Poetry help! i'm really stuck Options

[mikazukix]

I have to write a poem reflecting on my grandma or my memories of her for her birthday event thing. I know it's kinda of a personal thing but she's just like any grandma kind and friendly, loving u know te usual.Anyways my job is to make a poem. It's kind of a formal thing so it can't be humourous.( well i don;t think it'll be very good if it was) I going to try to go with a rhyming scheme. Also.. i want to it sound professional but not too professional but then again i don't want it to sound like a little kid could write sumthing way better than me. The first line is the most important right? So i've been like stuck thinking for one.. that isn't so sappy or just weird. So.. can anyone help me out to what the first line might be? or maybe give me ideas of what it should be like ?
The best thing i can think of is something like "as time goes byI still remember all the times we've shared together" Bad right? It sounds kinda sappy. I've been stuck on this for like a month. seriously.. i wrote a couple poems but they all really really.. really.. suck. HOPe u can help out. I don't even know if anyone in createblog is into poetry. >.<

[Jeng]

wrong forum.
i think like start it off with....something comparing to her.like a metaphor i think.or was it a simile.idk

[*Duchess of Dork*]

A number of cBers are into poetry. In fact, I think the Writing Forum could use some more play.

Speaking of -

----> Writing

[bexwithab]

The first line isn't necessarily the most important. All of the lines matter; the first line pretty much sets the tone. For example, if you were going to write a sad poem, generally speaking, your first line wouldnt be happy.


I suggest putting some of the drafts you've already written up here and then maybe trying to take the really good lines out of them and making a new poem.

Or sit down and do a memory dump.

The title could be something like 'Things I remember about my grandma.' Each different thing could have its own line. Sometimes those make really good poems, other times it's just good to have them as a reference when writing.

Another thing... unless you have been writing for a while and are really familiar with rhyming, I don't suggest sticking to any sort of rhyme scheme, because about 90% of the rhyming poems I read (and write) show a struggle to make things rhyme. If the rhymes don't come naturally, then the poem won't sound natural.



The biggest thing, try to have fun when you're writing. Many times, the writer's emotion at the time a poem is written is conveyed through the words.
If you think that the poem is a hassle, it won't come out as well as it could have.



These are just suggestions, though. In the end it is your poem, and you should do what feels right for you.

[mikazukix]

Here's 1 of my poemsthat aren't very good

Congradulations on ur special day
Through the years you did portray your gift for cooking
your orderly nature
your faith in god
and your kind behavior
It is these points and many more,
that make you grand
for all to adore
So when yur down
with nothing to bare
Your friends and family are the ones
that care.

Yeah...... plus it'skinda short. I was actually thinking with starting with a metaphor or sumthing but.... i couldn't think of how to or what to compare her to. with out it sounding kinda weird. It has to be obvious cause my grandma doesn't really got those if thier deep metaphors. I thought that maybe a aabb scheme would be okay, or maybe a abab or a abcb. I was just worried that if i don;t stick to a rhyme scheme it might just sound like a speech.

[bexwithab]

That is a good start.
Maybe just fiddle with the line spacing and add more to it.
And edit it.


The only real advice I can give you is to write what you feel.

[*T0rmented_Soul*]

as time goes by, I still remember all the times we've shared
even though their just memories, i can never forget
though were both getting old, i would always care
living my life with you, how can i ever regret

I will always be here whenever your feeling down
ill make you laugh just to turn that frown around
your a very special person, i hold you dear
especially when i need that person to hold me near

do you remember when I was young you held me in your arms
from that moment I knew you would protect me from harm
if ever that day comes where life takes you away
i will still love you each and every day

got carried away but maybe something like this, will help boost your imagination, rhyming doesnt always have to be a poem but i found it easier for me ti rhyme.

[RememberTheForgo...]

The rhyme scheme isnt as important as you might think. Its about how it flows, how you say it. You can add a singsong type flow to it, simply by how you write it.

I think that the poem you posted would be good, just play around with it. Find more ... "poetic" words to put in or strengthen them, and make them longer. Changing your current sentences into metaphors, and other poetic devices will be better than trying to write something else from scratch. That way your working with something that you know came from your emotion...not something that your writing simply becuase it needs to be done and you dont think you cna do any better.

Just write from your emotions, play on how much you love her, and all the tender memories. Don't worry about the rhyme scheme, or the flow, or anything...just sit down and write it all down.

<3 rememberTHEforgotten