Am I out of line? Options

[x3chrissyx3]

I have been with my now, fiance for 3 years, we love each other dearly, but we were talking yesterday and what came out of his mouth truly upset me. We were talking about him getting turned on...and then he goes "I mean, guys get turned on at least 4 times a day" By a pretty girl or whatever. But then he was like "It's not like I walk around with a hard-on all day" Then he goes yeah, I'll see a pretty girl and be like "She's pretty. Cool" and that's it. But...I mean, I'm a girl, and I know we're different than guys, but it honestly hurts me so much when he says stuff like that, knowing that EVERYDAY he's turned on by someone else, and I don't give another guy a second glance. I got really frustrated, and to be honest, I'm EXTREMELY pissed, I just feel offended, ya know? This to me, is complicated. I'm not really a jealous person, but I feel like there are things that should and shouldn't happen, and I don't think he SHOULD be turned on by another girl...or other girls for that matter. I'm really upset, and it changed the way I look at him because I always thought he was..."better" than that. Am I out of line for feeling this way? Do you think it's normal? What would you do?

Thanks...

[xj_liana_tx]

you can't help it, guys are truly like that, but it doesn't mean he wants to marry THEM, you are the one he's engaged too and he knows you the best, and he loves enough to want to marry you.
don't worry.

[cocoalightning27]

Yes, guys can't help it...your never gonna find a guy who doesn't get turned on by a woman other than his wife......It's not like he's having an affair....

[nevernothere]

But...I mean, I'm a girl, and I know we're different than guys, but it honestly hurts me so much when he says stuff like that, knowing that EVERYDAY he's turned on by someone else, and I don't give another guy a second glance. I got really frustrated, and to be honest, I'm EXTREMELY pissed, I just feel offended, ya know? This to  me, is complicated. I'm not really a jealous person, but I feel like there are things that should and shouldn't happen, and I don't think he SHOULD be turned on by another girl...or other girls for that matter. I'm really upset, and it changed the way I look at him because I always thought he was..."better" than that. Am I out of line for feeling this way? Do you think it's normal? What would you do?

*sighs*... Chrissy... He's not cheating on you, is he? If not, it really doesn't matter. I get turned on by so many different girls every day. Guys simply can't help themselves. The best they can do is stay loyal. It's very normal... and your expectations are sort of unrealistic.

[FoOd]

Well, sorry to say this, but most guys think with their small head rather than the head on their shoulders.

Don't worry about it. Unless girls suddenly call his house asking for him, then you should start worrying

[Mistrunner]

Like everyone else said, he can't help it. Just remember that he's with you, not them, and that you probably turn him on the most.

[silver-rain]

Yeah, I kinda know how you're feeling. I can get like that too sometimes with my boyfriend. But, like everyone else has said, he probably can't help it. And, you're the one he's with, so obviously you're the one he cares about the most, and gets turned on the most when he's with you.

[xXirockhardXx]

Hmmm the good thing is that his not cheating on you. But yeah i would get mad if my bf or fiance told me that.

[yeseulx3]

he's a guy.
guys have to be guys.

[shortiiex]

he a typical man...he get turned on my other girls, but he loves YOU..that is all you need

[sheepy]

yeah; what everyone else says.
just because others turn him on, its okay becus he LOVES you!!

[_confuzed_]

i'm sure he doesn't mean bad. all guys look at other girls, it's almost a law of nature. just be glad he looks at you the most and probably gets turned on by you more than anybody else ;]

[toodlepops.]

guys are like that. he might think the other girls are hot but you're gonna get married to him.

congratulations, by the way.

[cube4080]

Yes, you're a little out of line. He's telling you the truth. If he said otherwise he'd probably be lying and trying to cover something up.

[Boyfriendless]

I know what you mean, my friends BF, keeps talking to me and other girls in a...inerested way. Kinda annoying

[_sarcastic_]

^ i agree with cube4080
it's better for him to tell you the truth then him lying about it. he's like any typical guy, he can't help it if he thinks that way when he sees a hot guy. and i'm sure you probably also did that once or twice when you saw a hot guy.

[eunie03]

How are you fiance's with that level of trust...... that's a problem that arises in a... 6 month relationship. Tops.

Girls aren't too innocent either.. like we've never drooled over Brad Pitt's abs, or Tom Cruise's smile.

Oh, you know. The next time he does that... you should just talk about guys all the time. See how he likes it

[Boyfriendless]

How are you fiance's with that level of trust...... that's a problem that arises in a... 6 month relationship. Tops.

Girls aren't too innocent either.. like we've never drooled over Brad Pitt's abs, or Tom Cruise's smile.

Oh, you know. The next time he does that... you should just talk about guys all the time. See how he likes it

ew, I dont drool over them...whos tom cruise?

[eunie03]

ew, I dont drool over them...whos tom cruise?

As it is hard to pick up on sarcasm online... I'll assume you were joking (Damn, there is no emoticon for what I am feeling....)

[Boyfriendless]

As it is hard to pick up on sarcasm online... I'll assume you were joking (Damn, there is no emoticon for what I am feeling....)

avtialy, Im not, I dont know who tom cruise is, and Brad Pitt, well...he scares me

[eunie03]

Oh... I guess he's old school. Damn, I feel old when my sister doesn't know who I'm talking about.



Brad Pitt was beautiful before his Troy/Jennifer Aniston days.

But I'm bringing this way off topic. My bad, my bad.

[kyuubi319]

Oh, I absolutely adore Tom Cruise.. he's so yummy.. and gorgeous and.. yeah. off topic.

okay, well, he's just a guy, he can't help it. The difference between guys and girls are that guys get turned on by anything with legs, but girls are a bit more picky about who we choose to drool over. That's all. Just keep this in mind, he loves you, not all the girls that walk by on the sidewalk (:

[misoshiru]

well...he is a guy. but you should talk to him about it and how you felt.

[Shattered_Hope]

I don't think you're out of line. You love this guy...and if he gets turned on by someone different each and everday you're right to get p*ssed. But I also think that he's wrong to tell you these things because he should know that in one way or another it hurts you.

[jenknee]

honesty is beautiful. but i think he inappropriately shared that information and you should really seek him out and tell him that he hurt you. im sure he'll understand and apologize.

[HoodieObsessed]

I have absolutly no experience with this but I jsut wanted to give my opinion:

I think that you shouldn't get too worried or anything, it's true all guys are different, but they do all carry traits that are the same...he can't help getting turned on y other girls...it's not like he's goign out with them or sometihng, if he's getting engaged to you he must really love you...I don'tt hink him getting turned on by other girls means he loves you any less, he jsut can't help it...when I was lil, like not that little, around 10 or something I thought my bros were bove having girlfreinds (kinda a weid thought now I think about it..I mean having a girlfreind isn't low, lol, but ya, I was young,give me a break) so anyway, I was really surprised when he told me he liked this girl...I practically went I cried...I'm like "what is the world coming to?" but ya, I got over it...it's sjut one of those things, humans can't help some things, thye jsut come...but I bet your fiance is probably turned on by you more than any other girl

[x shootingstar x]

as everyone said, he's a guy.. and guys can't help it..
you should really have a deep talk about that to him... maybe he can help it? i don't know..

to answer your question, i don't think you're out of line..
i know what you mean.. if he's YOUR man, he shouldn't be looking at other girls.. that's just annoying.. and it seem at least somewhat unloyal. BUT, if you think about it another way, you can also be touch by another guy's smile. maybe YOU don't.. but i was just trying to give an example.. but you are DEFINITLY NOT out of line.

There was once a quote i've heard. "it's the hormones that make the gentlemen JERKS!"

hmm well.. i'm just rambling because i'm thinking myself..

how about this.. think it THIS way..

if YOUR GUY watches porn.. no matter how much.. [everyday, twice a week, once a month, or whatever] doesn't he get turn on? yes he does. and when he watches porn, he's looking at rated R girls.. (i wonder if this is pg13) but yes, that is annoying..

i was and sometimes still am annoyed by this truth.

but you are NOT out of line and you should have a DEEP TALK ABOUT ALL THIS WITH HIM!! trust me, it's for the better. he'll feel better knowing how you feel and you'll feel better knowing that he knows..


i hope i helped!