Please Help, We were so great... Options

[Trumpetman4eva]

Hi,

I have been dating my girlfriend for about 3 1/2 months. We met at a party last year and have been inseperable ever since. We started out as best friends and it escalated from there. About a month ago, she told me she had feelings for another guy. We talked, and those feelings went away within a week. Now I am always insecure about our relationship and am constantly worried she will leave me for him. She has explained many times that she loves me, but I still get weird when she talks about him. I love her so much and dont want her to leave me because of my insecurity.

Does anyone know how I can get over my insecurity?

[eunie03]

If she has feelings for another person, isn't it best she leaves you, despite your own feelings for her?

I don't think your insecurity is something you should get over.... You know that old saying. "If you love her, let her go. If she comes back, the other guy dumped her"

...Or something like that. Anyway, what I meant to say was... Keep that chin up

[_sarcastic_]

maybe you should just let her go
she can tell you that she's over him, but does she really mean it?
it's alright to feel insecure about something like that

[pinayprincess]

you have to trust her

[Chii]

Just keep in mind that she's with you, not him. She tells you she loves you and she admitted it to you. There's no need to worry. She won't just leave you out of the blue. I'm not sure if it's reassuring but at least you'll get a warning.

Relationships are built with trust and honesty among many other things. She was honest and upfont with you, you kind of owe it to her to trust her. It's not going to help your relationship at all if you dwell on the past.

[anoniez]

I'm very impressed she was so honest and up front with you, I agree with Chii - you just have to trust her now. It's okay to be worried and no one expects you to completely trust her, but don't be so jealous it's annoying and don't constantly rag her about it and bring it up. But I doubt that she will leave you any time soon if her feelings went away within a week etc etc - it seems like you guys have great communication.

[oOKittyKatOo]

i think you should trust your gf.. she had enough guts to tell you she had feelings for another guy.. she could of just kept it to herself.. but she loves and trusts you enough to tell her exactly what's on her mind.. i think that says something in itself..

stay with her and time will take away your insecurity =)


best of luck

[Trumpetman4eva]

thanks guys. she keeps sending me mixed signals. when we hung out on friday night, she was all over me. last night it seemed like she didnt want anything to do with me and was mad at me.

[_sarcastic_]

^talk to her

[*My Cinderella.*]

I've had a similar problem like this with my boyfriend. He told me something and now I'll tell it to you. You know what happened in your past and you're always going to hold it agaisnt her for it, no matter how hard you try to forget. The most you can do right now is learn to trust her and believe her when she says that she loves you, only you and no one else. Don't get yourself paranoid thinking about all these questions, whether she likes someone else. Just try to push them aside. The past is done, leave it there. If it bothers you that much, then talk to her about it and tell her how you feel. Good luck.

[Trumpetman4eva]

thanks guys. i am going to sit her down today and talk to her about how i feel. i hope she understands.