it when a girl goes up to them & tell them that she likes em. hahah but then again, maybe my guy friends are just weird

but yep, this situation is very hard.

[y0urelectrikk]

haha your the same as me.. I think its more fun to wonder if the guy likes you, than asking him. Thats kinda what i did w/ my current bf. I liked him for 2 years and never asked him out, but he finally asked me

[sheddingtears]

yeah, if it was that simple enough for me to go up to the guy i like and ask him. i don't know, sometimes i just feel like i'm not good enough, but then sometimes, i end up finding that i overestimated them.

... but then sometimes you'll never know if you don't ask the question, meaning that all that time you thought about him was just a waste of time.

& that's happened all my life so far.

[kikyoudefender]

It's good for girls to ask the guys out. It's nothing wrong with it, but most girls are afraid their crush will say no.