Like A Rose In Concrete, ....a poem |
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 Sep 6 2004, 09:38 AM
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#1
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Member  Group: Member Posts: 23 Joined: Sep 2004 Member No: 46,291  |
this is a poem called "like a rose in concrete" i wrote. i don't know if its finished but here is what i have. give me you input after you read it plz. some parts are a little cheesy but its what came to mind.
like a rose in concrete your beautiful to me when i see you now i want to fall to my knees i just can't help but to let you be like a rose in concrete your beautiful to me like a rose in concrete you stand tall and strong when i see you walking the walls around my heart fall then my heart runs with no one to call like a rose in concrete you stan strong and tall like a rose in concrete youre unique in a way you are the lighthouse that guides my way one little seagull one big bay like a rose in concrete your unique in a way |
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Sep 6 2004, 10:39 AM
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#2
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 and they say imitation is flattering Group: Member Posts: 1,337 Joined: Jul 2004 Member No: 27,269 |
A rose in concrete... interesting.
Very nice poem. |
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Sep 6 2004, 05:11 PM
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#3
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 The voices talk too much... -.-u Group: Member Posts: 2,099 Joined: Aug 2004 Member No: 39,078 |
S-T-A-N-D
Sorry.... But you spelled it wrong. Overall, I like it. |
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Sep 6 2004, 05:18 PM
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#4
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 Pimp Status Group: Member Posts: 640 Joined: Jan 2004 Member No: 1,200 |
Awesome job... I really like it... I really think that the poem could be one of those "never ending" ones where you can always add on to it... great job
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Sep 6 2004, 11:23 PM
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#5
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 Senior Member Group: Member Posts: 1,384 Joined: Aug 2004 Member No: 37,337 |
i think each line needs to be followed more on the beat if u kno wat im sayin..
but overall its pretty good i liked it |
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