Fear |
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| *Kathleen* |
 May 21 2004, 08:29 PM
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#1
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Fear
Hold me close and near Keep me away from the pain I fear Protect me now because I'm not as strong as I once was I fell through it all Watched me sink deeper and fall Capsized in my dreams Alone on my own as it seems From one second to the next I had it all and then nothing like the rest As I see death ahead I remember there you were - nothing said |
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May 21 2004, 08:32 PM
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#2
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 Senior Member  Group: Member Posts: 1,795 Joined: May 2004 Member No: 16,421 |
:claps: another good one.. they should have a rating system on these.. so we can rate the poems, lol well.. if they did, i'd say 9.3/10
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| *Kathleen* |
May 21 2004, 08:39 PM
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#3
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Hehe you're too nice. This is back when I didn't have that big of a vocabulary.
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May 21 2004, 08:43 PM
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#4
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Senior Member Group: Member Posts: 1,795 Joined: May 2004 Member No: 16,421 |
haha I see.. who says you need lots of diff words to write a good poem? I have a large vocabulary now, but I cant string them together into poetry very well
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| *Kathleen* |
May 21 2004, 08:52 PM
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#5
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Hehe...well I just see mine as...plain, I suppose? I feel like the words that I use to rhyme are so basic, you know? Hehe. I bet if you tried, you'd produce a terrific one.
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May 21 2004, 09:06 PM
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#6
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Senior Member Group: Member Posts: 1,795 Joined: May 2004 Member No: 16,421 |
QUOTE Hehe...well I just see mine as...plain, I suppose? I feel like the words that I use to rhyme are so basic, you know? Hehe. I bet if you tried, you'd produce a terrific one. Basic rhymes dont demerit the poem Meh... just because you said that, I'm going to write a poem in the next day, and prove you wrong  well.. we'll see
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May 22 2004, 12:41 PM
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#7
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 Liv's Secret Lover *shhhh* Group: Member Posts: 201 Joined: Apr 2004 Member No: 14,229 |
I like your writing style Kathleen, it's beautifully strung together. Nothing wrong with basic rhymes. Besides, I don't know many people who could rhyme a word like "Soliloquy" or something like that. Big words are often unnecessary.
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May 22 2004, 04:16 PM
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#8
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 Senior Member Group: Member Posts: 1,989 Joined: Apr 2004 Member No: 10,691 |
Its pretty good.
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| *NatiMarie* |
May 23 2004, 01:42 PM
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#9
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It's really good Kathleen. =) Wow, you're a great writer. Yay!
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