how to be scene, poking fun at those scenesters Options

[letsgoxdisco]

i seriously don't think this will offend anyone here. its just fun, its not like mean or anything. my friend katie came up with it a while back.



how to be scene

First and foremost, your AIM/MSN/any other instant messenger screen name should be some rad song title and/or lyric. Remember, the more x's you have in it, the more scene you are.

Next, go buy yourself some girl's jeans. Face it, the tighter your jeans are, the more scene you will be, and the more the hardcore kids will hate you for it. Try on a pair of jeans and find that you're a perfect woman's 8? Buy a woman's 6 and suck it in.

After you buy your jeans, go and buy every single band t-shirt. Even if you've never listened to the band, or worse, never heard of them either. [Being scene, you're supposed to know every single band in the scene. Duh.] If people ask you about them, just say you like the "old stuff" and no one will ever know that you actually hate Norma Jean. Never buy anything larger than a Youth Medium. EVER.

Dont forget to pick up a white leather belt on your way out!

So, now you're dressed pretty scene, but how's your hair? Is it dyed black? Maybe with some bleach-blonde streaks? Does your fringe [bangs] cover one of your eyes? If you answered no to any of these, shut up, grab a pair of scissors, and chop away. Never go and get your hair done, ALWAYS do it yourself.

Good job. Now your hair is the sex. But, your look wont get you anywhere if you dont know how to dance. And by dance, I mean beat the crap out of people. First of all, you need to make sure you claim your space in the pit. As the band starts, push everyone back and scream something obscene. Then you need to start to pace the pit just so everyone knows that you can move in your pants. Pacing the pit involves doing a half walk-half skip across the room, while looking downwards and shaking your head. But dont mess up your hair.
Then, when the time is right [trust me, you'll know when] throw your arm back and hopefully, you'll hit someone in the face.
5 scene points if his nose bleeds.
Begin two-stepping. If you dont know how to two-step, you might as well leave and go practice in your living room in front of a mirror until you get it. Add some sweet floor-punches and a couple spin-kicks into the crowd, and you're set. Notice how I didnt mention the windmill. It's because that everyone knows that everyone is able to do the windmill. Too bad.
Now for the pile up! As everyone runs up to the stage, make sure you go last so you can be that cool kid on top of the pile. If you dont know the words to the song, fake it, and hope that its just screaming.
Your job is done.
Stand in the middle of the floor, with your arms crossed and survey the scene.
Good job, scene. Good job.

So you're offically labeled an ass now that you've given a couple of people black eyes. That's ok, that's the point.

Now that you're back home, go straight for your computer and immediately check your myspace. Get really pissed off when you dont have any friend requests, and get even more pissed off when no one has left you a comment in the 6 hours you werent home. Figure its because you havent updated your pictures in a couple of weeks and go take some more. Take about 80, but use the 2 most flattering ones. Remember, the more skin you show, or if you're sitting on the toilet, the more comments you will get.

Go outside and have a cig break and redraw the black X's on your hands. Afterall, you ARE straightedge. Everyone KNOWS cigs dont count!

Look up at the stars, sigh, and thank god that you're not emo.
Even though you really are.

[lumpy]

umm maam, i really didnt think that this was funny. honestly, labeling yourself is redicilous, and then writing a guide on how to be a stereotype? grrl plz.

[aznxdreamer]

hah. i think its funny but seriously, im starting to get really sick of the whole "scene" "emo" thing. its annoying the crap outta me.

[marzipan]

that was kind of dumb

[bananapants]

umm wow lame
thats really lame and stereotypical
labeling urself is way uncool
and making a guide is even worse
u cant BE emo
its a type of music....

[colleen92]

hah. that was pretty funny. i mean i know you're not supposed to label people, but i must say this whole scene/emo thing is getting on my nerves. it's all so fake. ugh whatever....

[imnoxonesmemory]

that is very funny. made me laugh! =D

[The Nocturnal Ph...]

This sounds like something only a scene kid would laugh at.

"Dude.. This is so hilarious because it's so true, but inaccurate. Dude.. It's like the new Fall Out Boy song... A Paradox! -hair flip, takes out digital camera and takes a flash picture from a specific angle and uploads it on myspace-"

[magicfann]

umm maam, i really didnt think that this was funny. honestly, labeling yourself is redicilous, and then writing a guide on how to be a stereotype? grrl plz.

shut up, ur only offended cuz ur emo and emos have no say
i think its funny cuz i dont slit my wrists all day k?
LOL THE INTERNET

/end discussion

[*ECD & C0*]

haha it made me laugh

hah. i think its funny but seriously, im starting to get really sick of the whole "scene" "emo" thing. its annoying the crap outta me.

werd

[hollywood.]

Uhh. I didn't really find this funny. Emo is just a subgenre of music. Nothing more.

[lumpy]

shut up, ur only offended cuz ur emo and emos have no say
i think its funny cuz i dont slit my wrists all day k?
LOL THE INTERNET

/end discussion

who the hell are you to say that i'm emo? thats offending. like me calling people on this thread a racial slurr, yeah i prolly am blowing this out of proportions...but dude no. don't ever say that again.

[Paradox of Life]

umm maam, i really didnt think that this was funny. honestly, labeling yourself is redicilous, and then writing a guide on how to be a stereotype? grrl plz.

It's a joke ... just chill and enjoy it. People can make fun of themselves once in a while.

[rainbow piss]

Wow, you people have no sense of humor. It's funny because, as sad as it is, scene kids are really like this, & well, it's fun to laugh at them.

[lumpy]

stereotyping people like this is insulting...its like me calling you a beaner. see you don't like that, and no im not emo(because you can't be, its a genre of music) or scene(because 1, i don't seem to fit the stereotypical standards). it's just nonsense. someone close this thread please!

[justlikejames64]

Ha, this is pretty funny. It reminds me of http://www.howtobescene.com
I WISH I was THAT scene. haha

[S-Majere]

Remember, the more skin you show, or if you're sitting on the toilet, the more comments you will get.

I never understood that.

[HaruHaruko]

you guys take shit too seriously. who cares if people call themselves emo or scene, or if anyone else calls you that. you're just making it bigger than it already is.

harharharharharhar i found this video along time ago and it was entertaining. http://youtube.com/watch?v=WYPUgXrEmH4

[austinoutloud]

The scene kids are all so uptight about this.
So what if Emo is a genre if music. So was rock. Hence, "rockers" as with metal, "metal-heads". Go play pokemon.


I thought this was funny

[Cataclysm]

thats kinda low.
emo can be a style but don't stereotype.
mostly its a music genre

[S-Majere]

Ha, this is pretty funny. It reminds me of http://www.howtobescene.com

That website is pathetic. It's so unfunny I could weep.

[Amaranthus]

It's like a quiet chuckle laugh.
Not haha funny laugh.

But my friends would write an essay on myspace about how offended he was about it.
And how they're not scene.

[S-Majere]

I weep still.

[*yrrnotelekktric*]

haha,

"now your hair is the sex."

[austinoutloud]

It's like a quiet chuckle laugh.
Not haha funny laugh.

But my friends would write an essay on myspace about how offended he was about it.
And how they're not scene.

Haha. I know so many people that would do that. One of them did it about thow they;re not emo. Eughhh.

[y0urelectrikk]

heh.. I thought it was pretty funny

[Cow-Moo]

Lol it's pretty damn true..
but skinny jeans are just so damn comfortable.
i just got normal jeans. haha.

But hey, whatever you wanna wear.. go wear.

Ya knowwwwww?
Funny and true though..

[xCutUpAngelxxx]

First off, if you guys are going to label people, there's a difference between "scene" and "emo"."Emo" is a type of music.

Anyways, I actually found this list pretty amusing.

[none345678]

i dont much no any thing about scene kids or there music but this was funny

[JokeInsideJoke]

hehe LOLZERSROTFLMAOHAHAOMGTSF

[shaunxx]

haha,
this makes
me scene?

LMAO.
what a
breath
of
fresh air.

[Tramatize]

This is just lame, people will be what they want to be, don't like it, it isn't there problem.
Scene is just another label for outcasts to fit in.
I know this is pretty stupid, but i dont care im posting this picture.

[JokeInsideJoke]

^lmao