Is this rejection? Options

[dpl313]

I started talking to this girl through a friend of mine. We went out on a date last week. I had a good time for the most part. Something has me confused...

She has this guy friend she mentioned. She was saying how he buys her and some of her friends gifts. More specifically she was saying how he bought her thoughtful gifts. Like he bought her the coat she had on. He bought her car parts and stuff. Maybe it's just me, but guys don't do stuff like that just because.

So the date itself seemed to go ok. I thought it went well for the most part. She said she had a good time. She gave me her number. I asked her about a 2nd date. She said, "yes, but I don't know when." Because she's a college student. But when she said that I really thought she was blowing me off and I looked at her funny. Then she said, "I'm not blowing you off. Don't take it that way."

I tried calling her but I had no luck. So I emailed her and she replied back. Saying she only got one of my calls and left her charger in her friend's car, and she didn't get it back yet. She told me she didn't have time to go out with me, because she had to catch up on classes. Then she told me she is only comfortable talking to me online. I don't know, because the day after our date she did tell me she was shy. But when I read the part about her comfortability... my pride seriously started hurting.. Plus I've never heard of a girl saying that. I'd swear that's bs.

But I thought let me just suck it up, keep talking to her, and see what happens? We talk online regularly. I thought she didn't enjoy the date, but she really did enjoy it. I'm planning on asking her out to lunch again at the end of the week. However, I can't help but think... she only sees me as a friend.. doesn't she?

[MissHygienic]

Well, assuming that your stories are 100 percent accurate, I can safely say that she's obviously too shy to be straightforward with you. Go ask her what she thinks of you the next time you speak to her online. No bullshit, just the truth, tell her that. Be the one who's straightforward with her and stop trying to beat around the bush to probe her feelings. Let her do the talking, not you.

[tokyo-rose]

You only went on one date. One date does not mean that the girl likes you. She's probably interested in you, but give it more time to open up and get over her shyness with you.

[dpl313]

and how exactly do i succeed in getting her over the shyness?

[LoveToMySilas]

Sometimes its hard to talk face to face. She might just be shy, like she said. Just give it a little time. Be patient. I'm sure the guy who constantly gives her things just has a wee crush on her.

[xCutUpAngelxxx]

I can't really say much more than what's already been said, but, yeah.Just be patient and give her a little time to overcome her shyness.I think when she's ready, she'll tell you now she feels.

[me1issaaaa]

Oh, the "my phone died" story... I hate to say it, but that sounds kind of bad. I've used that on a few different people I didn't want to talk to maybe that's not what she meant by it, and I hope it's not. We wouldn't give out our number if there was no connection, anyway. Like everyone else said, give it more time.

Best of luck.

[YaGurlSukedMe2SL...]

nah she dont like you but you might as well whip your dick out anyway.

[miyashu]

and how exactly do i succeed in getting her over the shyness?

Give her more time (like everyone just said). Keep the online thing going if she prefers to communicate with you that way. With my current boyfriend, I was also more comfortable talking to him online (in the beginning of our relationship). At first, I was too shy to voice my thoughts in person. But the more we talked online and the more dates we had, I didn't feel timid anymore. Maybe it's the same way for this girl.

One thing that could get her to open up, is if you ask her about her interests/goals/etc. Get to know her if you're really interested. Ask her these questions online or in person. Tell her about yourself, too. If she knows more about you, perhaps she'll start feeling more secure.

[absinthe]

Mmm, I think she's just interested, and not really sure how to get over the shyness she feels with you herself.

I'm thinking about she's not really interested in something serious right now, and might be focusing on school more than relationships.

She might be looking for some casual entertainment with a little bit of spice -- so the best thing you can do is assure her that there's no pressure into anything serious.

[jovdub]

I agree with some others, I think you should just ask her what she thought of the date and see if that reveals anything. Give her a little more time and see if she comes around.

At some point though, she has to show more interest then online conversations. I know people get "busy" but we all make time to talk to people were interested in. I would hate having to build a relationship with someone just based off online conversations which a lot of people seem to do these days.

[fameONE]

Don't leave anything to chance, pin the bitch up against the wall with a .45 to her head and get a definite answer. If she isn't going for you and your psychotic behavior. Fire a warning shot in the air and say, "I'm giving you to the count of 3 before I empty the clip."

As she hits the track like Flo-Jo, scream, "just kidding!"

[TheWinterBones]

Psycotic!

Y'know what, I think she's just simply shy. She probably does like you, but perhaps she doesn't want to rush into things. Take it slow, get to know her first. If / when she starts opening up to you, then she will feel alot more comfortable around you and then see where that takes you both.

Don't expect her to get over her shyness within a couple of days / meets because it just aint gonna happen.