Long distant. Meeting the special person Options

[maximelids]

I'm just curious if anybody has met thier long-distant partners in real life?

I'm in a long distant relationship with a girl from Bulgaria. We live at different ends of the world. Been a few months we have been 'togethere'. We are both in our teens.

She has invited me to stay a week with her and her family in Bulgaria, I'm really looking forward to it but I only have negative thoughts in my mind at the moment.
What if it is a scam? What if she is not the person she claims to be in the vertual world?
On top of that she lives in the most dangerous part of Bulgaria.
Is it worth risking my life to meet her?

Can anybody with similar relationships adivce me please?

Thank you

[think!IMAGINARIL...]

Well, make sure she's actually REAL first. Call her, webcam, whatever. Just make sure that she is who she says she is.

[*Uronacid*]

Well, me and Holly have met in real life, but she only lives 1000 miles away... *sigh* Holly.. :]

Well anyways, it is a big risk. I hope that you have sent each other lots of pictures, and you know each other as well as you possibly can. Me and Holly have spent weeks at a time at each others houses and we have so much fun. It was a real big risk the first time, but it was totally worth it for me.

Holly lives in the most dangerous part of the south east... and I live in the most dangerous part of the north east!!!!! :o!

[*icecreamisyummy*]

yes... i agree many pictures!! go on your webcam and have her go on hers to make sure shes the real thing. talk on the phone.

i met my online friend on a band trip. well i had seen him before that but thats too long to explain here.

how about you guys send each other letters and stuff, not jsut emails. do her parents and your parents know about this???

[maximelids]

Thanks for the advice people.
Really apriciate it.

Problem is that she does not have a webcam. But we have sent each other loads of photos, and have talked on the phone a few times. We communicate mostly by msn and skype.

However, it's kind of complicated to talk to her on the phone, espicially with different time zones. I stay up until 2a.m in the morning just to talk to her for a few minutes. This relationship has really changed my life, for the worst and best. Worst as in my sleeping pattern is messed up now, and it is kind of effecting my studies. Best as in I really think she is the one ! Tough people think we are kind of 'young' to be togethere, I am in my late teens and she is in her mid teens, we really love each other till the end of the world. We have even talked about marriage, which I hope will come true one day.

Her mother knows, but her dad is kind of over-protective towards her, so they do not 'dare' tell him yet.

My mother does not know yet, but she has given me total freedom since 16, so she won't really comment much on us.

[datass]

I cant help but cringe whenever I see you spell 'together' wrong.

[*Uronacid*]

Thanks for the advice people.
Really apriciate it.

Problem is that she does not have a webcam. But we have sent each other loads of photos, and have talked on the phone a few times. We communicate mostly by msn and skype.

However, it's kind of complicated to talk to her on the phone, espicially with different time zones. I stay up until 2a.m in the morning just to talk to her for a few minutes. This relationship has really changed my life, for the worst and best. Worst as in my sleeping pattern is messed up now, and it is kind of effecting my studies. Best as in I really think she is the one ! Tough people think we are kind of 'young' to be togethere, I am in my late teens and she is in her mid teens, we really love each other till the end of the world. We have even talked about marriage, which I hope will come true one day.

Her mother knows, but her dad is kind of over-protective towards her, so they do not 'dare' tell him yet.

My mother does not know yet, but she has given me total freedom since 16, so she won't really comment much on us.

damn dude... her dad doesn't even know, and you're going to fly down there... OMG, you are f**king crazy.

[AngelinaTaylor]

Awwww I'm Bulgarian :) Where does she live? I can tell you whether it's "dangerous" or not. I know quite a few things.

Depending on where she lives, I can tell you whether it's a good idea or not.

[maximelids]

My first language is not English, I apologise if I make spelling mistakes, 'ice'.

Well they will tell her dad before I fly there.
Tough, he won't welcome me with a hug and pat on the back, he would still have to respect his daughter's choice sooner or later?

I forgot the name of her home town. She told me it was the most dangerous part of Bulgaria. Corruption, drugs, weapons, rape, armed robberies e.t.c...
I think it's 2 to 3 hours from Sofia.
Anyway all countries are dangerous, just have to know where to be at the right time and place.

[*Uronacid*]

My first language is not English, I apologise if I make spelling mistakes, 'ice'.

Well they will tell her dad before I fly there.
Tough, he won't welcome me with a hug and pat on the back, he would still have to respect his daughter's choice sooner or later?

I forgot the name of her home town. She told me it was the most dangerous part of Bulgaria. Corruption, drugs, weapons, rape, armed robberies e.t.c...
I think it's 2 to 3 hours from Sofia.
Anyway all countries are dangerous, just have to know where to be at the right time and place.

OMG, dude... I would be sweating my balls off... that's f**king crazy... wow, I definitely think that it's a bit dangerous.

- DADDY DOESN'T KNOW
- DRUGS
- GUNS
- RAPE
- ROBBERIES
- It's another country... it's not like you can just leave... O_o

[AngelinaTaylor]

OMG, dude... I would be sweating my balls off... that's f**king crazy... wow, I definitely think that it's a bit dangerous.

- DADDY DOESN'T KNOW
- DRUGS
- GUNS
- RAPE
- ROBBERIES
- It's another country... it's not like you can just leave... O_o

HAHAHA bullshit. Bulgaria isn't what you think it is. It's dangerous everywhere. Toronto has that too - drugs, guns, rape and robberies. Jeez.

Ask her for the town. I'm curious.

[maximelids]

Well yeah, that's why I am kind of worried.
Reading stories of poeple getting kidnapped in Bulgaria or scammed does not really make me feel any, -more secured!!

The thing is that her holidays are at a total diffrent timing compared to mine. We planned to meet in a another European country in summer, but I got school during that time, not to mention that my future is still un-stable (I might be going to bording school in another country. Long story in short) ..

Anyway her mother won't allow her to travel to me, until she meets me personaly. So I don't have much choice do I?

Well all I can hope is that her dad will at least welcome me with a hug instead of with a shot-gun ...

[AngelinaTaylor]

Well yeah, that's why I am kind of worried.
Reading stories of poeple getting kidnapped in Bulgaria or scammed does not really make me feel any, -more secured!!

And that doesn't happen in other countries? I lived there for most of my life. It's not what people make it out to be. It's a normal country. Sure, it's not top-safe, but I can honestly say it's safer than the states in particular aspects.

Just go for it. If you can afford it and if it's "true love", why not?

[vbabii]

aww well i hope you've seen pictures, talked on the phone together, talked on webcam or even written some letters?. Then at least you can know its her since your seeing her LIVE. Good luck with everything though if you decide to go. You might be in for something special. ;)

[skillxz]

jeez man..I don't know what to say, that is simply crazy, just the whole idea, but I give you much respect, definitely, you are very determined, always a good thing.

I just never believe I could get that far seriously out of an internet relationship, to the point where you're flying to another COUNTRY to meet someone, I mean you're taking so many risks, what if she's different in person, live? What if you guys aren't as open and easy going in person? What if you guys really can't hit it off, then you just wasted a thousand dollar trip, and stuck with her for the rest of the week...just so many what if's, yet again, if you didn't take the chance, I understand you would be wondering what if as well, just in the other direction.

Can your family afford this? Would your parents accept this, or would they think you were out of your mind? I hope you know what true love is, But you probably do, as you won't actually know until you've really felt it.

Keep us updated, best of luck!

[maximelids]

Yeah huge risks I am taking. But I think it is all worth while if it works out. It's really hollywood but I do beleive that if two people were meant to be together, nothing can stand in between them.

I worked during my holidays, so I will be using my own money.

I got another problem now. Lol my mother went back on her words..
Now she is reluctant to let me go. Hopefully I can think of something..

I'm scared that I will blank when I meet her face to face. It's like, online you got the time to think what you want to write, but in real life, I don't have the luxury of time ..

Anyway she told her dad about me,
he was like: 'I am happy you like each other, I want to ask that boy a question' Ouch...
Anyway at least i know he won't be welcoming me with a shotgun :)

May I ask you guys, what's the best thing to do when she welcomes me? Hug her? Kisses on the cheeks? I'm really scratching my head over this. Espicially if her parents are there.

[multifaceted]

^ say hello. No kisses, no hugs, no physical contact with her yet. Just sit next to the girl.

I would not travel to just see someone. What if the pictures are fake? What if she's (or he's cause you can disguise your voice) is a predator? You have to be cautious about these things. Don't do it.

[maximelids]

I'v planned to fly over to Bulgaria for a day before flying back to my country. I'm in France now, so it is cheaper and easier to meet her before I leave France next week.

Hopefully it all works out for me.
Thanks people for all the advice.

Max