A blonde was hanging by her stomach..., A blonde joke, blonde activists stay out |
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 Feb 12 2005, 10:19 PM
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#1
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 My name's Katt. Nice to meet you!  Group: Member Posts: 3,826 Joined: Jan 2005 Member No: 93,674  |
NOTE: If you are against blonde jokes, I'll apologize ahead of time. We're just doing this for good wholesome fun. I don't mean to offend anyone. Don't ruin the fun, maybe laugh along. Here are a few blonde jokes.
A blonde was hanging by her stomach and man walks by and asks, "What are you doing?" The blonde replies, "I'm trying to hang myself." "Well, if you want to hang yourself, tie the rope around your neck," he suggested. "No, I tried that and I couldn't breathe." A blonde went to a ventriliquism show. The ventriliquist was making the puppet tell blonde jokes. The blonde was offended so she went up to the man and said, "Stop telling blonde jokes! It's mean and unfair!" So the man said, "Oh, I'm sorry." The blonde looked confused and shook her head, "Oh not you, I was talking to your friend." Q: What did the blonde say when she opened a box of Cheerios? A: Donut seeds! Normal jokes: There was a man visiting his girlfriend's parents. After dinner, he had so much gas, but didn't want to fart because he would make a bad impression. He decided to help clean the dishes to impress them. Their dog was right behind him. He came up with an idea: I'll just fart and blame it on the dog. So he farted. "Butch!" He farted again. "Butch!" He thought it was going well so he farted everything out. "BUTCH! GET OUT OF THE WAY BEFORE THAT MAN POOPS ON YOU!" Q: How many country singers does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: 5. 1 to screw in the lightbulb and 4 to sing about how much they missed the last one. Lawyer joke: There was one priest, one farmer, and one lawyer. Their car broke down in the middle of the road, but they were close enough to walk to the farmer's house to spend the night. There were 2 rooms in the house and only 1 person could be in each room. One person had to sleep in the barn with the animals. "I'll go. After all, I'm used to the animals on the farm," said the farmer. So the lawyer and the priest slept in the rooms inside. An hour later, the farmer came back to the house and complained that there was a cow that wouldn't stop mooing and he couldn't go to sleep. The priest decided to switch place, "After all, they are all God's creatures and we must live in harmony with them." So off he went and the farmer and the lawyer slept in the house. An hour later, the priest came back to the house and told them, "The cow must've been in great pain and I couldn't bear to see or hear it suffering." So the lawyer decided it was his turn to go the barn. So off he went. An hour later, there was the cow. Well, that's it. I have a lot more, but these were just the jokes that were on my mind. |
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Feb 12 2005, 10:22 PM
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#2
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 Senior Member Group: Member Posts: 5,585 Joined: Aug 2004 Member No: 38,082 |
The first two are funny. Lol
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Feb 12 2005, 10:26 PM
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#3
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 I'm just a little bit crazy... Group: Member Posts: 1,119 Joined: Jun 2004 Member No: 19,760 |
i like the 1st 4.
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Feb 12 2005, 11:55 PM
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#4
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 --WhY dOnTcHa Do SoMeThIn'? Group: Member Posts: 109 Joined: Oct 2004 Member No: 55,944 |
Haha, I like the first ones a lot better... but they're all pretty good!
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Feb 13 2005, 06:36 AM
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#5
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 Senior Member Group: Member Posts: 575 Joined: Jan 2005 Member No: 92,400 |
i only like the first one.. the rest were okay. =)
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Feb 13 2005, 09:33 AM
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#6
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Senior Member Group: Member Posts: 452 Joined: Feb 2005 Member No: 97,814 |
lols, i liked the donut seeds ones. hehe... donut seeds...
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Mar 15 2005, 08:34 PM
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#7
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 Too slow. Group: Member Posts: 2,730 Joined: Mar 2005 Member No: 108,320 |
haha i like the 5th one
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Mar 15 2005, 09:14 PM
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#8
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 whatever d00de Group: Member Posts: 1,349 Joined: Nov 2004 Member No: 63,060 |
wow gotta love the blonde jokes
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Mar 15 2005, 09:28 PM
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#9
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 Senior Member Group: Official Member Posts: 4,882 Joined: Sep 2004 Member No: 47,064 |
haha i didn't get the last one... there was a cow? gah, i feel stupid.
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Mar 15 2005, 10:07 PM
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#10
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 Senior Member Group: Member Posts: 913 Joined: Feb 2005 Member No: 101,212 |
QUOTE(XKali_chik_4_lifeX @ Mar 15 2005, 7:28 PM) haha i didn't get the last one... there was a cow? gah, i feel stupid.  You're not the only one 
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Mar 17 2005, 05:39 PM
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#11
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 潮州人 forever =) Group: Member Posts: 668 Joined: Jul 2004 Member No: 29,877 |
lmao the donut seed one was amusing. =D
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Mar 17 2005, 08:34 PM
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#12
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 Take advantage of me. Group: Member Posts: 912 Joined: Aug 2004 Member No: 43,792 |
Haha, I liked the Butch one lol..
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Mar 17 2005, 10:38 PM
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#13
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Senior Member Group: Member Posts: 2,087 Joined: Aug 2004 Member No: 36,491 |
QUOTE Lawyer joke: There was one priest, one farmer, and one lawyer. Their car broke down in the middle of the road, but they were close enough to walk to the farmer's house to spend the night. There were 2 rooms in the house and only 1 person could be in each room. One person had to sleep in the barn with the animals. "I'll go. After all, I'm used to the animals on the farm," said the farmer. So the lawyer and the priest slept in the rooms inside. An hour later, the farmer came back to the house and complained that there was a cow that wouldn't stop mooing and he couldn't go to sleep. The priest decided to switch place, "After all, they are all God's creatures and we must live in harmony with them." So off he went and the farmer and the lawyer slept in the house. An hour later, the priest came back to the house and told them, "The cow must've been in great pain and I couldn't bear to see or hear it suffering." So the lawyer decided it was his turn to go the barn. So off he went. An hour later, there was the cow. i dont get it... someone pm me haha. i know jokes arent funny if you explain it, but i DONT UNDERSTAND IT |
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| *chaneun* |
Mar 19 2005, 06:31 PM
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#14
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Guest |
i dont get the last one
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Mar 20 2005, 01:15 AM
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#15
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 Mr. Brightside Group: Member Posts: 332 Joined: Mar 2005 Member No: 114,646 |
hahaha they're all funny.
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Mar 20 2005, 01:19 AM
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#16
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 Word. Group: Member Posts: 3,004 Joined: Jul 2004 Member No: 34,673 |
some of those are classics... lol.
ah, there great |
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Mar 20 2005, 01:20 AM
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#17
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 deleted Group: Member Posts: 3,168 Joined: Jan 2005 Member No: 92,276 |
those were funny
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Mar 20 2005, 01:33 AM
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#18
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 highfive. Group: Member Posts: 1,301 Joined: Jul 2004 Member No: 32,951 |
haha those are funny; but what does the last one mean?
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Mar 20 2005, 03:57 AM
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#19
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t-t-t-toyaaa Group: Official Member Posts: 19,821 Joined: Apr 2004 Member No: 11,270 |
hahahahah the first one is the best
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Mar 20 2005, 03:48 PM
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#20
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gRaCiE Group: Member Posts: 350 Joined: Feb 2005 Member No: 96,997 |
lol! i like the first ones the best
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Mar 21 2005, 05:11 AM
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#21
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 Member Group: Member Posts: 13 Joined: Mar 2005 Member No: 115,746 |
haha! all are funny! but i d0nt get that "cow" part..geez..
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Mar 21 2005, 07:21 AM
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#22
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 because i'm worth it Group: Member Posts: 990 Joined: Jun 2004 Member No: 24,643 |
i like all of it except the last one. i didn`t get it.
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Mar 21 2005, 08:55 AM
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#23
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 yan lin♥ Group: Staff Alumni Posts: 14,129 Joined: Apr 2004 Member No: 13,627 |
i dont get the last one
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Mar 21 2005, 04:33 PM
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#24
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 unify and defeat... divide and crumble Group: Member Posts: 2,759 Joined: Mar 2004 Member No: 6,379 |
I def. don't understand the last one
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Mar 21 2005, 04:54 PM
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#25
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 can't believe I let people call me Lynne on here 5 yrs ago o Group: Member Posts: 243 Joined: Oct 2004 Member No: 54,591 |
erm...
i think the lawyer sent the cow there so it wouldnt bother him.... |
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Mar 21 2005, 09:16 PM
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#26
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 Senior Member Group: Member Posts: 1,220 Joined: Jan 2005 Member No: 81,808 |
QUOTE A blonde was hanging by her stomach and man walks by and asks, "What are you doing?" The blonde replies, "I'm trying to hang myself." "Well, if you want to hang yourself, tie the rope around your neck," he suggested. "No, I tried that and I couldn't breathe." lmao thaz funny |
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Mar 23 2005, 04:30 AM
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#27
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 Syaoran...kawaii... Group: Member Posts: 19 Joined: Mar 2005 Member No: 113,627 |
Everything was funni...juz didn't get the last one...hmmm *thinks deeply*... ...
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Mar 23 2005, 07:23 AM
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#28
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 Ť¤gďé#02¤ťŠ Group: Member Posts: 294 Joined: Mar 2005 Member No: 110,871 |
lolz..i like the last one...ocnsidering i'm a law student myself haha...:)
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Mar 23 2005, 11:23 PM
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#29
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Senior Member Group: Member Posts: 136 Joined: Mar 2004 Member No: 9,910 |
i dont' get the lasst
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Mar 24 2005, 12:01 AM
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#30
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 who ma bitch? you ma bitch, bitch. Group: Member Posts: 1,920 Joined: Oct 2004 Member No: 55,278 |
lol funny. but i didnt get the last one
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| *salcha* |
Mar 24 2005, 12:07 AM
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#31
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Guest |
QUOTE(lawmaniac_98 @ Mar 23 2005, 7:23 AM) lolz..i like the last one...ocnsidering i'm a law student myself haha...:) care to explain? heh. i cracked up at the donut seed one. hahah. |
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Mar 24 2005, 12:10 AM
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#32
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 skaters gonna skate. Group: Official Member Posts: 6,861 Joined: Mar 2004 Member No: 6,336 |
haha.. like everyone else.. thought all of them were funny except the last one..
didn't get it either. |
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Mar 24 2005, 06:34 AM
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#33
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Ť¤gďé#02¤ťŠ Group: Member Posts: 294 Joined: Mar 2005 Member No: 110,871 |
QUOTE(wonders79 @ Mar 24 2005, 2:07 PM) care to explain? heh. i cracked up at the donut seed one. hahah. Well, my guess is...u know how lawyers can get yea? they get so annoying or how people thing of lawyers yea...and since everyone kept coming back becuz of some other reason..the cow came back cuz of the lawyer prolly cuz the cow couldn't stand the lawyer...lolz Well that's what i think...hehe.. there could be another point about the last joke...any lawyers/lawyers to be out therE? 
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Apr 6 2005, 09:55 PM
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#34
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 Senior Member Group: Member Posts: 183 Joined: Apr 2005 Member No: 121,503 |
I MADE UP THE DOUGHNUT SEEDS!
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Apr 7 2005, 06:39 PM
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#35
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 Residential Crazy Child Group: Member Posts: 934 Joined: Mar 2005 Member No: 116,897 |
lmao-funny jokes
but i still don't get the last one |
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| *iNyCxShoRT* |
Apr 29 2005, 01:45 PM
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#36
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Guest |
LOL the first two were good, i don`t get the lawyer joke tho.
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Apr 29 2005, 02:00 PM
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#37
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 Senior Member Group: Member Posts: 2,881 Joined: Apr 2005 Member No: 132,134 |
the only one i actually got was the one with the donut
LOLSS it was funny |
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Apr 29 2005, 02:06 PM
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#38
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 Disgrace to the asian race Group: Member Posts: 346 Joined: Apr 2005 Member No: 132,080 |
rofl. That's funny.
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Apr 29 2005, 02:14 PM
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#39
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 Senior Member Group: Member Posts: 2,746 Joined: May 2004 Member No: 17,125 |
QUOTE(lawmaniac_98 @ Mar 24 2005, 6:34 AM) Well, my guess is...u know how lawyers can get yea? they get so annoying or how people thing of lawyers yea...and since everyone kept coming back becuz of some other reason..the cow came back cuz of the lawyer prolly cuz the cow couldn't stand the lawyer...lolz Well that's what i think...hehe.. there could be another point about the last joke...any lawyers/lawyers to be out therE? I think thats what he meant, but by the ending, you can't tell. "The cow was there". I loved the other ones though. |
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Apr 29 2005, 02:54 PM
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#40
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gRaCiE Group: Member Posts: 350 Joined: Feb 2005 Member No: 96,997 |
this is pretty old..i think i read it bfore...
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May 12 2005, 09:50 PM
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#41
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My name's Katt. Nice to meet you! Group: Member Posts: 3,826 Joined: Jan 2005 Member No: 93,674 |
QUOTE(lawmaniac_98 @ Mar 24 2005, 5:34 AM) Well, my guess is...u know how lawyers can get yea? they get so annoying or how people thing of lawyers yea...and since everyone kept coming back becuz of some other reason..the cow came back cuz of the lawyer prolly cuz the cow couldn't stand the lawyer...lolz Well that's what i think...hehe.. there could be another point about the last joke...any lawyers/lawyers to be out therE? Yes. Everyone was complaining about the cow and came to the house. But the cow was complaining about the lawyer and came to the house. |
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May 12 2005, 09:58 PM
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#42
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 Senior Member Group: Member Posts: 323 Joined: Mar 2005 Member No: 116,565 |
i like all of them! i'm a blonde too...and i understand the last one.
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May 13 2005, 10:37 AM
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#43
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 im addicted to my car<3 Group: Member Posts: 635 Joined: Jan 2005 Member No: 92,236 |
those are good. i finally get the last one lol
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May 27 2005, 07:14 PM
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#44
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 Senior Member Group: Member Posts: 121 Joined: May 2005 Member No: 134,309 |
funny...took me forever to get the last one...
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| *mona lisa* |
May 28 2005, 10:18 PM
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#45
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Guest |
The first few are nice. I've heard the last one but it had a different ending.
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Jul 15 2005, 11:05 PM
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#46
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 GREEENROCKS Group: Member Posts: 1,393 Joined: Apr 2004 Member No: 10,624 |
i liked the blonde jokes..
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| *mipadi* |
Jul 16 2005, 02:57 PM
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#47
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QUOTE(goofipinay @ Mar 21 2005, 5:54 PM) erm... i think the lawyer sent the cow there so it wouldnt bother him.... No. The cow was annoyed by the lawyer, just like everyone else was annoyed by the cow, so they went back to the house. 
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Jul 16 2005, 10:07 PM
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#48
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 Queen of Random Information Group: Member Posts: 825 Joined: Jun 2005 Member No: 157,057 |
For the last joke.. the cow got annoyed by the lawyer. Hope everyone gets it now..
Anyways, I've heard all of those. 
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Jul 17 2005, 02:15 AM
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#49
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 Newbie Group: Member Posts: 5 Joined: Jul 2005 Member No: 172,522 |
haha! the first one was funny! no offense to all the ppl who don't like blonde jokes or are blonde. but the rest were funny 2!
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Jul 17 2005, 12:11 PM
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#50
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 The Noob Group: Member Posts: 575 Joined: Jul 2005 Member No: 169,647 |
haha dese are funny
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Jul 17 2005, 05:28 PM
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#51
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 My desperate heart is far too weak to run for you this long. Group: Member Posts: 640 Joined: Jun 2005 Member No: 150,342 |
haha!!!! i love em all but i dont get the last that much...
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Jul 17 2005, 05:35 PM
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#52
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 i <3 peter Group: Member Posts: 350 Joined: Jun 2005 Member No: 147,825 |
I liked the 2nd one! >D
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| *mipadi* |
Jul 18 2005, 10:11 AM
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#53
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QUOTE(Bobblehead425 @ Jul 17 2005, 6:28 PM) haha!!!! i love em all but i dont get the last that much... A handy explanation |
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Dec 1 2005, 04:34 AM
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#54
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because i'm worth it Group: Member Posts: 990 Joined: Jun 2004 Member No: 24,643 |
someone explain the last one?
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| *mipadi* |
Dec 3 2005, 10:31 AM
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#55
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Guest |
QUOTE(mipadi @ Jul 18 2005, 10:11 AM)
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