My "Girlfriend"s Birthday, OK, so she's not REALLY my gf... Options

[jouralto]

OK, there's a lot to this story, and I'm kinda using this as a way to get my shiny new Xanga some attention, but I've got something here I'd like some advice on, and I'm not just gonna wait for some random person to stumble upon my brand new blog and post a comment.

Anyway, for all of the details: Click me! (And thanks for the awesome layout, BTW.)

Summary:
I've got this girl I like a lot a this point, and I want to get her a gift for her birthday. The current planned gift is a pink-tinted mirrored jewelry box and a gold/silver bracelet. I've only got one problem with the gift itself: Is it too emotionally overburdening?

I'm not entirely sure where we are in the relationship. OK, I lie. We're early in the relationship, good friend category for about a month and a half. But I feel like there's something more than that between us. Maybe it's just my growing affection for her, maybe there really IS something there; I'm just not sure yet. And if we're not to the point where moving on in the relationship is acceptable, I don't want to ruin all chances of there being something. And even if a serious relationship doesn't work out, I'd still love to be her friend.

Also, if I do decide to give it to her, I'm not sure how I would best present myself, and the gift, for that matter, to her. Do I just pull it out while she's not looking, or tell her I'm giving her her present first, then pull it out? I'm just not sure.

And so, I leave the thoughts to you while I drift off to a terrible sleep that'll probably last about 4 hours. >_>

[dustbunny]

hmm.. roughly how much did the mirror/jewelry cost you? the thing is, it IS the type of present someone would give in a serious relationship. that's not to say that in friendships jewelry isn't given as gifts, just usually not in fresh friendships. I think you're right in thinking about the emotional burden factor, because IF the girl isn't ready for all that yet, she may be a bit alienated and feel awkward in accepting such a gift.

I think you could give a gift that shows your care without the gift being too symbolic of anything else. (I hope that makes sense).


OOOOOOR you could take this situation in a completely different direction by using the gift and her birthday as a way of..bringing up the idea of a relationship--but I'm not sure how confident you are of that whole situation as of now.


so, to play it safe, I suggest switchin up the gift with something light-hearted. maybe you could make something or put together several things that are specific to your friendship, aka inside jokes, that will get the idea across that you care about her (on a very relaxed, friendship level). thus, you'll still be able to pursue her when the time is..right I suppose, without having had already scared her off.

[CocaineNoseJob]

Don't sweat it. It aint no thing. She'll prob like it.

[jouralto]

Yeah, the whole gift just seemed a bit over the top after I took a minute to look a what I was getting. I like the idea of the inside joke; it'd create something only the two of us would understand, which would strengthen the relationship, while not being completely over-the-top serious. And since we don't have any just yet, this might be a good way of starting one. XD Maybe like a home-made birthday card or something. I could do that...

And just because you asked, the box/bracelet combo runs for about $60, but since we've only REALLY been good friends for arund 2 months now, it's probably a little strong.

And did I mention this is my first real relationship? Yeah. That might be important. That's what makes just giving it to her so difficult. I don't wanna fall into this so strongly that if it doesn't work out, I'll be devestated, but I still care about her... And I don't want to hurt her either. It just... it feels like it may be too soon to think about a completely serious relationship just yet.

Well, I still have about a week and a half to think about it, so maybe I'll come up with something spectacular by then. Keep the suggestions coming, though.