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Please respect our community and follow the rules. There are many types of humor so we can do without those that aim to hurt/offend individuals and groups of people alike.
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NO OBSCENITY
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If a topic exists a couple of pages away covering the same issues then the new one will be deleted or merged. Look through the pages to see if it has already been posted, if not then it should be okay to post.
Please do not violate the guidelines. It is here for a reason and is not to be ignored.
Thank you.
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 Aug 30 2005, 05:47 PM
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#1
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 Rock Music Enthusiast  Group: Member Posts: 430 Joined: Jun 2005 Member No: 160,803  |
It's the mid 1800s and a British captain is commanding his ship in dangerous enemy waters.
His first mate runs to him and yells, "there's a hostile pirate ship headed our way, what should we do." The captain says, "prepare the defenses and brace for an attack, but first, get my red shirt!" The first mate does as asked and the British vessel holds off the pirates, the captain fights very valiantly. The next day, the first mate comes to the captain again, and says, "two pirate ships are headed our way, what should we do?" The captain looks at him again and says, "Get my red shirt, then fight those pirates off like you've never fought before!" The captain and crew once again were able to successfully fend off the pirates, and after the battle, but first mate asked the captain, "You are one of the bravest men I've ever seen, but why do you always ask for your red shirt before a battle?" The captain smiled and said, "Well, I want you all to know that I'm fighting to the best of my abilities, and if I am wounded in battle, I don't want you or the rest of the crew to think something is wrong for morale, that way you won't become disheartened, and you'll continue to fight just as fiercely." The first mate thought about this and then said "That's a brilliant idea, but there are 15 pirate ships headed for us, should I get your red shirt?" "No, get my brown shorts first" |
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Aug 30 2005, 05:50 PM
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#2
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alli Group: Member Posts: 513 Joined: Apr 2004 Member No: 10,108 |
funny =)
..where do u get all ur jokes from? |
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Aug 30 2005, 06:46 PM
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#3
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Rock Music Enthusiast Group: Member Posts: 430 Joined: Jun 2005 Member No: 160,803 |
lol, most of them are just jokes that were told to me over the years that I still remember and tell other people (I have a very good memory). There are still plenty sitting in my old noggin.
When I can't think of any though, I'll look some up on the internet on joke sites, but I only pick ones that actually make me laugh when I read them. Glad to hear everyone else thinks they are funny too. |
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Aug 30 2005, 10:21 PM
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#4
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 Randomness rules Group: Member Posts: 128 Joined: Nov 2004 Member No: 64,288 |
brown shorts is something i would need
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Sep 2 2005, 06:49 PM
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#5
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 The Noob Group: Member Posts: 575 Joined: Jul 2005 Member No: 169,647 |
is the brown for pissing?
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Sep 2 2005, 06:53 PM
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#6
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 *scribble scribble* Group: Member Posts: 1,314 Joined: Mar 2005 Member No: 119,610 |
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Sep 2 2005, 10:21 PM
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#7
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 unify and defeat... divide and crumble Group: Member Posts: 2,759 Joined: Mar 2004 Member No: 6,379 |
QUOTE(Kevinxp @ Sep 2 2005, 6:49 PM) is the brown for pissing?  yea that brown piss.... 
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Sep 4 2005, 08:51 AM
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#8
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yerp! Group: Member Posts: 3,489 Joined: Nov 2004 Member No: 66,454 |
Ew...lol.
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Sep 4 2005, 07:18 PM
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#9
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 Senior Member Group: Posts: 8,274 Joined: Mar 2004 Member No: 8,001 |
LMAO. Captin is so smart.
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Sep 7 2005, 05:42 PM
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#10
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 LOok at the ROse, NOt thiS! Group: Member Posts: 40 Joined: Aug 2005 Member No: 201,015 |
QUOTE(aznxboredxperson @ Sep 4 2005, 7:18 PM) LMAO. Captin is so smart.
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