Help Me, I'm at my wits end Options

[starlette]

Okay so heres the thing.

My boyfriend and I have been together for four years now and I love him to death. No problem yet right?

Okay well a lot of you know I'm a singer, and I work really really hard to make my dream a reality. Like I bust my ass. And I also have apart time job right now because my mom left me with 1700 dollars worth of bills so yeah I'm busting butt right now, I mean I havevery little free time.

Then theres my boyfriend. His family is really wealthy (his lawyer father just retired and bought a 1.2 million dollar house in austin) and his dad is putting him thru college. Now at first its like, oh hes in college that great right? No its not. Hes only in college because his dad is paying for him to live and eat and all that crap. His major is a general studies. Now I don't knwo if y'all know but the general studies degree is somethign you can get at pretty much any community college...my boyfriend is going to a 10,000 dollar a year university. And all he can muster up after 5 years in college is a general studies degree. That doesnt even mean anything. All it does is give him placement over a guy with a high school diploma at jack in the box. Its pretty much worthless. and on top of that hes working a job at the university for 5.50 an hour. Washing dishes. And hes going to be out on his own after this semester and he thinks he going to be able to survive on a job he works 15 hours a week for 5.50 an hour. I work 30-35 hours a week for 8.00. And i keep trying to tell him to go get a better job and he won't even try. And its driving me crazy because its like here I am with dreams a goals and I'm with this complete lazy ass push over who doesnt know how to put forth any effort. And I feel like we shouldnt be together. I want someone with GOALS. God at least a goal like, get out of college and out of my moms house before I'm 35. And hes a sweet person and I love him but I feel like we can't be together because I'm moving forward and hes standing still. I mean he doesnt even know what hes going to do when he graduates. 5 years in college and hes going to just move in with his mother...or me probably. And I mean, I don't want to be supporting someone all my life...I want him to have his own goals and ambitions and not just sit around playing playstation al day getting fat off the food I bought. SO someone tell me what you think cuz this has been bothering me for a long time and I know its not ever going to change. And I still love him but I don't know if I can be with him in the long run.

[Trinie]

tell him how u you feel hun! but damn he really needs to think big!! liek seriously he isnt going to survive! but at least he is doing something with his life. my friends bf was actually just living of unemployment checks! he was such a bum! all he did was stay home, no school, no work, and gets checks every week. but tell him to like go back to school for a different major when he is done. i mean is there anything else he wants to do? like maybe be a doctor?

[starlette]

tell him how u you feel hun! but damn he really needs to think big!! liek seriously he isnt going to survive! but at least he is doing something with his life. my friends bf was actually just living of unemployment checks! he was such a bum! all he did was stay home, no school, no work, and gets checks every week. but tell him to like go back to school for a different major when he is done. i mean is there anything else he wants to do? like maybe be a doctor?

well at least my bf isnt that bad. but no he doesnt want to do anything. at all. He like one day wants to be a daddy, but he doesnt want to have a family til he can provide for them, but hes not planning anything for the future so he can providefor them! I don't know what to do. I mean his family is pretty wealthy so hes never really had to do anything for himself, and when he gets outof school and his dad pulls the plug i don't think hes gonna *get* it lol.

[you stupid fag]

Wow, you're ugly as f**k. How do you plan on getting anywhere like that? They say hard work does pay off in the end, but, I don't think it would exactly pay off for you. Seriously. Look at you.

[cassjamminx]

yeah i agree, just tell him how you feel. mention that you want to be with someone who has goals and maybe seeing as i'm sure he wants to be with you too, he'll rethink things. maybe he can get a better job to actually move out sooner or later. i'm sure things will work for the best in what you do. i haven't told you, but you've done a lot in your music career already, therefore you have so much ahead of you. if you feel like he's living off of you (eating food you've bought etc.) let the reality hit him, make sure he knows how you feel.

[***Lucy**]

Talk to him ,although u may discover that he doesn't have any goals. in this case leave him. after some years when you'll be trying hard and he won't be doing anything you wont be in love w/ him anymore.
Plus,it's not that he's lazy because his parents are richo..my parents left my brother and I a great inheretence,but my bro is in the university and studies hard to achieve his goals..

[loveTWOhateTWO]

Wow, you're ugly as f**k. How do you plan on getting anywhere like that? They say hard work does pay off in the end, but, I don't think it would exactly pay off for you. Seriously. Look at you.

WHAT THE f**k IS YOUR PROBLEM?

jesus christ. if she's a good enough singer, she'll make it. and gol, she's obviously going through something tough right now with all this shit. stop bashing. you're supposed to HELP her. and if you don't have any idea as to what she should do, then just click out the page, and find a different topic.




as for you, j'anelle, i really don't know what you should do. if he really doesn't want to get a good job, then there's nothing you can do, except keep trying to convince him. i would say keep at that, and if he doesn't change his mind... i dont know. i would imagine it hard to marry somebody who almost doesn't reel in enough money to survive.

[x_curse_of_the_c...]

wow that guy is blind the you stupid fag guy j'anelle is beautiful

[pinacoolada]

Wow, you're ugly as f**k. How do you plan on getting anywhere like that? They say hard work does pay off in the end, but, I don't think it would exactly pay off for you. Seriously. Look at you.

OH MY f**king GOD.
Get a f**king life and stop being mean!! Have you got no eyes, or have you just gone blind?

Look in the mirror before you judge. And if you have nothing nice to say, keep it to yourself.

[xlitoxb]

I say try going to the extreme and give him an ultimatum. It seems like he doesn't have much longer before his dad pulls the plug, so you say. Tell him that you're sick of him just lounging around and make him find a better job or figure out what he's gonna do with his life. If not, then he won't be in your future or you won't be in his. Maybe that'll finally give him a jolt. Hope it works out for you! =]

[*Uronacid*]

Influence him to get some goals for his life and encourage him to be a better person... There is nothing wrong with helping someone better themselves. I don't think that many people realize the influence that a loving girlfriend can have. :]



Here's a good story for you. Although in this story the man and woman are married, I think it might inspire you:

A husband and his wife pull up to a gas station in a BMW. A service man comes out to pump the gas, and the husband asks the service man to fill the tank. While service man the husband walks into the gas station to pay for his gas. He looks out the window and notices that his wife is talking to the service man. She laughing and seems to be carrying on a good conversation with the man. The husband is confused and and when he's finished paying for his gas he thanks the service man and gets into the driver seat of the beautiful car.

He looks at his smiling wife and asks her, "who was that?".

His wife looks back and replies, "That was the man I was going to marry before I met you."

They pull out of the gas station in silence, and stop at a light. A smile begins to form on the husbands face.

"What are you smiling about?", his wife asked with a puzzled look on her face.

"If you had married that man, you would have been married to a service man at a gas station. haha..."

The wife stops and thinks for a moment. Then she replies, "No, if I married that man then he would be the CEO of the gas company."





Guys appreciate your girls, and girls encourage your guys to be better people. :]

[starlette]

Wow, you're ugly as f**k. How do you plan on getting anywhere like that? They say hard work does pay off in the end, but, I don't think it would exactly pay off for you. Seriously. Look at you.

haha wow. This is funny. Only because I'm not even on createblog often enough to catch crap like this. I love people who call me ugly too. I think I might go cut myself

Anyway, thanks you guys, I appreciate the advice, and a special thanks to those who defended me against the above moron :) My boyfriend and I have been talking about this and I've basically been trying to appeal to him on the level of, do you want to be the guy who walks up to his wife and asks for the visa to buy something at the electronics store? Cuz I don't want to be with a guy who is gonna have to be my bitch because I control the money, and as a man I seriously doubt he wants to be the bitch lol. so yeah hes working to find a better job, even though he still has no idea what hes going to do with his life. I think part of it was that we sat down and had an intelligent discussion about it, and also hes taking a conflict management class in school and they talk about types of marriages, where traditional is man bings home the money, woman stays home and makes the babies, and there are two others and he thought the one where both people participated equally and cared for eachother and the home sounded the best, an if hes sitting at home playing nanny while im working, obviously we cant have that kind of relationship. So hes going to try and get in greag. Thank God. if worse came to worse I was going to show him this thread. lol.