how do you vent?, after the lost of a loved on Options

[lidoaznboi89]

so how do you vent, mourn, that sort of thing, after you lost a loved one,
do you get over it? do you just put it back in your head? what did you do?

[*Programmer*]

i keep myself busy. going to work..doing extra assignments....for work...i swamp myself in so much stuff i don't have time to think about the person.. seems to work good. keeps your mind from wandering..

[Just_Dream]

Cry. I know it's painful, but letting out the pain will help. Slowly, you'll learn to let go, but never forget.

I know when I was little, I lost a family friend and he was old (like in his late 90's) and his wife cried. My mother comforted her. It hurt me so much because the husband, who died, was so kind and loving. I miss him. I miss his wife, who used to bake delicious cookies for me and when I saw her cry, I learned that her husband had died the night before. It hurt me so much knowing that I'd never see him again.. I cried, A LOT.

This happened when I was little and when I cried that day, I slowly started to feel at ease, knowing that it couldn't be changed and all people die. Sheesh, I think I was 4 years old at that time. :/

It's back in my head, yes, but I think about it from time to time. :/

[NgocQuyen]

i cry, and usually my closest and truest friends listen to me and support me. i write my my journals. i usually don't report it in my online journals not unless i have to because its just too personal to do such a thing....hehe....but yes...i usually talk to my friends about it and they help me through it ^^

[yourfriendsteph]

I know I shouldn't, but most of the time I let things build up. I have a hard time opening up to people, so the easiest way for me to let it out is to of course cry, and write.

[_sarcastic_]

i just break down and cry, sometimes i talk to my closest friends about it

[teeners4]

i pretend everythings alright. go out more. do more things. just move on. but in the end i still think about it and i wanna cry but i don't. when you're doing things to distract it doesnt really work. but thats what i do. i dont really tell anyone

[*mipadi*]

I don't "vent". Death is a natural part of the life process; I think it's more important to remember good times with the deceased, rather than focus on his death.

[Hiphop d[-_-]b]

^ Yes. I Mourn and cry for them but i dont linger on the fact that they died, i tread on the memories.

[lidoaznboi89]

wow.. for all what you guys say.. btw im the one who started this topic..

i just wanted to knwo what you guys thing.. and how you guys deal with it.

for me.. after a lost of 13 years.. in a month its gonna be 14..i still can't get over it. i don't know why.. i never really mourn or anything till now. and im 16.. its pretty hard and everyone goes through with it.

as one had say.. its only a part of life.. but then again.. it can be substain for a little period of time. or stop..

what do you do if you don't have the "memories" with them.. or no rememorence

[lit0chinagirl]

cry-- as much as i hate to, you just feel so much better when you wake up the next morning after a good cry
talk it out with friends
write out what i want to say to them but cant
but for some reason, death doesn't hit me as much as i thought it would.
i was sad for my grandfather's death but i knew that he was in a happier place after all those months in the hospital with cancer.

[misoshiru]

when i heard one of my friends had died, i first kept it inside because i knew my parents would tell me that it's stupid to cry. but then, at school, i was talking to a friend, and i couldn't help it, all my emotions came out, and i cried my little heart out. i still grieve for my friend, but after that cryfest i had, i knew i'd acccepted it, and i could move on.

[timeflies51]

Well, I've only lost one person that was really close to me - my nanny. She died a little more than two years ago (I can't believe it).

On the day of the funeral, I only got tears in my eyes. I don't know why I didn't cry, but I think it was because I was still in shock, still leftover from the day I got the news - I couldn't believe that she was really gone. She was supposed to be here, arms wide open, smiling and spreading joy to everyone around her...

Whenever I visit her grave I still get those tears in my eyes. Sometimes I'll think about it and I still can't believe she's gone.

What I did to mourn - I cried in the days afterwards. I would talk to her in my mind, apologizing for all of the lost moments I could've spent with her (I was kind of distant in the last few years that she was alive).

However, I didn't let it bring me down. Life goes on, you know? I'm sure your loved one wouldn't want to see you suffering because of them.

"Better by far you should forget and smile
Than that you should remember and be sad."