loved me. now doesnt.. Options

[tengopescador]

ok so when my boyfriend and i went out for like a month and a half, we fell in love. Well i know i did. On our 3 months, he told me that he doesnt think he loves me anymore and he just needs more time. Its almost our 4 months and i dont know what to do. we talked last night about it briefly cuz ill get upset and he said he doesnt think its the right time. I love him with my whole heart. I want him to. I even tried new stuff to get him to like me more, which i know i shouldnt have done but i thought i had to. Can someone please give me advice on like what to say to him, or do you think he wont come around and love me again..

[CocaineNoseJob]

Ahh! Ok, so have you ever thought that u dont actually love him, but maybe that you like the idea that your in love with him? Maybe your really comfortable with the idea of having a boyfriend you'd do anything for that security? idk then again maybe you are. but girl if he straight up told you that he wasnt feelin u nemore, whats the point? u cant make someone love u. its a waste of time and energy. Its a sad story but people do grow apart, you just gotta learn to move on and be a better person out of it.

[karmakiller]

It's a good thing that he's being honest with you about how he feels and isn't just going along with things to make you happy. I know that it probably hurts to let him go, but it's better after only 4 months than waiting years to make the split. Maybe he just doesn't fall in love as fast as you... maybe you should two should give it some more time. It may just take him longer than it being a fact that he doesn't love you.

It only took you 3 months to say that you love someone. So if you two broke up and you found another guy who's to say that after 3 months with him your current boyfriend will be emotional history.

[tengopescador]

We're still together. I talked to him about it today and he said hes just not a "lovey guy". It's just wierd not saying how i feel.
Ive known him for 3 years, but we "went out" in May.

Thanks for all your advices!!!! They really helped.

[idkilikepoprocks]

You've known him for 3 years and went out for 4 months. Does the 1st part of that sentence supposed to justify how you feel? I can say "This guy sat next to me for 3 years and we've conversed. We've gone out for a month and I know we're in love." That won't justify how I feel. Only the inner workings of the relationship can dictate that. I don't care if you've known him for a day and say you've loved him. I can't tell you you're not in love. I can tell you it's a little bit unrealistic, but who's to say. Things change, people change. You can't do anything. You can't keep clinging as if you're begging for him to love you. Do you think it's worth to put yourself in that kind of emotional spot? And yes you're doing this to yourself! Don't be passive about it though. Do something. Ask for a break if it helps or even go do something fun over the weekend that you guys never do. See if it rekindles the fire. If it doesn't, break ups are inevitable in most relationships. You can't make something work. It just has to work on its own. Good luck.