Age DIfference..., I need advice please Options

[shortnsweet88]

I know that there have most likely been topics about this posted but Im dating an older guy and I was wondering what age do you think is too old for an 18 year old girl to date. Im just trying to see what people's opinions are on this.

[*My Cinderella.*]

Honestly, you've reached the age where there is not age too old. I would just say that age doesn't matter. If you prefer an older person, then go for it. There's nothing stopping you...you're legal!

[Comptine]

^somewhat agree. i mean, if you dated anyone within a ten year age difference... it would be fine. but since you're still some what young, i think anything over 30 would cause a lot of awkwardness.

keep in mind that you have to deal with college while your boyfriend would probably have a job/work if he's past 25 years old. unless of course, he's getting his master's or phd or md...etc.

[shortnsweet88]

Well, this is where the problem comes in...he is 35 years old. Crazy, I know. I just really like him so Im having a hard time. I kind of feel like it shouldnt matter, but like you said...it kind of does I guess.

[iDecay]

It all depends on the maturity level, I guess. Who gives an ish if he's way older?

[*Intercourse.*]

Hmm, a 18 year old girl.

I would think around 24-25 years old is old enough, maybe even up to 27. I think their fine. -shrugs- I'm weird when it comes to age though, everyone thinks I pick to old of ages. I've never really cared about age differences though.

[multifaceted]

What does your parents say about you dating a that much older man?

Age is just a number. To me, it doesn't mean anything.

[shortnsweet88]

Well, my parents dont know yet because Im still deciding if I am going to date this guy. My parents probably wont be crazy about it though because they are very protective. Age has never really mattered to me though and I really like this guy. He doesnt act way older and I am very mature for my age, so I just dont feel like its weird.

[Jane Doe.]

Age may be a number but I do think there may be someone 'too old' for an eighteen year old--depending on her maturity level and where they both are in their lives. A man in his thirties may be looking for something completely different than an eighteen-year-old, you know? Hell, people are different, I know, but circumstances, circumstances.. Age shouldn't be the factor but people's situations and state of being can be far from similar the older one goes..
So yeah.

[minioligo]

Age shouldn't be a factor, but to be honest, it really is. Of course, it depends on your maturity level, but what I've always thought is more important than maturity is "understanding". Eh, there are just some things that people your age won't understand that 35 year olds will...and the other way around, as well. I guess that's hard to explain but yeah. Also, it depends on if you're willing to take all the criticism that you get for dating him. Hate to say it, but it will happen. Mm, what it really comes down to is that if you really want to date him/have a relationship with him, it's going to take a ton of effort.

[Comptine]

35 is kinda iffy. people say that age shouldn't be a factor but it definitely is. i mean, sure you can like the person and be in love but there are a lot of obstacles that the couple has to go through.

if you really like him, i say go for it. if you don't, you're going to be wondering , "what if?" for a long time.

i'm just curious. where did you meet him?

[shortnsweet88]

He is a wrestling coach for some of my friends that wrestle. I met him through my best friend who is in love with wrestling. Im getting quite a bit of reasons why I shouldnt do this from yall and some friends here so Im thinking I will probably let this one go. Thank yall for your help.

[*Duchess of Dork*]

Age is just a number. To me, it doesn't mean anything.

So true. I know 35 year old men that are far more immature than some 25 year old men I know.

If it feels right between you both, then don't sweat the age difference. That's not to say that the relationship will be without conflict (not that any relationship is free from conficlt). Things will come up when the age difference is put to the test.

Does he have children? Because that is something you'll want to consider. Are you ready for that?

[priyas]

He's old enough to be your dad.

I agree with robbi+.

[shortnsweet88]

So true. I know 35 year old men that are far more immature than some 25 year old men I know.

If it feels right between you both, then don't sweat the age difference. That's not to say that the relationship will be without conflict (not that any relationship is free from conficlt). Things will come up when the age difference is put to the test.

Does he have children? Because that is something you'll want to consider. Are you ready for that?

Na, he doesnt have children...at first I didnt even know he had been married before so that scared me to death...I made sure there was nothing else I didnt know. I like what you said, it encouraged me a little...thank you.

[pkbabe]

Kinda going through a similar situation myself. Except I'm 19 & the guy just turned 27 so its about a 7-8 yr difference. Alot of times I wanted to end it because he seemed jerky(we would mostly talk online cuz he lives about a hr away & he doesn't like using the phone) but after an hour phone conversation I finally understood why hes been jerky & seemed distant. So yea...it will be difficult so just hang in there

[shortnsweet88]

Aww its nice to know that someone can relate, thank you!

[Mireh]

well whatever you do, just make sure you know what his intentions are.

[pkbabe]

Aww its nice to know that someone can relate, thank you!

You're quite welcome pm me if you ever wanna talk & stuff about stuffies like this

[SweetKisses20418]

Personally, I believe that it depends on the two individuals involved. Your relationship will succeed much more, if you two are on the same page. Sure, opposites attract, but not for everyone. Usually, an older man/woman is the one looking to settle down. Not always, but usually.

If you are interested, remain friends, first. Get to know them. See if you two have anything in common. Communication is up-to-par, etc. Last year, while I was nineteen, I dated a 30-year-old. We had similar beliefs, but other than that, we didn't have much in common.

He was far more immature than many other men or women I have met around his age. So, there is no guarantee how someone will act, based merely on age. But, for 18, in my opinion, anyone over 25 is pushing it. But, feel free to date whomever you like.

[towntown2]

Now that you're an adult, you can date any older guy you want.
I'm a believer that age is just a number [once you're legal]--if the love is there, then it's there.

[AyeVickaye]

Age aint nothin but a Number. As long as you guys got Love it don't matter, really. People tend to overaggerate thats its bad to date somebody older..

[datass]

^wtf. that's too grim.

[mxfemme]

Have any of you seen Hard Candy? Its about an older guy who likes way younger girls, and I know you're "legal" but in that movie, this young girl makes a good point. She says "A girl may imitate a women, but she is still a girl." And I've had conflict with friends who date a way older guy (more then 10 yr diff. when we were in high school) Everyone talks about maturity levels, and how girls mature faster then guys, but an 18 yr old, isn't anywhere close in exp. to of someone in the early-mid 20's.

But my opinion has changed, but not significantly.

Now I am 24, and am with a 37yr old. :O

[sixfive]

It depends what do you like and what type of person he is? Health is more important than anything else so if 19 years guy has not good health then you can not make relationship with him.

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wat

[james9]

It's ok dear because i am also dating older women. There many people in our society who love to have company of older people they will give you positive response.
james anderson

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- Cristy

This post has been edited by jaeminnie: Oct 9 2008, 06:50 PM

Reason for edit: Advertisement removed. - Cristy

[applejaxkz]

Honestly, you've reached the age where there is not age too old. I would just say that age doesn't matter. If you prefer an older person, then go for it. There's nothing stopping you...you're legal!

You're fair game. I'm 21 and I find women between 30-40 extremely attractive, everyone is different. As long as you're not sleeping with a 13yr old I think you're golden.

As a side note, if you are sleeping with a 13yr old. Wear something nice for when you end up on "Dateline NBC's To Catch a Predator."

[boobies27]

Ive had really older boyfriends
When i was 17, one who was 27 and another who was 35
People thinks its creepy and thats understandable i guess

Love knows no age, so it doesnt matter much to me

[y0urelectrikk]

It doesn't freak you out that he's old enough to be your own father?
Obviously it's essentially up to you.. if it feels right then go for it. I would feel so intimidated/inexperienced and awkward dating a 35 year old.

[Castaway]

imagine a 40 year old dating somebody that's 20.

Lets say that 40 year old was a guy. When that guy was 19, his future gf wasn't even born yet! Gross

as for your question... i think the age difference should be within 4 years. (for 18 year olds) 5 is.. acceptable but it starts to cross the line a bit.

but as you get older.. a 25 year old with a 30 year old is np. a 25 year old with a 35 year old is too big of a difference.

[y0urelectrikk]

Lets say that 40 year old was a guy. When that guy was 19, his future gf wasn't even born yet! Gross

Ewwa

[misoshiru]

who the fuck bumped this topic

[Harp]

It all depends on what you're comfortable with.

[forthesakeof]

Depends by the person. I'm twenty and I'm dating a girl who's 18. 2 years.