Being replaced, sucks Options

[Melissa]

I know I'm being irrational, but here goes.

I have this really close guy friend. We're not best friends, we're just really close. We've got ... this whole vibe; he understands me, I understand him, we have our own "language" and basically, we connect pretty freaking well and I like it that way.

Today he started getting to know this other girl on my floor that I like and have no problem with... until things started to feel like she was trying to replace me. She saw a few pictures of the two of us (him and I) on his phone and suddenly, she wants a picture with him and takes like, ten million pictures of the two of them together on his phone. I know it's petty and immature, but it irked me a little, but then I was like "oh well, whatever." We're all in the floor lounge together and she starts talking to him about how omg, you and I are so ALIKE! you're like me in a guy's body! blah blah blah blah blah f**king blah!!!. Then it's like they keep talking and getting closer and I'm just sitting there staring at the TV and pretending not to be annoyed.

It's not like he has no other female friends and it's not like I even really care if he does or doesn't, it's just that... the two of them are acting exactly how he and I act and suddenly, it's like after two f**king hours, they've got their own little inside jokes and if I want to talk to him, he's too busy talking to her! Our friendship has been six months in the making and she talks to him for a few hours and suddenly, I feel like I'm replaced!

I WANT the two of them to be friends and all, I'm not saying I have a problem with that... it's just that... I feel so expendable. =[

[*yrrnotelekktric*]

do you like him, or do you honestly just see him as just a friend?

[queen]

imo, all friends are expendable.

but to get back on your issue, i think it's just a phase. most likely they'll run outta stuff to talk about, and things will go back the way it used to be between you and him.

...do you think the only reason she started talking to him was 'cause of the way she saw your relationship with him? girls are shady like that ;x. after she gets tired of the attention, they'll probably part ways.

[S-Majere]

imo, all friends are expendable.

LOL, I thought I was the only one in the world with such a harsh outlook on friends. I always seem to replace mine or fall out with them after six months or so. Ha.

Seriously, you seem like this guy a lot and I'm at a loss of what to suggest you do. This whole situation reminds me of one I was in three or four years ago. Didn't end well, jealousy is such a green goddess.

[DoubleJ]

Indeed it is, but I must admit, this is very childish. I swear I think you made this topic or something like it before. Anyway, I think that you should just let it be. There are other people in the world ya know.

[Melissa]

^ Not really, unless you're talking about one of the topics I made in relationships back in 2004 and that time, I was like... 15 and very childish indeed.

But anyways, it's not a big deal anymore, not that it ever was. I left the two of them alone, since she was giving me all these looks that pretty much said "go away, bitch," and he came to find me a little bit later. I'll get over it since it's pretty stupid.

[S-Majere]

He knows you're his better friend. No worries

[stephinika]

^^
Exactly. She's probably doing it for the attention, so it should fade soon. But I know what you mean, that feeling sucks.

[DoubleJ]

True indeed Majere, as a guy, we all know who are the jump offs, and who are the genuine girls. He is probably just going to be with her to get a cheap thrill and that is it.

[B-NOX]

I LEARNED THE PRESENT PERFECT

[miyashu]

I LEARNED THE PRESENT PERFECT

Good for you. Now, learn to stop spamming.

Anyway, in regards to the topic: the spark between the two of them should fade away, especially if she's acting this way just to get attention. Like Sarah said, he knows you're his better friend and I'm sure he values your friendship much more.

[AskAlice]

Girls have a tendency to act that way when they have not realized that things like that don't matter. Her intention is probably just to show off to others, or, she thinks he's cute or something and realizes that the best way to enter a relationship is by being really good friends with someone first. I wouldn't be too worried; I doubt her intentions are to replace you. It's not common for someone to be so malicious purely to gain the friendship of another person (although I do know someone who does that). Her motivations probably lie elsewhere, in a place that doesn't involve you.

[Melissa]

Well, we had an argument over something stupid and now we're not really (which is childish, imo), which sucks more than it should.

And it figures that instead of hanging out with me, he's with her all the time now. A lot of people on my floor seems to have noticed it and keep asking me why they're together so much and it just pisses me off.

Not a happy time right now.

[absinthe]

Maybe he's into her romantically.

[Melissa]

^ I thought that, too, but we actually had a talk yesterday and it turns out that he doesn't and is just too nice to tell her to gtfo.

But we're kinda on the same level of understanding now, so that's happy.

And... I do like him a little bit more than just a friend, but there's no way I'm going to do anything about it because I value his friendship too much.

[fameONE]

Once you come to grips with the truth, it'll make things easier.

You are replaceable. Your presence, your love, your care, your emotional turmoil; can all be replaced in an instant by the other person. There's always going to be one person in any friendship/relationship that cares more than the other. Sometimes you'll find yourself getting the short end of the stick.

[Joss-eh-lime]

whooa this SAME thing happened with me, but the guy is most likely gay.
only difference was at first we were all three friends, then i got pushed aside like yesterdays newspaper.


its sucks. but im slowly getting over it. hopefully your guy friend can be mature enough to be equal friends with both of you!

[Melissa]

Once you come to grips with the truth, it'll make things easier.

You are replaceable. Your presence, your love, your care, your emotional turmoil; can all be replaced in an instant by the other person. There's always going to be one person in any friendship/relationship that cares more than the other. Sometimes you'll find yourself getting the short end of the stick.

That's such a sad way to look at things, but I guess it's true.

But about the situation with my friend... things that shouldn't have happened happened when we both got drunk and now things are in that awkward stage where I'm not sure if I want him as more of a friend or not and he's probably even more confused because I'm avoiding confrontation.