it probably really lame, but here you go |
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 Jul 27 2004, 10:19 PM
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#1
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 kristin  Group: Member Posts: 5,705 Joined: Feb 2004 Member No: 3,985  |
Her hair falls against her back
As the little girl falls agaisnt the wall Slouched and crying Voices screaming Tears streaming As a moment of hesitation She wait hoplessly for it to end The bitterness gets colder Every second as she gets older When it was least expected Another yell would shout The little girl slouched Covering her eyes Washing away those days Earrasig the good memories with every new scream. Crying, to take her mind off of it. She slowly reached for the knife Covered with blood From the last night Her hand squeazes it SHaking and trembeling of anger. She blames them for every scar she has As she slowly slashed it against her wrist Finally, something new to cry about She thought Squeezing her fist. Blood gushing out from impact Staining the carpet And mixed with her tears. for the blood stain had been there, piling up For to many years. ----er..i don't right poems much, just when I hit that depression time every few times a year. so you know im not very good at it...and i dont like sharing my poetry either..but there you go. critisize it as much as you want. im ready. |
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Jul 27 2004, 10:23 PM
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#2
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 Senior Member Group: Member Posts: 279 Joined: Jul 2004 Member No: 32,749 |
Wow, depressing. Good..very..emotional
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Jul 28 2004, 03:33 AM
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#3
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 N.CARTER Group: Member Posts: 1,709 Joined: Feb 2004 Member No: 3,742 |
Its sad, and it ain't lame at all. Good job!
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Jul 28 2004, 10:38 AM
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#4
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kristin Group: Member Posts: 5,705 Joined: Feb 2004 Member No: 3,985 |
thanks you guys
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Jul 28 2004, 11:26 AM
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#5
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 Senior Member Group: Member Posts: 405 Joined: May 2004 Member No: 17,232 |
hmmmm. i like. i like.
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Jul 30 2004, 12:03 AM
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#6
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 Senior Member Group: Staff Alumni Posts: 7,025 Joined: Feb 2004 Member No: 4,051 |
i absolutly love it, its paints a beautiful picture.
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Jul 30 2004, 06:49 PM
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#7
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Brie Group: Staff Alumni Posts: 10,172 Joined: Jun 2004 Member No: 20,548 |
Kristin.. that was very good. =-]
That was a great read.. I could see it all happening. Very deep, yet very good. 
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