The JUC CB Unholy Trinity, Ask for Relationship advice. !!!!BE WARNED. YOU WILL G Options

[bat19]

Well Hidy Ho and welcome to the first, yet hopefully not the last, JUC Trinity Post. For this first one, I will start it off. We consist of Me, Jake King who is without a doubt one of the funniest dudes you will meet, and Josh a.k.a uronacid, a CB member of some prestige and good reputation and all around cool dude.
Let's get right to it. You want relationship advice. Come to us. Just do it. Stop being homosexual(politically correct). But seriously, the best kind of advice is joke advice. Usually it's the right advice. Cause though we do make fun, we get to the issue at hand. I will start it off by saying I havent had a date in such a long time, Im beginning to think woman are a figment of my imagination. Help me brothers...

(p.s. Fictional. I actually was on a date not too long ago, but it didnt work out. She never talked. You know who I mean Josh and Jake)

[*Uronacid*]

Jeremy, I think you need to notice that our society has become more and more bisexual over the past 40 years. People are turning to same sex relationships left and right, and the only way to fit in is to try and dress up as the opposite sex.

Have you noticed the rampant growth of males wearing "uni-sex"... erf excuse me, their little sisters pants lately. Yes, these men are either blatently gay or they are trying to attract the opposite sex by dressing the same way that they do.

It's sucks you don't have a little sister like I do... I try her pants on all the time, and they fit very well, and I have a girlfriend now.

Thank you, Gloria.

[bat19]

Jeremy, I think you need to notice that our society has become more and more bisexual over the past 40 years. People are turning to same sex relationships left and right, and the only way to fit in is to try and dress up as the opposite sex.

Have you noticed the rampant growth of males wearing "uni-sex"... erf excuse me, their little sisters pants lately. Yes, these men are either blatently gay or they are trying to attract the opposite sex by dressing the same way that they do.

It's sucks you don't have a little sister like I do... I try her pants on all the time, and they fit very well, and I have a girlfriend now.

Thank you, Gloria.

I hate you. Im gonna burn all your pants. And your boxers. Lets see if you fit in her underwear

[iDecay]

Why not just have people make topics and you guys reply to them?

[*Uronacid*]

Why not just have people make topics and you guys reply to them?

Because we can't bash people in their own topics... if they come in here open and wanting to see some bashing then it's ok.

I hate you. Im gonna burn all your pants. And your boxers. Lets see if you fit in her underwear

If you burn all my pants I'll burn your house down you bastard!

[xxmisxtakexx]

Danielle Loves Brandon

Brandon Loves Drugs

Daniel Loves Danielle

Danielle No Love Daniel


Ah..

[bat19]

If you burn my house down, I'll throw your cell phone in the toilet. Then we'll be even

[iDecay]

Because we can't bash people in their own topics... if they come in here open and wanting to see some bashing then it's ok.
If you burn all my pants I'll burn your house down you bastard!

Bashing, ey?

PERSONAL ATTACKS
Flaming, trolling, member bashing-you name it-will not be tolerated here. If you're making an argument, it's always better to retort with reason and composure. Personal attacks are childish and have no place in these forums.

[*Uronacid*]

Is it really bashing if you arn't offending anyone? Jeremy isn't offended at all... he's like, one of my bestest friends... we do this all the time. xD

If you burn my house down, I'll throw your cell phone in the toilet. Then we'll be even

You probably wouldn't have to... just get me drunk and call me while I'm peeing... then i'll will drop it in on my own like I usually do.

[iDecay]

Hey, you know what, your own words. You said bashing yourself.

And I don't find it very much humorous if someone actually does have a problem and you guys would like to joke about it. Best kind of advice? Definately not joke advice. And you guys are basically just having conversations in here. Okay, I'm done. Bye.

[bat19]

PERSONAL ATTACKS
Flaming, trolling, member bashing-you name it-will not be tolerated here. If you're making an argument, it's always better to retort with reason and composure. Personal attacks are childish and have no place in these forums

I thought you were on our side? I gave you my stamp of approval. I said you deserved the admin job. Well, now Im not so sure. Maybe you shouldnt get that job. All you'll do is get into a hissy fit all the time. You hate your parents Missy, not me. So Don't hate me cause I speak Truth. If you need a date, go find the guys you normally would never talk to. Not the ones better than you, the ones lesser than you(though with that attitude, I'm not sure its possible). They will love and cherish you forever, from your probably webbed feet to your beautiful 6 fingered hands.

[*Uronacid*]

I thought you were on our side? I gave you my stamp of approval. I said you deserved the admin job. Well, now Im not so sure. Maybe you shouldnt get that job. All you'll do is get into a hissy fit all the time. You hate your parents Missy, not me. So Don't hate me cause I speak Truth. If you need a date, go find the guys you normally would never talk to. Not the ones better than you, the ones lesser than you(though with that attitude, I'm not sure its possible). They will love and cherish you forever, from your probably webbed feet to your beautiful 6 fingered hands.

Sounds like some good advice... taken

I'm taking this advice... no-one else can use it.

[Kontroll]

HAHAHAH. BEHOLD THE LEGENDARY JUC UNHOLY TRINITY!
I'll just have to kill you both. That's how we'll get this settled. Nice and easy.

I have some girl problems. Will you answer them for me 2/3 of the JUC Unholy Trinity?

Lately, I've been seeing this girl. Her name is Kay. I've been talking to her for about a week or so... A day ago I find out that she's 14! Like we said...age is only a number....But so is 5 to 7. I can't deal with that shit. She keeps calling me and leaving me voice mails and text messeges. So, finally I give in. I see her. We go out to the movies and she's really mature. I could actually see myself with her.

So, to make a long story short. We bumped uglies. Now, that was the fun part, but the bad part is she's threatening to tell her parents what happened. I'm sweating balls here. I don't know what to do. I show up at her school and I punched her in the face before I said anything. Then I fled the scene in haste.

That's that. I haven't heard back from her. I was interested in going out with her again, but I guess she doesn't feel the same way. Any advice in helping me get her to go out with me again?

[*Uronacid*]

if your having girl prorblems I feel bad for you son, cuz I got ninety nine problems but a btich ain't one!

[*krnxswat*]

Wow. You guys are the shit.

REALLY!

[bat19]

Its okay Jake. You're only human. But if I were you, I possibly wouldnt have punched her. What you should have said was "Well, I didnt tell you but I videotaped us doing it. If you say one word, I'll make sure to post it everywhere and anywhere I can before I go to the joint." It'd work

[Kontroll]

You're right Jeremy. I'll do that. Now I'm just worried that I got her pregnant.

I wasn't wearing protection. Now I'm getting this wierd sensation in my groin. It sort of burns when I piss. What's that? Do you know?

[bat19]

Wow. You guys are the shit.

REALLY!

Who invited you? Douchebag. j/k all are welcome. God bless

[*krnxswat*]

i'M gOing twO repOht u tO a mOhduhratOr nOw!!!!!!!!!!

[Kontroll]

i'M gOing twO repOht u tO a mOhduhratOr nOw!!!!!!!!!!

bitch.

[xxmisxtakexx]

So, to make a long story short. We bumped uglies. Now, that was the fun part, but the bad part is she's threatening to tell her parents what happened. I'm sweating balls here. I don't know what to do. I show up at her school and I punched her in the face before I said anything. Then I fled the scene in haste.

That's that. I haven't heard back from her. I was interested in going out with her again, but I guess she doesn't feel the same way. Any advice in helping me get her to go out with me again?

Ah ha ha ha ha

[*Uronacid*]

Who invited you? Douchebag. j/k all are welcome. God bless

You don't believe in god though... you're an athiest... xD

Well anyways, back to Jake's post.


Jake, buddy... you are in a world of shit. You are going to get charged with statutory rape as-well-as assualt. I would suggest either quickly getting on her good side (money works), travel 3 miles out to sea, or accross the border... yeah, you're in trouble/

[*krnxswat*]

bitch.

Aw, I think somebody needs a hug!
Everyone, grouphug!

[xxmisxtakexx]

So I've got one for you guys


I'm going out with a guy named Daniel, He's a virgin. I can't last long with out sex. How long should I wait before I take his innosence. Oh.. I don't love him. Cause everyone said I should wait till I'm in love.]





I don't think so. That will take too long.

[*Uronacid*]

So I've got one for you guys
I'm going out with a guy named Daniel, He's a virgin. I can't last long with out sex. How long should I wait before I take his innosence. Oh.. I don't love him. Cause everyone said I should wait till I'm in love.]
I don't think so. That will take too long.

ASAP, because if you don't... you might get put on mod preview hahahahhahahaha, btu alright... seriously...

You should really wait until he's ready... just be really nice to him to make him ready faster. Don't be yourself, just go for the gold. Go for what you need. Give him candy, buy him a car, whatever you need to do DO IT!!! LIKE NIKE!!!

[Kontroll]

So I've got one for you guys
I'm going out with a guy named Daniel, He's a virgin. I can't last long with out sex. How long should I wait before I take his innosence. Oh.. I don't love him. Cause everyone said I should wait till I'm in love.]
I don't think so. That will take too long.

Just do it when you want to. He'll fall into your trap. Literally. Hahh

[bat19]

So I've got one for you guys
I'm going out with a guy named Daniel, He's a virgin. I can't last long with out sex. How long should I wait before I take his innosence. Oh.. I don't love him. Cause everyone said I should wait till I'm in love.]
I don't think so. That will take too long.

Well, this one is for the books ladies and gents. I will have to say that Daniel seems like a great guy. Ask him if hes into bestiality. If he says yes to impress, test. God that was lame. "If he says yes to impress..."
Anyways, bring kittens into the bed with you. If he tries anything, dump his ass and get out quick. Hes not the one for you. If he is weird about it, pursue it further. Hope it helped

[*mona lisa*]

Well, now that this topic will no longer be of use (and importance).

Let me know if you want to start posting responsibly. Oh, and people can make their own topics if they wish to receive help and advice. Closed.