Aftermath of a long term realationship |
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Aftermath of a long term realationship |
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#1
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![]() mmm... coffee ;] ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Member Posts: 65 Joined: Jan 2004 Member No: 1,845 ![]() |
How do you cope with breaking up in a long term realationships?
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*salcha* |
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#2
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Guest ![]() |
eat chocolate, be emo, get a new girlfriend/boyfriend
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#3
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![]() Senior Member ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Member Posts: 279 Joined: Mar 2004 Member No: 6,406 ![]() |
only time can heal
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#4
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![]() naïvety ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Human Posts: 1,303 Joined: Jan 2004 Member No: 488 ![]() |
I can't.. at least, not yet.
Meanwhile i like to gobble chocolate and Pringles chips and torture myself with all the memories (specific songs/places/etc). |
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#5
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![]() cB Assassin ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Official Member Posts: 10,147 Joined: Mar 2004 Member No: 7,672 ![]() |
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#6
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![]() Blasian, Asian, INVASION! ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Official Member Posts: 4,288 Joined: May 2004 Member No: 16,769 ![]() |
With my first love, I got ova him when I just stopped all contact with him for a year. We recently saw each other and now good friends. Oh, and I occupied myself with a new bf which is now my longest relationship and still goin strong. u just needa get out there.
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#7
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![]() dakishimetainoni... ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Staff Alumni Posts: 4,322 Joined: Dec 2004 Member No: 75,318 ![]() |
QUOTE(mouse_3k @ Jan 24 2006, 11:24 AM) i agree...that's how i get over people sometimes. you have to gold cold turkey for awhile. when i do go cold turkey, i think of all the reasons why it ended and what was wrong with him. i also think about what i can improve on with myself. but ultimately, it helps to just let it all out now. if you try ignoring the pain, it will be a bigger kick in the pants later... |
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#8
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Senior Member ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Member Posts: 75 Joined: Oct 2005 Member No: 280,479 ![]() |
problems like that, i dont eat anything, i just starve and i just stay in my room, and dont really do anything but think, i cant function right when i feel like that. i hate it. is that normal?
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#9
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![]() Day's Nearly Over ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Staff Alumni Posts: 4,553 Joined: Aug 2004 Member No: 45,183 ![]() |
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#10
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![]() Member ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Member Posts: 226 Joined: May 2005 Member No: 144,979 ![]() |
QUOTE(Chii @ Jan 24 2006, 4:25 PM) i agree...that's how i get over people sometimes. you have to gold cold turkey for awhile. when i do go cold turkey, i think of all the reasons why it ended and what was wrong with him. i also think about what i can improve on with myself. but ultimately, it helps to just let it all out now. if you try ignoring the pain, it will be a bigger kick in the pants later... yup, yup. only safe way to cope in my opionion. |
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#11
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![]() Word. ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Member Posts: 3,004 Joined: Jul 2004 Member No: 34,673 ![]() |
after my first love, it was also a long relationship..
i got really emo but usually when i was with myself, i didnt like to show it in public but then eventually i started tlaking to my friends about it and then I talked to her.. i just started to be in agrees like to be friends and what not... we broke up last november and we talk soo much now, we talk soo much, it's like we never broke up but were always best friends |
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#12
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![]() Senior Member ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Official Member Posts: 6,953 Joined: Oct 2004 Member No: 52,702 ![]() |
you just need to have fun..party with your friends..and go home with numbers
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#13
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![]() Senior Member ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Member Posts: 889 Joined: Aug 2004 Member No: 42,392 ![]() |
its really hard. And seeing him everyday at school ( we have 2 classes together) doesn't help either.
I don't know. Just occupy yourself. |
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#14
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![]() <3 ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Member Posts: 3,657 Joined: Nov 2004 Member No: 64,493 ![]() |
QUOTE(Chii @ Jan 24 2006, 3:25 PM) i agree...that's how i get over people sometimes. you have to gold cold turkey for awhile. when i do go cold turkey, i think of all the reasons why it ended and what was wrong with him. i also think about what i can improve on with myself. but ultimately, it helps to just let it all out now. if you try ignoring the pain, it will be a bigger kick in the pants later... i should try that i just ended my long distance and long term relationship with my ex. he was cheating on me and i found out from the weirdest way. but i am not just killing myself with the memories and stuff |
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*iNyCxShoRT* |
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#15
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Well; my friends always say I should avoid the person I break up with for a while. After all; what you can't see can't hurt you. So I guess being distant can help die down the temptation for more.
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#16
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![]() banangst ♥ ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Member Posts: 727 Joined: Sep 2005 Member No: 237,399 ![]() |
when my bf broke up with his ex after a years relationship.
he sobbed at home for around 2-3 months until he started going out with me. missed school, fooked grades. |
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#17
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![]() <3 ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Member Posts: 185 Joined: Jan 2006 Member No: 365,309 ![]() |
Im not the kind of person to show emotion, unless everything gets too much, then i start breaking down in front of everyone :| but i tend to try & have fun instead, just get really busy to keep my mind of off it.
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#18
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Newbie ![]() Group: Member Posts: 1 Joined: Mar 2006 Member No: 383,725 ![]() |
whenever i had a long term relationship and we ended up breaking up;
we tried to stay good friends. but that didn't work out because he was still very into me and i was trying to get over him. so we just completely stopped talking or anything. eventually i got a new boyfriend who i'm very in love with and i gradually started talking to my ex again and now we're really good friends; we even ask each other for relationship help. we both bring up some things about the past and it's not even awkward. |
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#19
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![]() Being happy...is all that matters ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Member Posts: 765 Joined: Feb 2005 Member No: 102,284 ![]() |
Avoid all contact. This means no talking, no going to places where you know they'll be there, don't "accidentally" bump into them...just...pretend they never existed.
Treasure the memories, but don't dwell on them. If it helps, throw away everything that they gave you...if you'd like to keep them, stash it somewhere where you know you'll never go look for it. Occupy yourself somehow...learn something new, take a new class, organize your closet...do something to occupy your time. Time will heal all wounds, but you can help to speed it up by not thinking about them. What I did to get over him was to do this: everything I caught myself thinking about him, or us together, or anythign that tied the two of us together, I would force myself to think of three different things that are totally unrelated to him. Also, if I caught myself looking for him, I would force myself to look for someone else instead...anything to do with him, I just replaced with something else. Eventually it got to the point where he didn't exist in my mind. |
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#20
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![]() im not crazy im just a lil unwell... ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Member Posts: 88 Joined: Feb 2006 Member No: 382,236 ![]() |
i dunno about yall but listening to music and writing it always helps me just so that u know that other people go through the same thing and try to keep occupied
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#21
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![]() roosternamedingo. ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Member Posts: 1,211 Joined: Dec 2005 Member No: 333,926 ![]() |
try to find a hobby..comfort food more comfort food..make a "good riddance list"..list all the bad things about him/her..like "Stupid sweatshirt he wears all the time!" etc.. ( i got this one of a book, the idea is funny )
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*Blow_Don't_SUCK* |
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#22
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#23
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![]() (′ ・ω・`) ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Official Designer Posts: 6,179 Joined: Dec 2004 Member No: 72,477 ![]() |
its been a year and no, i am still not over him.
=( |
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#24
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![]() × Dead as Dillinger. ♥ ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Member Posts: 1,527 Joined: Mar 2006 Member No: 384,615 ![]() |
I really take it hard.
My current boyfriend has broken up with me FOUR times. But I keep going back to him because I just love him. It's hard to explain. I've created such a strong emotional bond that it seems impossible for me to be with anyone else. Call me a little psycho, but.. At first when he broke up with me I was SO pissed. Like, swearing everything to hell. But then I got majorly depressed. Like it was my fault. I think What did I do wrong? I go through everything we went through in my head and it just makes me cry, thinking that it will never happen again. I guess I'm just trying to be happy now with him but I'm so paranoid..even if I tell him I'm not. But to sum up all that mush, I take it pretty hard like any normal girl. I talk too much. |
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#25
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![]() </3 ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Member Posts: 1,113 Joined: Feb 2005 Member No: 106,746 ![]() |
I usually get really depressed. But I talk to some friends, write and other things.
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#26
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c[: ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Member Posts: 2,302 Joined: Feb 2004 Member No: 2,876 ![]() |
eat chocolate, be emo, get a new girlfriend/boyfriend lols funny one! ![]() but yeah..i would eat chocolate..because chocolate always helps you feel better. what i really did was i talked to a very good friend of mine, and well, i was thankful that my so called "boyfriend" was a total jerk and that our relationship didn't work out because i grew to like my friend, and i never would have guessed that he liked me too..and yeah... ![]() ![]() |
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#27
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![]() Tryina catch me ridin dirrty ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Member Posts: 166 Joined: Mar 2006 Member No: 389,030 ![]() |
be patience and go out more.
just have a blast with friends.. a lot. dont think about it.. and cool off with ur ex for a bit, let u guys go ur own ways from now and maybe meet again later, as friends? no drugs, no alcohol, no gettin wild n shid. just simple lovin laughs will help... at least for me. |
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#28
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![]() Senior Member ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Member Posts: 840 Joined: Dec 2004 Member No: 73,927 ![]() |
Get a new bf/gf?!?!?!?!! But won't that be unfair to the new bf/gf coz ur using them as a rebound?
Mine would'nt be a long term relationship compared to u guys out there eventhough when we started dating we knew that we were both looking for long term relationships........ and i could picture us together long term.......... *Lots of ice cream *Lots of crying *Talk to frds *Torturing myself with photos of us/memories of us............. *Still GETTING tortured by the place he broke up with me which was a park near our houses coz we live 10-15 minutes walking distance from each other.... & i have to wait infront of that park for the next few years for bus to go to Uni..... eventhough I'm trying my best to avoid having to take the bus at the moment. But if mum's too busy and can't take me then i'll hve to take the bus to the train station..... *Think what I learned from that relationship & how to improve myself if anything was wrong *Try to relax *Keep myself busy so that I won't think about it too much *See if there's a possibility we can become "real" friends again, since he let me be his frd when he asked...... we won't be talking online for a while.... i want to give him some space and for myself too so that he can be comfortable with being frds with me again.....if thats ever possible...... so yea... |
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*disco infiltrator* |
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#29
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I know it's really frustrating when people tell you that you'll get over it eventually; I felt the same way when my ex dumped me. But really, it's true. It sucks for a while and the best and most important advice I can give you is do not continue to see the person. As much as you still want to be friends, you can be friends later. Continually seeing them and hanging out with them as if nothing happened can really hurt you.
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#30
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There'll be no distance that could hold us back ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Member Posts: 137 Joined: Mar 2006 Member No: 388,163 ![]() |
Don't eat for weeks.
Cry. Cry. Cry. Fetal position. Sleep. |
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#31
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![]() Junkie's Running Dry ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Member Posts: 317 Joined: Jul 2004 Member No: 34,797 ![]() |
I find curbstomping them to be an appropriate way to deal.
Anyone with me? |
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#32
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![]() oh boober. ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Member Posts: 224 Joined: Feb 2006 Member No: 375,884 ![]() |
pretend you have your period because you have an excuse for being cranky, eat oily foods and chocolate, watch HBO 24/7
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#33
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![]() i've never wanted anything rationale. ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Staff Alumni Posts: 8,449 Joined: May 2004 Member No: 19,045 ![]() |
I really take it hard. My current boyfriend has broken up with me FOUR times. But I keep going back to him because I just love him. It's hard to explain. I've created such a strong emotional bond that it seems impossible for me to be with anyone else. At first when he broke up with me I was SO pissed. Like, swearing everything to hell. But then I got majorly depressed. Like it was my fault. I think What did I do wrong? I go through everything we went through in my head and it just makes me cry, thinking that it will never happen again. ![]() It is so hard to not be friends. We have been together and seen eachother basically everyday for a year and a 1/2 and to go cold turkey is almost impossible. Our friends are the same and we have classes together. Plus, we are young and stupid and have hooked up twice since the break up. It is so hard because it feels amazing when we are together and alone but I know I should move on. I already don't have as strong as feelings for him as I did before (I'm not in love), I just like being with him. |
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#34
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![]() Hello There. ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Member Posts: 1,572 Joined: Jan 2005 Member No: 88,673 ![]() |
watch sad movies. attempt to become friends. me and my ex are friends. btw.
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*FreeStickers* |
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#35
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I take it really hard, because in a long term relationship, you get so used to something being there, then one day, it's just NOT there anymore. It sucks. Really, it does. My boyfriend and I broke up in July after dating for two years and we're just getting to the point where we can talk like normal people. For about 3 months, I just moped around and ate a lot. Moping is really hard to do when you're trying to hide it from everyone you know.
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#36
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![]() daughter of sin ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Member Posts: 1,653 Joined: Mar 2006 Member No: 386,134 ![]() |
What I did the first time I broke up with my boyfriend (we've broken up three times o.O But we've been together for a year and a half).. was I buried myself with a LOT of work just to forget (I'm a pianist, so I started practicing like 6 hours a day), and I was seeing someone else at the time too.. which helped.
Time heals.. Don't force yourself to get over him though. Taylor`` |
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#37
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![]() Naughty... ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Member Posts: 135 Joined: Mar 2006 Member No: 388,724 ![]() |
Take up a new hobby or something that you can immerse yourself in. I totally just immersed myself in school and made a lot of new friends when I broke up with my boyfriend. That helped a lot. Now I have a new boyfriend and things are really looking up.
Yeah, it's cliché, and yeah, it sucks, but just give it time. |
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*Programmer* |
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#38
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Guest ![]() |
just dissappear...get your mind on other things you need to do....eventually u'll either forget or see the person again...and then the choice is up to you....
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#39
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Newbie ![]() Group: Member Posts: 7 Joined: Apr 2006 Member No: 393,186 ![]() |
cry, eat, sleep, cry eat, sleep and then one day just stop crying and then have to diet...........roflol
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*SuzieRawkSoxx* |
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#40
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You know i really dont know what to tell you because ive been with my boyfriend almost 7 months now and i L O V E him to D E A T H and i really dont know how our heaven forbid break up would affect up...
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#41
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![]() cool by default. ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Member Posts: 147 Joined: Apr 2006 Member No: 392,925 ![]() |
i just find things to distract myself from thinking about him. hanging with friends and not seeing the guy helps me get over him.
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#42
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Senior Member ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Member Posts: 192 Joined: Apr 2006 Member No: 393,426 ![]() |
as much as it hurts... you need to stop contact. if you have memories of him like pictures or gifts that he gave you.. put them away in a box and hide it. it really helps. my first love i'm stil not over even thou i have a new boyfriend.
hang in there. go out, have fun and just try not to think about it too much <33 |
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